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(Stinky)   Thinking only of others, man arrested after trying to steal $22 worth of deodorant   (dailymail.com) divider line 23
    More: Amusing  
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1312 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Nov 2008 at 4:50 PM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



23 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2008-11-18 02:22:29 PM
If it's that bad, you should probably see your doctor.
 
2008-11-18 02:35:55 PM
It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.
It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.
 
2008-11-18 03:12:49 PM
It wasn't just deodorant he was stealing, it was deodorant body spray. No mercy! Sentence this guy to life in front of a firing squad!!
 
2008-11-18 04:55:25 PM
His pleasant odour will surely attract attention in prison. Sleep with one eye open, buddy!
 
2008-11-18 04:56:39 PM
BKITU: It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.
It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.


Came here for the reference. Now leaving before an argument starts over the source.
 
2008-11-18 05:00:34 PM
That stinks ...

/nothin'
 
2008-11-18 05:04:16 PM
I like this article. It's sorta like a Mad Lib.

I went to the store to steal $22 worth of BODY SPRAY .
But I got caught, so I threatened people with my BOX CUTTERS .
That didn't work so I stabbed him with a PEN .
 
2008-11-18 05:04:33 PM
FTFA: When a store loss prevention officer and a store manager confronted the man, he allegedly pulled out a box cutter and waved it at them, the complaint said.

I call shenanigans! Everybody knows that box cutters are only effective in airplane hijackings!


FTFA: The man tried to flee, but the officer and manager stopped him, the complaint said. A struggled ensued and the manager was stuck in the arm with a pen, according to the complaint.

Day-um! Box cutters! Pens! There was some serious hardware involved in this caper!
 
2008-11-18 05:07:46 PM
He's got teen spirit....
 
2008-11-18 05:08:14 PM
mephisto6: I like this article. It's sorta like a Mad Lib.

I went to the store to steal $22 worth of BODY SPRAY .
But I got caught, so I threatened people with my BOX CUTTERS .
That didn't work so I stabbed him with a PEN .


Once I get to prison I will receive an Unsolicited _________ In the _____.
 
2008-11-18 05:08:40 PM
When I worked at Peoples Drug (now CVS) I turned the corner in the HABA aisle and there's a guy standing in the middle of the the aisle with a lawn-sized black garbage bag shoveling entire rows of toothpaste into it by sweeping his arm across the shelves. He looks up, sees me, and sprints in the other direction...directly into the assistant manager, a crazy jamaican guy named Talbert. We drug his ass in the back and roughed him a little bit. I wasn't a drug store crusader, but it was a damned insult to me for him to think he was going to walk past me witha garbage bag full of toothpaste. In my mind, he must have thought I was a biatch. The mall security came and got him and whipped his ass some more before the police came. They claim he tried to fight one of them at their little office, but I remember they used to think they were actual cops on the beat, so it wouldn't suprise me if they thought it was intheir powers to do it. One of them got fired. The man tried to come back about three months later and Talbert chased him through the mall parking lot with a switchblade.


/Work used to be so much fun
 
2008-11-18 05:09:17 PM
He should've used...
i471.photobucket.com
 
2008-11-18 05:17:20 PM
vook.files.wordpress.com
 
2008-11-18 05:19:41 PM
Did anyone stop to think that his family might be hosting a foreign exchange student from France and this was sorely needed item?
 
2008-11-18 05:19:48 PM
Subby, there is NOTHING amusing about B.O.

Although, you should've used the DUMBASS tag, seeing as the guy should've bummed soap. Motel 6 even has little bitty soaps he could've had!

But if the guy stole body spray deodorant, like Axe, then he does deserve to go down. I'd rather have funky over that shiat any day.

/Hubby smells SEXAY when he stinks. It's rare because he's on the computer and he hardly ever does hard labor outside. But when he does...PHEROMONES!!! :P
 
2008-11-18 05:39:11 PM
FTFA: a man had tried to steal $22 worth of body spray deodorant

So... one can of Axe?
 
2008-11-18 05:47:07 PM
I knew a kid back in the day who got caught stealing a home pregnancy test kit.

Ouch!
 
2008-11-18 06:47:32 PM
The only thing I thought of:

www.orlandosentinel.com

/It doesn't smell obscure, isn't it?
 
2008-11-18 06:50:22 PM
So that can't be more than, what, two cans?
 
2008-11-18 07:48:03 PM
Was he french?
 
2008-11-18 09:57:37 PM
He got caught. He was axeing for it.
 
2008-11-18 10:01:14 PM
BKITU: It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.
It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.


Came here to provide this, if I hadn't been beat'd to it.

/YEEEAYAH!
//WWWWWHUT?
 
2008-11-19 07:23:43 AM
JBLars: BKITU: It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.
It's called Speed Stick.
It's not expensive.

Came here to provide this, if I hadn't been beat'd to it.

/YEEEAYAH!
//WWWWWHUT?


My body needs water, so I drink that s*it.
 
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