Since everyone liked it last week, here's today's Media Hype Power Rankings. If it stays popular, we may make this a regular feature. I tried to find 10 items to rank but since MSM had the day off yesterday, there hasn't been a lot of coverage on anything. So this week, eight is enough.

1. North Korea: Global Attention Whore
North Korea got tired of everyone ignoring it, so it went and set off another nuclear test this weekend. It followed that up with a missile launch. Be interesting to see if China puts its foot down on these shenanigans. North Korea always seems to act up when it wants more foreign aid. The problem with letting them do this is theyre behaving like a 2 year-old child if you let them get away with something theyll keep on pushing. Someone needs to smack these guys down, because in the long run this story ends with these morans having a full blown nuclear arsenal with ICBMs capable of hitting New York.

2. New Supreme Court Nominee
There shouldnt be a peep about this anywhere by next week, unless it turns out that this appointee owes some back taxes just like everyone else the Obama administration picks for positions. By the way, does the Obama Administration do anything without leaking it to the press 24 hours early? Thats a rhetorical question by the way, the answer is no. If youve never noticed this before, keep an eye out.

3. California rules on gay marriage
Expect the usual suspects from both sides to complain about the results, however they end up. For people who dont live in California, heres a short explanation: California screwed itself royally years ago by allowing popular referendums (which cant be overturned by government) on everything under the sun. Last November, one of the referendums was on gay marriage. It didnt pass. The California Supreme Court is ruling today on whether or not banning gay marriage is even constitutional. If this confuses you, dont worry. Its politics.

4. Bad economy
Hey the economy sucks, didn't know if you noticed. Variations on people losing houses, jobs, etc. abound. This inevitably floats toward the top unless something pushes it back down. Latest blip: housing prices slide 20%. In related news, if you want a house in Detroit all you have to do is move into a vacant one and its yours. Youll have to kick out the meth lab folks first though. Also, this just in: oil is expensive.

5. GM going bankrupt
Opinions differ as to the impact on the US economy when this happens. Media musings always talk about the potential GM bankruptcy but cmon, this thing is over and done already. The groundwork was laid in January to prepare the market so the shock wouldnt be huge when it finally hit.

6. Twitter navelgazing
Hey theres going to be a Twitter TV show. The details of which are so vague I cant even write a summary about it. It involves Twitter somehow. This is really just a PR pitch by the guys trying to sell the show to a network. MSM, hook, line, sinker, etc.

7. Death of newspapers
The latest iteration of this: newspapers making rumblings about making all news subscriber-based. News media claiming that giving away the news is whats killing it. Nevermind the fact that subscription revenues barely cover printing costs the bulk of media income comes from advertising. Wait, that would mean that bad ad sales are really at fault here. Dont hold your breath waiting for that in-depth analysis. You wont see it, no one wants to go there. Much the same as how your local paper wont go hard after local car dealerships that take out full page ads in the sports section.

8. Swine Flu
Latest update: 5 more people died from the swine flu. Additionally, the US government has ponied up $190 million for vaccinations. Thats about $1.9 million for every person whos died so far. Meanwhile, 400 people died from the regular flu since Friday.


Off the list from last week:

LA Earthquake
Pirates (aww)
Miss California
Slumdog Kid's House
Tamil Tigers killed


Up and coming:

Shark attacks
Where the hell are the shark attacks? I think they got pushed back on the schedule by Swine Flu

Firework articles
Expect a combination of fireworks safety articles along with stories of mishaps as rednecks everywhere (including myself) combine alcohol with explosives.

Traffic on the 4th of July
Hey! Theres going to be traffic on the 4th of July! This has never happened before.


And now, Fark.com's best Headlines of the Week:

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2009-05-17 to Sat 2009-05-23:

  IRS issues scam alert. Warns taxpayers about schemes to get your money and send it overseas, or to people who didn't earn it, or to pay off other pyramid schemes...hey, wait a minute    

  Quadruple amputee settles lawsuit. High five    

  The Pope encourages young people to use the internet, but says they have to use the same computer for the rest of their lives and they'll go to hell if they use any anti-virus software    

  54 B.C. passport applications lost. Surely they're expired by now    

  Police find missing 555-lb teenager by looking in any direction    

  Math teacher dismayed to discover she can't get 17 into 37 more than twice  

  Strong quake shakes Mexico City. Ay, Carrumble    

  Someone steals hood of van. Police suspect hoodlums    

  Machete fight breaks out between rival gangs of karaoke singers. Local hospital treating injured confirms "They will survive, they will survive, hey hey"    

  Researcher whose work led to the development of Viagra has passed away. Funeral home struggles with pesky coffin lid    

  Honolulu's Internet vote is first in nation, says mayor-elect Rick Astley    


Sports:

  New York Mets lose after baserunner misses third base and defense makes five errors, expect to lose sponsorship from Chico's Bail Bonds    

  Brett Favre will not have sugrey on his injrued amr aftre all    

  Police search for missing 75 year-old basketball player, call up the New York Knicks to see if they signed him    


Geek:

  Canadians to build largest optical telescope in the world, capable of looking 6,000 years back into the past when the universe was created (pics)    

  Scientists create realistic soccer-playing robots. Bonus: video shows exactly one kick and the robots falling over 14 times, making it extremely lifelike    

  A wood powered pickup truck gets 5,000 mile per cord. Oak, spruce or ash, nobody rides for free    


Showbiz:

  Steven Spielberg signs on to direct Martin Luther King, Jr. biopic. James Earl Ray's rifle to be replaced with walkie-talkie    

  Gay sex movie from China causes controversy at Cannes, not that there's anything Wong with that    

  "My Name is Earl" to be picked up by TBS, will promptly be renamed "Tyler Perry's 'My Name is Tyler' starring Tyler Perry"    


Politics:

  Bill Clinton to be named special UN envoy to Haiti. Presumably, Hillary wanted him sent somewhere he'd be deathly afraid to have sex with anyone    

  Congressman Steven LaTourette addresses Rahm Emanuel as "motherf*cker" at public banquet. If only there were some sort of medical syndrome that could explain such an inappropriate burst of profanity    

  Bush says cleaning up his dog's droppings is a sobering reminder that he's no longer president. Obama says cleaning up the Bush administration's droppings is a sobering reminder that he is    


Music:

  Police arrests at Springsteen concert include 30 for underage drinking. In other news, at least 30 people under age 50 attended last night's Springsteen concert    

  Jarvis Cocker says Pulp will never reunite. He said this in a supermarket - I don't know why but he had to say it somewhere, so he said it there    

  Philip Glass discusses his music. Philip Glass discusses his music. Philip Glass discusses his music. Philip Glass discusses his music. Philip Glass discusses his music. Philip Glass discusses his music    


Business:

  American Express to 4000 employees: "Don't leave home"    

  Target profit beats estimates on news that people are still willing to pay 20% more than Walmart for the same stuff on clean floors    

  HP profit drops; 6,400 workers to get the boot (6,218 after formatting)    
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