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(Daily Southtown)   Family ignores carbon monoxide detector for two hours. Death almost ensues   (dailysouthtown.com) divider line 38
    More: Dumbass  
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6012 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jan 2003 at 6:12 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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OBB
2003-01-25 01:49:40 AM  
Patient: Doctor doctor! I almost died because of Carbon Monoxide poisoning!
Doctor: Oh, I see yo' problem...

(get it? CO = carbon monoxide)
 
2003-01-25 04:38:04 AM  
OBB: Worst. Joke. Ever. ;-)
 
2003-01-25 06:16:22 AM  
The family's name isn't Nitschke is it?
 
2003-01-25 06:17:29 AM  
Hey, if I nearly kill my family can I get an award too?
 
2003-01-25 06:17:41 AM  
I'll bet they pay attention to it from now on heh heh

Scott
 
2003-01-25 06:18:09 AM  
Another missed opportunity for stupid people to die by natural selection.
 
2003-01-25 06:28:45 AM  
"I should have known something was wrong sooner when he didn't want to play video games and wanted to sleep instead," Wendy Johnson said.

hmm...considering i havnt not stayed up till 4 playing cs or somthing in the last year...this fits
 
2003-01-25 06:28:54 AM  
"This is a classic example of what a working carbon monoxide detector can do for a family," he said. "We are so proud that she was alert and smart enough to get her family out."

Let me guess, this guy must run one of those fire departments that show up 45 minutes after you call 911.
 
2003-01-25 06:32:00 AM  
[image from learn2live.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk too old to be available]
 
2003-01-25 06:56:15 AM  
I think the asshat ignoring the alarm whould have atleast died.
 
2003-01-25 06:58:05 AM  
Now is the time for all carbon monoxide detector sounds to unite and protest their associaiton with smoke detector low battery sounds.
 
2003-01-25 07:09:55 AM  
"The carbon monoxide detector on the fire alarm had been beeping for about two hours."

these people are the urine in the gene pool.
 
2003-01-25 07:50:39 AM  
yea, the worst part is she got a plaque for heroism after being an idiot and ignoring the alarm for 2 hours. Would she have gotten the award if only one kid died but after 2 hours she saved the rest?
 
2003-01-25 07:52:32 AM  
That was the stupid article ever. It spent the whole time praising some stupid women for almost letting her entire family day by ignoring the detector.

It should have insulted her but it called her a hero. It's like banning red pens for marking childrens work.
 
2003-01-25 07:57:32 AM  
" Johnson was given a citizen's award by Joyce for saving the lives of her family members."

Darwin Awards may be given to owners of carbon monoxide detectors too.
 
2003-01-25 08:28:49 AM  
If you can ignore one of these things for two hours, you can just about ignore them forever.
 
2003-01-25 08:34:31 AM  
i guess i have to be the one to play the race card huh? genetta johnson? tehehehee i wonder, is she jewish? naah..
italian? naaah.. rumanian? i don't think so.. just another stupid c00n being rewarded for behaving like a poorly trained monkey by a pussy society that's scared of pissing-off al sharpton, jesse jackson and missuh johnny.
 
2003-01-25 10:02:13 AM  
houses should be required to have CO detectors. My sister's furnace had a slow leak for a couple of months before they figured out what was wrong. The doctors did numerous tests because she was missing so much work. It wasn't until she noticed that the pets and even her step-daughter were sleeping alot that she realized what was going on.
 
2003-01-25 10:24:49 AM  
Man, they where SO CLOSE to winning a DARWIN!!!
 
2003-01-25 10:48:10 AM  
The Darwin Awards need a honorable mention category.
 
2003-01-25 10:49:06 AM  
I read this National Geographic article about tonnes of carbon dioxide being trapped in the water of some mountain lake in Africa. There was a ground tremor and a great invisible cloud swept down the mountainside. Everyone in all the surrounding villages just fell asleep and died. THAT was interesting.

This was pretty boring.

Except the part about the fire chief being named James Joyce.
 
2003-01-25 10:49:48 AM  
How proud they all must be.
 
2003-01-25 11:06:36 AM  
The Carbon Monoxide detector is known to go off at random. I'm convinced a good fart will set it off for a few hours. One day though, the whole "Boy Who Cried Wolf" thing will kick in and surely my whole family will die a peaceful in-your-sleep kinda death.
 
2003-01-25 11:39:33 AM  
Darwin, come out, come out wherever you are.
 
2003-01-25 11:49:52 AM  
That read like an Onion article!

In other news, woman who ignores train level crossing lights and is blasted into the afterlife by the 10:15 express train - fails to get award.

dumbest. people. ever.

:-(
 
2003-01-25 12:17:36 PM  
No, Wldncrzy14, the worst joke ever was perpetrated by my friend Tom, who once said (very proudly) "SEE YOU later, COPPERs!" to a radaring police car as we drove past it. Admittedly, this was in high school, so sophmoric humor was our specialty at the time. However, we all recognized it for what it was. A turd of a joke.
 
2003-01-25 12:29:55 PM  
We generate a lot of CO gas at work from our 50 megawatt furnace. We have detectors everywhere, and portable ones too. The 8 hour exposure limit is 30 ppm. If one of our detectors goes off, and it's only 32, you know you can stay for a bit, but there is a problem. 315 in their house is scary!
 
2003-01-25 12:36:01 PM  
the worst joke ever was perpetrated by my friend Tom, who once said (very proudly) "SEE YOU later, COPPERs!"

i'd argue this is a better joke, since it doesn't require you to turn "o" into "yo".

either way, they are most pun-gent.

 
G2V
2003-01-25 12:37:36 PM  
Johnson said she has several smoke and carbon monoxide detectors in her house, and is diligent about checking the batteries.

She thought they were music boxes.

Beep beep beep
 
OBB
2003-01-25 01:32:22 PM  
I still like my pun better... but the CU Copper pun is good too
 
OBB
2003-01-25 01:34:51 PM  
And I bet the Fire Chief's parents were English majors... why else would they name their son that?
 
2003-01-25 03:44:25 PM  
As I read this I was secretly dreaming of a story about a man who wanted to test his smoke detector by holding a lighter to it and in doing so, burns his house down and everyone dies.

If that happened, I would laugh for weeks.
 
2003-01-25 04:08:31 PM  
"And it was all beep beep beep beep beep...."
 
2003-01-25 05:28:17 PM  
Johnson's sister-in-law, Beverly Pitts, died in a fire Monday in the South Chicago community. The fire also killed Pitts' 6-year-old niece Tatiana Pitts and a family friend, 27-year-old Zamoria Jones. That home had no working smoke detectors.

JesusFarkingChristmas! Her sister-n-law and niece just died in a fire and she was ignoring the smoke/CO alarm? This woman should be charged with child neglect and gross stupidity.
 
2003-01-25 06:20:30 PM  
"We piled into the car to keep warm, and I called the fire department."

Um, doesn't keeping a car idling in the garage hurt the situation? Maybe she was indecisive about the whole "kill ourselves" thing.
 
2003-01-25 06:30:12 PM  
MooKow: never assume hostility where stupidity will suffice.

Note to self: if installing a CO detector and fire alarm, make sure they have different sounding alarms.
 
2003-01-25 07:30:24 PM  
it was "scary to think what could have happened"? WTF? Think? Uh, there's no thinking about it ... you would have all DIED. Period.
 
2003-01-25 11:52:01 PM  
I once let a carbon monoxide detector go off for 5 hours before getting out of the house, because it sounded like my brother who also likes to go "beep" on occasion.
 
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