Bravo, subby. +1.

She grabbed a baseball bat and after climbing a staircase to the roof, hit him with the bat to stop him escaping through the hole. Moments later police arrived.

Don't fark with a Leeds lass!

"He grabbed a stool and tried to smash his way out."

I hope the police got some of that as evidence. It would be easier to convict him with a stool sample.

Well, considering that it happened, I'd say 1:1. But that's just me.

She began to struggle with him and with "money everywhere" both fell to the floor where she was joined by Sally

What porn may look like

Robbery failure involving two women, one a single mother, in Leeds on a Saturday evening, after trying to smash his way out with a stool following which he had his head bashed by one of the women...

One in a million shot, I'd say.

/nine times out of ten

Unfreakable: All. Bets. Are. Off.

Precisely what I came in to see.

/Greedy. As. A. Pig.

The perps...

Is there some sort of connection between "betting shop" and "store cupboard"?

/not a Brit

Unfreakable: All. Bets. Are. Off.

Came here for this.

Pert: The perps...

...and this.

First we have to find the blokes that blagged the bookies.

/I'm late to the party.
//I like degs.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shiat, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

Was he escaping to Narnia?

"I ain't farking buying that!"

"That's handy, cause I ain't farking selling it. It's a fact."

I'm not looking for Vegas, and I'm not looking for legal, I'm looking for Freddie farking Four Fingers!.

Pert: The perps...

Good work.

"They tried to blag a booky's".
"Speak English to me Tony".

his last words..

"Always bet on..*WHACK*"

Wow! I'm shocked that they weren't prosecuted for unlawful imprisonment and assault and given 20 years each for violating the human rights of the robber.

Rivethead: Is there some sort of connection between "betting shop" and "store cupboard"?

/not a Brit

Not a Brit either, but I play one on TV.


Betting shop = Off-track gambling outlet (do they have a sports book there too, or is it only for horse racing?)

cupboard = closet

Why's he got a tea cozy on 'is 'ead?

Cuz 'is 'ead was cold.

Came for Snatch references, leaving satisfied.

leonel: Wow! I'm shocked that they weren't prosecuted for unlawful imprisonment and assault and given 20 years each for violating the human rights of the robber.

Well they weren't, and yet you're STILL somehow as cross as if they had been.

Well done you!

Sorry Sol, I couldn't get the bi-noc-u-lars out in time!

/Also came in for and was satisfied.

Unfreakable: All. Bets. Are. Off.

This.

leonel: Wow! I'm shocked that they weren't prosecuted for unlawful imprisonment and assault and given 20 years each for violating the human rights of the robber.

my thoughts exactly as i read this. how dare they interfere with the poor man, we can only hope that the crown brings these violent offenders to the docket..