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		Studys concludes that if your last name does not begin with A - M, you are doomed to failure (ananova.com)		37
		More: Asinine

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2442 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Aug 2001 at 7:54 AM | Favorite | share:

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37 Comments (+0 »)

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Bap2		2001-08-31 07:59:10 AM

i think they mean last name.

oh i'm doomed!

The_French		2001-08-31 08:02:21 AM

if they mean the middle initial, i got 3 words for em.
J.F.K.
ha!

and if it's last name were talking about, 2 words.
Christopher Walken.

scraping-fetus-off-the-wheel		2001-08-31 08:07:19 AM

Aaliyah,
so much for that theory.

Jaxomlotus		2001-08-31 08:14:53 AM

Arbogast,

there goes that theory.

fb-		2001-08-31 08:29:09 AM

Haha cool! I thought I was a failure because I'm lazy and do a poor, half-assed job. Now I know it is just the fates conspiring against me.

Dido		2001-08-31 08:36:58 AM

The_French: you changed your alphabet?

J.F.K. - all three are in between A and M in mine..

Oh wait- you see J.F.K. as a failure!

scraping-fetus-off-the-wheel		2001-08-31 08:44:13 AM

JFK?
Hardly a failure when someone blows your head off in dallas.
But if you put too much luggage on your plane.............

Demosthenes		2001-08-31 09:30:58 AM

"Putting too much luggage on your plane" sounds like a euphemism for something dirty.......

Derk		2001-08-31 09:34:21 AM

"Economics editor Pam Woodhall ..."
"The paper quotes psychologist Richard Wiseman..."

Doesn't sound like those people are doing too bad.

Brooklynguy		2001-08-31 09:48:19 AM

I read this in the Economist yesterday. It's a joke.

Super_Crazy		2001-08-31 09:59:03 AM

Scraping-fetus-off-the-wheel : Bad attempt at humor there. Try again.

The_French		2001-08-31 10:00:30 AM

you gotta admit, that WAS a pretty stupid reason for a plane to go down...

and yeah, i meant J.F.K. as a failure in the fact that he's... well, dead.

scraping-fetus-off-the-wheel		2001-08-31 10:04:05 AM

super crazy,
Twas not an attempt at humor.

My favorite aaliyah song,
"if your girl only knew"(how to fly a 402)

fb-		2001-08-31 10:14:10 AM

Aaliyah dead at age 22. A nation yawns.

InjunAndrew		2001-08-31 10:20:13 AM

fark me, i'm one letter off. (it starts with an "N")

aronnaxii		2001-08-31 10:42:45 AM

You'd think Tim Allen would be the glaring exception to this. But I think the fact that his real last name is 'Dick' cancels out the fact that it's in the first half of the alphabet.

CrazyDazed		2001-08-31 10:51:51 AM

Hah, my last name starts with 'S' but i dont give a fark about being last in a line. I like being the last because umm.. I make last laugh! bahahaaa..a .a a... excuse me.

*runs away*

Flakeloaf		2001-08-31 10:57:23 AM

Gary Coleman?

Meatros		2001-08-31 11:00:03 AM

So being that my name is Zack Zimmerman, does that mean that I am doomed to failure? Or could I turn things around and become a male britney spears? I think if anything being last and having low self esteem lead to dummer child rens and a low edjewmacation scedual.
Brane leking out anal spink tur

BinkyBinky		2001-08-31 11:20:02 AM

I'm pretty sure that what letter your name starts with doesn't matter so much as how appealing your name sounds. That's why celebrities tend to have stage names and such.

-BinkyBinky...the amazing mysanthropic 800 pound lesbian with a silly last name

Jodibug0975		2001-08-31 11:51:47 AM

hmmm... J.L.M. here, and i'm still a failure *sigh* what gives??? even when i was married it was J.L.F..... now what?????

ImDracula		2001-08-31 12:29:13 PM

OMG I'm as doomed as doomed can be y'know.
My initials are WT

JimJones		2001-08-31 12:37:55 PM

BlinkyBlinky:I always thought Celebrities had stage names because of numerology beliefs,Norma Jean Baker and Madonna Ciccone adding up to a failing number or something.

havaniceday		2001-08-31 01:05:20 PM

I can think of 3 exceptions to this rule, Christopher Walken, Kevin Smith, and Arnold Schwarzanegger (sp?)

SmackFromGod		2001-08-31 01:12:09 PM

Phew, just made it. My last name is McCausland.

I Idolize Tim Allen

Flakeloaf		2001-08-31 02:25:29 PM

Looks like it'll be pretty successful to me.

pbsaurus		2001-08-31 02:32:27 PM

I guess that the EU just had to prove this by nixing the GE Honeywell merger.

pbsaurus		2001-08-31 02:36:48 PM

Sam Walton? Jack Welch? George Washington? Henry Rollins? Pbsaurus? Failures I think not?

Diogenes		2001-08-31 02:52:23 PM

I'd be hard pressed to think of a better tag than "Asinine". I could easily make up an argument that said A through M's are less successful and more prone to paranoia from years of anxiety of getting picked first for everything. I hope this article is a gag.

Flakeloaf: You funny. Me laugh.

kanonball		2001-08-31 04:52:40 PM

...MR T PITIES THE FOOL THAT CALLS HIM A FAILURE

EggYolkEnema		2001-08-31 05:54:52 PM

ImDracula, your name is White Trash?

BorkingChikapa		2001-08-31 06:30:37 PM

Maybe this is true... Warren Buffett, Bill Gates, Paul Allen... wait, what about Donald TRUMP. Ananova sucks my balls.

Sproutnik		2001-08-31 07:24:41 PM

A solution might be to change your last name to be at the top of the list... Something like this :

!!!!!##Lastname

Well, it does work for porn pics...

jjorsett		2001-08-31 09:07:08 PM

Of the British Prime Ministers elected in the 20th century, only Margaret Thatcher and Harold Wilson don't have surnames starting A to M.

Uhhh. Margaret married Denis (no, not a typo) Thatcher long after she got out of school, I'll bet. So she didn't end up on the short end of the stick due to that. (Of course, her birth surname was Roberts, so we can reinstate her as an exception. However, the lunkhead writing the article ought to have noted that, not me.)