Of course she was depressed about not having his baby. No kid, no meal ticket for life.

She's only 28? I thought she was 40 caked with makeup and plastic surgery.

Rape her and leave her for dead I say.

I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

BennytheKoolAidMan: I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

Yes his daughter is the CEO of Playboy.

She actually thought he would buy the cow when he owns the dairy farm?

Captain_Sissypants: BennytheKoolAidMan: I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

Yes his daughter is the CEO of Playboy.



Damn, she was b 1952, and his youngest kid was in 1991. One sonm looks just like him-

With all his money and the women lining up, why does he never pick one/some who are naturally beautiful? Why always with the plastic chest and artificial face?

I'm not implying the current ones aren't nice looking, but I'd love to see what they look like without the obviously massive amount of work put into it.

Captain_Sissypants: BennytheKoolAidMan: I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

Yes his daughter is the CEO of Playboy.

That's why the mag went to crap.....Well. Not really but it's worse off now.

Captain_Sissypants: Rape her and leave her for dead I say.

This.

So his Cawk is shooting out dust now? His Vas Deferens Tubes are probably all burned out from overuse in the 60s and 70s, much like the Enterprise's Jefferies Tubes after a long running battle thru the Neutral Zone.

Carl Sagan's Ghost

What does his right lung have to do with his John Thomas?

Maybe he has a narrow urethra.

Peekoo: With all his money and the women lining up, why does he never pick one/some who are naturally beautiful? Why always with the plastic chest and artificial face?

I'm not implying the current ones aren't nice looking, but I'd love to see what they look like without the obviously massive amount of work put into it.

Remarkable_Anus: Captain_Sissypants: BennytheKoolAidMan: I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

Yes his daughter is the CEO of Playboy.

That's why the mag went to crap.....Well. Not really but it's worse off now.

Actually Playboy was massively failing in the 80s and only turned around after his daughter took over.

Heff could have already been sniped and just not told any of these bimbos hoping to get pregnant and inherit part of his fortune.

Apparently all he does is jerk off while the girl's touch themselves or something like that, no actual sex. I heard that from someone who could have made it up. The end.

Carl Sagan's Ghost: So his Cawk is shooting out dust now? His Vas Deferens Tubes are probably all burned out from overuse in the 60s and 70s, much like the Enterprise's Jefferies Tubes after a long running battle thru the Neutral Zone.

Dude, you just spilled nerd ALL over the Playboy thread!

Funbags: Peekoo: With all his money and the women lining up, why does he never pick one/some who are naturally beautiful? Why always with the plastic chest and artificial face?

I'm not implying the current ones aren't nice looking, but I'd love to see what they look like without the obviously massive amount of work put into it.

Jesus, her doctors are miracle workers. Wow.

I've also wondered why he's always with a certain 'type'. I think it has to do with math.

Out of every hundred Playmate wannabes, let's say 5 have potential for Hef as gf material. Okay, what if most of the applicants are fake blonde/fake breast types? What are you gonna do? If out of the last thousand to send in photos, you weed out the 'no way in hell' rejects, and are left with 45 maybes and they are ALL fake barbies types, where does that leave you?

He's just playing the cards he's been dealt.

SharkInfested: Carl Sagan's Ghost: So his Cawk is shooting out dust now? His Vas Deferens Tubes are probably all burned out from overuse in the 60s and 70s, much like the Enterprise's Jefferies Tubes after a long running battle thru the Neutral Zone.

Dude, you just spilled nerd ALL over the Playboy thread!

I thought Jeffries Tubes were for maintenance access. Why would they burn out?

Saw pics the other day of the purported new twin girlfriends. They seem kinda small up top for Hef.

No SMITTY, If you actually watched the show, or was subjected to it because your girlfriend made you watch as is the case with myself, Holly kept pushing Hef to have children. Hef DIDN'T want anymore kids.

Let this be a lesson to all you ladies out there who keep pressuring a guy to have kids.

Does it really matter.

First, he can always get another one.
Second, he has 4 children...mother nature is proud of him.
Last, he has likely shot more sperm than most of the men in this thread put together.

Sometime a gunslinger just has to retire his gun.
Doesn't mean he wasn't one of the best in the past.

adam1805: Apparently all he does is jerk off while the girl's touch themselves or something like that, no actual sex. I heard that from someone who could have made it up. The end.

You know, I have heard a couple of interviews from women he bedded in the mansion who said the whole event was like a bizarre ritual and he had to have gay porn on in the room to get and stay hard.

Britney Spear's Speculum: No SMITTY, If you actually watched the show ... Hef DIDN'T want anymore kids.


Or if you actually read the article, the words that came out of his own mouth are: "We tried to have a baby earlier this year and it didn't work out," he said. "She became very depressed."

Maybe her womb was a rocky place where his seed could find no purchase?

BennytheKoolAidMan: I feel kind of bad for them. Does Hef have any kids?

His wife lives down the street from the mansion with his two little kids!! Look it up.

Peekoo: With all his money and the women lining up, why does he never pick one/some who are naturally beautiful? Why always with the plastic chest and artificial face?

I'm not implying the current ones aren't nice looking, but I'd love to see what they look like without the obviously massive amount of work put into it.

I agree there. But if you look at some of the old Playboy mags, you'll see lots of natural beauty. I mean Dorothy Stratten was naturally beautiful until her ex boyfriend shot her face off.


Or wait, maybe I'm thinking of Mariel Hemingway:

matthew8762: SharkInfested: Carl Sagan's Ghost: So his Cawk is shooting out dust now? His Vas Deferens Tubes are probably all burned out from overuse in the 60s and 70s, much like the Enterprise's Jefferies Tubes after a long running battle thru the Neutral Zone.

Dude, you just spilled nerd ALL over the Playboy thread!

I thought Jeffries Tubes were for maintenance access. Why would they burn out?

STFU NERD

matthew8762: I thought Jeffries Tubes were for maintenance access. Why would they burn out?

I dunno, it's just a claustrophobic tube that shoots sparks and electrical arcs at Scotty while Kirk yells at him. Then when he makes it stop exploding, the ship starts running better. So you would assume at one point or another, the darned thing would be so damaged by the aforementioned sparks and explosions that it would need to be replaced in a shipyard.

/proud to spill Nerd all over a Playboy thread.

Do you know what kind of retarded, down syndrome babies he'd produce? thank god. poor kid