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(Independent) NewsFlash Former running back to become former tight end   ( independent.co.uk) divider line
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22873 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Dec 2008 at 1:31 PM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»


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Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2008-12-05 01:49:12 PM  
Man, this takes me back.

They got Al Capone on tax evasion.

Still, can anyone think of a case more colossally mishandled than the murder trial?
 
2008-12-05 01:49:29 PM  
i37.tinypic.com
 
2008-12-05 01:49:33 PM  
...I didn't know I was doing anything illegal.

Really OJ? Really?


douchebag!
 
2008-12-05 01:49:44 PM  

Ass Machine Jones: But really though, he actually got 14 years for murder, 1 for kidnapping and armed robbery


Like I said - close enough for government work.
 
2008-12-05 01:50:03 PM  
Awesome news.

+1 for Subby.
 
2008-12-05 01:50:05 PM  
Guilty Simpson's career gets a spike in interest.
 
2008-12-05 01:50:06 PM  
Merry Christmas, Nordberg!
 
2008-12-05 01:50:15 PM  
Obama will pardon him in 8 years.
 
2008-12-05 01:50:30 PM  

Weaver95: The only people we let commit fraud and theft are corporate CEOs.



www.nasa.gov
Don't worry! Even if ya get caught, good 'ol Bushie has your back. Who can I pardon today?
 
2008-12-05 01:50:53 PM  
Now if only I could find my POGs and slammers. I had one with O.J. on it.

It was cleverly labeled "O.J. in the Slammer"

/POGs
//was it really that long ago? Fark.
 
2008-12-05 01:51:02 PM  
Orange Jumpsuit Simpson. It has a nice ring to it.
 
2008-12-05 01:51:07 PM  
Also, how was it recorded during the crime? Did someone have a tape recorder?
 
2008-12-05 01:51:21 PM  
Anyone wonder what happened to Kato Kaelin? (SP?)
 
2008-12-05 01:51:22 PM  
Will he see the rain in prison?
 
2008-12-05 01:52:42 PM  
shoulda fried, that smug bastard.
 
2008-12-05 01:53:39 PM  

Archie Goodwin: Orange Jumpsuit Simpson. It has a nice ring to it.



That was a great joke back in '94, and now it's for real.

THE JUICE IS NOT LOOSE!
 
2008-12-05 01:54:31 PM  
I'm pretty sure he will be the caboose of the sodomy train.
 
2008-12-05 01:54:36 PM  
Better late than never I suppose.
 
2008-12-05 01:54:47 PM  
Whatever happens in OJ dribbles slowly from OJ in a pearlescent stream towards the torn and stained prison bunk covering.
 
2008-12-05 01:54:53 PM  
All white jury convicts black man.

It'll get overturned.
 
2008-12-05 01:55:02 PM  

Ready_Cents: A jury of his peers found him not guilty of the murders. Putting him away for this minor offense now is really a travesty of justice and just shows how racist people in this country still are. He should get probation at most. Nobody was hurt. I hope Obama pardons him



Nevada law carries a mandatory 6 year sentence for this type of thing. He got let off easy as there was a potential for a life sentence
 
2008-12-05 01:55:05 PM  
Somehow I doubt he'd be a target for teh buttsecks in prison, since he did kill two people and seems like a stone cold motherfarker in general.

/if he was some wimpy nebbish on the other hand...
 
2008-12-05 01:55:12 PM  
Won't get juiced again, YEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

/he better watch out for the cornhole
 
2008-12-05 01:55:12 PM  
haha!

OJ got squeezed!

/it's original to me, dammit!
 
2008-12-05 01:55:13 PM  
At least he can spend his time looking for the "real killer" in prison, instead of on the golf course.
 
2008-12-05 01:55:15 PM  
Hah!
 
2008-12-05 01:55:15 PM  

GavinTheAlmighty: Also, how was it recorded during the crime? Did someone have a tape recorder?


tape recorders and video cameras are everywhere these days. the only time they don't end up in evidence is if someone has a VERY good lawyer on their side.
 
2008-12-05 01:56:04 PM  

Pair-o-Dice: CBR ME ASAP:
Subby, if you are going to use the joke at least use it appropriately.

The joke is....He entered jail as a tight-end, but left as a wide receiver.

Will he be the pitcher or the catcher?


He won't even be in general population. But just for shiats and giggles I'd say catcher. The interesting question though, is what hole, 1 or 5???
 
2008-12-05 01:56:16 PM  
Hey, O.J.:

i78.photobucket.com

Instant Delayed karma got you!
 
2008-12-05 01:56:36 PM  
Good bye and good riddance, you psychopathic egomaniac jackass.
 
2008-12-05 01:56:40 PM  
This is bad news... for O.J.
 
2008-12-05 01:56:56 PM  

The_Sponge: Archie Goodwin: Orange Jumpsuit Simpson. It has a nice ring to it.


That was a great joke back in '94, and now it's for real.

THE JUICE IS NOT LOOSE!


Contradicting a point I just made for the easy punchline: The Juice will soon be loose!
 
2008-12-05 01:57:04 PM  
"It was further noted that Mr. Simpson was contrite, and just wanted everyone to know that, in his words:

i466.photobucket.com
 
2008-12-05 01:57:30 PM  
Who knew sentencing could be so amusing?

"I told you I didn't know, Mr. Simpson, if you were arrogant or ignorant, or both. During the course of the trial, I got my answer: both."

And OJ's defense attorney--"Judge, you're mahhhvelous, no really, I mean it...it has been a pleasure and a real thrill being in your courtroom, you're just...puppies and rainbows, you fabulous judge you."
 
2008-12-05 01:57:59 PM  

Funk Brothers: I am hoping for a pardon either by Bush or Obama.


Good for you. I'm hoping you and your spouse get your throats cut.
 
2008-12-05 01:58:04 PM  

The English Major: Last time an OJ verdict was announced, I was in my high school chemistry class.
Now, I'm sitting at work filing termination paperwork.

How times have changed.


While Farking? You may end up filing your own...
 
2008-12-05 01:58:26 PM  
Ready_Cents: A jury of his peers found him not guilty of the murders. Putting him away for this minor offense now is really a travesty of justice and just shows how racist people in this country still are. He should get probation at most. Nobody was hurt. I hope Obama pardons him

Armed Robbery is not a misdemeanor. Moreover, it is clear OJ knew what he was doing. BTW: if you can't do the time, don't do the crime.
 
2008-12-05 01:58:41 PM  
Hey guys? I don't really want to see dudes making out, but whatever. However, I can guarantee that my boss doesn't.
 
2008-12-05 01:59:03 PM  
I got sucked into watching an hour of this just like a got sucked into watching the slow speed chase.

The prick deserved every year of his sentence and more.
 
2008-12-05 01:59:41 PM  

eggrolls: Good bye and good riddance, you psychopathic egomaniac jackass.


THIS!
 
2008-12-05 01:59:47 PM  
LET'S SEE THAT AGAIN ON INSTANT REPLAY!
 
2008-12-05 01:59:52 PM  

CaesarSneezy: I can guarantee that my boss doesn't.


That you KNOW of!
 
2008-12-05 02:00:32 PM  
Anybody know which prison he will be staying at?
 
2008-12-05 02:00:57 PM  
So today is the day when the news world explodes. Get ready to see this and only this for the next 3 weeks.

But the worse thing about this?

Now we definitely won't be seeing 'Naked Gun 4.'
 
2008-12-05 02:01:04 PM  

RoxtarRyan: Weaver95: The only people we let commit fraud and theft are corporate CEOs.

Don't worry! Even if ya get caught, good 'ol Bushie has your back. Who can I pardon today?


Idiot, Bush has given out many fewer pardons than most, including Clinton.
 
2008-12-05 02:01:13 PM  

Marla Singer's Laundry: Whatever happens in OJ dribbles slowly from OJ in a pearlescent stream towards the torn and stained prison bunk covering.


You watch way, way too much porn.

/+1
 
2008-12-05 02:02:11 PM  
routingbyrumor.files.wordpress.com
this guy has OJ beat in the "shamefully try your hardest to suck in your face" category
 
2008-12-05 02:02:26 PM  

CaesarSneezy: Hey guys? I don't really want to see dudes making out, but whatever. However, I can guarantee that my boss doesn't.


Just assure him that you're not one of the guys in the picture, so he doesn't have to be jealous ;)
 
2008-12-05 02:02:36 PM  
So, fellow whities, where do the celebratory riots start?
 
2008-12-05 02:02:43 PM  
Hey OJAY!
i38.photobucket.com
 
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