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(NCBuy)   Parkay margarine looking for the best cheesy pick-up line. Winner gets $10,000. What's your best?   (ncbuy.com ) divider line
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6232 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jan 2003 at 8:05 AM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



455 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2003-01-30 11:54:32 AM  
If I pet you, would you follow me home?

Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
 
2003-01-30 11:54:45 AM  
Well it may not be very long, but it sure is skinny!
 
2003-01-30 11:58:09 AM  
Spasmolytic - i wish i had that for the blogathon (yes, i suck like that) this past year, i did all pick-up lines for the bloody thing, i was stretching to christian pick-up lines towards the last few hours.
 
2003-01-30 12:05:24 PM  
Would you like to see my W-2?
 
2003-01-30 12:05:34 PM  
"Oh My, What a wonderful hose you have, Mr. Fireman!"

obviously from the retrocrush link.....
 
2003-01-30 12:11:30 PM  
Hi, I'm 35, unemployed, and live with my parents.
/opposite George.
 
2003-01-30 12:16:11 PM  
"Hi, I make more money than you can spend."

I don't remember where I heard that one, but it's damn funny.
 
2003-01-30 12:17:58 PM  
"Your head looks like a really clean carrot!"

(Pinky, from Pinky and the Brain)
 
2003-01-30 12:19:12 PM  
Run finger across shoulder, then put in your mouth as if to taste it and say "Hmm, its no Parkay but you'll do."
 
2003-01-30 12:19:24 PM  
"Did that hurt"

'Did what hurt?'

"When you fell from heaven"
 
2003-01-30 12:20:50 PM  
"Did that hurt?"

'Did what hurt?'

"When you fell from heaven?"


Had to repost to enable voting.......
 
2003-01-30 12:22:05 PM  
guy in crowdwd bar: 'hey, did you just touch my ass?'

girl: 'no.'

guy: 'damn.'
 
2003-01-30 12:26:56 PM  
It's not intercourse without u and i.
 
2003-01-30 12:28:36 PM  
Eat me!
 
2003-01-30 12:34:48 PM  
"Are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only ten I see in here baby."

Used on me:
"Hi, my name is chance, do I have one?"
 
2003-01-30 12:36:49 PM  
A drunk guy approached me in a bar. Weaving where he stood, he announced I had a beautiful rack. He then proceeded to dive head first into my top, & ripping my shirt down the front!

So, the line didn't work. My friend I was with kicked his ass. Haaving a ripped top proved interesting for the rest of the evening.
 
2003-01-30 12:37:07 PM  
1.Hey, you remind me of my next girlfriend.

2.Let's play Photography. We'll go into a dark room and see what develops.

3. Let's play Dentist. We'll see if you have any cavities I can fill.
 
2003-01-30 12:42:48 PM  
Get in the van.
 
2003-01-30 12:43:47 PM  
Q: What do you call the worthless skin surrounding the vagina?
A: You baby, you!
 
2003-01-30 12:45:33 PM  
Me: "My watch can read you mind, baby. It says you ain't got panties on"

Girl: "But I do have panties on."

Me: *shake watch* "damn things running fast again."
 
2003-01-30 12:47:36 PM  
Can I bust my jumbo jet between your twin towers?
 
2003-01-30 12:48:07 PM  
bah

now with voting.. like it matters.

Me: "My watch can read you mind, baby. It says you ain't got panties on"

Girl: "But I do have panties on."

Me: *shake watch* "damn things running fast again."
 
2003-01-30 12:48:35 PM  
"Do you like the guy who is brothers with strongmadandstrongsad?"

But you gotta say it really fast.
 
2003-01-30 12:51:37 PM  
[image from www1.physik.tu-muenchen.de too old to be available]

you want to have sex with me
 
2003-01-30 12:52:33 PM  
"How would you like to be the next ex-Mrs. Frankeinstein?"
 
2003-01-30 12:54:16 PM  
Might have been said..


"Nice dress, baby.... can I... talk you out of it?

*finger pistol*
 
2003-01-30 12:54:17 PM  
"You like apples?"

Girl: Yea

you: "How about we go out back and fark? Howya like them apples?"

Ba-dam-dam!
 
2003-01-30 12:55:26 PM  
Baby, it looks like someone has taken two big 'ol hams and stuffed 'em down the back of your dress.

/Leon Phelps.
 
2003-01-30 12:57:29 PM  
lol! JadeFrog01's site is unavailable, Exceeded allocated data transfer! Jesus Christo Fark is full of a bunch of horndogs. I hope To god some of these lines work otherwise memebrship at FARK is going to drop dramaticallay what with all the pent up sexual frustration deaths!
 
2003-01-30 01:00:08 PM  
She was only a mortician's daughter, but anyone cadaver...
 
2003-01-30 01:03:57 PM  
Sudie, ya got my vote.

Must be the Saints fan in me.
 
2003-01-30 01:04:40 PM  
Let's play Carpenter -
We'll get hammered and then I'll screw you.
 
2003-01-30 01:04:41 PM  
My hovercraft is full of eels.
 
2003-01-30 01:07:16 PM  
You must be Jamaican, 'cause ja-makin me crazy!
 
2003-01-30 01:07:43 PM  
This line only works if you can fake an irish accent. For the whole night. And probably the next morning.
you: "So do you believe in the luck of the Irish?"
her: "No."
you: "Well, I'm the luckiest man in this bar, and I can prove it, too."
her: "How's that?"
you: "I'm the only one talking to you, aren't I?"

Always good for at least a smile.
 
2003-01-30 01:07:55 PM  
Hi, my name is tyler, you'll be screaming that later.
 
2003-01-30 01:08:46 PM  
"Hi, my name's Bob, and it's been 3 weeks since my last kebab"
 
pr2
2003-01-30 01:09:44 PM  
"Do you know the difference between you and my tube socks?"
"No."
"I haven't blown my wad into you yet."
 
2003-01-30 01:13:22 PM  
Do you spread for bread?
 
2003-01-30 01:13:26 PM  
you: Do you want to make love?
her: No...
you: Okay, in that case, wanna FARK?
 
2003-01-30 01:14:51 PM  
I'd Like to butter your muffin!
 
2003-01-30 01:16:11 PM  
Actual conversation:

Waitress: That guy over at the bar is hitting on me.
Me: I'm hitting on you. What's the difference?
Waitress: Oh, you're nice.
Me: For the moment...
 
2003-01-30 01:16:20 PM  
My brother used to say this:
Him: I found a job where you can plant tulips for $10 an hour...
Her: Really? Where?
Him: Well you can start by planting your two lips right here *pointing at his unit*
 
2003-01-30 01:16:48 PM  
blah
 
2003-01-30 01:17:29 PM  
I don't bite... wait -- actually, I do bite.

/startrek
 
2003-01-30 01:17:58 PM  
A guy actually said this to me once!
My snake wants to vomit in your cave
 
2003-01-30 01:21:38 PM  
wanna go back to my place and spoon on the couch?
No? Then hows about we just Fork then?

(see, thats the one time in you life where the spork is just not the shiat)
 
2003-01-30 01:21:54 PM  
Not a pickup, but it helps in the conversation...

"Flattery, my dear, will get you everywhere."
 
2003-01-30 01:22:08 PM  
If you are a lesbian and spot a hot lesbian, go up to here and say either "less filling" or "tastes great." If you are lucky, a hot catfight will ensue.
 
2003-01-30 01:23:42 PM  
[image from flyinglemur.net too old to be available]


1)I couldn't find a good enough picture for the "You ever had your ass licked by a fat man in a trench coat?" line
2) I wanted to use a picture to get your attention because...
3) I'm a vote whore with no original thoughts of my own.
 
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