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(Some Guy)   Baptist minister calls birth control "murder." Your mom's face now a crime scene   (kvue.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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8582 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Oct 2008 at 12:50 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



381 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2008-10-22 12:01:14 PM  
Some hippies call eating meat murder.

If birth Control is murder, then what is a miscarriage, 2nd degree manslaughter?

If every baby was born healthy and there were no miscarriages etc, he might have a point. We are imperfect beings, that's how the universe works.
 
2008-10-22 12:02:00 PM  
Your mom's face now a crime scene

I lol'd

+1 subby
 
2008-10-22 12:06:53 PM  
Fundies don't like sex
Anything that gives you joy
They want to squash it
 
2008-10-22 12:10:51 PM  

xanadian: Fundies don't like sex Anything that gives you joy They want to squash it


"Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy." ~~ H. L. Mencken
 
2008-10-22 12:12:31 PM  
I'm gonna wear two condoms tonight just to spite this guy. I won't be getting any, but still.

/+1!
 
2008-10-22 12:15:13 PM  
images1.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size


I call murder on that!
 
2008-10-22 12:22:22 PM  
Goddamnit smitty...Coffee up the nose hurts!
 
2008-10-22 12:26:48 PM  
A Southern Baptist leader and teacher has a message for women: Taking birth control pills is "murder" and a "sin."

Really? God told YOU that personally? Then why doesn't he tell your followers that personally as well?

What's that, God didn't actually tell you explicitly? You made it up in your head and assumed it's God's will?

Then STFU
 
2008-10-22 12:27:47 PM  
"I wear two condoms. Before sex I take one off and feel like a wild man!"
- D. Miller
 
2008-10-22 12:30:11 PM  
The dude is entitled to his opinion. However, preaching it to a congregation like it's fact, makes him a jerkwad. He probably hates abortion, too. When will these whackos figure out that to get rid of abortion, you need some damn fine birth control. Dealing in reality is apparently not something this guy is familiar with.

Also Baptists have "preachers" not "priests." Duh.
 
2008-10-22 12:32:34 PM  
+1 you rock subby
 
2008-10-22 12:33:02 PM  
This might be shirt-worthy.
 
2008-10-22 12:33:49 PM  
1. Baptists don't have "priests". They have preachers and pastors. Priests are for those beer swillin', Vatican lovin, Mary-worshipin' papists.

2. Baptist preachers are pricks and hypocritical bastards.

//Grew up as a Southern Baptist
///saw it all firsthand
 
2008-10-22 12:46:47 PM  

xanadian: Fundies don't like sex
Anything that gives you joy
They want to squash it


i.dailymail.co.ukView Full Size


Hi, Koo!
 
2008-10-22 12:52:18 PM  
Headline of the Year material.

+1
 
2008-10-22 12:53:34 PM  
Great headline. Good jerb Subby.
 
2008-10-22 12:54:23 PM  
+1 for rudest headline of the month easy.

Mangificulent!
 
2008-10-22 12:54:29 PM  
HAHA headline is farking fantastic subby
 
2008-10-22 12:54:30 PM  
Saying abortion is murder? Well, I disagree, but it's not a completely absurd proposition. It depends on whether you think a fetus is a human being fully vested with rights, which a defensible position. I'm pro-choice, but think intelligent people of goodwill can disagree on this point.

Saying birth control is murder? That's farking insane. Clearly, fertilization does not take place, but if that's your (totally delusional) standard of what constitutes "murder", abstinence is equally murderous.
 
2008-10-22 12:54:40 PM  
This guy also believes Jesus was born from a virgin womb, then died, rose from the dead and ascended bodily into heaven.

Why would you listen to a guy like that?
 
2008-10-22 12:54:42 PM  
that's a good t shirt
 
2008-10-22 12:54:43 PM  

GWShenlong05: Headline of the Year material.


It would be if not for the priest/pastor error noted by others.
 
2008-10-22 12:54:51 PM  
What's a Baptist priest?

And the rest of the headline... meh.
 
2008-10-22 12:54:54 PM  
A worthwhile tshirt?
 
2008-10-22 12:55:12 PM  
I'd be curious to hear his opinion on claw hammers, motor oil, and plastic bags.
 
2008-10-22 12:55:34 PM  

xanadian: Fundies don't like sex


I read that as "Fudgies don't like sex."

I don't know what that would have meant, but it made me laugh anyway.

Fudgies.
 
2008-10-22 12:55:37 PM  
Bravo!

When I was your age we didn't have these fancy birth control methods. Like pulling out!
 
2008-10-22 12:55:51 PM  
Well, as baptists like to speak about the independence of the local church, I'm happy to say that his opinion represents nobody but himself.

/baptist
//snipped
///ouch!
 
2008-10-22 12:56:10 PM  
I'm going to commit some murdering in the office bathroom
 
2008-10-22 12:56:55 PM  
Funny!

Seriously, faced with losing all of their hard-earned political clout, the politico-religionist franchise is descending into bathos

.
 
2008-10-22 12:57:08 PM  

carmody: This guy also believes Jesus was born from a virgin womb, then died, rose from the dead and ascended bodily into heaven.

Why would you listen to a guy like that?


If that's what you've been told your entire life, it doesn't seem ridiculous. However, if you're lucky enough to later hear another, equally ridiculous religious story, recognize it for how ridiculous it is, and then reflect on your own beliefs...
 
2008-10-22 12:57:26 PM  

FeeltheIllinoise: I'm going to commit some murdering in the office bathroom


That's farking gross but funny at the same time.
 
2008-10-22 12:57:41 PM  
Ok, since my body is built to attempt reproduction every 28 days, I guess I'm a murder machine.

/just practicing
 
2008-10-22 12:58:10 PM  

Crosshair:
If every baby was born healthy and there were no miscarriages etc, he might have a point.


There are no circumstances under which he might have a point.
 
Slu
2008-10-22 12:58:21 PM  
Awesome headline!
 
2008-10-22 12:58:34 PM  

SusanIvanova: Clearly, fertilization does not take place


Unless its an IUD... IUDs prevent implantation of the zygote.

Not that I agree a clump of cells is a human though
 
2008-10-22 12:58:46 PM  
/puts palms together
//fingers up
///bows at waist to subby
////+1
 
2008-10-22 12:58:48 PM  

TravelingFreakshow: This might be shirt-worthy.


Hear, hear!

I can accept the preaching against abortion, but the "every seed is sacred" backup for preaching against masturbation, birth control, etc. loses me in a hurry. It all comes down to premarital sex being a sin, but they don't need to elaborate on the specifics, right? You're sinning by fornicating already, and have accepted it, so what effectiveness does railing against wearing a condom, taking the pill, or 69'ing have?

Not that I could come close to actually living out this rule, but it is interesting to think about how many problems wouldn't exist if people could remain chaste. Teen pregnancies, and unwanted pregnancies in general, std's, infidelity, stalker ex-gf/bf's, date rapes... all gone?

/crazy
//just hypothesizing here
 
2008-10-22 12:58:52 PM  
Dr. White declined a request for an on-camera interview Tuesday, citing a busy schedule. In an e-mail message, he said he's not against all forms of birth control.

Maybe he believes swallowing is just battery, not murder.
 
2008-10-22 12:59:02 PM  
yes, yummy yummy murder.

wait, what?
 
2008-10-22 12:59:15 PM  
i392.photobucket.comView Full Size


Well done, Subby. Well done.
 
2008-10-22 12:59:19 PM  
...so our nads are only a prison for brazillians?
 
2008-10-22 12:59:29 PM  
God says NSFW (new window)
 
2008-10-22 12:59:35 PM  
Bill_Wick's_Friend

Hi, Koo!


Thread over man, thread over...enjoy the ride home.....zingmeister!!11
 
2008-10-22 12:59:49 PM  

theoriginalslash: What's a Baptist priest?

And the rest of the headline... meh.



Ooooh, somebody doesn't like facials......
 
2008-10-22 12:59:58 PM  

Crosshair: then what is a miscarriage, 2nd degree manslaughter?


A natural death, troll.

But anyway, just came in to say....baptist priest, subby? Comeon.
 
2008-10-22 01:00:00 PM  
The force is strong with this subby

+1
 
2008-10-22 01:00:09 PM  
I'm getting a shirt. Good one shirtmitter!
 
2008-10-22 01:00:27 PM  
BEST HEADLINE EVAR!!! Thanks subby...now I have to clean the soup I HAD in my mouth off the keyboard.
 
2008-10-22 01:01:11 PM  
FTFA: In an e-mail message, he said he's not against all forms of birth control.

He went full retard in the sermon, but doesn't actually believe it? I'm shocked and appalled that a religious figure would preach about something they don't really support.
 
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