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(BBC)   Teacher tells children the truth about Santa Claus. (Warning: spoiler in article)   (news.bbc.co.uk) divider line
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13096 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Dec 2008 at 10:12 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-12-11 07:26:40 PM  
Yes, fire the biatch! We can't have teachers telling the truth to students!

/gets popcorn
 
2008-12-11 07:34:53 PM  
Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.
 
2008-12-11 07:38:15 PM  
Santa had a sex change and changed his name to Santa Rosalia? Santa employs illegal elf labor? When Santa moved to Hollywood he had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast? What exactly about Santa? Tell me!

/DRTFA
 
2008-12-11 07:39:24 PM  

Cyberluddite: Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.


Oh wait, that's the dude that had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast. Sorry, Santa, I know you're a sick puppy, but you have some limits to your depravity.
 
2008-12-11 09:17:06 PM  
I'm as cynical as the next person. But, wow. That is some big time douche baggery.

It's not her place to tell students that.
 
2008-12-11 10:16:33 PM  
This is the case material of lawyers' dreams
 
2008-12-11 10:18:16 PM  
Okay. I give up. What's a female supply teacher?
 
2008-12-11 10:18:40 PM  

Solid State Vittles: Santa had a sex change and changed his name to Santa Rosalia? Santa employs illegal elf labor? When Santa moved to Hollywood he had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast? What exactly about Santa? Tell me!

/DRTFA


Santa Claus runs a tab for you and when you're older you have to pay him back. That's why adults are always working.
 
2008-12-11 10:18:44 PM  
Holy Mother of Dog!

I mean really, let them enjoy the little bit of pleasure childhood brings. They will be stressed-out wrinklebags soon enough.
 
2008-12-11 10:19:00 PM  

mamoru: Yes, fire the biatch! We can't have teachers telling the truth to students!


^ Something like that. ^
 
2008-12-11 10:19:05 PM  

Runs_With_Scissors_: I'm as cynical as the next person. But, wow. That is some big time douche baggery.

It's not her place to tell students that.


Why?


/seriously, I want to hear this
 
2008-12-11 10:19:33 PM  
This is outrageous, this story needs to be on the front page of every newspaper in the world with the headline, "TEACHER FIRED FOR REVEALING SANTA DOES NOT EXIST", as a warning to others wanting to spoil the magic of christmas. What a travesty.
 
2008-12-11 10:20:21 PM  
Dear Editor- I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Great Cthulhu. Papa says, "If you see it on Alt.Horror.Cthulhu, it's so," Please tell me the truth, is there a Great Cthulhu who will rise from the watery depth of the Pacific to clear the Earth of all living things? --- Virginia Marsh

Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the fever of enlightenment given to them by a so-called "enlightened" age. They do not believe in anything unless it carries the weight of scientific authority. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. Reality is that which can be cataloged and measured, to be spooned out in rational doses to the common people. All minds, Virginia, whether they be adult's or children's, are little. In this vast chaos we laughingly call the universe, man is a mere insect, a bug, whose intellect has as much chance of grasping the whole truth, as an ant has of understanding non-Euclidian geometry.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Great Cthulhu. He exists as certainly as the cold unfeelingness of the cosmos exists, and you know that this meaninglessness abounds and gives to your life its highest absurdity. Alas! How comfortable would be the world if there were no Cthulhu! It would be as comforting as if a Santa Claus truly did care and reward children for doing good. There would be childlike faith then, a world of sweet believable poetry and romance to make existence idyllic and appealing. The external light with which childhood fills the world would never end.

Not believe in the Great Cthulhu! You might as well not believe in Hastur or the Necronomicon. You might get your papa's science books and Skeptical Inquirers to see if Cthulhu is mentioned in any historical contexts or if R'lyeh truly does rest under the Pacific Ocean, but even if you did not find either mentioned in your 'holy' books, what would that prove? Nobody sees or knows of Cthulhu, but that is no sign that there is no Great Cthulhu. The most real things in the world are those that we can not know through the senses. Can the headache of your friend be felt by you? No, but his pain affects your life regardless. Do you feel the angst of living a life you never wanted through any of your five senses? No, yet the despair remains. Yet if such realities are known but are never seen, then why should other's ignorance of the unseen lead us to share in their blindness. By what right have they earned your obedience? Nobody can conceive of the inconceivable, including your leaders of thought.
You tear apart the rattle of a baby to see what lies inside to make such noise, but the tiny balls there can not explain or illustrate the fear of a hostile world, that makes that baby clutch and shake that rattle so. Only reaching for insanity can push aside the curtain of our hopes and view with stark madness the emptiness that lies beyond. Is that reality? Is that the truth? To give an answer is to replace the curtain with but one more. And it is this, that makes the Great Cthulhu as true and as real as any veil we place on the chaos beyond. If one must create a meaning, why not the Great Cthulhu. At least the choice is free.

Thank Azathoth! The Great Cthulhu lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to await the time when the stars are right again. For with those which eternal lie, with strange eons even death may die.

(From Editorial Page, Arkham Advertiser, 1928)
 
2008-12-11 10:21:40 PM  
Hmm, even the ID/creationism-in-school crowd wasn't so rabid as to want teachers *fired* for teaching the truth.
 
2008-12-11 10:21:43 PM  

johntodd: Holy Mother of Dog!

I mean really, let them enjoy the little bit of pleasure childhood brings. They will be stressed-out wrinklebags soon enough.


Why lie to children? They don't appreciate the lie when they find out the truth. When I was in high school as a sophomore, I commanded this freshman (who was a dick by the way) to tell a bunch of pre-kindergarten kids (they had a program for that at the high school) that Santa wasn't real as they were leaving the classroom...after singing a Christmas carol. He did it, and some of the kids were upset. I laughed.
 
2008-12-11 10:21:53 PM  
Did her story go something like this?
 
2008-12-11 10:22:30 PM  
$700 Billion to the Banks , more to AIG and the Big Three...

Don't tell ME there isn't a Santa Claus!
 
2008-12-11 10:23:22 PM  

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: johntodd: Holy Mother of Dog!

I mean really, let them enjoy the little bit of pleasure childhood brings. They will be stressed-out wrinklebags soon enough.

Why lie to children? They don't appreciate the lie when they find out the truth. When I was in high school as a sophomore, I commanded this freshman (who was a dick by the way) to tell a bunch of pre-kindergarten kids (they had a program for that at the high school) that Santa wasn't real as they were leaving the classroom...after singing a Christmas carol. He did it, and some of the kids were upset. I laughed.


Did you spend the rest of your teenage years pulling wings off flies?
 
2008-12-11 10:23:24 PM  

Metaluna Mutant: (From Editorial Page, Arkham Advertiser, 1928)


That. Was. Awesome.
 
2008-12-11 10:23:24 PM  
It was either that, or try to explain the whole basis for Kwanzaa.
 
2008-12-11 10:23:49 PM  

Cyberluddite: Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.


Wat?
 
2008-12-11 10:24:03 PM  
Metaluna Mutant

Awesome.
 
2008-12-11 10:24:27 PM  

Cyberluddite: Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.


THIS
 
2008-12-11 10:24:37 PM  
If this kid was in church, I'd completely agree. Church is the place to learn about fantasy, magic, etc. But this was a SCHOOL. You go to school to learn facts about the world. I can't think of a more appropriate place for a child to learn that his parents lied to them than school. Yes it's tradition and blah blah blah...really, that's ADORABLE. But if you're concerned your kids might learn facts at a school, don't send them to schools.
 
2008-12-11 10:24:44 PM  
I think the revelation alone to children that there is no Santa Claus is singularly to large for them to take into perspective. Most kids are too young to work through such information to any realization beyond what they are told. They need to know that although his *magic* doesn't exist, they have family that care about them enough to take on the burden of bringing mystery to their life and giving them gifts unlike what they see throughout the rest of the year.

/either that or the parents are caving to societal pressure to dump gobs of money on presents for the little buggers.
 
2008-12-11 10:24:48 PM  

Cyberluddite: Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.


themuttsnuts.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
2008-12-11 10:24:50 PM  

Richard Saunders: Okay. I give up. What's a female supply teacher?


I'm guessing they're the ones who show the girls how tampons are used.
 
2008-12-11 10:25:22 PM  
In return for today's nerd/redhead thread

i16.photobucket.comView Full Size

miasmaticreview.mu.nuView Full Size

i5.photobucket.comView Full Size


/santa-eroticism is pretty hilarious
 
2008-12-11 10:25:55 PM  
I would rather have found out from the teacher; instead I found out about there being no Santa at the age of six. My mom left a parenting magazine out on the coffee table w/ an article about how to tell your kids that Santa isn't real. That will teach you to teach your kids to read at a young age.

Thinking back though, the expression on my mom's face was priceless.
 
2008-12-11 10:26:08 PM  

IXI Jim IXI: Richard Saunders: Okay. I give up. What's a female supply teacher?

I'm guessing they're the ones who show the girls how tampons are used.


that was good for a +snort
 
2008-12-11 10:26:54 PM  

whatshisname: TeddyRooseveltsMustache: johntodd: Holy Mother of Dog!

I mean really, let them enjoy the little bit of pleasure childhood brings. They will be stressed-out wrinklebags soon enough.

Why lie to children? They don't appreciate the lie when they find out the truth. When I was in high school as a sophomore, I commanded this freshman (who was a dick by the way) to tell a bunch of pre-kindergarten kids (they had a program for that at the high school) that Santa wasn't real as they were leaving the classroom...after singing a Christmas carol. He did it, and some of the kids were upset. I laughed.

Did you spend the rest of your teenage years pulling wings off flies?


No, what's funny about that?
 
2008-12-11 10:27:04 PM  
I don't think I would tell my children to begin with. I was lied to way too often as a child.
 
2008-12-11 10:27:47 PM  
My parents never did the Santa thing with me, but my sister (who's 8 years younger), they did. And my sister was terrified of the mall Santas. Seriously, she'd go into fits around them.

The whole thing strikes me as absurd, and if I were a teacher, I certainly wouldn't support this Santa nonsense.

johntodd: I mean really, let them enjoy the little bit of pleasure childhood brings. They will be stressed-out wrinklebags soon enough.


What does this have to do with anything? What, the mysterious old man who will reward or punish you based on information provided by his global network of spies is a pleasure of childhood? Or do kids enjoy being taken advantage of by their seniors?
 
2008-12-11 10:28:45 PM  
My seven year old is constantly after me about whether Santa and God really exist. I mean, usually, you figure this out when you are older. What am I supposed to say?

.
 
2008-12-11 10:28:50 PM  

Solid State Vittles: Cyberluddite: Well, at least she she didn't let the cat out of the bag about that whole Jesus thing.

Oh wait, that's the dude that had to go door to door to tell everyone he was a pederast. Sorry, Santa, I know you're a sick puppy, but you have some limits to your depravity.


You don't think Santa is a pedo? He sneaks into houses at night and leaves presents for little kids. Plus he goes to malls and has kids hop up on his lap to tell him what it is they want from him.
 
2008-12-11 10:29:04 PM  
Wasn't this done last year and the year before???

This guy still isn't as bad as the biatch from last year or the year before who was a substitute teacher who read the kids a christmas story, and started it out with "There is no Santa" speech, telling the kids that she doesn't believe in lying to kids.

Me, I've ordered some reindeer meat that should arrive tomorrow, my nieces are coming over here for Christmas eve dinner. Tell those girls that dinner is one of Santa's reindeer then send them all home to their parents/my sister. This is why I love being an uncle. All the fun, none of the bad stuff.

Side note: My sister and her husband have put an iron clad rule in place that this will be a 'Hannah Montana Free Christmas'. Again, I don't like my sister, I don't like her husband, and Christmas is really for the children. I've stocked up on Hannah Montana wrapping paper, Hannah Montana girls clothes, and the most annoying Hannah Montana musical toys that I can find. My sister and her worthless husband can't do jack shiat to get back at me. Bonus: my step mom is also buying Hannah Montana stuff for the girls also. I think this could get me to start liking Christmas again.
 
2008-12-11 10:29:27 PM  
If a kid asks if Santa is real, is the teacher supposed to lie and say he is? If a child asks some reasonable question about how Santa could travel around the world or get into people's houses, is the teacher supposed to make up some elaborate, ridiculous, and false explanation?

The article doesn't say exactly how the reveal went down but it could've been something completely reasonable.
 
2008-12-11 10:29:30 PM  

The Grinch: Metaluna Mutant

Awesome.


t3knomanser: Metaluna Mutant: (From Editorial Page, Arkham Advertiser, 1928)

That. Was. Awesome.

farm4.static.flickr.comView Full Size
 
2008-12-11 10:30:05 PM  

DistendedPendulusFrenulum: My seven year old is constantly after me about whether Santa and God really exist. I mean, usually, you figure this out when you are older. What am I supposed to say?

.


I'd imagine the safest response would be "Shut up, you little shiat, and get me another beer!"
 
2008-12-11 10:30:42 PM  
There is no right way to respond to that type of question... Probably the best response would be to dodge, say thats something you should ask your parents...
 
2008-12-11 10:30:51 PM  

cycledesign: If a kid asks if Santa is real, is the teacher supposed to lie and say he is?


Teacher could have said "What do you think?" or "Each person has their own opinion."
 
2008-12-11 10:31:00 PM  
Well, at least she didn't fark the kid.
 
2008-12-11 10:31:10 PM  

IXI Jim IXI: DistendedPendulusFrenulum: My seven year old is constantly after me about whether Santa and God really exist. I mean, usually, you figure this out when you are older. What am I supposed to say?

.

I'd imagine the safest response would be "Shut up, you little shiat, and get me another beer!"


Lulz I just graded a final exam that was an expository essay titled "Lifetime Free Beer and Pizza for Professors--A Proposal."

.
 
2008-12-11 10:31:44 PM  

Metaluna Mutant: The Grinch: Metaluna Mutant

Awesome.

t3knomanser: Metaluna Mutant: (From Editorial Page, Arkham Advertiser, 1928)

That. Was. Awesome.


Santa, God, Jesus, Virgin Births? All fake.
Cthullhu, Azathoth, Hastur, the Color Out of Space? That shiat is all real.
 
2008-12-11 10:33:03 PM  
Well, let us look at this from a true secularists' perspective and be honest. We come into the "religion in public schools" threads all the time and bemoan the act of making children pray, say "under God", or learn creationism as a fact in their classes. We're clearly opposed to the teaching of mythology as if it's true, and we're willing to complain mighty loud about when a school breaks that rule of secularism.

So how is this any different? The teacher told them the truth behind a myth. She opted not to teach that myth as if it were fact. She stuck by secularism in the most literal sense.

She wasn't lying to the kids. In fact, the teacher was setting them on the path to truth. What she said was 100% factual. All she did "wrong" was refusing to hold up a lie told by parents.

And why do parents tell the Santa lie?

At first, I think it's a sense of wonder and whimsy. They say Santa is coming because it's a fun game.

And then, as the kids get older, it becomes a sort of reward/punishment system. "Behave or Santa won't visit" is just parent-speak for "I'll give you a Nintendo Wii if you shut up and do as you're told."

Later, it becomes a perverse lie that parents go to extremes to maintain-- Not because they're enjoying the childrens' ignorance of the truth, but because they're enjoying not being held responsible when the gifts don't pan out the way the children imagined. "Didn't get that Big Wheel? It's all Santa's doing. I know you were good, but I guess Santa didn't have any Big Wheels this year."

By the time they've been through a few Christmases, the kids are fully indoctrinated consumer whores, thanks to Jolly Ol' Saint Nick and his rewards for good behavior.

Santa Claus also has one more function in our society-- He, along with the Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy-- are the kid-friendly introductions to faith as a lifestyle.

If you BELIEVE in Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy, and you BEHAVE, you'll be REWARDED. Year after year, holiday after holiday, the myths are piled into childrens' brains and they're indoctrinated through these little games.

After Santa and his friends, it's no stretch to teach a kid that Jesus is real, too. If you BELIEVE in Jesus, and you BEHAVE, then you'll be REWARDED.

Santa is just training wheels for religious faith.

If you ask me, the teacher was doing those kids a favor.
 
2008-12-11 10:33:27 PM  

JesusTheChrist: cycledesign: If a kid asks if Santa is real, is the teacher supposed to lie and say he is?

Teacher could have said "What do you think?" or "Each person has their own opinion."


I guess I'm just a weirdo who thinks you shouldn't lie to your children.
 
2008-12-11 10:34:06 PM  
Ok, these kids were seven, not three or four. Let kids be kids, get dirty, get in trouble, whatever; I actually think kids are forced to grow up to early in this commercialized/sexualized/sectarian modern world, but there is a difference between make believe and cognitive density. If a seven year old hasn't put two and two together, then they need a little help, not riding the short bus help or anything, but some sort of remedial reasoning exercises or something.
 
2008-12-11 10:35:45 PM  

cycledesign: If a kid asks if Santa is real, is the teacher supposed to lie and say he is? If a child asks some reasonable question about how Santa could travel around the world or get into people's houses, is the teacher supposed to make up some elaborate, ridiculous, and false explanation?


While I was substitute teaching in primary school I had classes that would swing themselves off onto theological discussions (mostly about how God created the Earth and Heaven and such). Rather than refuting it, the tactic that I (and later found that other teachers) used was just change the damn topic. Press on with the lesson. Kids have attention spans of seconds. Tell them to ask you about it at the end of the lesson and they will never ever bring it up.
 
2008-12-11 10:35:50 PM  
I would like to have a serious discussion about the pointlessness of continuing the Santa Claus myth as children become increasingly information-savvy. But, this is Fark, so: holy coont-balls, anyone who feeds their kid this bullshiat is a Grade-A douchebag.
 
2008-12-11 10:36:06 PM  

cycledesign: JesusTheChrist: cycledesign: If a kid asks if Santa is real, is the teacher supposed to lie and say he is?

Teacher could have said "What do you think?" or "Each person has their own opinion."

I guess I'm just a weirdo who thinks you shouldn't lie to your children.


i agree, you shouldn't. But I also believe that it's not the teacher's place to overstep the bounds of the parents' wishes unless there is severe harm being done to a child. Is believing in Santa really severe harm?

Personally, I abhor the part of the Santa myth about "naughty and nice", but I don't go around dispelling it to kids at my school who believe.
 
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