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(Mirror.co.uk)   There are five types of orgasm. The positive ("Oh YES"), the negative ("oh NO"), the Religious ("oh GOD"), the fake ("oh SUBBY"), and the one where you call out the wrong name and get strangled   (mirror.co.uk) divider line
    More: Scary  
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15398 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2009 at 3:14 AM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



103 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2009-02-18 02:20:41 AM  
The proper way to handle that situation is to just give her some surprise buttsecks. That way she'll surely remember your name.

/don't call me shirley
 
2009-02-18 02:33:08 AM  
I feel called out by this headline
 
2009-02-18 02:46:11 AM  
What about the Gestalt? Women have just as much as men do.
 
2009-02-18 02:52:18 AM  
Isn't describing orgasms against the rules on Fark? Perhaps it should be in or\\
 
2009-02-18 03:06:36 AM  
"Tracey's mum Wendy Wild"

Is her mom a porn star?
 
2009-02-18 03:19:13 AM  
lolfinty subby

farking hilarious
 
2009-02-18 03:19:41 AM  
Scooter club? I wonder if they wear a three piece back patch.
 
2009-02-18 03:21:16 AM  
Shirley, they must have been in the missionary position.
 
2009-02-18 03:21:19 AM  
I've gotta ask... was it still in her while he was strangling her?
 
2009-02-18 03:22:15 AM  
What's wrong w/ a little strangulation during sex? Oh he killed her, well that's doing it wrong.
 
2009-02-18 03:22:48 AM  

pjbreeze: Shirley, they must have been in the missionary position.


No, they were doing it doggy style. And stop calling me Shirley.
 
2009-02-18 03:22:58 AM  
I submitted this with a fun.... Oh god please help... no one could have submitted this with a funnier headline :)

-GWW
 
2009-02-18 03:24:58 AM  
Self-deprecation always gets a +1 from me!
 
2009-02-18 03:25:01 AM  
I only know about two from that list.

/and I ain't saying which two.
 
2009-02-18 03:30:11 AM  

thinks_on_feet: I only know about two from that list.

/and I ain't saying which two.


The fake and the sarcastic("oh god")?
 
2009-02-18 03:30:47 AM  
That chick was 39? She looked like she was 53 herself, and it also looked like that picture was a few years old.

Also, check out the guy's teeth.
 
2009-02-18 03:30:59 AM  
Christine Lavin unavailable for comment?
 
2009-02-18 03:31:14 AM  
+1

/oh yeah, Subby, moar!
 
2009-02-18 03:32:32 AM  
+1 for the headline

/wonders which subby MissFeasance is referring to
 
2009-02-18 03:34:07 AM  
Dad?
 
2009-02-18 03:35:41 AM  

thegod082: That chick was 39? She looked like she was 53 herself, and it also looked like that picture was a few years old.
Also, check out the guy's teeth.


They're Brittish. Probably from stupid sounding town(e) as well. Like "Snuffing upon Humpingshire". Dude sounds like a quality husband though.
 
2009-02-18 03:35:51 AM  
Awww...she was just trying to get him into Buckin Bronco. Anyone play? While hittin her from the back. Say another girl's name, and see how long you can stay on after that.

And what's a negative orgasm? The oops I just accidentally peed one?
 
2009-02-18 03:41:01 AM  
Looks like Alan Partridge's dad.
 
2009-02-18 03:42:18 AM  
What about 'oh fark' and 'giggity giggity'
 
2009-02-18 03:43:18 AM  

myalias1845: And what's a negative orgasm? The oops I just accidentally peed one?


Heh- I dated a girl for a while who had a shall we say "unique orgasims" the first time it happened, I thought she was into water sports, so I just figured, "Hey when in Rome..."

boy, was I mistaken.
 
2009-02-18 03:43:38 AM  
img22.imageshack.usView Full Size


imageshack.us

Anyone else get this lovely ad placement?
 
2009-02-18 03:45:09 AM  

yarnothuntin: myalias1845: And what's a negative orgasm? The oops I just accidentally peed one?

Heh- I dated a girl for a while who had a shall we say "unique orgasims" the first time it happened, I thought she was into water sports, so I just figured, "Hey when in Rome..."

boy, was I mistaken.


Please elaborate.
 
2009-02-18 03:51:04 AM  

myalias1845: yarnothuntin: myalias1845: And what's a negative orgasm? The oops I just accidentally peed one?

Heh- I dated a girl for a while who had a shall we say "unique orgasims" the first time it happened, I thought she was into water sports, so I just figured, "Hey when in Rome..."

boy, was I mistaken.

Please elaborate.


I understood the implication to be that she involuntarily urinated as a result of her climax, and yarnothuntin, unaware that this was an involuntary reaction, followed suit with his own urination. But that was just what I got out of it.
 
2009-02-18 03:52:42 AM  
"oh SUBBY!" The "too-humble submitter" headlines rarely fail, I notice, but this particular one was pretty clever.

/ hates the rest of them
 
2009-02-18 03:54:51 AM  
Crime of passion. shiat happens.
 
2009-02-18 03:55:18 AM  

myalias1845: Please elaborate.


She was a squirter (female ejaculation)- but, I thought she peed on me LOL
 
2009-02-18 03:55:43 AM  
Who photoshopped his teeth before he went down on her? She let him go there...........Of course she might not of "washed up" either so it goes both way.

Nah, fark it, they're someones kids and old enough to clean up.
 
2009-02-18 03:55:54 AM  
oh WHARGARBLL!
 
2009-02-18 03:56:10 AM  

nunoyo: myalias1845: yarnothuntin: myalias1845: And what's a negative orgasm? The oops I just accidentally peed one?

Heh- I dated a girl for a while who had a shall we say "unique orgasims" the first time it happened, I thought she was into water sports, so I just figured, "Hey when in Rome..."

boy, was I mistaken.

Please elaborate.

I understood the implication to be that she involuntarily urinated as a result of her climax, and yarnothuntin, unaware that this was an involuntary reaction, followed suit with his own urination. But that was just what I got out of it.


Oh, that's what I got. Just wanted more juicy details. (No pun intended...or was it)
 
2009-02-18 03:56:54 AM  

yarnothuntin: myalias1845: Please elaborate.

She was a squirter (female ejaculation)- but, I thought she peed on me LOL


hehe...so you peed back?
 
2009-02-18 03:57:50 AM  

myalias1845:

hehe...so you peed back?


I thought that what she was into LOL
 
2009-02-18 04:03:09 AM  

yarnothuntin: myalias1845:

hehe...so you peed back?

I thought that what she was into LOL


x1 new keyboard please.
 
2009-02-18 04:05:17 AM  
100monkeystyping.comView Full Size


That's nothing. People say weird shiat during sex. One time I called this girl Mom.

/hot like a black tar roof
 
2009-02-18 04:06:11 AM  
But.. but.. what about the silent kind where the sock doesn't make any noise at all?
 
2009-02-18 04:13:29 AM  

yarnothuntin: myalias1845:

hehe...so you peed back?

I thought that what she was into LOL


That's awesome. You are a real team player.

Pee fight!!!
 
2009-02-18 04:15:00 AM  
She was probably fantasizing about a guy with white teeth.
 
2009-02-18 04:17:09 AM  
I'm kind of torn by this. The negative part; what she did didn't justify murder, and a woman is dead because of somebody who couldn't control his rage.

The positive part; one less cheating whore in the world, and this article gives a shout-out to other women not to be sluts lest they get choked to death. Not saying it's justified, but it is a positive side-effect of such murders. Cheating is still a damned awful thing to do, and it's hard to complain about an action that decreases the amount of cheating going on in the world.
 
2009-02-18 04:24:49 AM  

myalias1845: That's awesome. You are a real team player.

Pee fight!!!


At first she was well, pissed. She turned around and was all, WTF?! I stammered out an explaination and she laughed and just said, "well, I have to wash the sheets anyway".

/sigh- good times.
 
2009-02-18 04:25:41 AM  
I once said the wrong name just as we were starting, but fortunately she had really low self esteem
 
2009-02-18 04:40:36 AM  
Headline of the year!!!!!
 
2009-02-18 04:47:10 AM  
I made a GF fart once as she had an orgasm....i lol'd....she was not as amused as I was
 
2009-02-18 04:51:55 AM  
+1 subby!
 
2009-02-18 04:53:03 AM  
That headline was quite the experience.
I need a smoke now.
 
2009-02-18 05:00:29 AM  
TFA sounds like a script from 'Guiding Light' or East Enders: Tracey has multiple sclerosis, they belong to a scooter club, pinned down crucifix style (kinky!),entirely innocent texts(sure),stormy relationship(makes for better make up sex), a mother called Wendy Wild (couldn't make that up),he trawled the net for swingers so he could film her having sex with other people, and he made her prostitute herself. Just another day in Albert Square or Springfield.
 
2009-02-18 05:01:15 AM  
Disappointed not have seen the old "Bucking Bronco position" joke yet.

That's where you take her doggy-style, grab her tits, call her another woman's name and see how long you can stay on.
 
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