If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)   Spam emails up the ante: "I was paid to eliminate you and I have to do it within 10 days. ... I might just spare your life, $8,000 is all you need to spend"   (tampabay.com) divider line 134
    More: Scary  
•       •       •

13959 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2008 at 2:22 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



134 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2008-12-04 11:09:00 AM
i got one of those a couple months ago... complete bullshiat yes, but still unnerving. i reported it both to local authorities and the fbi. though the one i got was preceded by one from the same address wanting to sell me shoulder mounted anti-aircraft missiles, gay sex slaves and cocaine. good times.
 
2008-12-04 11:11:26 AM
oh here we go, i still have it:

Welcome to the site timothystuff dot com, it's us again, now we extended our offerings,
here is a list:

1. Heroin, in liquid and crystal form.
2. Rocket fuel and Tomohawk rockets (serious enquiries only).
3. Other rockets (Air-to-Air), orders in batches of 10.
4. New shipment of cocaine has arrived, buy 9 grams and get 10th for free.
5. We also offer gay-slaves for sale, we offer only such service on the NET,
you can choose the one you like, then get straight to business.
6. Fake currencies, such as Euros and US dollars, prices would match competition.

Everyone is welcome, be it in States or any other place worldwide.

ATTENTION. Clearance offer. Buy 30 grams of heroin, get 5 free.
Prepay your batch of rockets (air-to-air) and recieve a portable rocket-lacuncher
for free.

Transfer money to our account and call phone number below:
Bank name: Five Star Bank
Account: 751244384
ACH Routing: 022304030
 
2008-12-04 11:12:34 AM
and then it was followed by:

I am very sorry for you, is a pity that this is how your life is
going to end as soon as you don't comply. As you can see there is no need
of introducing myself to you because I don't have any business with you,
my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL you and I have to do it
as I have already been paid for that.

But I give you a chance. Call my neighbor 315-***-***** and say password "there is time to save my skin" and if that would sound convincing, I will forget about you.
Tell him this password for Timothy Sinclair (be sure it is not my real name).

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE
BECAUSE I WILL KNOW.
 
2008-12-04 11:17:58 AM
cranberryzero: I dunno. I can get rockets, gay sex slaves, coke, and save my life? Sounds like a pretty good deal. Much better than what that Nigerian prince was offering me.
 
2008-12-04 11:23:51 AM
cranberryzero: one from the same address wanting to sell me shoulder mounted anti-aircraft missiles, gay sex slaves and cocaine. good times.

Seriously, how did you not take that? I mean I understand the part about the gay sex though. Not that there's anything wrong with it.
 
2008-12-04 11:24:28 AM
Reply: I just sent my last $8K to a barrister to handle my UK lottery winnings. I will have €22 million in a week's time. Can you wait until then? I will double your payment.
 
2008-12-04 11:59:08 AM
cranberryzero: and then it was followed by:

I am very sorry for you, is a pity that this is how your life is
going to end as soon as you don't comply. As you can see there is no need
of introducing myself to you because I don't have any business with you,
my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL you and I have to do it
as I have already been paid for that.

But I give you a chance. Call my neighbor 315-***-***** and say password "there is time to save my skin" and if that would sound convincing, I will forget about you.
Tell him this password for Timothy Sinclair (be sure it is not my real name).

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE
BECAUSE I WILL KNOW.


You should've replied back with some e-mail about how somebody paid you more than $8,000 to kill them to see if you could start an incoherent flamewar.
 
2008-12-04 12:11:16 PM
Wasn't this a movie with Johnny Depp?
 
2008-12-04 12:14:41 PM
Ya, I got one of those.

Here's hoping if someone DOES come to kill me, they at least write me a better death threat.
 
2008-12-04 12:37:43 PM
Now that is enterprising!
 
2008-12-04 01:17:11 PM
It's a good thing my will states that in the event of assassination, half my estate goes to painful retaliation against the murderer.

/the other half will be used against spammers.
 
2008-12-04 01:43:21 PM
Fondle My Sweaters: cranberryzero: and then it was followed by:

I am very sorry for you, is a pity that this is how your life is
going to end as soon as you don't comply. As you can see there is no need
of introducing myself to you because I don't have any business with you,
my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL you and I have to do it
as I have already been paid for that.

But I give you a chance. Call my neighbor 315-***-***** and say password "there is time to save my skin" and if that would sound convincing, I will forget about you.
Tell him this password for Timothy Sinclair (be sure it is not my real name).

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE
BECAUSE I WILL KNOW.

You should've replied back with some e-mail about how somebody paid you more than $8,000 to kill them to see if you could start an incoherent flamewar.


That, or make up some shiat about you having Special Forces experience and tell them to bring their A-game. Tell them to send you $1000 and walk away otherwise you'll have to "engage the enemy and neutralize the threat."
 
2008-12-04 01:44:01 PM
farm1.static.flickr.com
 
2008-12-04 02:27:29 PM
www.cinemaxasia.com
 
2008-12-04 02:28:24 PM
If someone is paid less than $8000 to kill you, you have not done much with your life.
 
2008-12-04 02:29:47 PM
Reply back, and tell him that he'll have to meet you in person because you don't have a computer.

When he shows up to the meeting, hit him with a claw hammer.
 
2008-12-04 02:30:41 PM
Would be fun to respond to them with the Nigerian prince scam.
 
2008-12-04 02:30:56 PM
I'm truly impressed... second Tampa headline greenlit without the Florida Tag!
 
2008-12-04 02:31:07 PM
I have to start checking my junk mail .
 
2008-12-04 02:31:42 PM
cranberryzero: i got was preceded by one from the same address wanting to sell me shoulder mounted anti-aircraft missiles, gay sex slaves and cocaine. good times.

img152.imageshack.us

'Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good time in Vegas with all that stuff.'
 
2008-12-04 02:31:54 PM
Send me $100 within 10 days or I will shrink your penis.
 
2008-12-04 02:32:07 PM
Supercheeks BRILLIANT!
 
2008-12-04 02:32:09 PM
PirateKing: Reply back, and tell him that he'll have to meet you in person because you don't have a computer.

When he shows up to the meeting, hit him with a claw hammer.


Keyboard. You owe me one.
 
2008-12-04 02:33:23 PM
cranberryzero: and then it was followed by:

I am very sorry for you, is a pity that this is how your life is
going to end as soon as you don't comply. As you can see there is no need
of introducing myself to you because I don't have any business with you,
my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL you and I have to do it
as I have already been paid for that.

But I give you a chance. Call my neighbor 315-***-***** and say password "there is time to save my skin" and if that would sound convincing, I will forget about you.
Tell him this password for Timothy Sinclair (be sure it is not my real name).

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE
BECAUSE I WILL KNOW.


Hunters' Club extortion instead of assassination? Somebody's going to be pissed.
 
2008-12-04 02:33:30 PM
farm1.static.flickr.com

FTFA: From there, the message warns of certain death - ordered by an unnamed "friend"

It'd be more convincing if it was "spouse". B-tch set me up!

/I can still help that guy get that money out of Uganda though, right? Am I right?
 
2008-12-04 02:33:33 PM
Only $8000? You're not competent enough to succeed. Bring it, mother f*cker.
 
2008-12-04 02:34:00 PM
Lt. Cheese Weasel: cranberryzero: i got was preceded by one from the same address wanting to sell me shoulder mounted anti-aircraft missiles, gay sex slaves and cocaine. good times.



'Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good time in Vegas with all that stuff.'


Came here for this!
Leaving satisfied
 
2008-12-04 02:34:09 PM
wrightb71: I have to start checking my junk mail .

That is what I was thinking. Usually it is all penis enlargement and debt reduction crap. Nothing fun like death threats
 
2008-12-04 02:35:11 PM
From TFA

"The sheriff has done a good job in trying to assess the situation," he said. "It's just one of those new fishing scams to try to bilk people out of money."

That's some good reporting there, Lou....
 
2008-12-04 02:35:31 PM
And if the Hitman knows that you went to the cops? It is the cops, coming to kill your cocaine infested ass...

But reply to them to wait until you are done with your Gay sex slave first and cleaned up. Okay..
 
2008-12-04 02:35:31 PM
My reply:

I have taken your offer into consideration, and i have decided to decline at this time. I do apologize in advance for the tragedy to come. My associates in the Skull and Bones Society have already tracked your IP address, and are currently utilizing our advanced geneology reources to ensure that all family members directly related to you by blood will have their lives terminated on or before 12:00 AM GMT, Dec. 17th, 2008.

At this time, I am not authorized to offer you the opportunity of a preventative payoff, because it has come to our attention that other members of our society have received similar messages from you and your associates. You will be pleased to know, however, that your own life shall be spared, so that there is someone in your family left to arrange the various funeral arrangements. I trust you will be using some of the proceeds of your current enterprise to pay to make sure that your family members are honored in the proper fashion, although we can make no guarantee that all of the corpses will be able to be found.

Thank you, and have a nice day.
 
2008-12-04 02:36:04 PM
opcug.ca
 
2008-12-04 02:36:14 PM
You could always email him a drawing of a spider and say it's worth $8000.
 
2008-12-04 02:36:14 PM
If the Nigerian prince calls again, tell him I will give him 20,000 USD if he can transfer 2,000 USD to my account first, as an act of good faith on his part.
 
2008-12-04 02:36:54 PM
I'd love to get one of these and reply back, "Go ahead, my husband and kids need my life insurace money."
 
2008-12-04 02:37:26 PM
mikaloyd: Send me $100 within 10 days or I will shrink your penis.

DARRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNN YOU... YOU PROMISED ME 10 DAYS before it would happen...
 
2008-12-04 02:37:56 PM
I'd just tell him to READ THE farkING BUSINESS SECTION!!! no one has 8k to blow on a hit.

/just kidding, we can put it on layaway and pay with a credit card that withdraws directly from out 401ks.
 
2008-12-04 02:39:00 PM
I have received a smiliar email almost 2 years. I bite and sent threatening responses they basically stopped responding after 1 or 2 emails. Figured if someone really wanted to off me they would just do it.
 
2008-12-04 02:40:36 PM
* DELETE *
 
2008-12-04 02:41:03 PM
Boritom: My reply:

I have taken your offer into consideration, and i have decided to decline at this time. I do apologize in advance for the tragedy to come. My associates in the Skull and Bones Society have already tracked your IP address, and are currently utilizing our advanced geneology reources to ensure that all family members directly related to you by blood will have their lives terminated on or before 12:00 AM GMT, Dec. 17th, 2008.

At this time, I am not authorized to offer you the opportunity of a preventative payoff, because it has come to our attention that other members of our society have received similar messages from you and your associates. You will be pleased to know, however, that your own life shall be spared, so that there is someone in your family left to arrange the various funeral arrangements. I trust you will be using some of the proceeds of your current enterprise to pay to make sure that your family members are honored in the proper fashion, although we can make no guarantee that all of the corpses will be able to be found.

Thank you, and have a nice day.


SMASHING!!!!! Freaking brilliant
 
2008-12-04 02:41:41 PM
It must just be me. On the odd occassion I get an email from something or someone like "ja­ckbrow­n1[nospam-﹫-backwards]m­u­rt­nec­*cz" I don't even look at the subject line, I just hit delete.
 
2008-12-04 02:42:41 PM
Heroic Poser: Here's hoping if someone DOES come to kill me, they at least write me a better death threat.

Oh, very well:

"You don't know me, Heroic Poser, but our paths crossed last year in Vienna. At that time, i swore sweet revenge, but to myself only. Now that my master plan is in place, i can at last reveal it to you.

At some point today, a man dressed as a large hamster will approach you on the street. He will be carrying a WWII-era Bren gun. You will think he is the one assigned to dispatch you, but ... no. He is simply there to remind you of your immanent demise. The plan, is in fact, far more fiendish and involves morris dancers, a reindeer, several people disguised as Starbucks baristas, a jar of Hellman's mayonaise and the rapper and actor, Will Smith.

To tell you more would be to say too much. Suffice to say that you will rue that day in Vienna, Heroic Poser. You will RUE IT."
 
2008-12-04 02:42:49 PM
I'm a hitman/spammer so I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

Honestly I always wanted to slip Hitman onto my resume.
 
2008-12-04 02:42:59 PM
The FA said they were all realtors who got this email. I would consider it credible.

Realtors are scum.
 
2008-12-04 02:43:11 PM
Just checked my junk mail. 6 emails from Nigeria and 1 from Spain. Damn I'm gonna be rich! That $8k to save my butt will be a drop in the hat.

Big money! Big money! STOP!!!
 
2008-12-04 02:43:16 PM
So does that mean you guys aren't going to send me the money?

Um.

I mean, yeah, that sucks.
 
2008-12-04 02:43:42 PM
tortilla burger: You could always email him a drawing of a spider and say it's worth $8000.

No, you can't email them. They just use dummy addresses, and require you to contact them via their preferred method (like a phone call that you have to pay a hell of a lot for because it's to some scam-infested Caribbean island.)
 
2008-12-04 02:43:51 PM
Farkwaddle: Just checked my junk mail. 6 emails from Nigeria and 1 from Spain. Damn I'm gonna be rich! That $8k to save my butt will be a drop in the hat.

Big money! Big money! STOP!!!


The Whammy is your friend.
 
2008-12-04 02:44:30 PM
Hmmm, take e-mail address from scammer and use it to register for 100's of spam websites. He'll have to laugh when opens his inbox and finds 25 gay porn emails, 32 enlarge your penis ads, and 13 videos of billy mays screaming at you until you buy his product.
 
2008-12-04 02:44:56 PM
Mirrorz: I'm a hitman/spammer so I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

Honestly I always wanted to slip Hitman onto my resume.


You have given me an idea......I am going to update my resume and take it to GES (Graduate Employment Services) here on campus. They help you edit and write resumes. Wonder if anyone would notice.
 
Displayed 50 of 134 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report