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(SFGate)   Helicopter pilot who was filmed receiving a "sex act" from a porn star while flying cannot get his license back. In his defense, it is called the "cockpit" for a reason   (sfgate.com) divider line 111
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21404 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Apr 2009 at 7:06 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2009-04-07 06:41:40 PM
He should have used the "I was deflating" affirmative defense.
 
2009-04-07 06:48:39 PM
And just because people will want to know, yes, there are pictures (NSFW new window).

Puma Swede is her name. Never heard of her.
 
2009-04-07 06:49:07 PM
The judge watched the unedited tape in chambers and took testimony before his decision

so basically, the judge spent some quality time alone watching porn? And got paid to do this?!

I might have to reconsider my choice of careers....
 
2009-04-07 07:02:29 PM
Hender

That photoshoot manages to straddle the fine line between a "sex act" and passenger side airbags going off.
 
2009-04-07 07:08:32 PM
Damned prudes.
 
2009-04-07 07:10:29 PM
Who gave the traffic report while he was "busy"?
 
2009-04-07 07:11:06 PM
The cockpit? What is it?
 
2009-04-07 07:11:17 PM
Now imagine if some astronauts did this while steering towards atmosphere re-entry...
 
2009-04-07 07:11:25 PM
i thought "the helicopter" was a sex act
 
2009-04-07 07:11:43 PM
My most vivid recollection of said video was when the "starlet" remarks "That's fast!" after our pilot friend ended up pulling the eject lever after a few seconds.
 
2009-04-07 07:11:47 PM
The judge watched the unedited tape in chambers and took testimony whacked off before his decision.
 
2009-04-07 07:12:11 PM
McDougal: Who gave the traffic report while he was "busy"?

Pretty sure it wasn't his mouth that was full.
 
2009-04-07 07:12:45 PM
That shiat was all over TMZ. Because he not only did it, he bragged about it and let TMZ have the tape. The guy isn't even smart enough to be driving a car.
 
2009-04-07 07:14:33 PM
No Hero tag?
 
2009-04-07 07:14:33 PM
wingnutx: The cockpit? What is it?

It's a movie quote, but that's not important right now.*

*-Kyosuke, two threads down. Used without permission.
 
2009-04-07 07:15:51 PM
and here I am getting a HJ from a bum on the street... I guess being a postman doesn't really have any perks compared to being a helicopter pilot.
 
2009-04-07 07:16:05 PM
I like sex and I like pornstars but I support the judges decision. Flying a helicopter is a hell of a lot more complicated than driving a car. And the picture that Hender provided show a seriously dangerous situation. If the pilot had kept his focus on the instruments while letting the lady do her thing, than maybe it would have been acceptable. But that pilot took averted his attention from his instruments and his surroundings to focus on her boobs. He's an idiot, and he shouldn't be allowed to fly.
 
2009-04-07 07:16:26 PM
Weaver95: so basically, the judge spent some quality time alone watching porn? And got paid to do this?! I might have to reconsider my choice of careers....

The downside is you don't get to pick the porn. You could also be obligated to watch ATM camera footage of two drunk homeless guys giving each other BJs. Then again, what's a turn-off for me could be a fringe benefit for someone else.
 
2009-04-07 07:19:00 PM
Cockpit, eh?

What do you call it when there is a woman pilot?

The box office. The answer is the box office.
 
2009-04-07 07:19:51 PM
ha! woman pilot! i get it!
 
2009-04-07 07:22:55 PM
Blhack: Cockpit, eh?

What do you call it when there is a woman pilot?

The box office. The answer is the box office.


you gotta stay with the aeronautical terms. That's the black box they're always talking about.
 
2009-04-07 07:23:27 PM
Hender: And just because people will want to know, yes, there are pictures (NSFW new window).

Puma Swede is her name. Never heard of her.


It just shows, breastfeeding should not be allowed in helicopters. I don't care how hungry the pilot is, he should have thought ahead and brought some milk in a sippy cup.
 
2009-04-07 07:25:09 PM
Hender: And just because people will want to know, yes, there are pictures (NSFW new window).

Puma Swede is her name. Never heard of her.


I have.

/combs palms
 
2009-04-07 07:25:32 PM
Inibrius: Blhack: Cockpit, eh?

What do you call it when there is a woman pilot?

The box office. The answer is the box office.

you gotta stay with the aeronautical terms. That's the black box they're always talking about.


The ass?.
 
2009-04-07 07:26:32 PM
This is why video cameras have an off switch.

/dumb ass.
 
2009-04-07 07:29:21 PM
The article needs some correction...

"The judge watched then rewound, fast forwarded to the good part, and watched the unedited tape again, then rewound and watch the money shot in slow motion in chambers and took testimony before his decision."

FTFY
 
2009-04-07 07:32:00 PM
I know it's probably a fairly safe assumption on my part, but helicopters don't have a handy autopilot feature like fixed wing aircraft that he coulda engaged before he became otherwise occupied, do they?

/the non-inflatable kind
 
2009-04-07 07:34:08 PM
Weaver95: The judge watched the unedited tape in chambers and took testimony before his decision

so basically, the judge spent some quality time alone watching porn? And got paid to do this?!

I might have to reconsider my choice of careers....


I somehow doubt that the one in a million porn star would mitigate all of the awful things that judge probably has to look at
 
gft
2009-04-07 07:34:26 PM
Lucky Arnie Pie ...
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2009-04-07 07:36:40 PM
Everybody including whomever was holding the video camera deserved a Darwin Award.
 
2009-04-07 07:39:38 PM
Small Tracts of Land: Weaver95: The judge watched the unedited tape in chambers and took testimony before his decision

so basically, the judge spent some quality time alone watching porn? And got paid to do this?!

I might have to reconsider my choice of careers....

I somehow doubt that the one in a million porn star would mitigate all of the awful things that judge probably has to look at


But they certianly make the gig less bitter.
 
2009-04-07 07:39:38 PM
Hender: And just because people will want to know, yes, there are pictures (NSFW new window).

Puma Swede is her name. Never heard of her.


you need to get out more...
 
2009-04-07 07:40:25 PM
Fart_Machine: Everybody including whomever was holding the video camera deserved a Darwin Award.

yeah, you can't reproduce by oral sex

darwin wins!

is that not what you meant?
 
2009-04-07 07:40:26 PM
An airline pilot is doing the standard announcements "We'll be flying at 30,000 ft., etc". When he's finished, he forgets to turn off the intercom, and he tells the Co-pilot that he could go for a hot coffee, and a blow job. A stewardess rushes toward the cockpit from the back of the plane to tell the pilot that the intercom is on, and a passenger yells "Hey hun, don't forget the coffee!".
 
2009-04-07 07:40:53 PM
Atomic Spunk: I like sex and I like pornstars but I support the judges decision. Flying a helicopter is a hell of a lot more complicated than driving a car. And the picture that Hender provided show a seriously dangerous situation. If the pilot had kept his focus on the instruments while letting the lady do her thing, than maybe it would have been acceptable. But that pilot took averted his attention from his instruments and his surroundings to focus on her boobs. He's an idiot, and he shouldn't be allowed to fly.

Yeah, all kidding aside, I wouldn't want this dumbass flying over my head.
 
2009-04-07 07:41:12 PM
At least he didn't attempt the "auto-rotation" manuver... Of course, swedish women aren't known for being spinners.
 
2009-04-07 07:41:52 PM
I think the fact that the pilot busted a nut in 47 seconds on the video, is more embarrassing than losing his license. I'm sure it swayed the judge's decision as well. I mean, how lame.

img22.imageshack.us

And now that he's out of work as a pilot, he obviously can't get a fallback job in porn with skills like that. Double lame!
 
2009-04-07 07:42:54 PM
Maybe I should have worded that differently, hmmmm.
 
2009-04-07 07:43:14 PM
Cockpit? (NSFW language)
 
2009-04-07 07:43:36 PM
Notice the pilot was wearing a wedding ring? That must have been a fun conversation.
 
2009-04-07 07:45:43 PM
okaykleek: wingnutx: The cockpit? What is it?

It's a movie quote, but that's not important right now.*

*-Kyosuke, two threads down. Used without permission.


Surely, you must be joking
 
2009-04-07 07:46:37 PM
It's not like there are a bunch of things to run into in the sky...Maybe they should take away drivers licenses for this type of offense and make them near impossible to get back.
 
2009-04-07 07:47:27 PM
Similar, but a lot less painful than Island of the Sequined Love Nun by Christopher Moore - hilarious book....
 
2009-04-07 07:50:22 PM
Did he grease her rotors?
 
2009-04-07 07:55:17 PM
WFern: Did he grease her rotors?

he descended into the bad bush and landed his marines in her drop zone
 
2009-04-07 07:59:17 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com


//link's HOT
 
2009-04-07 08:02:14 PM
Better pic of the lady involved:

upload.wikimedia.org

I'd dead stick her.
 
2009-04-07 08:04:35 PM
Hoarf: Cockpit? (NSFW language)

WIN!
 
2009-04-07 08:05:52 PM
I think he'll also be shocked to learn that you're not supposed to poop on the poop deck...
 
2009-04-07 08:08:07 PM
FunkOut: Hender: And just because people will want to know, yes, there are pictures (NSFW new window).

Puma Swede is her name. Never heard of her.

It just shows, breastfeeding should not be allowed in helicopters. I don't care how hungry the pilot is, he should have thought ahead and brought some milk in a sippy cup.


I LOL'D!!!!
 
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