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(Oregon Live)   Three peole found dead in trailer. That is all. No details. They're just dead. Write (or photoshop) a better article for what happened to them. Voting enabled   (oregonlive.com ) divider line
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12720 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2003 at 5:58 PM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-01-16 06:00:40 PM  
Oh, I can't wait for these...
 
2003-01-16 06:02:19 PM  
Iraqi unmanned drones killed them.

hhehe.
 
2003-01-16 06:03:16 PM  
They dun got kilt.

(West Virginia voting enabled.)
 
2003-01-16 06:03:22 PM  
another three people fell victim to the rash of tv show copycat deaths when three Oregon men played "Don't Whiz on the Electric Fence" seen on Ren and Stimpy. When will it end?
 
2003-01-16 06:03:38 PM  
Boredom Kills 3
 
2003-01-16 06:04:27 PM  
With voting this time, for posterity:

"...police are following a trail of hubcaps they suspect will lead them to Tonya Harding..."
 
2003-01-16 06:04:41 PM  
Diet of refried beans and a broken air conditioner
 
2003-01-16 06:04:53 PM  
O.J. loved them all very much.
 
2003-01-16 06:06:34 PM  
JERRY!!! JERRY!!! JERRY!!!
 
2003-01-16 06:07:25 PM  
a jet-assisted takeoff device was found attached to the trailer, which was found in the side of a mountain.
 
2003-01-16 06:07:45 PM  
So much for that prize for investigative reporting.
 
2003-01-16 06:07:52 PM  
[image from mwscomp.com too old to be available]

"Three shall be dead, and the number of dead people shall be three. Four shall not be dead, nor shall there be two, except then another proceed to die. Five is right out."
 
2003-01-16 06:07:57 PM  
Trogdor burninated them.
 
2003-01-16 06:07:59 PM  
The families suspect foul play, but the coroner reports that peanuts have been found in the throats of the deceased.
 
2003-01-16 06:08:33 PM  
Perhaps they forgot to enable their voting.
 
2003-01-16 06:08:34 PM  
Three-hundred farker "peole" point out submitter's lack of spelling ability
 
2003-01-16 06:08:43 PM  
"...In other news, another three people have died after running into glass with cheese behind it."
 
2003-01-16 06:09:31 PM  
"Diane, it's 3:10 P.M., I'm on my way to Toppenish, where two women and a man were found dead in a trailer. God I love these Douglas Firs. And the cherry pie at the Stop & Eat diner on Route 12 will kill ya."
 
2003-01-16 06:09:40 PM  
"Three people were killed today when the 'Jackass' stunt they were performing, Mobile home catapulting, caused them to be thrown into a nearby wooded area. Film at 11."

Bwahahahhaa, I kill me
 
2003-01-16 06:09:55 PM  
An SUV ran into the trailer sending the occupants of the trailer flying out of the windows because they didn't have their seatbelts on and the SUV rolled over on them.
 
2003-01-16 06:10:20 PM  
Police at first suspected a Jonestown type suicide pact, because they found a lot of Kool-Aid packets lying around. They later dismissed this theory after they remembered the victims where trailer trash and Kool-aid was the only soft drink they could afford.
 
2003-01-16 06:11:19 PM  
They cursed at a humveee driver who followed them home and towed their skanky trailer into the woods.
 
2003-01-16 06:11:36 PM  
being from Oregon...

"Three men found dead from a toxic reaction to the lottery ticket stuff you scratch off the ticket. A letter dated two weeks ago stated the three hoped their mass purchases of lottery tickets would finally save the state from having to cut funding to public schools, roads, and the salaries of all elected officials."
 
2003-01-16 06:11:51 PM  
Ghosts of kittens past killed three chronic masturbators last night.
 
2003-01-16 06:11:54 PM  
[image from ohiovet.com too old to be available]

The news of what caused their deaths was not fit to print.
 
2003-01-16 06:11:55 PM  
Three people found dead in trailer


TOPPENISH, Wash. (AP) -- Two women and a man were found dead Thursday in a trailer near Toppenish, the Yakima County sheriff's office said.

The bodies were found by the manager of a mobile home park after he was alerted by the deceadents dog, known only as "Lassie".

Additional details were not immediately available, as "Lassie" was busy licking himself and scooting his ass across the carpet and could only comment "Ruff". Analysts tell us that this can be translated to "And now with voting"...
 
2003-01-16 06:12:09 PM  
"President Bush has already hailed the killings as 'unacceptable' and an attack against 'democratically-oriented peoples everywhere', vowing to pursue Al-Qa'ida. In other news, Tim Ridge of the Homeland Security Department has issued a blank terrorist warning in light of a perceived threat to liberties."
 
2003-01-16 06:12:22 PM  
In other news, scientists have discovered that the generations of successive inbreeding commonly found in trailer park inhabitants has led to a genetic deficiency in the immune systems of the subjects, leading to a decreased ability to fend off the toxic fumes emanating from the buried landfills the "communities" are typically built upon.
 
2003-01-16 06:12:26 PM  
Mobile home park + Yakima County = Lethal batch of meth cooked up in the kitchen/bedroom.
 
2003-01-16 06:12:58 PM  
The first three victims of the "War of the Penguins" have been found.

/got nuthin
 
2003-01-16 06:13:46 PM  
Spontaneous Darwin Combustion
 
2003-01-16 06:13:46 PM  
TOPPENISH, Wash. (AP) -- Two women and a man were found dead Thursday in a trailer near Toppenish, the Yakima County sheriff's office said.

The bodies were found by former FBI Agent Cooper, now a manager of a mobile home park, who became suspicious after his photo of Laura Palmer mysteriously vanished.
 
2003-01-16 06:13:51 PM  
"A man and his three step cousins were killed today when he attempted to use STRATEGERY to steal his neigbors lawn flamingos"

.../got nutin
 
2003-01-16 06:14:44 PM  
Further proof of what we've known all along, God hates trailer parks!
 
2003-01-16 06:15:00 PM  
[image from typhoon-restaurant.com too old to be available]

Visitors to the latest Toppenish, WA, dining establishment will be delighted by the rustic "Greater Washington Trailer Park" feel. Samples of the menu include "crisp and juicy" human remains, rare and seared. Topped with a "hearty" drippings based sauce, diners were barely distracted by the "pungent aroma of rotting flesh."

-Review submitted by H. Lecter
 
2003-01-16 06:15:01 PM  
Police are baffled, since each of the prime suspects for any murder in the greater Portland area had an airtight alibi: TrailBlazers 97 Knicks 84

NOW WITH TASTY VOTING!!!!
 
2003-01-16 06:15:12 PM  
Three people found dead in trailer

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NewsFlash Home | More Oregon News

Oregon News
Three people found dead in trailer

The Associated Press
1/16/03 4:40 PM


TOPPENISH, Wash. (AP) -- Two women and a man were found dead Thursday in a trailer near Toppenish, the Yamaha County sheriff, Officer Roscoe P. Coletrain said.

The bodies were found by the manager of a mobile home park, a Mr. "Boss" Hogg.

Additional details were not immediately available.
 
2003-01-16 06:15:37 PM  
Died of cabin fever, common in the Pacific Northwest wintertime.
 
2003-01-16 06:16:13 PM  
the quizzical dog...did it [/nothing have i]

now with voting
 
2003-01-16 06:16:52 PM  
"three people drowned in the shallow end of the gene pool today...."

In other news the world is a better place
 
2003-01-16 06:17:38 PM  
TOPPENISH, Wash. (AP) -- Two women and a man were found dead Thursday in a trailer near Toppenish, the Yakima County sheriff's office said.

The three bodies were bound together with duct tape and each had been shot once between the eyes. The sheriff's office suspects foul play.

In other news, Toppenish, Wash. was removed from the US Bureau of Geographical Names listing today. A spokesman for the Bureau stated that the population of Toppenish was officially zero, and there never was a real need for a name for a single trailer home site. The Post Office announced that mail presently destined for Toppenish would go to the dead letter office in Seattle.
 
2003-01-16 06:18:11 PM  
DaveoftheHillPeople

Very strong, got my vote!
 
2003-01-16 06:18:12 PM  
"Oddly enough, an 8-track of Led Zeppelin 4 was found, with "Stairway to Heaven" playing when the police arrived."
 
2003-01-16 06:20:20 PM  
"This is a job for TrailerPark Trash Man!"
 
2003-01-16 06:21:20 PM  
Associated Press Reporter Not Nominated For Pulitzer.
 
2003-01-16 06:22:16 PM  
By the way, see that dog over there with the shifty eyes?

Personally, I suspect the dog.

[image from newspringfield.com too old to be available]
 
2003-01-16 06:22:21 PM  
Three people found dead in trailer


TOPPENISH, Wash. (AP) -- Two women and a man were found dead Thursday in a trailer near Toppenish, the Yakima County sheriff's office said. Police were not able to immediately recover the bodies, as access to the trailer was hindered by the seven rotting husks of "Trans-Camaros" buried in five foot grass and the twenty-seven inbred dogs on the front porch.

The bodies were found by the manager of a mobile home park.

Additional details were not immediately available.
 
2003-01-16 06:23:55 PM  
[image from copland.udel.edu too old to be available]
 
2003-01-16 06:24:31 PM  
Who was the murderer?

[image from pmpnetwork.com too old to be available]

You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
 
2003-01-16 06:25:49 PM  
A Liberal, an SUV driver and a smoker walk into a trailer...
In no way does the start to this "joke" imply that I wish death to liberals, smokers or SUV drivers. Just seems they are the biggest biatch and/or complaints today
 
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