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Fark headlines of the week for October 20 - October 26
Posted by Drew at 2008-10-27 3:25:49 PM, edited 2009-01-19 4:10:42 AM (66 comments) | Permalink
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18803 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Oct 2008 at 4:01 PM (5 years ago) | | share: more»
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We've been talking about doing this for a while, and now we've finally gotten around to it. Each week, we will be showcasing the top headlines from Fark. The top headlines are determined by a proprietary algorithm that is highly classified and soon to be patented. Actually, it's just an amalgam of clickthroughs, link votes, number of comments and blind guessing on our part (it's fixed). The list is in no particular order, except that the tab links go in order of the tabs.
We'll also highlight the best headline from each tab that didn't show up on the main page, because tabs need love too.
Without further ado:
Headlines of the Week, October 20 - October 26, 2008
Ontario appeals court upholds ban on pit bulls. Another victory in the war on terrier
Man accuses NYC police of sodomizing him with walkie-talkie. He could be telling the truth, or he could just be talking out of his ass
A man fell off of a ladder / You'd think that his head would be split / But good luck was with him that morning / He fell in a big tank of ... Shaving Cream
Pizza delivery driver says his car's wireless rear-view camera system shows pornography when he drives on a certain street every chance he gets
Federal agents arrest Mongols after 800-year investigation
Transformer blown by Licking Heights, smokes afterward. Optimus Prime very, very relaxed
Catholic church creates secluded private garden to honor sex abuse victims. Where they can sit and meditate and be comforted by the clergy
Baptist minister calls birth control "murder." Your mom's face now a crime scene
"Heckler inaugurated as VU president," interrupts his own acceptance speech more than a dozen times
Man admits stealing copper from cemetery. Cu later, dumbass
Top Headline for each tab:
St. Louis Rams player Richie Incognito fined $35K for penalties, verbally abusing ref, having a totally fake sounding name
Denver Broncos lose LB Boss Bailey for the year, and his brother, cornerback Champ Bailey, for four-to-six weeks. The other brother, Beetle, is doing okay, with Miss Buxley administering tender, loving rubdowns
Unnamed Jets fan spends $400K for the right to watch four-yard-passes on third-and-17 up close, and occasionally have Joe Namath drunkenly hit on his wife
Move over AIG, Iceland is requesting "several billion" dollars more in financial assistance. Threatens to release several new Björk albums if the world financial community does not comply
Ticketmaster fires 300 employees due to financial crunch, collects 10 percent of their severance in convenience fees
Swiss banking industry on the brink, nation may have to revert to corkscrew & knife-based economy
You can Alt+F4 your doors to Win+D your risk but it won't F1. EM emissions from your keyboard can be used to Ctrl+C what you're typing. It's F5ing to know that background interference Ctrl+X's the chances of it happening
Behold the amazing tricks animals use to conceal themselves from predators. Also, there are at least three ninjas in each photo
New research suggests that people will feel better about you when holding something warm. Just don't get too ambitious on your first attempt, ok?
Heather Mills masterminds the world's most effective diet, loses millions of pounds in seven months
Mariah Carey launches a design contest for her new scent. How do you draw a fart?
Judge at the Phil Spector murder retrial warns potential jurors to disregard prior agendas, Spector's hair
Alaska's black population says he has felt ignored by Palin
Ted Stevens fate to be decided by a jury of his peers. Still no word on where they found 12 giant assholes
13 Fake Presidential candidacies including Pat Paulsen, Pogo, Steven Colbert, Bill & Opus, Walter Mondale
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