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Cuddling sharks, Egyptian weenectomies and the Gayest Place on Earth: Headlines of the Week 5/31 to 6/6 
Posted by Drew at 2009-06-08 2:44:36 PM (28 comments) | Permalink
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5535 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jun 2009 at 2:52 PM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



No posting this week.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2009-05-31 to Sat 2009-06-06:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Egyptian man cuts off own penis. Osirisly    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  "You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel"    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Some guy in California who had 13 expensive rabbits just reported to police he had 77 rabbits stolen. Thief spotted in truck with 200 rabbits. Police hope to recover the 42,987 rabbits by tomorrow    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  North Korea begins assembling a long range rocket in their attempts to further map the local seabed    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Controversial topless coffee shop goes tits up    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Harvard to offer endowed professorship in gay studies, which doesn't mean what you think it means    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Thousands of chickens die in fire. Firefighters struggle to control flames, appetites    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Tourette's most common in white kids, boys, c**ks**kers    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Oregon teen struck by lightning, immediately grounded    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Police search for rocket man responsible for launching 7 ft long civilian-made rockets that buzzed two Continental airlines planes in the skies over Houston sometime around zero hour 9:00 AM    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  "Gay Days" at Disneyworld expected to bring in $100 million. A hundred million sweaty, buff, tan, oiled up, leather-wearing dollars    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Sports:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Just as the Yankees get their Wang fixed, the Mets break their Putz    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Amanda Hubbard of Georgia wins three gold medals at U.S. National Weightlifting Championships. I told you her snatch was impressive    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  The demolition of Tiger Stadium was halted by a judge Friday. Plans are to let it fall apart naturally, like the rest of Detroit    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Geek:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Sharks can be "cuddled like Dolphins", according to Dr Stumpy McStumperson from the institute of really bad ideas    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Newsweek: American obesity jumps in last year. But not very high    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Antioxidants in human sperm reduce facial wrinkles. Here comes the science, it's coming, oh yes get ready it's coming    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Showbiz:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Cox and Arquette set to make "Scream 4: Career Death Rattle"    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Amy Winehouse wants "black kids" which would really match her liver    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Kwai Chang Came    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Politics:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Toner, ex-aide to Eisenhower and Nixon, dies, will be shaken and reinserted to work a few more days    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Al Gore given License to Il    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  New Gallup poll reveals Cheney is more popular than Pelosi, much in the same way that prostate exams are more popular than colonoscopies    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Music:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Scott Weiland's estranged wife to publish tell-all memoir, marking the first time a heroine will abuse him    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Whitney Houston's new album to hit the streets in September, expected to crack the top 10    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Kelly Clarkson isn't fazed by fat jokes, vegetables    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]


Business:

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  Bausch & Lomb settles 600 eye-fungus lawsuits for $250 million. After attorneys fees are paid, plaintiffs aren't expecting to see much    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  General Motors claims it has 16 potential buyers for Saturn. It is unclear if that's for the actual cars or the brand itself    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]

[image from img1.fark.net too old to be available]  France's unemployment rate at all time high, or as the French call it, "summer vacation"    [image from img.fark.net too old to be available]
· · ·
(view entire blog)


28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2009-06-08 02:54:21 PM  
My personal favorite this week:

New Gallup poll reveals Cheney is more popular than Pelosi, much in the same way that prostate exams are more popular than colonoscopies
 
2009-06-08 02:56:33 PM  
Unfreakable: My personal favorite this week:

You trying to tell us something?
 
2009-06-08 02:57:03 PM  
I kinda like prostate exams.
 
2009-06-08 02:57:34 PM  
I got two headlines this week? Wowser.
 
2009-06-08 02:58:18 PM  
Whamdangler: I kinda like prostate exams.

Well, I like 'em better than I suspect I would like prostate cancer.
 
2009-06-08 02:58:43 PM  
Too many to choose from!

I guess I'll go with Cheney/Pelosi, though.
 
2009-06-08 02:59:51 PM  
Bausch & Lomb settles 600 eye-fungus lawsuits for $250 million. After attorneys fees are paid, plaintiffs aren't expecting to see much

www.coldfusionmuse.com

Pay to the order of...

...Mrs. Wilbur Stark...

...one dollar and nine cents.
 
2009-06-08 03:13:38 PM  
Solid batch of headlines this week.
 
2009-06-08 03:17:37 PM  
Too bad this one didn't get turned loose in the general population:

10 year old girl battles breast cancer, tries to stay perky
 
2009-06-08 03:24:57 PM  
I still love the Osirisly headline. I laughed for a good two minutes at work with that one.
 
2009-06-08 03:31:10 PM  
How I missed the "topless coffee shop burned down due to arson" followup I'll never know. When I read the original story, it was at 3am and I was suffering from insomnia. Part of me at that point was pondering the expenses of driving there just to see the novelty. However, on the other hand, DragonCon has more interesting sights
 
2009-06-08 03:31:53 PM  
My favorite is still the rabbit one. I chortled heartily when I first read it.
 
2009-06-08 03:32:11 PM  
You picked a fine time to leave me loose wheel


Just as the Yankees get their Wang fixed, the Mets break their Putz


Both got good hardy chuckles out of me.
 
2009-06-08 03:35:03 PM  
Oh... and the toner one. Classic. "Will be shaken and re-inserted to work a few more days."
 
2009-06-08 03:35:15 PM  
Cuddling sharks

if thats not a future gorgor pic . I dont know what is
 
2009-06-08 03:37:38 PM  
Unfreakable

just a personal opinion but I really think the "Hung Fu" headline for Carradine should have been greened - wasnt too tasteless. couldve easily made it in this list too
 
2009-06-08 04:03:51 PM  
kevinshields: I still love the Osirisly headline. I laughed for a good two minutes at work with that one.

Thanks.
 
2009-06-08 04:27:39 PM  
at80eighty: just a personal opinion but I really think the "Hung Fu" headline for Carradine should have been greened - wasnt too tasteless. couldve easily made it in this list too

Yeah, I can see that. It's a balancing act sometimes, that one just didn't make it. Made me laugh, though
 
2009-06-08 04:38:10 PM  
at80eighty: Unfreakable

just a personal opinion but I really think the "Hung Fu" headline for Carradine should have been greened - wasnt too tasteless. couldve easily made it in this list too


In retropect, I wish I had submitted a link with headline "Bill Killed"
 
2009-06-08 04:57:21 PM  
Hey, I got another HOTW! The antioxidants in sperm one.

I am now siting back in my chair with smug look on my face.
 
2009-06-08 05:16:17 PM  
ecmoRandomNumbers: My favorite is still the rabbit one. I chortled heartily when I first read it.

Why, thank yuh.
 
2009-06-08 05:18:18 PM  
Unfreakable: My personal favorite this week:

New Gallup poll reveals Cheney is more popular than Pelosi, much in the same way that prostate exams are more popular than colonoscopies


Thanks!
 
2009-06-08 05:19:43 PM  
Shardovan: I am now siting back in my chair with smug look on my face.

Bukkake!

(Rereads post)

Oh -- "smug look" on your face.

Never mind.
 
2009-06-08 05:40:56 PM  
Shardovan: I am now siting back in my chair with smug look on my face.

"Sitting." I am "sitting" in my chair. Not sure how one sites in a chair, anyway.

Dammit.
 
2009-06-08 05:41:32 PM  
I got hosed, I demand a recount
 
2009-06-08 08:10:08 PM  
I guess Drew is to drunk to post.
 
2009-06-08 08:43:59 PM  
Unfreakable: Yeah, I can see that. It's a balancing act sometimes, that one just didn't make it. Made me laugh, though

mcwebe0: In retropect, I wish I had submitted a link with headline "Bill Killed"

Both also quality.
 
2009-06-09 12:58:33 AM  
Some guy in California who had 13 expensive rabbits just reported to police he had 77 rabbits stolen. Thief spotted in truck with 200 rabbits. Police hope to recover the 42,987 rabbits by tomorrow

How'd I miss Bunday?
 
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