I remember a kid back in grade school who would practically eat the farkin' things.

Another attempt to curb the dental problems of England?

Popups, script errors and another popup from that site.

/IE7

Is our kids chewing?

GoBadgers: I remember a kid back in grade school who would practically eat the farkin' things.

/you went to my school?

It's John Voight's pencil...

I don't see how this will make them concentrate more. If they started out with a normal pencil and chewed on it, the next time the pick up the pencil they're still going to chew on it again even though they can see the marks left behind from last time.

This makes no sense to me...

Isn't this like those jeans that already have holes in the knees when you buy them? Just another shortcut for the rich, while us poor still have to get holes in our jeans and tooth marks in our pencils the old-fashioned way. WE EARN IT.

/hates spoiled, lazy farkoffs
//read 'envies'

wait...kids know what pencils are still????? Wow....I thought they were all becoming these little pre-programmed computer-robot thingees that can't feel or think. Also hearing they lack courage and just want to get home to Auntie Em and Uncle Henry.

Jon Voight the dentist!

Too busy to use the space bar?

Who do they pay to pre-chew the pencils?

That is such a great idea, so well thought out, even the part to leave out an eraser on the pencil, because "if kids concentrate more" (because of pre-chewed pencil), they won't need an eraser.

vaconex: Popups, script errors and another popup from that site.

/IE7

That's your punishment for using IE.

I chewed pencils (and now chew pens) when I'm concentrating, so pre chewing it isn't going to help me concentrate better.

/just me tho

Crashdown: Who do they pay to pre-chew the pencils?

Mexicans. They chew the pencils that lazy Americans don't want to.

Anyone remember pencil fights? I ended up painting one with like 15 coats of crap to be the Grand Champion of 3rd grade.

So are they going to come out with pre-mangled mechanical pencils and pens, too?

stratospaly
Anyone remember pencil fights? I ended up painting one with like 15 coats of crap to be the Grand Champion of 3rd grade.

That would've got you disqualified in my school, at least until you got a new pencil.

I hope some genius doesn't come up with the pre-chewed on straw. You gotta draw the line somewhere.

This won't help.

You have to bite down on the pencil so that your own teeth marks are in it, so that later when your doing somehting important, you put the pencil in your mouth, and when you find that spot where you bit down and lock it in, that's when the creative juices start flowing.

That was a long sentence.

In related news: Microsoft is planning to launch a new browser which has already viewed all of the time-wasting sites on the web.

This ought to increase our productivity.

'thesedays'?

Is that the (mysteriously absent from my life) eighth day of the week?

buenohead: In related news: Microsoft is planning to launch a new browser which has already viewed all of the time-wasting sites on the web.

This ought to increase our productivity.

So all the porn on the web is bookmarked? No wonder it took them 25 years.

chachi88: Jon Voight the dentist!

Came here for this...

I didn't chew my pencils because I thought it was gross. Other people I knew didn't chew their pencils because they thought it was gross. Someone some day will need to borrow a pencil either to write something down or they were scatterbrained from studying for the final all week. It's almost common courtesy not to chew your pencil.

/We chewed gum instead.
//Loudly.
///Anti-gum chewers claimed it was gross. Almost a common courtesy not to chew gum.
//Most of them smoked, instead.
/And the beat goes on.

Where's the damn eraser?

FTA: Boss Mark Champkins said: "We began to look at the reasons that children might be distracted, uncomfortable or unable to focus in lessons - and we set about designing some simple, cost-effective products to address some of the problems.

My solution: Low-cut blouses on hot teachers.

/they'll know fractions and where babies come from

fluffoh: I didn't chew my pencils because I thought it was gross. Other people I knew didn't chew their pencils because they thought it was gross. Someone some day will need to borrow a pencil either to write something down or they were scatterbrained from studying for the final all week. It's almost common courtesy not to chew your pencil.

/We chewed gum instead.
//Loudly.
///Anti-gum chewers claimed it was gross. Almost a common courtesy not to chew gum.
//Most of them smoked, instead.
/And the beat goes on.

so i need to not chew my pencil because someone else might need to borrow it? that's like telling me i'm being rude by biting my fingernails because someone might shake my hand. at least when i have a pen or pencil in my mouth i'm not gnawing on my farking fingers.

/originally wrote "pencil" as "penile." paging dr. freud

Yeah, this is about as stupid as those "worn in" jeans and shirts. Are they going to make ceiling tiles with pencils pre-stuck in them as well.

Am I the only person that has heard "rubber-head" (as used in the headline) as a racial slur for Attractive and Successful African Americans?

Kozaru: Crashdown: Who do they pay to pre-chew the pencils?

Mexicans. They chew the pencils that lazy Americans don't want to.

Those lazy Americans just want to know when ABC gum will finally be available.

Arnie_Apesacrappin: Am I the only person that has heard "rubber-head" (as used in the headline) as a racial slur for Attractive and Successful African Americans?

I guess so. I had no idea what "rubber-head" was supposed to mean.

/Wouldn't "Velcro-head" be a more accurate slur?

Stopped reading after this: We know it's daft

/But it was far, far too late

Erasers sold separately I guess.

The erasers were pre-erased?

I actually watched one of my friends eat a pencil when he was really drunk. The best part was afterwards when he said that the pencil was stale.

how does this stop them from chewing prechewed pencils?

que lastima:

so i need to not chew my pencil because someone else might need to borrow it? that's like telling me i'm being rude by biting my fingernails because someone might shake my hand. at least when i have a pen or pencil in my mouth i'm not gnawing on my farking fingers.
/originally wrote "pencil" as "penile." paging dr. freud


Again, the emphasis was on irrational things I find gross, and people who then find what I find a rational substitute to be irrationally gross and so on and so forth. The idea of having something pre-chewed for you or at least seemingly so is like someone having sneezed on their hands (or seemingly so) a moment before they were going to shake your hand. I'm sure their intentions weren't malicious, but it's still gross to me.

/As gross as if someone made pre-"used" kleenex tissues.
//Kinda like fake vomit-- well intentioned grossness.
///Or a "used" condom that you find on your bathroom floor after a party because the guy was too drunk to hit the wastebasket but sober enough to remember to be safe.
//Now I'm going off on a tangent.
/Hahaha: "Penile."

I chewed my pencils for the same reason I chewed my nails, hangnails, and hair, jiggled my leg, drummed my fingers, and generally fiddled with everything in reach: I think better when I'm doing something, anything. Nowadays I go for a walk when I need to jump-start my brain, but of course I couldn't do that in school: it's vitally important for TYOT (the youth of today) to learn how to sit down and shut up. So, leg-jiggling and pencil-chewing ahoy!

/doesn't have a cubicle job
//would probably accidentally destroy the cube anyway
///or drive everyone else postal

kagemaru026: lock

Thank FSM, I thought I was the only one that did that

While some of you may see a stupid idea, I see a new job opportunity.

/Used to be really good at it I guess?
//Where do I apply?