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(Some Guy)   Pelham middle school teacher meets horny 15 yr-old online, thinks taking her virginity will be easy as 1 2 3   (lohud.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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21042 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jun 2009 at 10:13 AM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



134 Comments   (+0 »)

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2009-06-27 08:51:50 AM  
I see what you did there, Mr. Green.
 
2009-06-27 09:01:37 AM  
There's two kinds of 15 year old girls looking to hook up online:

Cops

Also Cops


If you're talking to a 15 year old chick online, and she like the Eagles and '75 Chargers as much as you do, chances are she's not who you think she is.
 
2009-06-27 10:14:09 AM  
How farking dumb do you need to be to still get caught like this?
 
2009-06-27 10:16:14 AM  
Glad to see that man are treated the same as women.
 
2009-06-27 10:17:36 AM  
Wouldn't that headline make more sense if he had met a 10-year-old boy online?
 
2009-06-27 10:19:22 AM  
img442.imageshack.us

/obligatory
 
JJR
2009-06-27 10:19:27 AM  
...text for the very first time...
 
2009-06-27 10:19:34 AM  

HE IS A MAN!!! REMOVE HIS BALLS NOW!!! PUT HIM IN PRISON WITH OTHER FATHER RAPERS!!! ELEVENTY!!111!!11

 
2009-06-27 10:20:17 AM  
Just like days before a new movie is set to hit a an "unrelated and yet totally related" article effectively about it appears on CNN.com, we now see subtle hipster marketing on fark. oy vey.
 
2009-06-27 10:23:40 AM  
fxha.com

What horny 15yr old online teenagers may look like.
 
2009-06-27 10:25:31 AM  
If convicted, he faces at least 10 years and a maximum of life in prison.

Wow... a minimum of 10 years for trying to boink a consentual but under-the-magical-age teenager.

Dude should have just found one he liked and raped her. He'd only be looking at, maybe, 8. It's the better value.
 
2009-06-27 10:25:57 AM  

Contents of a Space Wasp's stomach: How farking dumb do you need to be to still get caught like this?


This is why I don't think it's a problem worthy of Chris Hansen. I just have a hard time believing that online chats ever result in adult men having sex with underaged girls. Or boys.

Chris Hansen ought to be using his powers to solve other mysteries.
 
2009-06-27 10:26:59 AM  
So he didn't actually do anything illegal?
 
2009-06-27 10:27:24 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?


Thought crimes, citizen.
 
2009-06-27 10:28:03 AM  
What movie? Sounds hot!
 
2009-06-27 10:29:47 AM  

kidsizedcoffin: Thought crimes, citizen.


Well I'm f*cked then.
 
2009-06-27 10:31:14 AM  
wouldn't be fun if you weren't "taking" it
 
2009-06-27 10:32:29 AM  

eraser8: I don't think it's a problem worthy of Chris Hansen.

 
2009-06-27 10:34:04 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?


I guess attempted murder shouldn't be a crime either, eh?
 
2009-06-27 10:37:50 AM  

kidsizedcoffin: Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?

Thought crimes, citizen.


There's a difference between 'thought crimes' and 'farking perverted illegitimate spawn needs to be executed.'

That's right, you try sleeping with underage kids, knowing they're under age? You die. That will cut waaayyy down on the whole kid-diddling field of criminals. Both by attrition and deterrence.
 
2009-06-27 10:38:14 AM  

eraser8: Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?

I guess attempted murder shouldn't be a crime either, eh?


The crime of failure.
 
2009-06-27 10:39:26 AM  
What an idiot. Everyone knows that all females online are gay dudes or cops.
 
2009-06-27 10:42:15 AM  

Gish21: What an idiot. Everyone knows that all females online are gay dudes or cops.


Or gay cops.
 
2009-06-27 10:43:07 AM  

eraser8: I guess attempted murder shouldn't be a crime either, eh?


Sure, attempted murder and talking to a dude who is pretending to be a young girl are exactly the same thing. Exactly.
 
2009-06-27 10:45:03 AM  
It's still legal to troll the chat groups for hot female police cadets, right?
 
2009-06-27 10:45:40 AM  

General Vayo: kidsizedcoffin: Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?

Thought crimes, citizen.

There's a difference between 'thought crimes' and 'farking perverted illegitimate spawn needs to be executed.'

That's right, you try sleeping with underage kids, knowing they're under age? You die. That will cut waaayyy down on the whole kid-diddling field of criminals. Both by attrition and deterrence.


You do realize that less than 100 years ago, it wasn't abnormal for 15 yo females to get married to older men in the US? My wife's grandma married her grandfather when she (the grandma) was 15 and he was 25. She was married to that pervert for 47 years and had 7 children with him.
 
2009-06-27 10:47:09 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: Sure, attempted murder and talking to a dude who is pretending to be a young girl are exactly the same thing. Exactly.


In having a specific intent to commit a particular crime and taking affirmative steps to carry that intent into action? Yes. Yes, they are.
 
2009-06-27 10:47:25 AM  

Mordis: Gish21: What an idiot. Everyone knows that all females online are gay dudes or cops.

Or gay cops.


or gay dude cops
 
2009-06-27 10:48:47 AM  

General Vayo: That's right, you try sleeping with underage kids, knowing they're under age? You die.


Jesus. Can you imagine a law like that in states that don't have a "Romeo & Juliet" clause? You'd have high schools where you'd lose giant swaths of the population, being felony child rapists and all. It'd be like the Matrix. Entire crops would be lost.

That's OK, though. Because they're sick monsters. You should probably stone the girls to death, too. Those sick whores who are having sex before they turn 18 are an insult to god.
 
2009-06-27 10:50:20 AM  

eraser8: In having a specific intent to commit a particular crime and taking affirmative steps to carry that intent into action? Yes. Yes, they are.


You can't use the same definition for both of these situations at all. It does not work like that. Critical thinking has to come into play somewhere.

Look at what someone else said, you could probably rape some 8 year old and get less jail time. That's what scares me.
 
2009-06-27 10:51:34 AM  
FTA - "Defense lawyer Clinton Calhoun could not be reached for comment yesterday."

i43.photobucket.com>
 
2009-06-27 10:51:59 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: So he didn't actually do anything illegal?


FTFA: The investigation picked up steam in March this year when an informant told police that she "parties" with a teacher named Gregg, that he was looking to have sex with a 14- or 15-year-old girl and that he offered her $500 to bring him one, authorities said.

Sounds like he was not lured, but rather was actively seeking out underage girls. I sometimes have a small bit of sympathy for these creeps when the police appear to be taking advantage of their compulsions. There are situations where it's not clear if a crime would have occurred if the police hadn't trolled, but in this case it sounds like this teacher was intent on finding a girl.
 
2009-06-27 10:52:20 AM  
The taking of Pelham 15?
 
2009-06-27 10:53:33 AM  

orat-on-a-stick: Mordis: Gish21: What an idiot. Everyone knows that all females online are gay dudes or cops.

Or gay cops.

or gay dude cops


Couldn't it once be a hot female cop? At least then I they wouldn't feel as bad.
 
2009-06-27 10:54:08 AM  
I get turned on by cops pretending to be underage girls.
 
2009-06-27 10:55:06 AM  
Chrissakes, when I was a kid here in Canadaland it was legal to have sex with ANYONE when you were 14. Harper just made it 16 for adults, 14 for kids I think.

The girl I dated when I was 14 was my age, but looked like she was 20. She was dating a cop while banging me. That's how we roll up here: Free Love.

My point is that a magical coming-of-age age is beyond stupid, it's a trap. In the US, there ought to be a zone of years during which kids are allowed to hump each other without becoming sex offenders themselves.
 
2009-06-27 10:55:17 AM  

True Value: FTFA: The investigation picked up steam in March this year when an informant told police that she "parties" with a teacher named Gregg, that he was looking to have sex with a 14- or 15-year-old girl and that he offered her $500 to bring him one, authorities said.

Sounds like he was not lured, but rather was actively seeking out underage girls. I sometimes have a small bit of sympathy for these creeps when the police appear to be taking advantage of their compulsions. There are situations where it's not clear if a crime would have occurred if the police hadn't trolled, but in this case it sounds like this teacher was intent on finding a girl.


Ok, well there you go. I did not fully read into this and I will admit I'm wrong. The police recieved credible intel and knew this guy was looking, so they didn't have to really troll him in.

I'm more speaking of the To Catch a Predator bullshiat.
 
2009-06-27 10:56:39 AM  

"Cavaluzzi, a longtime Yorktown resident, told officers he had a $500-a-week cocaine habit. "


What kind of salary does a teacher up there make to support a $500/week cocaine habit, or was he using the 15 year old to steal her lunch money?

 
2009-06-27 10:56:41 AM  
Just move to one of the many countries that have lower ages of consent? Link (new window)
 
2009-06-27 11:00:32 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: You can't use the same definition for both of these situations at all.


What the fark are you talking about? You seemed to object to the charge by rhetorically asking the question "So he didn't actually do anything illegal?"

I responded by pointing out that we have criminal offenses (like attempted murder and conspiracy) that don't require the law to wait until a person is dead or raped or defrauded to act against psychopaths. This guy wasn't arrested for just thinking about having sex with a minor; he was arrested for putting those thoughts into action, even though he was stopped before his actions bore fruit.

Tat'dGreaser: Look at what someone else said, you could probably rape some 8 year old and get less jail time. That's what scares me.


Even if it were true -- which is doubtful in the offender's jurisdiction -- that really has nothing to do with my point, which is this: just because this guy didn't manage to have sex with an underage girl doesn't (and shouldn't) mean he didn't do anything illegal in trying to have sex with an underage girl.
 
2009-06-27 11:08:38 AM  
Screw the rest of you. I had to brain that headline real good for a bit, but I LOL'd.

/ +1
// also, no defense for thoughtcrime
 
2009-06-27 11:08:56 AM  

doglover: There's two kinds of 15 year old girls looking to hook up online:

Cops

Also Cops


If you're talking to a 15 year old chick online, and she like the Eagles and '75 Chargers as much as you do, chances are she's not who you think she is.


I once accidentally met a horny 15-year-old girl online who I'm convinced wasn't a cop (she had too many pictures of herself and too well-developed a social profile on Facebook to be easily faked). But I did the responsible thing and never tried to meet her face-to-face, which may explain why I haven't been in a Fark headline yet.

/she got over it
 
2009-06-27 11:10:56 AM  
Cavaluzzi, a longtime Yorktown resident, told officers he had a $500-a-week cocaine habit.

Is cocaine use an acceptable defense to charges of enticing a minor for sex? Good to know.
 
2009-06-27 11:12:04 AM  

Sock Therapy: Is cocaine use an acceptable defense to charges of enticing a minor for sex? Good to know.


I just tell them I'm trying to cure my AIDS.
 
2009-06-27 11:33:33 AM  
Remember. All the hot 15 year old girls looking to hook up with teachers are cops.
 
2009-06-27 11:35:27 AM  

Robert1966: Wouldn't that headline make more sense if he had met a 10-year-old boy online?


*snort*
 
2009-06-27 11:39:07 AM  
Tat'dGreaser 2009-06-27 10:26:59 AM So he didn't actually do anything illegal?
========================================

Pretty much.

/Sadly, it's still illegal.
//It's retarded.
 
2009-06-27 11:39:40 AM  

funmonger: My point is that a magical coming-of-age age is beyond stupid, it's a trap. In the US, there ought to be a zone of years during which kids are allowed to hump each other without becoming sex offenders themselves.


QFT. The numbers are completely arbitrary and they only exist in reaction to us trying to "protect" our precious little snowflakes.

Plus, it's completely stupid to think that having sex with a 16-year-old in more than half of the US is perfectly legal, and in the other half I'm a rapist and a sex offender. What the hell is that?

From Wikipedia:

upload.wikimedia.org

Note the parts of the world where the age of consent is 16 and above, as opposed to 16 and below. It's pretty telling.
 
2009-06-27 11:43:13 AM  

austerity101: Plus, it's completely stupid to think that having sex with a 16-year-old in more than half of the US is perfectly legal, and in the other half I'm a rapist and a sex offender. What the hell is that?


States' rights.
 
2009-06-27 11:43:33 AM  

doglover: There's two kinds of 15 year old girls looking to hook up online:

Cops

Also Cops


Ten, thirteen years ago, when AOL was all most people had and IMs could stall your computer if they came too fast, it wasn't that way at all. When I was 18 and 19 I was able to meet some decently horny real girls, and although they tended to be chub-chubs, they should could suck the chrome off a bumper.

Now the novelty has worn off and too many criminals have raped or killed girls and women, ruining it for the rest of us.
 
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