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(Yahoo)   It's summer, school is out, and the news cycle has slowed down... send in the sharks   (travel.yahoo.com ) divider line
    More: PSA  
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2022 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Jun 2009 at 6:52 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2009-06-05 06:04:30 PM  
Finally!

Aren't they a little late this year?
 
2009-06-05 06:07:13 PM  
May I remind submitter that it is not technically summer yet and that students in states such as New York are still in school?
 
2009-06-05 06:09:40 PM  
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2009-06-05 06:10:09 PM  

jetzzfan: May I remind submitter that it is not technically summer yet and that students in states such as New York are still in school?


Everyone knows the official start of summer isn't some calendar date, it's when the shark attack stories roll out. So there!
 
2009-06-05 06:12:00 PM  
Hopefully the sharks get the schoolkids bombarding TFD.
 
2009-06-05 06:54:47 PM  
Suck my diiiiiiiiiiiiick!
 
2009-06-05 06:54:48 PM  
Drew's drunken, rambling book is looking more and more like he knows what he's talking about.
 
2009-06-05 06:55:08 PM  
Our shark-attack fears are irrational, she said. "You are more likely to be hit by lightning."

Small consolation for the people who were hit by lightning this week.
 
2009-06-05 06:55:44 PM  
Long Beach Island, N.J.? Seriously? When was the last attack there?
 
2009-06-05 06:56:21 PM  
Candygram.
 
2009-06-05 06:59:05 PM  

phlegmmo: Our shark-attack fears are irrational, she said. "You are more likely to be hit by lightning."

Small consolation for the people who were hit by lightning this week.


or those bonked on the head by coconuts.

/not really (new window)
 
2009-06-05 06:59:15 PM  

sgnilward: Suck my diiiiiiiiiiiiick!


I lol'd
 
2009-06-05 06:59:34 PM  
Flowers.
 
2009-06-05 06:59:53 PM  

phlegmmo: Our shark-attack fears are irrational, she said. "You are more likely to be hit by lightning."

Small consolation for the people who were hit by lightning this week.


Or hit by lightning while being attacked by sharks.
 
2009-06-05 07:00:04 PM  
I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros
Candygram.


funny
 
Al!
2009-06-05 07:04:22 PM  
THIS JUST IN:
From our crack investigative team here at News 43 Albequerque, some sharks are unafraid of people and may, in fact, eat them. EVERYBODY PANIC!!
 
2009-06-05 07:06:13 PM  
Relax everyone. It's only Skoora.
 
Al!
2009-06-05 07:07:35 PM  
Is anyone else interested in the fact that all of the sites are in the US? It couldn't possibly be that attacks are downplayed in other parts of North America.
 
2009-06-05 07:08:55 PM  
slantmouth.com

Sent.
 
2009-06-05 07:11:28 PM  
I'm just a dolphin, ma'am.
 
2009-06-05 07:13:08 PM  
Also, everyone knows that the best shark bite treatment ward is in a hospital in Silver City, New Mexico.

/not so obscure
 
2009-06-05 07:17:06 PM  
Landshark.

Candygram.
 
2009-06-05 07:27:52 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com

If I didn't do it, someone else would, If I didn't do it, someone else would...


/I'd be surprised if that second part isn't obscure..
 
2009-06-05 07:33:44 PM  
FTA: North America's Top Shark-Attack Beaches ... North Shore, Oahu, Hawaii

TFA fails at geography.
 
2009-06-05 07:35:20 PM  
My theory: sharks are nature's garde-fou. They keep stupid people out of the water, thus saving tens of thousands of fools from drowning or getting run over by a motorboat, for every idiot they kill.

Garde-fou. Literallly, "madman guard".

A railing, parapet or barrier designed to keep idiots from killing themselves.

Garde-fou. Your French Word of the Day. And, in my opinion, one of the very best.

I like sharks.

Too bad they're so tasty.
 
2009-06-05 07:42:43 PM  
Only a few species of sharks are dangerous. The rest are completely harmless.

I blame Hollywood (Jaws) for promoting the fearmongering/stereotypical misconceptions towards sharks that has led to them being needlessly hunted to the brink of extinction.
 
2009-06-05 07:45:14 PM  

Al!: Is anyone else interested in the fact that all of the sites are in the US? It couldn't possibly be that attacks are downplayed in other parts of North America.


Considering the only other "parts" of North America is Canadia, it's not surprising or interesting at all.
 
2009-06-05 07:45:53 PM  

Mongo cut wood: I blame Hollywood (Jaws) for promoting the fearmongering/stereotypical misconceptions towards sharks...


Damn anti-semit-

Oh. Nevermind.
 
2009-06-05 07:50:26 PM  
Not that this is anything groundbreaking, but there are fewer than 100 shark 'attacks' every year. 'Attack' is defined as any shark biting a human in any way, and the vast majority are in knee-deep, murky water from 1-3 foot sharks and require a couple of stitches at the most. There are about 4 fatalities worldwide every year, and of those about one was intentional - the shark actually stalked its human prey. The others generally involved humans swimming with sea lions, which frankly is just asking for it.
 
2009-06-05 07:56:56 PM  
i16.photobucket.com

Approves


/can't believe this is the first Jaws reference
 
2009-06-05 08:13:36 PM  
More people are killed annually by vending machines than by shark attacks. Shark attacks are just sexier news wise.
 
2009-06-05 08:21:05 PM  

mjbok: More people are killed annually by vending machines than by shark attacks. Shark attacks are just sexier news wise.


Then it's time to start a news cycle of vending machine attack stories.
 
2009-06-05 09:08:42 PM  

phlegmmo: Our shark-attack fears are irrational, she said. "You are more likely to be hit by lightning."

Small consolation for the people who were hit by lightning this week.


Whats the coont at now? 4? 5?

Thor is in a really pissy mood this week
 
2009-06-05 09:08:56 PM  
Farkitrol can help
www.farkitrol.com
 
2009-06-05 09:16:19 PM  
They're already heeeeeere.
 
2009-06-05 09:50:47 PM  

crypticsatellite: Finally!Aren't they a little late this year?


No kidding. This is a big relief. I was afraid the natural news cycle was totally busted.
 
Al!
2009-06-05 09:55:41 PM  

fendrluvr: Al!: Is anyone else interested in the fact that all of the sites are in the US? It couldn't possibly be that attacks are downplayed in other parts of North America.

Considering the only other "parts" of North America is Canadia, it's not surprising or interesting at all.


Huh? You're either in 3rd grade or you suck(ed) at geography.

"The continent is generally delimited on the southeast by the Darién watershed along the Colombia-Panama border, or at the Panama Canal; according to other sources, its southern limit is the Isthmus of Tehuantepec, Mexico, with Central America tapering and extending southeastward to South America"

"There are numerous islands off the continent's coasts: principally,... the Bahamas, Turks & Caicos, the Greater and Lesser Antilles..."

In fact, there are no fewer than 41 countries in North America, a large number of them being tropical islands with large tourism bases, which could be grieviously damaged by reports of a large number of shark attacks.
 
2009-06-05 09:56:44 PM  

squeez cheez: The others generally involved humans swimming with sea lions, which frankly is just asking for it.


I dive with sea lions all the time but never considered myself "asking" for a shark to show up.

But it would be cool if one did.

Sadly sharks are pretty good at avoiding humans. So much so that the logistics of actually seeing them are pretty involved.
 
2009-06-05 10:09:20 PM  
It's not so much the odds on being attacked as it is the thought of being farking eaten by something. I was snorkling off the coast of this little Central American country, in about 30 feet of water, when one of the girls in the group asked the guide if there were any big sharks out here. He just looked at her and said, "Swallow you whole". She totally freaked and he had to tow her back to the boat. Most of the group went with them, but I stayed with a girl to swim around some more (I was hoping that by impressing her with my manly disregard for physical danger I could get in her pants; didn't work). Anyway, we weren't paying close enough attention, and started getting pulled out beyond the reef/shallow area into some deep, deep water. The sea bottom dropped away very quickly, and for a while we were struggling against the current just to stay put. That's when I got this real funny feeling, and stated to imagine something really big coming up from the depths and taking a bite out of my ass. It was much scarier than narrowly avoiding a car wreck, and I know familiarity breeds contempt, but it just seems like part of it is an instinctual, primal fear of a big animal eating you while you're still alive.
 
2009-06-05 10:29:59 PM  
Don't question the "news cycle" until you can write a coherent sentence yourself, submittard.
 
2009-06-05 10:31:54 PM  

Deacon Blue: It's not so much the odds on being attacked as it is the thought of being farking eaten by something. I was snorkling off the coast of this little Central American country, in about 30 feet of water, when one of the girls in the group asked the guide if there were any big sharks out here. He just looked at her and said, "Swallow you whole". She totally freaked and he had to tow her back to the boat. Most of the group went with them, but I stayed with a girl to swim around some more (I was hoping that by impressing her with my manly disregard for physical danger I could get in her pants; didn't work). Anyway, we weren't paying close enough attention, and started getting pulled out beyond the reef/shallow area into some deep, deep water. The sea bottom dropped away very quickly, and for a while we were struggling against the current just to stay put. That's when I got this real funny feeling, and stated to imagine something really big coming up from the depths and taking a bite out of my ass. It was much scarier than narrowly avoiding a car wreck, and I know familiarity breeds contempt, but it just seems like part of it is an instinctual, primal fear of a big animal eating you while you're still alive.


That's why snorkelers and swimmers get bitten. They are shark chow while splashing on the surface.
 
2009-06-05 10:47:59 PM  
I always start getting worried when shark attack stories start making headlines, as there were a bunch of stories about shark attacks right before 9/11. I'm going to be mildly unnerved for the next week or so now.
 
2009-06-05 11:15:11 PM  
(knock knock)

Candygram.
 
2009-06-05 11:19:46 PM  
Thanks submitter, for ruining the end of my vacation in New Smryna Beach, Florida. As if I wasn't already afraid to get in the water. Damn shark week.
 
2009-06-06 03:07:52 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

live every week like it's shark week
 
2009-06-06 09:28:06 PM  
i96.photobucket.com
/Someone return the bukket!
 
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