Priceless....

How do I get rid of this burning when I pee

I've got this body wrapped up in a blanket and I need a place to stash it where the cops will never think to look. Can you help with that?

At least they are not calling 911

BOOMER SOONER!!!

From TFA, people are complaining about long wait times for legitimate calls. Apparently when they budgeted for staff they forgot to include the "most people are idiots and will abuse our service and surpass our call projections" line item increase.

How do you make gravy?

Is time travel possible?

How do you misspell something over the phone? Do they mispronounce satellite?

Can you get pregnant from buttsecks?

How do you skin a cat?

They could open up a 511 service that played adds while folks were on hold, this would pay for the service and folks working there could jsut make crap up for stupid dolts that want to know where to buy a scarf.

Ba Ba Booey!!

Civic Info
APPROVES (new window)

The is a whole lot of win in many of those comments.

Hello, is this 311 information? Great, could you please tell me how the hell Thomas Crown stole that second painting at the end of the movie, that's something that has always bugged me.

Car_Ramrod: Who put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp? Who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong? Who put the dip in the dip da dip da dip?

Who put the freak in french fries?

stupid idea, unnecessary "service", wasted tax money, why would anyone be surprised???

People are so god damn stupid.

greaser_77: BOOMER SOONER

go soooooners wooot

sooners pict provided for your viewing pleasure by the " forward thinking sooners " not those knuckle dragging sooners that want to teach creationsm in science classes .. hmmmm. the end .

I'm stuck to my chair. I'm so very scared. Help.

Does this bow tie make me look gay?

I wanna live in a world where people who want to set up civic information hotlines, AND people who would call such a hotline (for whatever reason) DO NOT EXIST.

Thanks for the forward Looking Sooners pix.

gotta go . . .

pope183: greaser_77: BOOMER SOONER

go soooooners wooot

sooners pict provided for your viewing pleasure by the " forward thinking sooners " not those knuckle dragging sooners that want to teach creationsm in science classes .. hmmmm. the end .

possible man-face detected...
preparing "that's a man, baby" comment ahead of further evidence...

This was a retarded plan by the city.

They made one number (311) for all city departments.

Then they took away the ability to dial a department directly.

Of course there are going to be delays if every single call to any city department has to first be answered by the main switchboard, even if the caller knows exactly what department he needs to deal with (and possibly deals with them on a daily basis). It's also wasteful, since you have to hire a whole lot more operators than you would otherwise (since the article says each department's switchboard still exists, you just can't call them without going through the 311 service first).

Morons.

Nasty_McFilth: I'm stuck to my chair. I'm so very scared. Help.

DING! DING! DING!
That's a winner!!!!

Kongressman Grandma: Can you get pregnant from buttsecks?

Nope. You can't get any diseases, either. And you're still a virgin!

I knew that would be Canada before I ever read TFA. I don't quite know how.

We've had the same service in Calgary for quite some time (successfully). You would think that they could use it as a model for their own service.

/Ah well.
//sure there are morons that call the Calgary line much in the same way.

Bob_Laublaw: Amsterdamaged: How do you make gravy?

How to Make Gravy (new window)

/you're welcome
//311 receptionist

Thanks man. I really liked that. Tastes good too :D

What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Airfoilsguy: What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

African or European?

Nasty_McFilth: I'm stuck to my chair. I'm so very scared. Help.

THIS

Bonus points whoever has the original thread link

Seige101: Nasty_McFilth: I'm stuck to my chair. I'm so very scared. Help.

THIS

Bonus points whoever has the original thread link

Link (new window)