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(CBS 2)   Pure Pleasure adult bookstore offering clergy discount.   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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5882 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2003 at 7:46 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

71 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-01-16 04:54:46 PM  
Pure Pleasure Pornography Presents a Plethora of Provacative Pastorial Purchases Probably Providing Plenty of Pandre's Potential Penis Play.

[/wipes monitor]
2003-01-16 07:48:27 PM  
"I just hope I'm not too close when the lightning strikes."

That's mighty Christian of ya, Reverend.
2003-01-16 07:50:26 PM  
What about an ordained minister discount?
2003-01-16 07:50:54 PM  
...but the discount can only be applied towards the kiddie department...
2003-01-16 07:52:06 PM's better than you know what.

P.S. Good one Bump!
2003-01-16 07:54:44 PM  
HAHAHA those religious morons. Trying to abstain from sex is like trying to abstain from breathing. No wander most of them are screwed up in the head.
2003-01-16 07:55:44 PM  
Nowhere in the bible does it say sex is bad.... the bible might have certain rules regarding sex, but since the bible is fiction... who cares?
2003-01-16 07:56:13 PM  
Some people just can't take a joke. Oh yeah, these are the folks that used to burn people at the stake for now obeying the Church's rules.
2003-01-16 07:56:30 PM  
Cardinal Law called...wants to know if you got any early Maculley Culkin.
2003-01-16 07:56:40 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-01-16 07:57:06 PM  
Bwahaha! Nearly fell off my chair laughing - quality quotes :-)
2003-01-16 07:57:31 PM  
Are they really breakign any laws by advertising in poor taste outside of a church?
2003-01-16 07:57:41 PM  
Fuzzygirl, the problem is that a lot of folks don't understand that it is fiction. There is no god.
2003-01-16 07:58:31 PM  
Relgious flamewar ahead. Taking bets on under/over.
2003-01-16 08:00:40 PM  
Need a line for the O/U Osiris
2003-01-16 08:00:50 PM  
"I just hope I'm not too close when the lightning strikes."

Yeah, keep waiting you religious jackarse.
2003-01-16 08:03:20 PM  
that is too too funny. I'd get a major chuckle out of those signs. Wonder if they'll give ordained ministers a discount...and if they have a website....but I hope if there is a discount it isn't just on gay porn.
2003-01-16 08:04:39 PM  
the church should just put up the sign

"the church agrees... the best position is on your knees."

does anyone have that picture? its so funny
2003-01-16 08:07:31 PM  
I'd love to go back in time to 1965 for a day just so I could go around calling everyone in the senate a gay boy.
2003-01-16 08:09:39 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

WHat would Guido Say?
2003-01-16 08:12:29 PM  
i live 10 miles from this store, the entire town is trying hard to get rid of the store
2003-01-16 08:13:27 PM  
I can't help but wonder what that church has been up to that caused them to put up the sign. I'll bet the backstory is more interesting.
2003-01-16 08:14:20 PM  
ULC ministers qualify for the discount, right?
(didn't read the article, yet)
2003-01-16 08:18:24 PM  
Creamcheeseinpanties. take pictures.

Usnafoster04. I wouldn't be surprised if there is a zoning ordinance against it. I'm even surprised that an adult store is able to be so close to a church.
2003-01-16 08:23:27 PM  
There was a long fight to get the store opened. Letters to the editor were in the paper for quite a while in Rochester which is very close by. I love how everyone claims no one wants a sex store in town but obviously it does enough business to stay open. Of course, considering the size of Stewartville a lot of their business is probably NIMBYs who don't mind the drive.
2003-01-16 08:25:43 PM  
here you go fuzzy..

doin it buddah style!
2003-01-16 08:26:28 PM  
Maybe if the clergy can get their sexual release with pornography, it might cut down a bit on their child molesting.

It sounds like that store is doing a great service to the community. This needs a hero tag.
2003-01-16 08:28:57 PM  
Unlike churches, sex shops pay property taxes which provide police and fire protection.
2003-01-16 08:29:53 PM  
NegativeZero My sentiments exactly.

Seriously, where in the bible does it say that masturbation is bad? Bevets, can you help me on this one?
2003-01-16 08:31:26 PM  
IHOP's (international houses of porn), rarely do this sort of thng without some sort of religious instigation, so I'm betting that the Reverand's flock have been farking with them for awhile.

Anyways, it is a great sign. And remember, kids: The bible is FICTION. I've read Lord of the Rings, you don't see me transporting an assload of golden rings to a volcano, now do you?
2003-01-16 08:32:38 PM  
They should slick priests anatomics, then we wont have all these problems.
2003-01-16 08:33:29 PM  
Aqueduct_Pocket: It has something to do with Ohan or Oban or whoever the fark he was 'spilling his seed' when God ordered him to impregenate his dead brother's wife. It angered God, who slew Mr. O, and now semen not used to make babies is a no-no.
2003-01-16 08:35:35 PM  
I think some brothel in Nevada offers discounts to politicians.
2003-01-16 08:37:21 PM  
It angered God, who slew Mr. O, and now semen not used to make babies is a no-no.

yeah thats why using birth control methods is bad too....

I wonder how many clerics have taken advantage of the discount..and how much of one it was. They should have said. Cause a puny 1% or something wouldn't worth it can get that online...but 25% or something....
2003-01-16 08:37:48 PM  
It's not much of a discount; It hardly covers the extra gas.
2003-01-16 08:40:33 PM  
"I just hope I'm not too close when the lightning strikes."

Well, if God was perfect, then he wouldn't harm you. Unless he can see that you're a total moron and actually wants to harm you in order to make the world a better place.
2003-01-16 08:41:21 PM  
100% free alter boys for the clergy...
/going to hell...
2003-01-16 08:41:43 PM  
Anyways, it is a great sign. And remember, kids: The bible is FICTION. I've read Lord of the Rings, you don't see me transporting an assload of golden rings to a volcano, now do you?

cmon man its just the one ring.

the ONE ring... and its Mt. Doom, located deep in the heart of Mordor, land of Sauron and his evil minions, and...

Im a farking geek loser.
2003-01-16 08:50:50 PM  
Ah, I see the miltant Atheists have come out to play.

But for a real flamewar, we need Bevets. Until then, its at best a spark-war.
2003-01-16 09:01:16 PM  
"I just hope I'm not too close when the lightning strikes."

I think by lightning he means, "terrorist-piloted 747's."
2003-01-16 09:02:15 PM  
Eat a corpse/fark a nun.
2003-01-16 09:04:01 PM  
All these good people are getting cranked up just because of the sign poking a little fun at them. Imagine if the sign advertised pictures of the Baby Jesus Butt Plug (To which the dicount doesn't apply. Dammit.) or the Jackhammer Jesus Didldo.
2003-01-16 09:12:07 PM  
Fr._Peter_Fitznuggly, I guess the girl from The Exorsist has a new tow. ^_^

Do they have blow up alter-boys?
/hell is this way? what? just follow the signs? ok
2003-01-16 09:13:54 PM  
Firefily6: I'll try to take some pictures tomorrow.
2003-01-16 09:15:46 PM  
Clergy discount? That's religious discrimination! Dammit, I gots me a right to porn just like any other American!
2003-01-16 09:20:30 PM  
Ha! Fr._Peter_Fitznuggly, those are hilarious! In So-vee-yet Rush-uh, Baby Jesus makes you cry!
2003-01-16 09:23:42 PM  
JInxedLynx: and the silicone is not only more comfortable, but much safer that the wood and metal crucifix.
2003-01-16 09:25:29 PM  

Now, now, you sinners, don't you know the Catechism of the Catholic Church has all the answers? Masturbation, says the Church, is a grievous sin against the Sixth Commandment. But don't take *my* word for it:

2352: By MASTURBATION is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. "Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action."[137] "The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose." For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of "the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved."[138]

And also:

2354: PORNOGRAPHY consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public), since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials.

Thanks for the legal suggestion. Will you be paying your taxes now or later?

2003-01-16 09:33:01 PM  
This deserves a hero tag.

2003-01-16 09:48:16 PM  
We just got one of these stores in Duluth right up on the highway north of the city. They have a humongous electronic sign that is incredibly obnoxious. It makes baby jesus suck on cyanide.
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