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(Some Guy)   Man agrees to settle $100 debt with another by letting him have sex with his girlfriend, doesn't bother to clear the new payment plan with her   (insidebayarea.com) divider line 88
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23364 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 May 2009 at 9:28 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-05-02 08:18:17 AM
Not that there is anything wrong with that.

//I think my standard reply database is corrupt.
 
2009-05-02 08:23:14 AM
Earlier in the day, Bileci had borrowed $100 from Williams and promised to repay him later that night, Special Victims Unit Officers Ross Tisdell and Cynthia Espinoza said. What he used the money for is not known.

The only way this story could get even more asinine is if it was for an engagement ring...
 
2009-05-02 08:31:35 AM
I've heard this joke.
 
2009-05-02 08:40:17 AM
i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2009-05-02 08:50:46 AM
This works better if you're identical twins.
 
2009-05-02 09:00:41 AM
Raiders fans, no doubt.
 
2009-05-02 09:04:27 AM
towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.
 
2009-05-02 09:04:32 AM
towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Well, he's already charged with rape.

Bileci is charged with "in concert" counts of rape, two counts of oral copulation, sodomy and four other counts of pandering.
 
2009-05-02 09:22:42 AM
The Aristocrats!

/Obvious reply is obvious
 
2009-05-02 09:35:28 AM
Thankfully, this article has no pictures of the people involved.
 
2009-05-02 09:36:35 AM
Picture of culprit:
i232.photobucket.com

"I wasn't selling her body for sex, I was renting out her sexual organs on a one use basis!"
 
2009-05-02 09:37:03 AM
Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.


Those (sodomy laws) were struck down by the SCOTUS. i think they can only be used in rape cases. IANAL (hurrrr) but that is what i seem to recall.
 
2009-05-02 09:38:34 AM
towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

How 'bout oral surprise.
 
2009-05-02 09:40:07 AM
FTFA: For at least a half-hour he sexually assaulted her while Bileci sat in a chair "and did nothing," Tisdell said

Wow. Pfft, what an ass.
 
2009-05-02 09:40:12 AM
Rape, oral copulation, and sodomy with four pandas?


www.jaunted.com
 
2009-05-02 09:40:23 AM
Dad?
 
2009-05-02 09:43:09 AM

And since their was interest on the loan, the loanshark was allowed to fark the man's dog as well.


Only in Oakland. I hope this doesn't give Al Davis any ideas about how he's going to compensate his draft picks.

 
2009-05-02 09:45:02 AM
If you ask me, that was an indecent proposal.
 
2009-05-02 09:46:09 AM
Ms.Maus: Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.

Those (sodomy laws) were struck down by the SCOTUS. i think they can only be used in rape cases. IANAL (hurrrr) but that is what i seem to recall.


Ignore Kyosuke -- he is literally more stupid than the chair you're sitting on at this very moment and would do us all a favor if he stopped using his allotment of oxygen and left it for someone with a chance of sentience.

California has no statute against oral copulation between consenting adults. What these guys were doubtless charged with was oral copulation with a person not consenting because s/he was unconscious, a violation of section 288a of the California Penal code.
 
2009-05-02 09:46:10 AM
Too bad we don't know what she looks like. But any girl that would hang with the likes of these two is probably skanky anyway.
 
2009-05-02 09:47:36 AM
Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.


Yeah, that's it exactly. This guy didn't do anything wrong!
 
2009-05-02 09:47:56 AM
Sooprise buttsecks!
 
2009-05-02 09:48:34 AM
ima turkey: Too bad we don't know what she looks like. But any girl that would hang with the likes of these two is probably skanky anyway.

They live in a hotel. In Oakland. We all know what they look like.
 
2009-05-02 09:49:45 AM
Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.


Yeah but... all sodomy laws have been declared invalid, wtf.
 
2009-05-02 09:51:04 AM
Kar98: Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.

Yeah but... all sodomy laws have been declared invalid, wtf.


Just like the republicans who made those laws?

Sorry, obvious troll is obvious and all.
 
2009-05-02 09:51:07 AM
Manfred J. Hattan: Ignore Kyosuke -- he is literally more stupid than the chair you're sitting on at this very moment and would do us all a favor if he stopped using his allotment of oxygen and left it for someone with a chance of sentience.

Never mind then.
 
2009-05-02 09:51:36 AM
In his defence, the man is an investment banker ...
 
2009-05-02 09:52:44 AM
Kyosuke: Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.

Your village called, their idiot is missing...
 
2009-05-02 09:54:29 AM
Earlier in the day, Bileci had borrowed $100 from Williams and promised to repay him later that night, Special Victims Unit Officers said. What he used the money for is not known.

I'll give you three guesses...this can't be too difficult. :-|
 
2009-05-02 09:56:09 AM
CaffietineFiend: Earlier in the day, Bileci had borrowed $100 from Williams and promised to repay him later that night, Special Victims Unit Officers said. What he used the money for is not known.

I'll give you three guesses...this can't be too difficult. :-|


Hmm, meth, crack, or those fabulous fark me pumps that were just his size on display in the store window...
 
2009-05-02 09:56:28 AM
Manfred J. Hattan:
California has no statute against oral copulation between consenting adults. What these guys were doubtless charged with was oral copulation with a person not consenting because s/he was unconscious, a violation of section 288a of the California Penal code.


woo, my internet law degree is paying off! :P

thanks!
 
2009-05-02 09:57:53 AM
thisdistractedglobe.com
sometimes a brotha just needs a microphone.
 
2009-05-02 09:58:29 AM
Daffydil: Kyosuke: Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.

Your village called, their idiot is missing...


and the bridge is undertrolled.
 
2009-05-02 09:58:46 AM
Ms.Maus: Manfred J. Hattan:
California has no statute against oral copulation between consenting adults. What these guys were doubtless charged with was oral copulation with a person not consenting because s/he was unconscious, a violation of section 288a of the California Penal code.

woo, my internet law degree is paying off! :P

thanks!


Huh huh huh he said "penal" huh huh huh.

Sorry, channeled Beavis and Butthead for a moment there.
 
2009-05-02 10:01:49 AM
http://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&q=1400+Jefferson+Street+,+Oakland+CA&um=1&ie=U TF-8&split=0&gl=us&ei=slH8ScroDoLItgeXjq2SDA&sa=X&oi=geocode_result&ct=title&res num=1

That's location, dawgs!
 
2009-05-02 10:05:01 AM
Veteran of the Cola Wars: Huh huh huh he said "penal" huh huh huh.

Heh. I thought exactly that and almost typed it.
 
2009-05-02 10:09:56 AM
Manfred J. Hattan: What these guys were doubtless charged with was oral copulation with a person not consenting because s/he was unconscious, a violation of section 288a of the California Penal code.

You said, "Penal." Heh.

"Forced oral sodomy" sounds at first blush like an exciting adventure, but I could see it ending badly unless one had the forethought to bring the appropriate safety gear.
 
2009-05-02 10:14:13 AM
Veteran of the Cola Wars:
Sorry, channeled Beavis and Butthead for a moment there.


s'okay, i did it when i typed 'IANAL.'

/frooooog baaaasebaaaall
 
2009-05-02 10:15:24 AM
ShannonKW: Manfred J. Hattan: What these guys were doubtless charged with was oral copulation with a person not consenting because s/he was unconscious, a violation of section 288a of the California Penal code.

You said, "Penal." Heh.

"Forced oral sodomy" sounds at first blush like an exciting adventure, but I could see it ending badly unless one had the forethought to bring the appropriate safety gear.


Forced oral sodomy...

So the guy was using his girl as an 'ATM' machine?

/What is this handbasket and why is it getting hotter?
 
2009-05-02 10:21:46 AM
Hahahaha I've done that!
 
2009-05-02 10:22:51 AM
That panda pic made me think this:
www.mccoy.net.au

/Clicked the link thinking it must be FL... discovered it was California's very own little Florida, Oakland.
//use to live in Hayward - hey, it was marginally better than Oakland
 
2009-05-02 10:26:38 AM
she was sexually assaulted for at least a half-hour...

Williams is charged with two counts of rape, four counts of oral copulation and two counts of sodomy.


Two rapes, four BJs and twice up the pooper in the space of half an hour? That must be some kind of record.
 
2009-05-02 10:27:54 AM
Williams is charged with two counts of rape, four counts of oral copulation and two counts of sodomy.

All that in half an hour?

He works fast...
 
2009-05-02 10:31:28 AM
I would very much like to personally tie both of these guys to a post naked and fire a high powered pellet gun at their genitals for 8 hours straight, before cutting them off with a plastic cafeteria knife.
 
2009-05-02 10:31:34 AM
2 counts oral, 4 counts sodomy? In what order?

www.venicewebstudio.com

"You NEVER go ass to mouth!"

If you pull all the way out and go back in, is that considered another count? or is there like a 5 minute time period?
 
2009-05-02 10:38:10 AM
i46.photobucket.com

He got bad advice from his friend...
 
2009-05-02 10:40:09 AM
Ms.Maus: Kyosuke: towi: i find it interesting that they're being charged with "oral copulation" and not something like "forced oral copulation" or i dunno... "oral assault"

Sodomy laws. If it's something Republicans enjoy so much they are ashamed, they outlaw it.

Those (sodomy laws) were struck down by the SCOTUS. i think they can only be used in rape cases. IANAL (hurrrr) but that is what i seem to recall.


Not exactly. I remember that came up in our state, and the Michigan Supreme Court ruled that although a sodomy statute would be unconstitutional if applied in an adult consensual relationship, in a rape case, it's not. So the defendant was convicted of rape and one count of crimes against nature or something like that. I don't have a cite because it's Saturday, and I'm too lazy to look it up. But the theory is that a criminal doesn't have standing to argue Lawrence v Texas in a non consensual relationship. And no, it's not double jeopardy to charge someone with rape and sodomy for the same act. That's the blockburger test. Link (new window)
 
2009-05-02 10:55:13 AM
I don't understand how you can force someone to orally copulate with you. If someone doesn't want to open their mouth, it's darn hard to make them, and if somehow you get your pee pee inside their mouth, they will just bite it off, right??
 
2009-05-02 11:04:40 AM
Noble Drusus: I don't understand how you can force someone to orally copulate with you. If someone doesn't want to open their mouth, it's darn hard to make them, and if somehow you get your pee pee inside their mouth, they will just bite it off, right??

"suck my dick or i'm going to slit your farking throat, fark your neck stump, and throw you in the river."

"Would you like deep throat with that, sir?"
 
2009-05-02 11:08:26 AM
The man & woman had lived together for 6 years. This is just bizarre. Wrong way to initiate a breakup.
 
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