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(Mainichi Daily News)   Teacher caught pinching the deity of cereals   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
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12512 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Feb 2003 at 11:03 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

51 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-02-04 11:05:16 AM  
damn teachers
2003-02-04 11:06:07 AM  
The deity of cerals is surely the King of Kings!

2003-02-04 11:06:22 AM  
They're always after me rucky charms.

</lacist joke>
2003-02-04 11:06:32 AM  
I believe Dumbass would be an equally valid tag for this.
2003-02-04 11:06:43 AM  
I thought Cap'n Crunch was the deity of cereals.
2003-02-04 11:06:44 AM  
2003-02-04 11:07:18 AM  
Oh, Mainchi News. That's credible.
2003-02-04 11:10:13 AM  
A is for arrested, J is for jail
p a
p c
l k
e s
2003-02-04 11:10:28 AM  
Riced out diety of Type-R cereal?
2003-02-04 11:11:56 AM  
Grivas, you are going to hell, directly to hell, do not collect $200, do not pass go.
But I'm right behind you, so ROCK ON!
2003-02-04 11:12:37 AM  
This is embarrassing to all Americans! This teacher(?) just doesn't get it.

Americans either:
a) Buy it.
b) Bomb the hell out of the country and then take it.

Stealing it is so 3rd World.
2003-02-04 11:14:22 AM  
I thought Cap'n Crunch was the deity of cereals.

Count Chocula certainly outranks Cap'n Crunch! Geez.
2003-02-04 11:15:09 AM  
I read something about 2 foxes being taken. Is Tatu alright??
2003-02-04 11:15:59 AM  
Betcha her lawyer will use the insanity defense for her; she wasn't responsible because she was coo coo for Coa Coa Puffs.
2003-02-04 11:17:22 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
Great, now everyone's gonna be cutting their toungues on Frosted Flakes...
2003-02-04 11:17:51 AM  
This teacher has done it before, a serial cereal pincher.

2003-02-04 11:20:26 AM  
Yeah Ill take a box 'o fox and two slices of toast.
2003-02-04 11:21:18 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-04 11:24:34 AM  
I thought Cap'n Crunch was the deity of cereals.

Count Chocula certainly outranks Cap'n Crunch! Geez.

Yes, but Super Sugar Bear out-pimps'em both....
2003-02-04 11:24:39 AM that the Quisp character??
2003-02-04 11:30:57 AM  
Yep. Quisp & Quake - the breakfast bookends of my childhood.

Somewhat related question: how come whenever you eat sugar smacks, later on - your pee smells just like it?
2003-02-04 11:31:58 AM  
I've seen people praying to the porcelein god before, but it was a rounder shape than a fox.
2003-02-04 11:41:00 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
The Goddess Ceres is not amused!
2003-02-04 11:54:07 AM  
snap, crackle, pop, lice cwispies
2003-02-04 12:19:27 PM  
Damn, there is a god like entity that represents cereal? When did that happen? Where is the deity of toilet paper or the tooth pick? WTF...
2003-02-04 12:25:51 PM  
There can be only one:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-04 12:34:33 PM  
They'll shoot her out of a cannon for punishment.
2003-02-04 12:36:04 PM  
Mmmmm, Inari
[image from too old to be available]
2003-02-04 12:39:10 PM  
"Pinching"? Poorly chosen verb choice for the headline in the original article, repeated here to provide misleading and salacious draw.

I was expecting to read that someone grabbed the ass of the lucky charms dwarf. Imagine my let down to read that this is only about some bozo stealing some statues, in some foreign country no less. On the scale of things I couldn't care less about about, this would rank up there with the fat kid that (badly) sang "Like a Virgin" on American Idol.
2003-02-04 12:42:59 PM  
Ok what I want to know is there some other meaning for cereal here? I mean I know everyone thinks of the breakfast food, but what does it mean in this case?
2003-02-04 01:04:08 PM  
dookster - how about "bogarting"?
2003-02-04 01:12:38 PM  
Stupid farking media, Inari is the goddess of rice and GRAINS (thus cereal contains grain). As for lucky charms, that marshmellow stuff, that must be some other god.. maybe Drew is god of marshmellows.
2003-02-04 01:17:03 PM  
02-04-03 12:42:59 PM Rasputin
Ok what I want to know is there some other meaning for cereal here? I mean I know everyone thinks of the breakfast food, but what does it mean in this case?

Most polytheistic cultures have one or more deities of fertility and/or grain harvest.

Rome - Ceres
Greece - Demeter
Slavic - Makosh
Viking - Freya
Aztec - Tlazolteotl
Egypt - many, including Osiris, Bastet, Min
2003-02-04 01:17:11 PM  
Ant..stop're making me hungry!!
2003-02-04 01:26:19 PM  
I hope he at least said "hey baby" just before pinching statues of foxes.

/read the article but chose to misunderstand it and make a lame joke anyway
2003-02-04 01:34:07 PM  
Japan has foxes?!
2003-02-04 01:34:39 PM  
The two best cereals, hands down, are Golden Grahms and Boo Berry. End of debate.
2003-02-04 01:37:52 PM  
mmm... inari...
2003-02-04 01:45:11 PM  
man, if anybody steals MY Inari Vachs, there's gonna be trouble.
2003-02-04 01:45:30 PM  
unless "pinching the deity of cereals" is slang for some new Japanese sexual fetish, it doesn't really interest me
2003-02-04 01:52:13 PM  
Farking Americans. Stealing other peoples cereal. Man, next thing you know, you will want to be the "Savior" of the world and invade southeast asian countries. Oh, wait....
2003-02-04 01:57:00 PM  
Wilford Brimley?
2003-02-04 02:09:50 PM  
We've had our crash course in ancient religions (thank you Nagasaki), now for one in linguistics.

Like many words used today, using "cereal" to refer to the breakfast foods named above is misleading. "Cereal" refers to any grain or grain product. Note the image of Ceres posted by Diogenes (from whose name we get the word "cereal"), and the sheaves of wheat she has in her arm and the bucket near her throne. The type of corn used to make Corn Flakes is also considered a cereal. As is rice, even though rice is usually prepared by boiling instead of by baking. (if you follow the link to that I placed above, you will see that it refers to wheat, corn, etc. as the edible fruit of a grass. Yes, wheat, oats, rye, barley, corn, and other grains are giant grasses.) When Corn Flakes, etc. were first invented, they were marketed as a "breakfast cereal"--quite accurate, although the same name could be applied to toast, as bread is also made of cereals. Over time and popular use, it took the definition we now think of, see def. 3 above.
2003-02-04 02:22:42 PM  
Oh yeah, but for stealing stuff from shrines...

guh, Americans.

How would she like it if a Japanese tourist started nabbing crucifixes off the wall of her church back home?

Anti-Freak-Machine: if Japan doesn't have foxes, somebody had better tell them that. Foxes show up a lot in their mythology, and in their popular entertainment. Ah but, so do giant mecha.
2003-02-04 02:33:59 PM  
I think that someone should beat this person with a retard stick for what they have done. That wasn't exactly the most brilliant idea that I've ever heard of, and what exactly were they going to do with the statues when they finally got enough of them? Fedex them to their friends? I'm sure the government over there wouldn't appreciate that at all.
2003-02-04 02:48:03 PM  
All right, I guess "King Vitaman" rules as far as cereal goes, unless someone can find a "Master of the Universe Cereal"?????
2003-02-04 02:50:04 PM  
Woo -- call for a JAPAN tag!
2003-02-04 03:14:15 PM  
There should either be a "Japan" tag or a "Mainichi" tag, considering everything about Japan filters down to us through Mainichi.
2003-02-04 07:19:41 PM  
Teacher caught
pinching a loaf...
2003-02-04 08:57:25 PM  
The sad part is some of you had to look up what a cereal is and most of you still don't know.
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