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(News.com.au)   Woman run over by steam roller. Its not just for coyotes anymore   (news.com.au) divider line 95
    More: Dumbass  
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11344 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2003 at 12:44 AM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-02-17 09:14:41 PM  
Mrs. Jemimah Butterworth, dead at 42.
 
2003-02-17 09:44:59 PM  
How the fark do you get run over with a steamroller?
Why the fark didn't the asshat running the thing turn it off?
How the fark did they get the body to the morgue?
 
2003-02-17 09:54:55 PM  
On a lighter note... HOOTERS GIRLS ON A STEAM ROLLER!!! BOOBIES!!! WHOOOO HOOOOO!!!
 
2003-02-17 09:55:34 PM  
 
2003-02-17 09:56:23 PM  
DOH! I Suck!
 
2003-02-17 09:58:25 PM  
Alright, Mods please delete all stupid previous posts so I do not look retarded even though I am...
 
2003-02-17 10:14:19 PM  
Aussies in a hurry for their garden mulch.
 
2003-02-17 10:54:26 PM  
Guess that crushed her plans for the rest of the day.
 
2003-02-17 11:15:58 PM  
<IMG SRC="http://www.disneybadguys.com/voices/lloyd.jpg"

This guy knows how she feels.
 
2003-02-17 11:16:43 PM  
Dammit dammit dammit dammit.

I mean this guy:
 
2003-02-18 12:47:55 AM  
 
2003-02-18 12:48:14 AM  
Dammit, beaten to the Who Framed Roger Rabbit joke.

I bet she gets made fun of for being flat-chested, though.
 
2003-02-18 12:48:44 AM  
*austin powers joke*
 
2003-02-18 12:48:47 AM  
That sucks.
 
2003-02-18 12:49:16 AM  
I can't immagine those things move very fast... surely she could have gotten out of the way...

Looking at the other comments on this thread I think I'm going to end up in Hell by association...
 
2003-02-18 12:49:53 AM  
I'm sure we'd know what happened if the article was more than three sentences long.
 
2003-02-18 12:49:53 AM  
Nice article. All of five sentences, maybe?
 
2003-02-18 12:50:02 AM  
Don't these things only move like 1 mi/hr?
 
2003-02-18 12:51:12 AM  
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *gasp for breath* OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *splat*

/obligatory
 
2003-02-18 12:52:05 AM  
guess they need to make up some of those signs

Instead of "Slow children at play"

"Slow Workers ahead"

I have a few of those Slow children at play signs in my neighborhood. I have yet to see a slow child here play.
 
2003-02-18 12:52:48 AM  
I can't imagine that directing traffic is such fascinating work that you wouldn't notice that HUGE MACHINE bearing down on you. yeesh
 
2003-02-18 12:52:57 AM  
At least they don't have to spend all that money on a coffin. They can just slide her into a big FedEx envelope.
 
2003-02-18 12:53:15 AM  
ouch!!
 
2003-02-18 12:54:40 AM  


Death by Steamroller. Man, what a terrible way to go.
 
2003-02-18 12:54:50 AM  
Worked on a road crew as a summer job in high school (Yup, the moron with the STOP/SLOW sign). Rollers (none of them are steam powered anymore) don't have brakes...
 
2003-02-18 12:56:15 AM  
I must say, I have trouble understanding how someone manages to be accidentally crushed by a large, noisy, slow-moving object.
 
2003-02-18 12:56:41 AM  

"It's K-K-K-Ken, c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me! How are you going to c-c-c-catch me, K-K-K-Ken?"


"W-W-W-WANNNNDA ! W-W-W-W-WANNNDA !"


 
2003-02-18 12:58:42 AM  
I must say, I have trouble understanding how someone operating the machine was so damn careless... what a horrible way to go....
 
2003-02-18 12:58:43 AM  
Probably the worst way I can think of to die. Her family should sue.
 
2003-02-18 12:58:53 AM  
Just so you know, I am SO going to hell.

I actually laughed out loud at that headline.

Then again, I am intoxicated....
 
2003-02-18 12:59:17 AM  
traffic director outfit: $25
Just some truck: $10,000
Getting Run Over by a steam roller because you have the reflexes of that old lady from the 'help i've fallen and I Can't Get up' commercial: not a very classy funeral. Also pricless.
 
2003-02-18 12:59:40 AM  
a whole 5 liner dedicated to a woman who is very dead, with little explaination. i hate the press, oh wait, and asshats who run people over with friggen steamrollers!
 
2003-02-18 01:00:59 AM  
Worked on a road crew as a summer job in high school (Yup, the moron with the STOP/SLOW sign). Rollers (none of them are steam powered anymore) don't have brakes...


Well do they have an ON/OFF switch????? Gee whiz. The operator must have been asleep.
 
2003-02-18 01:02:28 AM  
She was pronounced dead. Think they tried to find a pulse?
 
2003-02-18 01:03:07 AM  
-I'm going to hell for this one.-

When they got to the morgue the door was locked. So they slid her under the door.
(/gets comfy in hand basket)

 
2003-02-18 01:03:52 AM  
Hm...next terrorist attack, a whole bunch of steamrollers running amok over the countryside.
Naah...probably not...
 
2003-02-18 01:04:23 AM  
They've got forward/reverse/neutral gearshifts. You're right - the guy driving must've been asleep (or massively stoned - very likely, in my experience).
 
2003-02-18 01:05:06 AM  
Hmmm... until iknow the circumstances i dont feel comfortable calling her a dumbass. She might have fallen over and been knocked out or something. I guess there is no way to know that.
 
2003-02-18 01:05:12 AM  
02-18-03 12:49:16 AM SpaceCoyote
I can't immagine those things move very fast... surely she could have gotten out of the way...


We had a Roger Rabbit reference before an Austin Powers reference? Props to you guys. Good memory.

I'll up the ante with a recent but maybe obscure Malcom in the Middle reference (do farkers ever watch this show?). I don't know about you guys, but I wouldn't mind renting a steamroller to run shiat over with for a while.
 
2003-02-18 01:07:13 AM  
Wow. That headline is both funny and insensitive at the same time.
 
2003-02-18 01:07:41 AM  
that story really sucks ass, no detail. i'm suprised they mentioned it was a woman
 
2003-02-18 01:08:02 AM  
Photoshop - rice out this funky roller...

 
2003-02-18 01:08:25 AM  
I wonder how big the obligatory chalk outline they drew in the road was.
 
2003-02-18 01:08:49 AM  
Christ, and I thought that criminal dog article was long....
 
2003-02-18 01:08:50 AM  
Semi-gross steamroller accident pic:
http://www.safteng.net/Accident%20Photos/Steam%20Roller%20Accident.htm
 
2003-02-18 01:10:12 AM  
Making fun of someone run over by a piece of heavy machinery is one of the reasons I don't like people, not that I would run over them. Unless I saw my husband leaving a hotel with another woman while driving my Mercedes, if I was a woman which in fact I am not, I would not run over my husband, if I were in fact driving a Mercedes which goes much faster than a large "steam" roller. By the way, Bush sucks, but I digress.
 
Kat [TotalFark]
2003-02-18 01:10:51 AM  
Not a glamourous way to die...
 
2003-02-18 01:11:20 AM  
confirm dead? wtf was there to confirm LOL
 
2003-02-18 01:11:49 AM  
You wanna roll back and start that one again? I got lost after "fun"...
 
2003-02-18 01:12:18 AM  
ElwoodCuse I got the ref (actually briefly did a GIS for a screenshot). That show is possibly the only network show, other than the Simpsons and SNL I watch.
 
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