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(Denver Channel)   Bicycle boxing is the newest fad for criminal teenagers   ( divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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15506 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Feb 2003 at 10:56 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

162 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-02-07 08:43:19 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 09:12:12 AM  
Shouldn't it be called "bicycle baseball?"
2003-02-07 09:16:05 AM  
Can't 17-year olds just stay home and play video games, like I used to?
2003-02-07 09:24:13 AM  
Before reading the story, I had a vision of kids working at Colorado Cyclist and boxing bicycles for UPS. This is way different.

Authorities said a 17-year-old boy has been charged with second-degree assault, reckless endangerment and underage consumption of alcohol. He will appear court on Feb. 21.

How 'bout we give him a bicycle and chase after him in a jeep? See how he likes it.
2003-02-07 10:32:53 AM  
How about they just take the dirtbag out the back of the police station and beat him senseless with a baseball bat? Oh right, that would be cruel.
2003-02-07 10:50:35 AM  
Bring back the draft!
2003-02-07 11:01:16 AM  
This is a very funny past-time that I think we have all played at some time or other. We used to call it 'tit cricket' or 'tit baseball' - get a cricket/baseball pat and smack women in the toots as you drive past. Score is based on size of tittage, whether you hit one or both of them, etc. 3 strikes and you're out!
2003-02-07 11:01:23 AM  
So, mailboxes weren't good enough fer ya? Ya young whippersnapper.
buz [BareFark]
2003-02-07 11:01:29 AM  
Maybe we should dare them to play chicken with a van full of Judo masters?
2003-02-07 11:01:47 AM  
apparently this kid couldn't afford a paintball gun.
2003-02-07 11:01:57 AM  
He will appear court on Feb. 21.

Glad they proofread these things.
2003-02-07 11:02:10 AM  
2003-02-07 11:03:52 AM  
This might actually be cool if it involved two people trying to punch each other while riding bicycles and wearing boxing gloves
2003-02-07 11:04:51 AM  
Things like this make me feel old. I mean, I remember when throwing eggs out the car window at unsuspecting targets was all the thrill. Or aiming for puddles at crowded bus stops. That sort of thing.
2003-02-07 11:05:33 AM  

Maybe I should feel sorry for the people getting
hit, but the kid who came up with that idea
has a futuristic genius.

"Hey guys I have this great idea..."
2003-02-07 11:05:38 AM  
Oh man when I was in high school we used to get on bicycles and fire at each other with roman candles. Completely sober. No seriously we were. Ok maybe we had a little something.

good times good times
2003-02-07 11:06:23 AM  
As I am an avid bicyclist-fighter, I am overjoyed to see my two greatest passions joined in one. I predict the new wave of the future right here....

Up next, segway drive-bys....
2003-02-07 11:07:42 AM  
Hang 'em.
2003-02-07 11:07:54 AM  
Yeah, I pictured two people on bikes, jousting style.
2003-02-07 11:08:57 AM  
Scooters Union raises terror level to red.
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 11:09:19 AM  
yeah, I see a reference to mailbox baseball. I did that once, but we discovered amuch funner game which didn't destroy property and run the risk of getting SERIOUSLY busted. Remember when the 20oz sodas came out and they were in glass bottles.

1. Hold bottle out drivers side window.
2. See upcoming sign.
3. Throw over car towards sign.
4. Miss horribly.
5. Laugh hysterically.
6. Smoke another bowl? Quite possibly.

If you ever actually hit them, you were so surprised. BTW, before anyone gives me crap, this was in the country. No one was injured.
2003-02-07 11:11:03 AM  
This is why it should be legal to preemptively beat teenagers senseless.
2003-02-07 11:11:03 AM  
That's why I ride a Cannondale mountain bike. Wranglers can't fit on the trails where I ride. (I've tried.)
2003-02-07 11:11:23 AM  
They should let every victim line up and take a few whacks at him with a bat!
2003-02-07 11:11:45 AM  
they should give the people they hit the baseball bats
2003-02-07 11:11:53 AM  
Who hasn't thrown stuff from a car window or smacked a few people as they drove by??? This is just honest fun, these are good kids and they should be left alone.
2003-02-07 11:12:12 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 11:12:29 AM  
These kids ... just make it faaaar too easy.

Imagine: you catch one of them - then you'll be holding an ass-punk in one hand, and an aluminum baseball bat in the other ... it will take you no creativity whatsoever to figure out what to do next.

"Brace yourself now ... *dang* ... I'm sure it'll fit ... eventually ..."
2003-02-07 11:14:02 AM  
Geez. I blame the liberal Hollywood media and video games. It's obvious this country is going to hell in a handbasket because of continued desensitization to violence, and this is just another example of it. Poor terrorized bikers. These evil, mischievous kids should be home watching Punky Brewster or Diff'rent Stokes. Or at the very worst, what's wrong with some good old-fashioned cow-tipping?
I don't really have a point, I'm just wasting space.
2003-02-07 11:16:08 AM  
I see a future of ass-boxing prison.
2003-02-07 11:16:50 AM  
Another amusing action: Dooring bicyclists(best if you know them).

Just pull up slowly behind them,then as you pass, open the car door and smack 'em in the arse. Good comedy to see a friend go tumbling off the side of the road.

And yes, I laugh out loud when I see a pedestrian fall on their face. You just can't make better comedy.
2003-02-07 11:16:56 AM  
If a motorist harrasses me while I'm riding my bike, I simply note the details (make, model, license number), stop my bike, and call the police on the cell phone to calmly report a suspected DUI.

Then said kids get to have fun explaining to mom what happened.
2003-02-07 11:18:52 AM  
we need Cliff Yablonskis opinion on this matter
2003-02-07 11:19:11 AM  
2003-02-07 11:19:34 AM  
We used to play ice hockey on bicycles.
Sort of a polo/hockey/smasho-chango each other's body game.

good times...
2003-02-07 11:19:56 AM  
Ah, yes the good ol' "It's funny 'cuz it's not me."

[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 11:20:07 AM  
when we were young (real young, like 1st or 2nd grade), all the neighborhood kids who had BigWheels (or the cheap knockoff variations thereof) would gather on a sidestreet for a modified "demolition derby"

The kid who had the "Green Machine" was the biggest target...
2003-02-07 11:20:20 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

I luv bicycle boxing!
2003-02-07 11:21:52 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 11:22:34 AM  
We used to throw water balloons at people from my car and yell "Catch!". In retrospect, it was probably a pretty stupid thing to do, especially since I was the only person in town with a car that looked like this:
2003-02-07 11:24:15 AM  
Ant - wow. An invisible car. I am mucho impressed!

2003-02-07 11:26:19 AM  
Second degree assault. Fvck that, that's attempted murder. Do you know how much force is generated by swinging a metal bat from a vehicle going about 30 mph? That's fvcked up.
2003-02-07 11:27:49 AM  
I would like to introduce them to "bicycle shoot your ass with my ruger .357"
2003-02-07 11:29:40 AM  
Bicyclists really piss me off and I wish they would keep their skrawny granola-eating hippie asses on the bike trail, but hitting people with bats is just plain F|_|CKED
2003-02-07 11:30:31 AM  
Ant: that's the impression I had. Kind of a modern day jousting match. But then I read the article. This kid should be dragged to a dark alleyway and beaten with a bat (or crowbar), until he decides to find a better pass-time.
2003-02-07 11:30:38 AM  
Damn it!
like this:
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-07 11:32:16 AM  
Spoonfed - why exactly is it that bicyclists ppiss you off. Give me a reason and I'll give you 10 reasons why you should give them your total respect.
2003-02-07 11:33:15 AM  
attempted murder. nice.
2003-02-07 11:33:25 AM  
I hate them bike riding phags as well, but a bat is a little over kill.

I mean the bike guys shiould get on the sidewalk, they are not a car. And why do they all have to wear these giant helmets for protection, but nothing but latex paint on the rest of their bodies?

Do we really need to see the rings of your anus bike boy?
2003-02-07 11:34:07 AM  
Nice car Starsky, or are you Hutch?
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