As an analyst in this industry (meat and poultry), there is one site I've bookmarked for its cleverness.

Link (new window)

It covers both men and women with the scrolling text.

Quite right too, we had a horse rider straight off the fields in my shop the other week (big out of town retail unit)
She trampled horse shiat all over the carpet and farking stank. But of course they wouldn't notice with the amount of toffee up their noses

Works fine for me.

Bet that guy felt like a horse's ass once he saw this trotted out for all to see. Tough to saddle him with his own whinnying, but if the shoe fits...

well, shiat. I keep hearing the cat scratching at the door, but it's NOT there man.

Work with, and through, your trip. What you sense is not always there

DRTFA, but assuming it had the store owners got bent out of shape about something trifling?

Link is working.

FTFA: Miss Gunton said: 'Before I went in I made sure that I wasn't trailing mess everywhere.

Dragging toilet paper on your shoe is slightly different than smelling like a horse's ass you just finished riding.

If I were the lady in the article.

I'd have kept my mouth shut, gone home, had a shower and got changed. Surely this would have been less embarrasing than running to the Daily Mail (did she think she'd get more sympathy from the aspiring middle classes) and publically declaring that I stink of shiat!

In order for the pun to work, can someone tell me WTF 'offal' has to do with the story?

'offal' means excrement, so the woman smelled like horse poo.

CayceP [TotalFark]
'offal' means excrement, so the woman smelled like horse poo.

Er, I was under the impression offal were the guts and stuff that are discarded from, among other things, fish. Can't be bothered Webstering, but I'm sure my mind isn't totally shot. Yet.

Offal is generally used to describe what is referred to as organ meat - in other words the heart, liver, kidney, tripe, etc.

If she didn't have any horse excrement on her but smelled like her horse and it was too foul to tolerate, she needs to check into how her horse is being kept. If the stable isn't clean and the horses aren't allowed out enough, they can stink too much of horse urine. A lot more foul than the excrement. Typically, if you leave them out in an exercise yard for a few hours a day and keep their stalls clean that stink will blow off.

Thudfark: CayceP [TotalFark]
'offal' means excrement, so the woman smelled like horse poo.

Er, I was under the impression offal were the guts and stuff that are discarded from, among other things, fish. Can't be bothered Webstering, but I'm sure my mind isn't totally shot. Yet.

offal (new window)

and you are correct

I think we are all overlooking the most important part of this story... the sidebar



/so very hot....linked.

is not amused

/link is hot
//horse sex is not

She didn't smell like this did she...?

BDR459: Thudfark: CayceP [TotalFark]
'offal' means excrement, so the woman smelled like horse poo.

Er, I was under the impression offal were the guts and stuff that are discarded from, among other things, fish. Can't be bothered Webstering, but I'm sure my mind isn't totally shot. Yet.

offal (new window)

and you are correct

Goddamn it, FreeRice lies to me...

She's only 29?

Down in hog farm country, guys on their way home from work get front-of-the-line privledges at the Piggly-Wiggly. Nobody wants to stand next to that. OTOH, those guys got dirty by working, and picked up their milk at a brisk pace.

Being a rude horse person + Living near other rude horse people = Nice citizens complaining!

mark12A: For twenty years I would often stop by the store after riding my horses and NOBODY ever said anything to me about smell. They'd get weirded out by the riding clothes, but no one ever complained.

Methinks the store clerk was just being an envious prick.

Methinks this chick is plain rude.

When you are off from a long ride, you stiinnk. I don't get what possesed her to think that's acceptible in public. I don't go out shopping after the gym myself, much less with stink from an animal all over.

she looks like she'd stink and dare anyone to be offended by it

I try not to go anywhere after the barn, but to horse people it doesn't smell that bad.

When the boyfriend has to pick me up on occasion in the bad weather, he thinks otherwise!

Random factoid:

It is thought that wealthy Europeans tended to be spared by the bubonic plague because the scent of horses is offensive to plague lice. Horses and stable hands didn't catch it either.

Could be wrong...

Just how hard is it to brush horseshiat off of ones boots before going out?

I've been to quite a few ranch stores and small town general stores that are populated by cowboys. Never met anyone who outright stank of horse manure- even with poop-crusted boots. Sounds like someone isn't hosing down their stall and changing the straw often enough.

She looks like she enjoys snapping her riding crop on humans as well.

I kind of understand this. I got stuck in line at the store behind some guy who must have been chain smoking, drinking cheap beer and eating McDonalds in a tiny trailer while wearing the same clothes for about a month. It took some effort to get that level of concentrated stank on one person.

Oh and he was drunk and abusive to the checker too.

/I see farmers come in with pig poo all over their shoes at the grocery too.

she likely smelled better than many of the other customers. she would do just fine in rural texas or oklahoma. except for her accent.

CayceP: 'offal' means excrement, so the woman smelled like horse poo.

No, it doesn't! (new window)

Horse poo isn't that stinky, unless you're feeding Rusty Beef-a-Reeno. I think it kinda smells good out in the fresh air

cow poo stinks cuz all the cjd shiat they put in the feed

pig crap stinks like nothing else and has a half life of 8bazillion years

My old boss was a rider, used to come in after going the barn. He rarely smelled that bad, goddamn his truck was awful.

Offal is not a word I'd use in relation to horse care and boarding.

Besides, doesn't Subby know the word "equestrian?"

/Vocabulary FAIL

Oh, no! Women have been hit hardest by Phallocentric Patriachy Oppressiors using her horsey smell as a lame excuse. Government alphabet time!

Unless she was rolling around in the manure pile, I fail to see how bad she could possibly smell. I ride and work at a horse farm to pay for it and really, it's not that bad. Horses have a rather warm and sweet smell, as do have and shavings used to feed the horses and bed their stalls. Even horse manure does not smell that bad, especially compared to cow, dog, cat, people, etc. and even less so after it has dried. I often stop by grocery stores on the way home and have never heard a complaint.

Of course, I live in New Hampshire, so make of that what you will.

How stupid is this biatch to not know how much you stink after riding?

I knew that the first time I rode.

mark12A: For twenty years I would often stop by the store after riding my horses and NOBODY ever said anything to me about smell. They'd get weirded out by the riding clothes, but no one ever complained.

Methinks the store clerk was just being an envious prick.

Sneak in in disguise some time and find out what nickname they gave you.

Wait, people who live in town-unused to the smells of nature think that horse people stink? Get out.

Man up, you citified wuss! At least I don't smell like the guy who came in my corner grocery store smelling of week old puke and fresh urine. That's not natural.

I rather like the horse smell. Its mostly their sweat, I doubt the fellow customer was smelling much manure even if thats what they thought it was.

I like the smell probably for the same reason I like that dead fish smell thats at the beach, I have good memory associations with it. Riding a horse is fun, so is going to the beach. :)

Horse poo smell GOOD, as does horse sweat, and horse hair...

Dumbest damn reason to throw someone out of as store EVAR.

Anyone lame enough to complain about the smell of a horse.. needs to be repeatedly and painfully smacked with a riding crop