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(Some Guy)   Jimmy Kimmel Says " I Tried Sex & Didn't Like it"   (starmagazine.com) divider line 119
    More: Unlikely  
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20830 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jan 2003 at 4:54 AM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



119 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2003-01-16 11:46:41 PM
Unlikely he tried sex
 
2003-01-16 11:53:04 PM
psssst...Jimmy.....That wasn't a woman.
 
2003-01-17 02:57:50 AM
I think he's just trying to get sympathy from the Juggies.
 
2003-01-17 03:32:52 AM
Boy, he's a sad sack.

NSFW
 
2003-01-17 03:33:59 AM
He needs help...

 
2003-01-17 03:36:08 AM
It's on the internet, so it must be true!

Talk about being far-fetched. Aliens landing at the White House is more believable than this.
 
2003-01-17 03:47:07 AM
I am going to see a run-through of Jimmy Kimmel Live on Tuesday. Can't wait. Did anyone hear him on Howard Stern when he talked about when he convinced Carson Daly to masturbate for the first time. Truly hilarious.
 
2003-01-17 04:59:40 AM
This guy has pain, lots of pain. He definitely needs therapy. GEAH's idea is good
 
2003-01-17 05:02:41 AM
There is bad sex. Drunken, hard to get it up sex with overweight women.

The horror! The horror!
*sobs*

Uhm... I'm talking about some guy I know, of course.
 
2003-01-17 05:03:50 AM
I also didn't like sex, but that is when I thought sex was slamming your hand in a door. When I learned what it really was it was great.
 
2003-01-17 05:04:06 AM
He will eventually wander into fark and find a home.
 
2003-01-17 05:06:24 AM
Malinois; My thoughts exactly... the guy is pure genious.
 
2003-01-17 05:06:39 AM
My heart just bleeds for that brave brave man .......

Perhaps he was taken out of context but he sounds like a man who would speak to a woman to get a root.

Perhaps the reporter was a sexy female chick ?

other then that the guys a dick head. Burn him
 
2003-01-17 05:10:41 AM
"He admits he just didn't turn on his wife, Gina."

well uh look at him.
 
2003-01-17 05:11:10 AM
if this is true, it's very, very sad. no one should have to live without getting laid.
 
2003-01-17 05:12:51 AM
Oh wow, it's a reprint of the Playboy article. In it he talks about the Man SHow, and how he hasn't had oral sex in fifteen years.

Geeze. Playboy was a better read.
 
2003-01-17 05:16:29 AM
Some people should not be allowed to partake of the miracle of orgasm...

You see fugly people with funny looking kids... and you wonder what kind of sexual experience that must have been...

My sexual experiences have always been so incredible I constantly find myself wanting more...
 
2003-01-17 05:20:18 AM
The skunky taste of Heinekin may lead to unpleasant sexual experiences

- and subsequently bad relationships

- and subsequently homosexuality
 
2003-01-17 05:23:03 AM
well if he frequently talked about how bad his sex life was no wonder he marriage didn't succeed.
 
2003-01-17 05:27:52 AM
Ken_Iseeum - If you've never had a bad lay, te salute!

/Sollozzo
 
2003-01-17 05:28:10 AM
Ken_Iseeum, yes Heineken may be the downfall of mankind itsellf
 
2003-01-17 05:29:52 AM
Ken_Iseeum, Heineken may also be the downfall of civilization as we know it, what i mean to say is why cant we all just drink good tasting refreshing beer.
 
2003-01-17 05:32:28 AM
Who's Jimmy Kimmel?
 
2003-01-17 05:34:47 AM
Oh. Now I've read the article... I think I know enough
 
2003-01-17 05:36:40 AM
in all honesty, my first time with sex was MISERABLE.


obviously, ive had much better experiences since then. but i think any male who tells me his first time was good is blowing smoke up my ass
 
2003-01-17 05:39:23 AM
I always wondered where they found this knucklehead when he showed up on the Fox NFL pregame show...

You shouldn't be allowed to be a host on "The Man Show" if you haven't experienced fellatio in > 15 years...
 
2003-01-17 05:42:55 AM
My first time was awkward, definitely... and my teacher may not have wrote about it in her diary...
But I certainly had an EPIPHANY !!
 
2003-01-17 05:44:06 AM
but i think any male who tells me his first time was good is blowing smoke up my ass

I'm sure some guys had to have had a good first experience. Cause I've been a guys first and he damn well didn't seem to be disappointed :P

Ya know I'd like to know why this guy...who doesn't enjoy sex....would get to host a show like the man show....but then again maybe he just likes "self love"
 
2003-01-17 05:45:19 AM
Really? His wife wasn't happy?

I thought being regularly portrayed as an annoying biatch on national TV as her husband drinks and yells for large breasted women to jump up and down would keep her satisfied!

I can never figure these broads out...
 
2003-01-17 05:50:09 AM
Well, he could get the job as host of the Man Show possibly because.... it's a show? It's not real? It's comedy/satire, and the people in it play a role which is a bit different from what they play in real life?... For example, if you met one of the juggies on the street, I doubt she'd dance and jump for you while giggling. Just a thought...

I hear the other host of the Man Show is actually gay... Of course, I heard that on the Daily show when he was a guest (he confirmed it), so it just depends which show you think is more honest.
 
2003-01-17 05:53:28 AM
http://thegoonies.nu/info/inspiration/

Personally, I find The Man Show to be hilarious and highly entertaining.
 
2003-01-17 05:53:49 AM
He's just trying to rally support (pity) for his hopeless challenge against Leno and Letterman
 
2003-01-17 06:02:19 AM
A few years ago comedy central did a Fryer's Club roast of Jerry Stiller. When it was Jimmy Kimmel's turn it seemed like he took it too seriously or something. It wasn't like the other comedians, where you could tell they were joking. I think he really hates the guy.

Everyone who saw it with me agreed. Granted, we were pretty drunk, so who knows.
 
2003-01-17 06:04:39 AM
i tried sex too. but i liked it. the real problem is trying to get sex, that's the part i don't like.
"and the man show is pretty pitiful," said Thereisnospoon, as he took a flying leap from his unique perch on the side of a deli, onto a passing banwagon, much like spiderman does.
 
2003-01-17 06:15:34 AM
Of course the romp cannot be properly completed unless both parties are equipped with the adequate tools for the job...

Maybe Jimmy has a small tool. tee hee hee

That explains it - case closed
 
Tia
2003-01-17 06:21:34 AM
He should have just said, "My penis tastes like chocolate."
 
2003-01-17 06:33:54 AM
My penis tastes like chocolate.

Well.. if chocolate was made out of penis, and stored in a crotxh for over 20 years.
 
2003-01-17 07:01:33 AM
[What the hell, DragonballZ became Alph? Wondered what happened to you.]
 
2003-01-17 07:06:43 AM
I feel bad for the guy, but I think TheRapy has a good point. You see certain celebs like Jimmy here and have to wonder, "how the heck does their wife/husband/s.o. feel about them doing this??"


Case in point: I work with a guy who is a huge Howard Stern fan. A long time back I remember asking him this question, since Howard has naked women running around the studios and propositioning him left and right. This guy proceeded to lecture me on how it was "just a job" and "a gimmick" that he'd built up over the years. His wife certainly understood!

Yeah. So later I happen to mention Stern and he admits that Stern and his wife are seperated/getting divorced. Who'd a thunk it?


Sorry Jimmy. I feel bad for ya man. I hope you realize that all work is no life at all before you're old and all alone.
 
2003-01-17 07:07:40 AM
Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure. I'm buyin' it.


not
 
2003-01-17 07:38:12 AM
Maybe if Kimmel had sex with Howie Long...
 
2003-01-17 07:44:17 AM
I'd believe it. Have you seen his wife? Even I wouldn't hit it. (Sorry, Jimmy.)
 
2003-01-17 07:45:57 AM
Maybe that's cuz you're not doing it right, Jimmy.
 
2003-01-17 07:48:54 AM
HAHAHHHAAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAAAAA...Man, that guy really cracks me up.
 
2003-01-17 07:51:27 AM
Ah, a credible source to be sure......
 
2003-01-17 07:52:28 AM
I tried sex and didn't like it, so I tried pot, but I didn't like it, then I tried ecstasy, but I didn't like it, so I got drunk, but I didn't like it, so I tried being famous, but I didn't like it, so I tried my own talk show, but it failed and I returned to obscurity with that Wayans guy and Arsenio....
 
2003-01-17 07:57:46 AM
Allow me to be the first to nominate Tia for a HERO tag. ;-)
 
2003-01-17 08:01:32 AM
or the much beloved, lopsided boobies tag
 
2003-01-17 08:13:04 AM
He should have just told his ex-wife, "I'm not gay, but I'll learn." Don't like sex, what the hell?!
 
2003-01-17 08:22:11 AM
In his honor, I had sex last night. For you Jimmie!
 
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