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(Jalopnik)   Will I have to put the IKEA concept car together myself?   (jalopnik.com) divider line 77
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22126 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Mar 2009 at 12:10 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



77 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2009-03-23 10:58:06 AM
April Fool's Day jokes are starting early this year, aren't they?
 
2009-03-23 11:13:48 AM
DetroitWonk: April Fool's Day jokes are starting early this year, aren't they?

Eh, Google introduced Gmail on April 1.
 
2009-03-23 11:32:55 AM
Hender: DetroitWonk: April Fool's Day jokes are starting early this year, aren't they?

Eh, Google introduced Gmail on April 1.


Good point. In that case, I hope they ship the car in a flat package like they ship everything else.
 
2009-03-23 11:37:19 AM
Peter Leko is a chess master. Chess is played with chess pieces. Car comes in pieces. Leko ;)
 
2009-03-23 11:44:57 AM
Does it come with the Allen wrench?
 
2009-03-23 11:53:17 AM
Yes, but it will come with horribly written instructions, all the tools you need and maybe all the hardware. At least you have that goes for you.
 
2009-03-23 12:14:16 PM
labman: Does it come with the Allen wrench?

this
 
2009-03-23 12:15:53 PM
Does it come with free meatballs? This is important.
 
2009-03-23 12:15:59 PM
ManateeGag: Yes, but it will come with horribly writtendrawn instructions, all the tools you need except a hammer and a blade or Philips screwdriver and maybe all the hardware. At least you have that goes for you.

And if you do everything absolutely perfectly, it will look rather nice for a week until you brush by it the wrong way and damage the corner.
 
2009-03-23 12:16:00 PM
img401.imageshack.us

"Enjoy your affordable Swedish crap."
 
2009-03-23 12:16:22 PM
ManateeGag: Yes, but it will come with horribly written instructions, all the tools you need and maybe all the hardware. At least you have that goes for you.

And a whole gallon of cheap white glue for the little pegs that never quite fit right.
 
2009-03-23 12:17:03 PM
www.geekologie.com

www.geekologie.com

www.geekologie.com
 
2009-03-23 12:18:05 PM
Yes. And whatever you do, do not lose the little Allen Wrench.

www.esolids.com

Or you'll be sorrrr-reeee.
 
2009-03-23 12:18:07 PM
IKEA Concept Car A Bad Swedish Joke?

Sell it cheap at first, Denmark it up.
 
2009-03-23 12:19:31 PM
Yes it comes in a flat pack, but how do I get it home?

/recently purchased a Verner and two Billys (I don't know how to pluralize Swedish words.)
 
2009-03-23 12:20:58 PM
phlegmmo: Sell it cheap at first, Denmark it up.

Hey-ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
 
2009-03-23 12:21:37 PM
We're introduced to the car by it's designer Christophe Grozs, the car's supposed designer...

/department of redundancy department
 
2009-03-23 12:21:40 PM
If you can't assemble something from Ikea then you probably should avoid tools. It is ridiculously easy.
 
2009-03-23 12:22:12 PM
Pxtl: ManateeGag: Yes, but it will come with horribly writtendrawn instructions, all the tools you need except a hammer and a blade or Philips screwdriver and maybe all the hardware. At least you have that goes for you.

And if you do everything absolutely perfectly, it will look rather nice for a week until you brush by it the wrong way and damage the corner.


Scotch tape works great for an invisible repair.

LOL
 
2009-03-23 12:22:13 PM
H_is_for_Hereticimages of tent in paris

Looks cool, but I'd like to remind the audience that people piss on the streets in Paris (hint: ever see hoses running water down the gutters of the streets in the morning? Now you know why...).

Maybe if that tent had a floor or something... :-)
 
2009-03-23 12:23:39 PM
I'm still waiting for the Adobe.


/obscure?
 
2009-03-23 12:26:36 PM
Worker bees can leave. Even drones can fly away. The Queen is their slave.
 
2009-03-23 12:26:50 PM
Noah's Arcade: I'm still waiting for the Adobe.


/obscure?


4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2009-03-23 12:28:45 PM
Noah's Arcade: I'm still waiting for the Adobe.

/obscure?


Spokesman: These days, everyone's talking about the Hyundai, and the Yugo. Both nice cars, if you've got $3,000 or $4,000 to throw around. But, for those of us whose name doesn't happen to be Rockefeller, finally there's some good news - a car with a sticker price of $179. That's right, $179. The name of the car?

Adobe. The sassy new Mexican import that's made out of clay. German engineering and Mexican know-how helped create the first car to break the $200 barrier. At this price, you might not expect more than reliable transportation - but, brother, you get it! Extra features: like the custom contour seats, or the beverage-gripping dash. And the money you save isn't exactly small change!

Jingle:
"Hey, hey, we're Adobe!
The little car that's made out of clay!
We're gonna save you some money
that you can spend in some other way!
Hey, hey, we're Adobe!
Hey, hey, we're Adobe!
Adobe!"

[ show Adobe driver get into a fender-bender. She casually steps out of the vehicle and uses her hands to mold her bumper back into its proper shape, in under six minutes! ]

Spokesman: Adobe. You can buy a cheaper car. But I wouldn't recommend it!

Announcer: Not approved for street use in some states. No warranty either expressed or implied. All sales final.


/nothing is obscure on yadda yadda...
 
2009-03-23 12:28:57 PM
Noah's Arcade: I'm still waiting for the Adobe.


/obscure?



This is FARK...nothing is obscure!
Link (new window)
 
2009-03-23 12:29:44 PM
Dammit I should have refreshed
 
2009-03-23 12:33:42 PM
www.popstarsplus.com

Representative of WWF France had no comment.
 
2009-03-23 12:35:00 PM
You guys f*cking rule.
 
2009-03-23 12:35:48 PM
Rapmaster2000: If you can't assemble something from Ikea then you probably should avoid tools. It is ridiculously easy.

Sometimes you get lucky and it all works. Sometimes you don't and it doesn't quite fit together. But that's why God invented the hammer.
 
2009-03-23 12:36:29 PM
We're introduced to the car by it's designer Christophe Grozs, the car's supposed designer


Anagrams for Christophe Grozs contain the word scherzo and scherzi.

Wiki: Scherzo (plural scherzi) is a piece of music or a movement, in a certain style, that forms part of a larger piece such as a symphony. The word "scherzo" means "joke" in Italian. Sometimes the word scherzando (joking) is used in musical notation to indicate that a passage should be executed in a playful manner.

/watches too much Lost.
 
2009-03-23 12:39:15 PM
pix.motivatedphotos.com

pix.motivatedphotos.com

 
2009-03-23 12:40:44 PM
DrForrester: Noah's Arcade: I'm still waiting for the Adobe.


/obscure?


that's a LeCar, not much better than made of adobe
 
2009-03-23 12:42:28 PM
I hope it's a racecar bed.
 
2009-03-23 12:48:11 PM
poisson d'Avril
 
2009-03-23 12:49:10 PM
I know this is a joke, but along with that Nike car from a previous PS contest it does raise an interesting question. Who will the new automakers be?
If US automakers go bust someone is going to have to step up and start producing to fill the void left by Ford, GM etc.

/can't wait for April 1st
//always a fun time with the filters around here
 
2009-03-23 12:53:12 PM
H_is_for_Heretic

Awesome! Source please?
 
2009-03-23 12:56:16 PM
radio_silence: I hope it's a racecar bed.

that way you can lie in frontwards or backwards
 
2009-03-23 01:00:36 PM
will I have to track the parts to assemble it at the store?

hoods aisle 19 shelf c, fenders aisle 60 shelf d
 
2009-03-23 01:04:15 PM
It's a clown car, not a vagina

/wait...
 
2009-03-23 01:06:13 PM
Ikea France has a press release talking about it. WWF France has absolutely nothing in their press releases about it.

I smell a fish. A veritable poisson d'avril.
 
2009-03-23 01:07:35 PM
www.leblogauto.com

(Not mine - credit goes to Wimbledon from VWVortex.)
 
2009-03-23 01:08:05 PM
I can't believe I'm the first one in with this:

i621.photobucket.com
 
2009-03-23 01:08:51 PM
improvius: (Not mine - credit goes to Wimbledon from VWVortex.)

Well, mine's not hotlinked.

/tiny fist
 
2009-03-23 01:10:58 PM
I'm leaning on an Ikea desk right now so I'm really...

My Ikea furniture survived even my asshat ex's teenage son. That's impressive.

/want
//can assemble, no problem
 
2009-03-23 01:11:55 PM
And yes, I know it's an April Fool's joke. Want anyway.
 
2009-03-23 01:16:12 PM
i39.tinypic.com
 
2009-03-23 01:21:03 PM
www.davejenkins.com

I don't like anyone touching my stuff!!! Any of you touch my stuff... ikea.
 
2009-03-23 01:25:54 PM
What are these extra parts?
 
2009-03-23 01:29:19 PM
ineedanap: Bob Ondeeznuts: phlegmmo: Sell it cheap at first, Denmark it up.

Hey-ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!


http://instantrimshot.com/


i am sending this thread to my friend.

she is an ikea fanatic. for years she was begging me to go. she got off on me buying something there. we live in NYC and last year went to the one in Brooklyn. I live in Queens

i bought a $100 dresser (really nice and sturdy). but that box was heavy as shiat. we had to carry it through the 3 line, the 7, on a bus. And right in the middle of Grand Central, the box just tore. so all the pieces were everywhere. i was halfway between crying hysterically and screaming. she goes out to buy packing tape, but it took a while to find. so im just sitting there, sad.

and we had to stop every 10 steps to breathe bc it was so heavy.

at one point though, it got narrow so i had to carry the whole thing.

the picture of that guy miserable was me. she made me save it.

i cut out that part, hung it up and wrote NEVER FORGET on it.

still have it.
 
2009-03-23 01:31:36 PM
It`s pretty obvious that they will unveil a "car" driven by four sets of of chains and pedals, a tandem-car if you will.
Can`t imagine that the WWF would put their name on anything less lame than that. And it fits the profile of Swedish humour.

Gonna bet 100 Nostradamus points on that, and Ill eat a live baby panda wrapped in the Swedish flag if Im wrong.
 
2009-03-23 01:36:36 PM
"We're introduced to the car by it's designer Christophe Grozs, the car's supposed designer"

The Redundant Department of Redundancy called... yada yada

/also, "its" not "it's"
//grammar nazi
 
2009-03-23 01:38:26 PM
stuffy: What are these extra parts?

Those are option parts required by the TÜV if you're going to drive the car in Germany. Otherwise they're not needed.

..But those two are vital parts of the CV joints, without them you front wheels will (Clunk-CRASH) ...fall off.
 
2009-03-23 01:45:06 PM
bsteele: radio_silence: I hope it's a racecar bed.

that way you can lie in frontwards or backwards


img340.imageshack.us
 
2009-03-23 01:50:39 PM
Well, if you were to put it together with an allen wrench, that puts it higher than a Lotus. >_>


/go go fiberglass and epoxy
//which is why they farking disintegrate when you wreck them
 
2009-03-23 01:51:03 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

Approves of the headline.
 
2009-03-23 01:51:16 PM
What, the Volvo 245 not boxy enough?
 
2009-03-23 01:58:51 PM
I wonder what unpronounceable name they are going to give it, the Klapfglug?
 
2009-03-23 01:59:25 PM
probesport:
I don't like anyone touching my stuff!!! Any of you touch my stuff... ikea.

Lighten up, Ingmar.
 
2009-03-23 02:04:55 PM
img11.imageshack.us
 
2009-03-23 02:14:37 PM
i163.photobucket.com

Like everyone else, I had become a
slave to the IKEA nesting instinct.
If I saw something like clever coffee
table sin the shape of a yin and yang,
I had to have it. I would flip through
catalogs and wonder, "What kind of dining
set defines me as a person?" We used to
read pornography. Now it was the Horchow
Collection. I had it all. Even the glass
dishes with tiny bubbles and imperfections,
proof they were crafted by the honest,
simple, hard-working indigenous peoples of
wherever."
 
2009-03-23 02:20:33 PM
tehotherbilly: I know this is a joke, but along with that Nike car from a previous PS contest it does raise an interesting question. Who will the new automakers be?
If US automakers go bust someone is going to have to step up and start producing to fill the void left by Ford, GM etc.

/can't wait for April 1st
//always a fun time with the filters around here


Ummm.... You mean like Toyota, Honda, Nissan, and Mitsubishi? You know, the companies that can actually produce a quality car.
 
2009-03-23 03:08:12 PM
Daroc: tehotherbilly: I know this is a joke, but along with that Nike car from a previous PS contest it does raise an interesting question. Who will the new automakers be?
If US automakers go bust someone is going to have to step up and start producing to fill the void left by Ford, GM etc.

/can't wait for April 1st
//always a fun time with the filters around here

Ummm.... You mean like Toyota, Honda, Nissan, and Mitsubishi? You know, the companies that can actually produce a quality car.


Ummm.... all four of those companies are having problems. Mitsubishi is even considering getting out of the passenger car business altogether.
 
2009-03-23 03:23:02 PM
Yeah, right. Like we'll ever actually see an IKEA car.
(IKEA, Swedish for "Out of Stock")
 
2009-03-23 03:25:54 PM
i48.photobucket.com
"Did you know IKEA sells 17 kinds of home shelving. I can only pronounce 2 of them though..."

"It never fits together" = "I'm to stupid to understand instructions"
"It's so difficult to put together" = "I have no patience"
"There's always pieces missing." = "Those tiny bits are difficult to keep track of"
"But there is a lot of these screws I don't need" = "I misunderstood the instructions.

It's like furniture and an IQ-test at the same time...

/Swedish - Getting a kick out of... etc.
 
2009-03-23 03:33:20 PM
DrForrester: Noah's Arcade: I'm still waiting for the Adobe.


/obscure?


I'd rather drive a Chameleon XLE
 
2009-03-23 03:40:39 PM
RandomSwede: It's like furniture and an IQ-test at the same time...

About 5 years ago there must've been a real slip in quality control, because I was getting a lot of utter crap. Things with the holes drilled on the wrong side (necessitating packing all the crap back into the car and driving back to Ikea), metal screws that broke when tightened, etc. Not "I farked up" but "hey, do you still have the barcode from that? We think the whole shipment is screwed up like this".
 
2009-03-23 04:38:52 PM
Daroc: Ummm.... You mean like Toyota, Honda, Nissan, and Mitsubishi? You know, the companies that can actually produce a quality car.

Umm, yeah, show me a 41 year old Japanese car that still is on the road.
www.arkansascamaro.com
Hot like my own, just a little cleaner.
Bite me rice burner lover.
 
2009-03-23 04:41:25 PM
The car's somnabatchin' designer.

1.bp.blogspot.com

/He was deported to Sweden.
//Fargin' iceholes
 
2009-03-23 04:46:56 PM
interluder: Umm, yeah, show me a 41 year old Japanese car that still is on the road.

Link (new window)

Ok, it's only 39, but close enough.
 
2009-03-23 04:57:39 PM
Savage Belief: interluder: Umm, yeah, show me a 41 year old Japanese car that still is on the road.

Link (new window)

Ok, it's only 39, but close enough.


So... you link to a Japanese car with an American engine?

I'm so confused.
 
2009-03-23 04:58:55 PM
Savage Belief: interluder: Umm, yeah, show me a 41 year old Japanese car that still is on the road.

Link (new window)

Ok, it's only 39, but close enough.

With a Chevy engine.
Thanks for proving my point.
 
2009-03-23 05:55:38 PM
As an adult who buys furniture fully assembled (and made of solid wood), I mock you children who have to put your own furniture together and still fail miserably at it.
 
2009-03-23 06:05:06 PM
interluder
Umm, yeah, show me a 41 year old Japanese car that still is on the road.
Hot like my own, just a little cleaner.
Bite me rice burner lover.


Perhaps you can clear something up for me, as I'm not what one would call a gearhead. Don't many cars from that era that are now being driven around have to be rebuilt first? By this I mean replacing a large number of parts and doing a complete overhaul on the vehicle? I think the reason you don't see many imports from that era on the road is because they were initially designed and sold to people who wanted a vehicle for transportation, not recreation. You mainly get rebuilt cars from enthusiasts who focus on the hobby aspect.

Besides, I understand that Daroc was referring more to the recent generations of cars (within the last two decades, perhaps) that have shown a disparity in efficiency and reliability between the American and import vehicles.
 
2009-03-23 06:37:34 PM
Play the Ikea game with a car.

Link (new window)
 
2009-03-23 08:37:42 PM
labman: Does it come with the Allen wrench?

I don't need the allen wrench; I've got a toolbox full of them!

The funny thing is Tata has been talking about flat-packing the Nano for shipping and having it partially assembled by its dealers or a third party.
 
2009-03-23 10:33:18 PM
I have an '86 Volvo 244, and so far I've not managed to destroy it...no idea the miles on it. its said 145,xxx since I got it, so apparently the odometer hasn't worked in some time. I will say, it is pretty much an IKEA car...all the corners are smashed in from bumping it into stuff in transit, it comes apart in sections that can be replaced, and the instructions are a disaster.


on a side note to those who were arguing earlier, I've got two American cars that are over 40 years old that haven't been rebuilt and still run/drive usefully. So, yes, they can last that long. But, in the defence of the Japanese cars, I do know of a couple that are over 20 years old and still going, but none around the 40 year old mark - but then I don't think there were many sold here until at least the mid 70s.

#1 - 1968 Plymouth Valiant, slant six engine. 362,000 miles. Still going with little work done outside of regular maintenance up until around 357,000 miles, then I had to rebuild the engine. Still...357k. Thats a lot.

#2 - 1961 Plymouth Fury, but its only got 73,000 on it. All original, runs and drives, but I will admit the floorpans are about rusted to death.
 
2009-03-24 09:51:00 AM
The Icelander: As an adult who buys furniture fully assembled (and made of solid wood), I mock you children who have to put your own furniture together and still fail miserably at it.

Meh, I use both. IKEA is good for storage and all, but fancy show stuff in the house, yeah, we buy real hardwood furniture for that
/still kicking ourselves for buying that computer desk from officemax!
 
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