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(Minneapolis Star Tribune)   He...Could..Go...All...The...Way   (startribune.com ) divider line
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25288 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Nov 2008 at 7:39 PM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



115 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2008-11-25 05:38:43 PM  
FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!
 
2008-11-25 05:51:40 PM  
the8re: FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!


huh.
 
2008-11-25 05:52:45 PM  
the8re: FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!


Yeah. Wow.

Both were intoxicated, said Deputy Police Chief Chuck Miner.

Ya Reckon?
 
2008-11-25 07:10:39 PM  
bomp bomp nininina bomp bomp nininina bomp bomp nininina
 
2008-11-25 07:29:00 PM  
Void of Rose Dale.
 
2008-11-25 07:46:06 PM  
A security guard came upon the scene

I hope he apologised and wiped it off.
 
2008-11-25 07:46:15 PM  
FTA: Police say that a man and woman were "having relations" in one of the bathroom stalls

Does the smell of stale urine really turn that many people on?
 
2008-11-25 07:46:24 PM  
Yeah, I know my wife won't be attending sports games by herself any time soon.
 
2008-11-25 07:46:37 PM  
ftfa: The man, 26 and from Linden, Iowa, and the woman 38 and from Carroll, Iowa, were cited for misdemeanor indecent conduct. He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

OH SNAP!!!!

/ someone's gonna get a hurt real bad!
 
2008-11-25 07:46:38 PM  
I misread that as "THE crowd cheered them on." I was wondering how they could see that, unless they hooked a camera in the stall to the scoreboard.
 
2008-11-25 07:46:44 PM  
FTA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

LOL, some one has some 'splaining to do.
 
2008-11-25 07:47:01 PM  

the8re: FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!


Yeah, just thinking about it makes my blood run cold.
 
2008-11-25 07:48:25 PM  

Veritas: A security guard came upon the scene

I hope he apologised and wiped it off.


Was thinking the same thing. Pretty unprofessional to get that excited. He really should have just done his job and asked them to stop.
 
2008-11-25 07:49:11 PM  
FTFA:
...in the handicapped stall...

tbn3.google.com

APPROVES.
 
2008-11-25 07:49:15 PM  
Best story ever...
 
2008-11-25 07:49:28 PM  
assets.espn.go.com

ecoscraps.com

www.funny-potato.com

iz.carnegiemnh.org

I wanted to see pictures, then I saw the byline was from Minnesoter.

Wowza!!!
 
2008-11-25 07:50:26 PM  

Wikious: I misread that as "THE crowd cheered them on." I was wondering how they could see that, unless they hooked a camera in the stall to the scoreboard.


Ever been to a Nine Inch Nails concert?
 
2008-11-25 07:50:29 PM  
There is so much Win in this article, I'm moved to a tear. Not a tear of sadness; the sort that slowly falls down your cheek as you watch someone achieve greatness. Like watching the Obama acceptance speech, but with tits, ass, cheating, exhibitionism, and booze.

It's just firing on all cylinders.
 
2008-11-25 07:51:04 PM  
Police were summoned, and they separated the two.

With what, a crowbar?
 
2008-11-25 07:51:22 PM  
A security guard came upon the scene

Man...Cops never gotta pay for nothin.
 
2008-11-25 07:51:47 PM  
It could've been worse. They could've released her to his girlfriend and him to her husband.
 
2008-11-25 07:52:16 PM  
He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.


Wow..that must have been pleasant. "Jeez honey...you were gone to get beer a long time!!"
 
2008-11-25 07:52:54 PM  
no way would that whore get a ride back to Iowa if she was my wife.
 
2008-11-25 07:53:08 PM  
ftfa
Police were summoned, and they separated the two.


nothing like a cop pulling an intoxicated man's penis out of an intoxicated woman's vagina.

/ :-P
// i keed i keed.
 
2008-11-25 07:53:48 PM  

the8re: FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!


There is literally no way the writer could have made that part more confusing without lapsing into tongues.
 
2008-11-25 07:54:32 PM  

Veritas: A security guard came upon the scene

I hope he apologised and wiped it off.


WIN.
 
2008-11-25 07:55:42 PM  
Not quite win, not exactly fail.

This is EPIC. Epic something.

EPIC SOMETHING!
 
2008-11-25 07:55:51 PM  
It probably sounded something like this. (new window)
 
2008-11-25 07:55:58 PM  
When his wife told him she was going for a beer and a weiner she wasn't kidding.
 
2008-11-25 07:56:10 PM  
Bit'O'Gristle Quote 2008-11-25 07:52:16 PM
He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.


Wow..that must have been pleasant. "Jeez honey...you were gone to get beer a long time!!"



Jail would have been the better option...
 
2008-11-25 07:56:22 PM  
Both were intoxicated, said Deputy Police Chief Chuck Miner.

yessssss
 
2008-11-25 07:56:53 PM  

mdin617: It could've been worse. They could've released her to his girlfriend and him to her husband.


I was thinking the same thing.
 
2008-11-25 07:57:14 PM  

deevo: Wikious: I misread that as "THE crowd cheered them on." I was wondering how they could see that, unless they hooked a camera in the stall to the scoreboard.

Ever been to a Nine Inch Nails concert?


Oh, stop reminding me the show is tonight and even if i could go, i couldn't afford a ticket.
 
2008-11-25 07:57:14 PM  
So awesome. My swingers club is gonna love this story!
 
2008-11-25 07:57:18 PM  
Did they start a wave?

FTFA: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.

Buried the lead (Ha!) on that one.

Approves:

images.fanpop.com

/giggity
\\backwards slashies giggity
 
2008-11-25 07:57:39 PM  

honk if you demand satisfaction: no way would that whore get a ride back to Iowa if she was my wife.


she already got a ride for the day
 
2008-11-25 07:58:14 PM  
Oh man, I saw the headline and thought Chris Berman had died or something.
 
2008-11-25 07:58:20 PM  
He fixes the cable?
 
2008-11-25 08:02:39 PM  

Stay Cool Babylon: There is so much Win in this article, I'm moved to a tear. Not a tear of sadness; the sort that slowly falls down your cheek as you watch someone achieve greatness. Like watching the Obama acceptance speech, but with tits, ass, cheating, exhibitionism, and booze.

It's just firing on all cylinders.


poetry.
 
2008-11-25 08:04:07 PM  
Damn, Why even get married?
I feel so bad for that chicks husband
and that dudes girlfriend to a lesser extent.

It's like what even the farking point of getting married? She just took a flying shiat on that dudes life man. All it takes is one bad decision and your "wife" or "husband" can totally ruin your farking life or at least make however many years you've spent with them a total farking waste.

I'm unofficially engaged and I just really don't know if I can in my rational mind honestly say that getting married is a smart thing.

Oh my.
 
2008-11-25 08:04:16 PM  
i215.photobucket.com
 
2008-11-25 08:05:16 PM  
If this had been two men in the stall, they would have been arrested, jailed, tried and required to register as sex offenders for the rest of their lives.
 
2008-11-25 08:05:59 PM  
I'm sure I'll get plenty of scorn for this, but I've never understood farking in a public restroom. I don't even want to take a piss or dump in one, I sure don't wanna fark there. Seriously. Ew.
 
2008-11-25 08:07:06 PM  

montex: If this had been two men in the stall, they would have been arrested, jailed, tried and required to register as sex offenders for the rest of their lives.


or at the very least they would be voted out of the senate...
 
2008-11-25 08:07:23 PM  
The restrooms at the dome are some of the most disgusting places on earth.

Take your average stadium restroom and multiply by a billion.
 
2008-11-25 08:07:59 PM  

Veritas: A security guard came upon the scene

I hope he apologised and wiped it off.


I laughed so hard I think a little pee came out.
 
2008-11-25 08:09:28 PM  
Shrapnel [TotalFark]

i215.photobucket.com

That movie was so bad it was good
 
2008-11-25 08:10:28 PM  
Go Cougars!!!!
 
2008-11-25 08:10:56 PM  
the8re: HOLY FARKING CRAP!!! I re-read that 3 times.

That was a long drive home for both of them, I'm sure!


Hey, When I delivered the paper in my youth, One of the carriers was a guy who lived with his wife, ex wife, and girlfriend, all in the same house. And he was the anti Brad Pitt. And they all were aware of the status of the others.
 
2008-11-25 08:11:07 PM  

somewhere up above: He was released to his girlfriend and she to her husband, police said.


Not the release he was hoping for, I'm sure.

So is it actually Herpe The Hawk?
 
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