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(UPI)   Six people arrested for smuggling ivory, now facing up to 99.44 years in prison   (upi.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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3822 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Dec 2008 at 4:04 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



88 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2008-12-03 03:15:07 PM  
Pure genius.
 
2008-12-03 03:17:07 PM  
God that's beautiful!
 
2008-12-03 03:17:12 PM  
*golf clap*
 
2008-12-03 03:23:45 PM  
Well played.
 
2008-12-03 03:24:18 PM  
It's a good headline, but you guys are really getting into a lather about it...
 
2008-12-03 03:36:32 PM  
Was this purely your idea or did you float it by someone else subby?
 
2008-12-03 03:42:20 PM  
Damn it, I was hoping I could post something witty before all the good puns were taken...I sudspose I'll come up with something else later.
 
2008-12-03 03:43:34 PM  
That headline is pure genius. Well...mostly.
 
2008-12-03 03:46:48 PM  
Just don't drop it in the slammer...
 
2008-12-03 03:52:21 PM  
They were tripped up by a little white lye. They should just come clean about it.
 
2008-12-03 03:54:12 PM  
Best headline Bar none.
 
2008-12-03 04:07:37 PM  
p-userpic.livejournal.com
 
2008-12-03 04:07:56 PM  
A+++++ headline.

Would read again.
 
2008-12-03 04:08:20 PM  
A headline so pure, it floats!
 
2008-12-03 04:09:43 PM  
hopefully they will clean up their act.
 
2008-12-03 04:10:08 PM  
what was the other .06% made of??? Just wondering...
 
2008-12-03 04:10:10 PM  
Excellent headline.
Also, the smugglers should be tortured and shot.
 
2008-12-03 04:10:14 PM  
Somebody care to explain?
 
2008-12-03 04:10:58 PM  
oops meant other .56 %...
 
2008-12-03 04:11:00 PM  
Submitter is wise and gets a pat on the back.
 
2008-12-03 04:11:32 PM  

Missicat: what was the other .06% made of??? Just wondering...


Jews.
 
2008-12-03 04:11:47 PM  

Missicat: what was the other .06% 0.56 made of??? Just wondering...


FTFY
 
2008-12-03 04:12:16 PM  

Tiiba: Somebody care to explain?


How young are you?
 
2008-12-03 04:12:51 PM  
Tiiba, you're kidding?
 
2008-12-03 04:13:10 PM  
farm4.static.flickr.comView Full Size
 
2008-12-03 04:13:33 PM  

Missicat: oops meant other .56 %...


Deadly Radon
 
2008-12-03 04:13:39 PM  

Tiiba: Somebody care to explain?


You're flakier than a box of Ivory Snow.

OK ok ok, I'll explain.
See smuggling Ivory is illegal.
SO they are in trouble for doing it.
 
2008-12-03 04:13:43 PM  

vudukungfu: Tiiba: Somebody care to explain?

How young are you?


The polite answer is "the headline joke refers to Ivory soap, which was advertised as "99.44% pure".
 
2008-12-03 04:13:55 PM  

Cold_Sassy: Tiiba, you're kidding?


How about you explain instead of being a jerk? I'm guessing it's one of those things us younger folk don't get.
 
2008-12-03 04:14:02 PM  
Time for the ebony stick.
 
2008-12-03 04:14:57 PM  
Pure win, subby. Pure win.
 
2008-12-03 04:15:21 PM  
oddly enough the soap has a determined pH value of 9.5. coincidence?
 
2008-12-03 04:15:38 PM  

Missicat: what was the other .56% made of???


Margin of error. I think it's carcinogenic.
 
2008-12-03 04:16:33 PM  

No Such Agency:

The polite answer is "the headline joke refers to Ivory soap, which was advertised as "99.44% pure".


What's Polite? If you google 99.44 the first thing that pops up is Ivory soap. It's like if your parents kept hearing "fourtwenty" and figured out how to Look it up.
That's the reason we are here.
Link (new window)
 
2008-12-03 04:16:39 PM  

vudukungfu: OK ok ok, I'll explain.
See smuggling Ivory is illegal.
SO they are in trouble for doing it.


I lol'ed

/nice headline subby, +1
 
2008-12-03 04:17:21 PM  
This is a headline that I could really sink my teeth into.
 
2008-12-03 04:18:49 PM  
They should really keep on hoping to be acquitted. After all, hope floats.

//you guys won't get it. Historical joke and all.
 
2008-12-03 04:18:54 PM  

JanusofZeal: Cold_Sassy: Tiiba, you're kidding?

How about you explain instead of being a jerk? I'm guessing it's one of those things us younger folk don't get.


here (new window)
/now... get off my lawn!
 
2008-12-03 04:19:04 PM  

Missicat: what was the other .06% made of??? Just wondering...


Ebony....
 
2008-12-03 04:19:52 PM  
I don't watch TV, so most TV advertisement-related jokes fly over my head.

DVDs from Nexflix is how I roll. Sorry for being so stuck in the future.
 
2008-12-03 04:19:56 PM  
JanusofZeal: How about you explain instead of being a jerk?

Or, you could, I dunno, use that fancy "Google" you kids always talk about. It's not like the answer isn't explained in the very first link that pops up.
 
2008-12-03 04:20:08 PM  

Ms MacGyver: Missicat: what was the other .06% made of??? Just wondering...

Ebony....


I'm a poacher, not a hunter.
 
2008-12-03 04:20:11 PM  

Missicat: oops meant other .56 %...


Ebony....

/since I replied to the wrong one....
 
2008-12-03 04:20:36 PM  
vudukungfu: How young are you?

21 and I didn't get it.
 
2008-12-03 04:21:05 PM  
This is great news. We must safeguard these animals. Now its an elephant in danger, but what's next? A dove?? The scum that did this should be thrown into lava. I know if I had prior knowledge of this crime, I'd dial the cops.

/no pun intended
 
2008-12-03 04:21:31 PM  

Tiiba: I don't watch TV, so most TV advertisement-related jokes fly over my head.

DVDs from Nexflix is how I roll. Sorry for being so stuck in the future.


ahem...
Welcome to... THE FUTURE! (new window)
 
2008-12-03 04:23:14 PM  

Missicat: what was the other .06% made of??? Just wondering...


I never did get a good answer to that one. Why isn't Ivory 100% pure? Inquiring minds...
 
2008-12-03 04:24:09 PM  
Eh. This headline was just ok
 
2008-12-03 04:25:01 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: JanusofZeal: How about you explain instead of being a jerk?

Or, you could, I dunno, use that fancy "Google" you kids always talk about. It's not like the answer isn't explained in the very first link that pops up.


Or people could not be pricks. I know that's asking a lot.

Guess what, when we don't know the joke, we don't know what to google. Maybe I should've tried "six people" or "smuggling ivory"? There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with asking in the comments, and there is no reason for people to just be pricks about it. You want to be a prick? I'm actually okay with that, but at least ANSWER THE QUESTION too.
 
2008-12-03 04:25:52 PM  
Should have been 88 years in jail....
 
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