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(Daily Bull)   The Daily Bull's 2nd Anniversary Extravaganza   ( divider line
    More: Cool  
•       •       •

2561 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Jan 2003 at 1:26 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

26 Comments     (+0 »)
2003-01-03 01:30:49 AM  
I wasn't even invited to the first one
2003-01-03 01:32:10 AM  
it's teh sux!
2003-01-03 01:32:33 AM  
Man, that sure was extravagant.
2003-01-03 01:34:49 AM  
I got yer daily bull... right here!

[image from too old to be available]
2003-01-03 01:35:44 AM  
Wow! What an extravaganza!
2003-01-03 01:39:27 AM  
very difficult to self-pleasure to
2003-01-03 01:39:40 AM  
"Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. Come inside come inside."
2003-01-03 01:40:26 AM  
D8vo - I had no problem at all.
2003-01-03 01:44:37 AM  
I can't wait to see the 3rd anniversary special, once The Onion/Something Awful/Broken Newz/BBSpot/Random-Fark-Sponsor makes a bold move to acquire them.
2003-01-03 01:52:34 AM  
ACHIMP I always said you had a good site, I don't know why you have wasted so much time with imockery, that site is garbage, run by a freaky gothic wananbe. It sounds like you want hits, if that is purly the case then imockery is not the place to go, I was linked there for months till I got sick of his site and took down my link and at best, very best the site sent 2 -6 people a day.

Just worry about your site and people will come, and even if they don't, just enjoy writting and coming up with cool things.

Overall just enjoy it, and best of luck in the future.
2003-01-03 02:16:24 AM  
Congrats Achimp. Now get back to is over!
2003-01-03 02:19:21 AM  
Ishkur is cutting edge.
2003-01-03 03:24:02 AM  
That kid is classic. Need to give him a medal or something...
2003-01-03 03:27:35 AM  
THIS IS CU.....oh.
2003-01-03 04:55:31 AM  
Hey, check it out, a satire news site! Alrighty, let's take a look here... okay... uh-huh... I see...


Oh dear, I'm afraid this site isn't very good. And now that I've said it, I'm sure a bunch of Farkers are going to rush to The Daily Bull's defense by saying stuff like, "Hey man, what's your problem? I don't see you putting out your own website. And if you did, it'd probably suck." Don't you hate it when that happens? Like, you can't criticize someone else's site unless you have one of your own. Just like how you can't say "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones" sucks because you're not a filmmaker, or talk bad about Britney Spears because you didn't put out your own teeny-bopper record. Well, worry no more, because now you can have your very own satire news site! Just follow these simple steps:

1. Come up with some absurd headline like: "Area Man Spends Too Much Time Browsing in Video Store, Forgets to Pick Up Gallon of Milk On Way Home". You see, it's funny because this kind of stuff really happens in real life but would never get reported in a regular newspaper because it's so trivial and un-newsworthy. So by writing it up as if it were a real news story, all of a sudden it becomes funny. Get it? Get it?

2. Make up Top 10 Lists with silly titles like: "Top Ten Reasons Why They Hate Us" and then come up with equally silly answers such as "10. George W. Bush keeps pronouncing the names of their countries incorrectly... 9. We refuse to cancel the TV show 'Friends'... 8. We keep putting out stupid satire news sites..." and so on. Wee, aren't we having fun yet?

3. By the way, notice how that last "joke" was self-referential? Self-referentiality is an important element of every satire news site because it shows you are so clever, see? Ha ha!

4. It helps if you know how to use Photoshop. Then you can do cool things like paint horns onto Martha Stewart's head and create a funny picture that accompanies your hilarious satire news feature: "Martha Stewart Dies in Horrible Freak Sewing Machine Acccident, Must Redecorate Satan's Living Room for Rest of Eternity."

5. Once your site is up and running, make sure you buy a FARK classified ad so that everyone will visit it and leave encouraging comments like, "It's no Onion, but I got a good chuckle out of it. Keep up the good work!"

And if anyone has the nerve to criticise your site, just remember, they aren't the ones putting the hard working into creating a satire news website, you are!
2003-01-03 06:11:21 AM  
Hey Chimpy, good article... I suspected that you'd had an article linked on fark again because my website stats went up too (*plug* my website,, is one of the sites linked from the daily bull's lickle side panel *unplug*)

I'm not a fan of I-Mockery either... saying that you can't get a link because you don't get a certain amount of hits is just totally stupid, the link should be on the quality of the site, not the amount of visitors it gets.... Sounds like it's run by a record company executive or something.

Some people don't like it, fair enough, can't please everybody all the time (as I know :-D)
2003-01-03 06:24:52 AM  
Wait a minute...

Achimp: you depend on other sites for traffic?

2003-01-03 08:51:04 AM  
Thank you. That's three minutes of my life I can never get back.
2003-01-03 09:03:19 AM  
why would you want to be linked to by i-mockery? according to you're ranked much, much higher than they are.. which is a little strange since I've never heard of the daily bull.. but I have seen i-mockery before..

though that being said.. I wasn't really impressed with either site..
2003-01-03 09:12:01 AM  
I got yer daily bull... right here!

Coleslaw, is Night Court still on TV anywhere? God I miss that farking show...

I don't know why you have wasted so much time with imockery, that site is garbage

CG, everybody knows what an ass you've become, so trying to save face by randomly attacking me just makes you come off as even more biatchy and infantile.

saying that you can't get a link because you don't get a certain amount of hits is just totally stupid, the link should be on the quality of the site, not the amount of visitors it gets....

The real reason I don't link to AChimp, and he knows this as well as anyone else, is cuz I've never found his content particularly funny. He posts on the I-Mockery forums on a regular basis, and he's far funnier on there than what he writes on his site. Hell, he should start a new site and do comics based on all of the other web sites out there, cuz he's done some funny ones in the past.

Furthermore, half of my affiliates get JACK for traffic and barely send me any visitors... but I do enjoy their content. Nobody gives a shiat about, but it's a farking awesome site that cares about some of the greatest shows ever created, and that's why I link to it.

I do respect AChimp for sticking with what he does even with all the criticism it gets, because with mega-popular satire sites like The Onion out there, AND with many other struggling satire sites, it's gotta be a biatch to stay motivated. There's always gonna be people that don't like your work, yet they can't even put the effort to create something of their own, so just ignore 'em and keep working. That's always been my advice to you and any other site that wants to try to get a good audience... write, write, write.

So congrats on your 2 years AChimp. And yeah, I still won't link to you. ;)

Thank you. That's three minutes of my life I can never get back.

[image from too old to be available]
But with Rick Ostrov's "Power Reading", you can cut that two minutes down to 20 seconds!
2003-01-03 10:49:34 AM  

Your post is an indelible black mark from which the field of writing known as satire will never recover. Thanks to your logical deduction, we now know that any slight amusement or laughter provoked by such writing is the result of pure coincidence.

And to think the Onion makes money off of this scam!
2003-01-03 10:58:40 AM  
I knew the kind of reaction I would provoke the moment I posted this (incidentally, "extravaganza" had quotes around it when I submitted it).

I have achieved the result I wanted. For the first time. :D
2003-01-03 01:19:07 PM  
2003-01-03 02:28:37 PM  
AChimp - I've seen you around for awhile - I used to hang out in the BBSpot Message Boards as 'jeditom' way back in the day.

Anyway - Your stuff is amusing and I got a kick out of it (even Heaven's Gate Doing "Great").

Keep up the hard work - many do appreciate it, though they may not be as aggressive as the asshats. ;-(
2003-01-03 04:03:15 PM  
Thank you for the nice comments. :)
2003-01-04 10:26:03 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
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