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(Cleveland Plain Dealer)   70-year-old woman fights off four home invaders with her favorite sauce pan. "He looked at me and said, 'Lady, why did you do that?' And I hit him again."   ( blog.cleveland.com) divider line
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12645 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Feb 2009 at 4:52 PM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



104 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2009-02-25 02:44:57 PM  
This is the kind of person we need more of in this country.
 
2009-02-25 02:47:19 PM  
FTA: "I picked up the saucepan and smacked him right on the head," she said. "He looked at me and said, 'Lady, why did you do that?' And I hit him again."

Farkin' aye... this played out more like a sitcom than a robbery.
 
2009-02-25 02:48:08 PM  
"Anyone who can pick up a frying pan owns death." - William S. Burroughs.
 
2009-02-25 02:51:07 PM  
"One of them picked up my purse and just dumped it out," she said Wednesday. "Now, my purse is like Fibber McGee's closet, it's got everything in there. I got very angry."

I love the "old-people-beat-the-crap-out-of-robbers" stories.

It amuses me when some moron tries to mug an old guy only to find out the hard way that he's an ex-Navy seal, it tickles me when someone tries to carjack a grandmother only to find that she keeps a billy club in the car, and it lightens my heart when four teenagers try to break into an old lady's house only to find that she can make a weapon out of a frying pan.
 
2009-02-25 02:53:46 PM  
This story makes me happy all around.

Later, they realized that they had hired one of the suspects to shovel their driveway several weeks ago.

"My wife gave them a big tip, so they thought we had money," he said. "It's sad when that's what you get for trying to help someone.


Sounds like she was cooking up a nice pan of karma.
 
2009-02-25 02:54:58 PM  
She's lucky one of them didn't have a gun.
 
2009-02-25 02:57:50 PM  
The link in the story to the YouTube clip is why I love the internet :)
 
2009-02-25 02:59:08 PM  
Let's see one of you young homos do that with a plastic microwave pot!!
 
2009-02-25 02:59:21 PM  
"We got there about 12 minutes later and my wife was standing on the front lawn with police. She was upset that she had to turn over her favorite saucepan as evidence."

I adore this woman.
 
2009-02-25 03:03:51 PM  
"She did all the things I told her never to do in that kind of situation," he said. "We've been married 47 years and she raised our five sons. She's not afraid of anything."

Tough old broad.

I say that with reverence.
 
2009-02-25 03:12:30 PM  
Later, they realized that they had hired one of the suspects to shovel their driveway several weeks ago.

"My wife gave them a big tip, so they thought we had money," he said. "It's sad when that's what you get for trying to help someone."


I hope that sauce pan was cast iron.
 
2009-02-25 03:16:47 PM  

what_now: I love the "old-people-beat-the-crap-out-of-robbers" stories.


Hell yeah. I generally assume that by the time somebody reaches the age of 70, they've probably dealt with worse than me....
 
2009-02-25 03:18:25 PM  

RoxtarRyan: "He looked at me and said, 'Lady, why did you do that?' And I hit him again."


Yeah, that's my favorite part. Kid gets one whack for breaking in, and a second well-deserved whack for being stupid.
 
2009-02-25 03:23:38 PM  

BobtheFascist: I hope that sauce pan was cast iron.


Yes like this fry/sauce pan:

i221.photobucket.com
15-1/4" dia., and probably weights 20 pounds


/my best friend got my wife this for a wedding present
 
2009-02-25 03:43:54 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: Yes like this fry/sauce pan:
/my best friend got my wife this for a wedding present


1)...Your friend may be trying to tell your wife something. Has there been a life insurance policy taken in your name recently?

2) Perhaps he scrambled her eggs?

3) Tell her to GTF back into the kitchen and not burn the chicken.
 
2009-02-25 04:00:45 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: Yes like this fry/sauce pan:


I think I have that one too. Heavy as a motherfarker and could easily kill a man.
 
2009-02-25 04:11:34 PM  
Yang's wife?

/obscure
 
2009-02-25 04:38:18 PM  

RoxtarRyan: 1)...Your friend may be trying to tell your wife something. Has there been a life insurance policy taken in your name recently?

2) Perhaps he scrambled her eggs?

3) Tell her to GTF back into the kitchen and not burn the chicken.


4) TO keep me in line.
/I do all the cooking
 
2009-02-25 04:56:05 PM  
"I picked up the saucepan and smacked him right on the head," she said


BAM!
 
2009-02-25 04:56:37 PM  
LOL
BAM! thanks Emeril.
 
2009-02-25 04:57:00 PM  
Dammit it cut off part of it and ruined my already terrible joke. :(

"Before she even gave much thought about what she should do, she grabbed an Emeril Lagasse 5-quart sauce pan."
 
2009-02-25 04:57:21 PM  

NittLion78: Yang's wife?

/obscure


Nothing is obscure on fark!

...these onions make me cry
 
2009-02-25 04:57:29 PM  
Get off her lawn
 
2009-02-25 04:58:25 PM  

Isotope: RoxtarRyan: "He looked at me and said, 'Lady, why did you do that?' And I hit him again."

Yeah, that's my favorite part. Kid gets one whack for breaking in, and a second well-deserved whack for being stupid.


This.
 
2009-02-25 04:59:33 PM  
I don't get the Fibber McGee reference even after looking it up. Thanks, ma'am, you just made this 32 year old feel like a whipper snapper!

/staying off of her lawn.
 
2009-02-25 04:59:38 PM  
I want to be just like that when I get old. Spitfire.
 
2009-02-25 04:59:48 PM  
see, that guys reaction is what is wrong with the world today. Gee I don't know dude, why did she hit you with a frying pan? Because you broke into her house and tried to rob her! farking idiot
 
2009-02-25 04:59:48 PM  

asmodeusazarak: NittLion78: Yang's wife?

/obscure

Nothing is obscure on fark!

...these onions make me cry


The onions with the skin, alright this is making you cry making me cry. Alright life's hard enough as it is. You don't wanna cry anymore.

/Slap Chop
 
2009-02-25 04:59:53 PM  
Sounds like a Bugs Bunny cartoon
 
2009-02-25 05:00:34 PM  
This is very sad. Had both the lady and the robbers had a gun, the outcome would have turned out better for everyone.

/quit trampling on my right to give your entire drugged up neighbors some guns.
 
2009-02-25 05:00:50 PM  

NittLion78: Yang's wife?

/obscure


You spoony bard!
 
2009-02-25 05:01:24 PM  
tvmedia.ign.com
 
2009-02-25 05:02:22 PM  

Isotope: RoxtarRyan: "He looked at me and said, 'Lady, why did you do that?' And I hit him again."

Yeah, that's my favorite part. Kid gets one whack for breaking in, and a second well-deserved whack for being stupid.


Oh yes. Maybe she smacked some sense into the little moron. But I doubt it.
 
2009-02-25 05:02:34 PM  
img2.timeinc.net

approves.
 
2009-02-25 05:03:09 PM  
"Neighborhood Watch is for sissies" said one member of the Geriatric Armed Association. "Now what was I doing again?"
 
2009-02-25 05:03:33 PM  
The article title would be much better if they replaced saucepan with pot.
 
2009-02-25 05:04:00 PM  
"The intruders realized Basinski was no easy prey and ran."

This is why more people should arm themselves. Muggers and robbers are cowards. They prey on the weak and defenseless.
 
2009-02-25 05:04:01 PM  
image.com.com

Also approves.
 
2009-02-25 05:04:04 PM  
Everyone is talking about how cool the old lady is ...

Four kids break into her house, demand money, and start trashing the place. One kid gets struck and has no clue why that happened. Honestly? What I'm taking from this article? Kids are extremely stupid.
 
2009-02-25 05:09:15 PM  

what_now: I love the "old-people-beat-the-crap-out-of-robbers" stories.

It amuses me when some moron tries to mug an old guy only to find out the hard way that he's an ex-Navy seal, it tickles me when someone tries to carjack a grandmother only to find that she keeps a billy club in the car, and it lightens my heart when four teenagers try to break into an old lady's house only to find that she can make a weapon out of a frying pan.


THIS

I was watching the news the other night and they showed an elderly lady who had been beaten up and kidnapped by three young people. They had beaten the shiat out of this lady's face when they took her. Yet, there she was, all healed and nicely made-up for her court appearance, testifying in court and pointing out the asshole defendants, who were themselves crying like a bunch of babies. If they're convicted, two of them face life in prison. The old lady showed her stuff by surviving this crap and then testifying against her attackers (dumbfrkks). More power to her!
 
2009-02-25 05:11:44 PM  
videodetective.com

/Stop or My Mom Will Shoot, FTW
 
2009-02-25 05:12:21 PM  
FTFA: Before she even gave much thought about what she should do, she grabbed an Emeril Lagasse 5-quart sauce pan.

BAM!!!
 
2009-02-25 05:12:52 PM  
oldfarthenry:Let's see one of you young homos do that with a plastic microwave pot!!

That is the funniest thing I've heard all day, and I don't know why. It's now 5 minutes since I read it and I'm still giggling.
 
2009-02-25 05:14:25 PM  
Did anyone say "BAM!" yet, like Emeril Lagasse? Because he says that all the time, and the pan was his brand. And when you hit someone, it's like, "BAM!". 'Cause that would be pretty funny.
 
2009-02-25 05:15:35 PM  

geniusiknowit: "The intruders realized Basinski was no easy prey and ran."

This is why more people should arm themselves. Muggers and robbers are cowards. They prey on the weak and defenseless.


Where in this story are you seeing anyone weak, defenseless, or unarmed? If more old people were like this old biatch, the world would be a much more peaceful place.

My own aged grandmother, while probably not able to whack some ignorant mugger with a frying pan, would no doubt shame the young moron into killing himself by asking him if he'd like her to call his mommy to come help him drive home with the loot.
 
2009-02-25 05:16:26 PM  
FTFA: Later, they realized that they had hired one of the suspects to shovel their driveway several weeks ago.

"My wife gave them a big tip, so they thought we had money," he said.


Farking scum.
 
2009-02-25 05:18:34 PM  
Kiss the pan!
PAN KISSES YOU!!!
 
2009-02-25 05:21:48 PM  
Triangle man wanted for questioning
 
2009-02-25 05:22:18 PM  

thelordofcheese: Kiss the pan!
PAN KISSES YOU!!!


Came for that, thank you...

And what the farks the deal with all these old people beating the shiat of out criminals every other day on Fark. I mean, it's a good thing, putting these dirtbags in their place, but are steroids getting snuck into Fig Newtons or something???

/70 year-olds dude...
 
2009-02-25 05:22:38 PM  
img6.imageshack.us
 
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