We really need a Japan tag. We're starting to get more links a day from the Mainchi Daily News than we EVER got from Cosmiverse.

Cool. Kick their butts and sit on them.

The Thong Squad.

And you thought the "hundred-hand slap" was for killing kittens.

What a crock of bullshiat.

Meh, unfetchable image. Try this one instead.

did you guys see the side?

Stuffing hits the fan in Hello Kitty spatter.....i don't know...made me laugh

uhm.. the thieve can outrun any sumo wrestlers before he can even sit on them! duh!

So they'll be walking around blowing their whistles. Sounds really effective.

Finally the everpresent fear of sumo wrestlers all over the world is being put to use...

as long as the thief can walk faster than a big old fattie in a diaper, i think they're pretty safe.

Well, on the bright side of things, the donut shops will be happier and the nickname "pig" will have more meaning than ever.

I wouldn't cross anyone of them...they train by hitting large blocks of wood...

When I (gasp) (pant) catch you, I
WILL kick your ass! Or squash it. Whatever.
(manboobs!)(thongs!)

sometimes I hate not paying more attention to the tags I use

OK, seriously, the best sumos are athletes and celebs over there, like Konishiki here (if it loads)

hahaha
jiggly manboobs of goodness
*flap! flap!*

Hmmm...yokozuna or yakuza...which will win?

two Isenoumi grapplers will walk the streets of the districts near the stable each night for about one hour beginning at midnight.

NOTE TO SELF:
Wait until 1 am to commit crime.

Hey hippos can outrun people and gore them to death. Moral? Don't screw with giant stuff.

So basically the people patroling the streets will now be just as fat as American cops. But more in shape to fight.

E. Honda wins.

I really, really have nothing

Sadly, Isenoumi Stablemaster Fujinokawa has reported that their star crime fighter is currently having health problems...

Sumo - The New Guardian Angel

Yea, but what will it cost the cops to feed them?

sta·ble

A group, as of athletes or entertainers, under common management: a stable of prizefighters.

All neighborhoods should have a Sumo Stable!

They do run pretty fast at eachother on the mat...

Anti_Freak_Machine

lol... not to worry. i have sugar in my urine.

Weezer should get working on Hash Pipe 2...

"hefty help will not only thin out the ranks of criminals, but also swell the number of fans of the ancient sport."

hehe
/punny

Yes, a sumo wrestler's training house is called a stable.
(suits, since some of these guys can outmass horses...)

What's really odd: a country full of small people would have, for centuries, a sport that values the largest of the large. I find it intriguing.

As noted, these guys aren't built for pursuit. Although, if we could do the same with our football players...that would be something else. Break into a house, and Terry Tate pounds you into the pavement. "I don't think that belongs to you, MITCH!"

So how fast can a sumo wrestler run?
Do their legs do most of the work, or do they just lean forwards and let gravity take hold in the ring?



Anyway, you mean we don't already have sumo crimefighters? :)

Damn that cartoon was hard to find. On the journey I found that fox kids now sucks 100% pure refined ass (there's not a single watchable cartoon on there), and cartoon network probably has 90% of all goodness. how the heck can they fit it in? (captain planet and thundercats even. i reckon no gadget or cities of gold only because of licensing issues)

I don't know....... could be intimidating walking home at midnight and having a morbidly obese man in a thong, with tits that sag lower than my grandmother's, blowing a whistle in your face.

values the largest of the large. I find it intriguing.

i find it describing bill clinton's dating technique.

They may not be able to run super-fast, but if they do catch you- just the thought of some 400lb monster dropping on you or even worse deciding your skinny butt looks kinda cute- AAARGH!

Actualy, boys, if you knew that a 500 pound sumo wrester was out on the streets, and ready to squish you, would you try anything?

Yikes!

If you get cornered by one of these guys...it's all over.