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(   Cloning cult 'Clonaid' claims first human clone has been born   ( divider line
    More: Interesting  
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3798 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Dec 2002 at 11:32 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2002-12-26 11:34:26 PM  
2002-12-26 11:34:57 PM  
we can only hope its a clone of Ronald Reagan. amen.
2002-12-26 11:36:00 PM  
Fb- is the fa--nevermind.
2002-12-26 11:36:12 PM  
Are they the ones that always organize those rock festivals with Willy Nelson?
2002-12-26 11:36:38 PM  
This could lead only to good things....
2002-12-26 11:37:15 PM  
Woohoo! Go Canadian cults!
2002-12-26 11:38:39 PM  
if jesus knew, he'd be so pissed, because in the bible there is that line...
2002-12-26 11:39:56 PM  
The Raelians...believe life on earth was established by extraterrestrials who arrived in flying saucers 25,000 years ago, and that humans themselves were created by cloning.

The movement's founder, Rael - the former French journalist Claude Vorilhon - lives in Quebec.He describes himself as a prophet and claims that cloning will enable humanity to attain eternal life.

In other news, stores in Quebec are suffering from dipping holiday sales, except for an unusual but welcomed boost in the sales of Cool-Aid and cyanide.
2002-12-26 11:40:31 PM  
We can only hope it's a Ronald Reagan destroying baby.
2002-12-26 11:41:18 PM  
2002-12-26 11:41:55 PM  
"Clonaid was founded in 1997 by the Raelian cult, which claims life on earth was created through genetic engineering by extraterrestrials"

Hell yeah, man...can't have folks thinking they crawled out of the sludge & evolved on their own
2002-12-26 11:42:25 PM  
Immaculate conception, born on or near Christmas, associated with an oddball religious cult...

2002-12-26 11:43:05 PM  
Have you been to these people's website ( -- site is really slow, must have a ton of traffic today)? Their cult leader is a complete psycho. He dresses in a toga - there is a video of him giving some talk. Really creepy stuff. Oh, and he's French.
2002-12-26 11:44:23 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
2002-12-26 11:46:00 PM  
50,000 followers world-wide! cripes i hope that's an exageration
2002-12-26 11:46:09 PM  
Oh great, we definitely need another cult - especially one that clones!

Is there another comet due anytime soon?
2002-12-26 11:46:22 PM  
There should be a Lord of the Rings cult, that way, they can release more dvds than ever. who cares if you have the original version, you NEED the version with 12 hundred pages of storyboard. A feature that promises boundless amounts of nosepicking and inhaling of cheetos.
2002-12-26 11:47:30 PM  
heck, its almost as believable as the Water parting on the Nile-Moses thing....

well, maybe not....
2002-12-26 11:48:56 PM  
The Raelians believe that life was put on Earth by aliens. Their wacko leader (a former race car driver) claims to have been visited in 1972 by these aliens and basically transformed into the second coming.
2002-12-26 11:49:25 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-26 11:50:51 PM  
Have you heard the raelians motto: "At least we're not scientology!"... I think its a winner.
2002-12-26 11:51:44 PM  
He describes himself as a prophet and claims that cloning will enable humanity to attain eternal life.

Coo Coo Coo Coo
2002-12-26 11:51:47 PM  
French scientist and member of the Raelian sect, Brigitte Boisselier, told the AFP news agency the baby is a girl.

Ok, so this guy is a member of a cult that believes we were created by aliens. Fine. But if you expect me to take for truth the words of a frenchman, you gotta be crazy!
2002-12-26 11:53:50 PM  
Kekko_Kamen, I'll second that!
2002-12-26 11:54:02 PM  
There should be a "time until cloned babies and whacko cult members found dead with Nikes on" pool... Clones would be the perfect way to keep the cult going while you head for the mothership.
2002-12-26 11:55:51 PM  
Everyone knows the only way to clone a human being is with a magic hammock.
2002-12-26 11:56:27 PM  
So how many heads does it have?
2002-12-26 11:57:22 PM  
forget the human clones, get to work on the 4 assed monkey
2002-12-26 11:58:40 PM  
Now with image to enhance my comment
[image from too old to be available]

Coo Coo... Coo Coo...
2002-12-26 11:58:46 PM  
Oh boy, read this -

"Ostensibly, these techniques are related to what has been reported as the main tenants of the movement: "masturbation, communal orgasm, sexual freedom and pleasure..." (Reuters New Service, August 6, 1997)"

I'd better join up now, they're SURE to honor me, with my practices, as some sort of high-level entity...
2002-12-27 12:00:24 AM  
Aliens in France!
Now I know why they surrender. Pod people... all of them.
2002-12-27 12:03:06 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

"You're the leader? But you don't look anything like the beans!"
2002-12-27 12:05:03 AM  
do they get the aliens to examine the clone for quality of workmanship?

"Nah, this one's just really shoddily made. It's uneven, the eyes are entirely the wrong colour, and it smells funny. Throw this one out and start over..."
2002-12-27 12:09:55 AM  
"masturbation, communal orgasm, sexual freedom and pleasure..."

Yeah know? Best not to judge too quickly. I think I might attend a few services in the interest of tolorance. I wonder if they ordain...
2002-12-27 12:12:09 AM  
"I'll be cloned for Christmas...
... If only in my genes."
2002-12-27 12:12:58 AM  
Cool this news comes out right after that other cult figured out how to transfer human conciousness into machines. What was their name...? I think they called themselves the Core...

/end obscure reference

2002-12-27 12:13:17 AM  
I'm about to go to bed, but if someone wants to check, I think these are the same guys who did some mass suicide-murders a few years ago in France and Quebec.

2002-12-27 12:19:50 AM  
Hey, there you go: Mass-cloning to facilitate mass-suicide. And the other practical applications of the waste of human life, all without having to waste a single original human life.

That reminds me, gotta call and check on my ticket to Hell...
2002-12-27 12:20:38 AM  

Sounds like an organization dedicated to the cloning of the koolaid man.

I can just imagine it now...

"Quick, they're about to reach the wall! There's no time"

A deep echo rings through the air... "Oh Yeah!"

"Oh crap."

Then, hundreds of koolaid man clones break through the wall...

It's a scary thought... a mildly refreshing and thirst-quenching thought, but a scary thought nonetheless...
2002-12-27 12:38:56 AM  
"You see we clone people so that we may all kill ourselves by drinking the special Koolade (sp?). Then the clones will clone themselves and they too will drink the koolade, and so on and so on."

Hilarity ensues
2002-12-27 12:51:55 AM  
I wondering about the validity of their claims.
After all: their leader is French.

meh. stoopid cults. I hate them.
2002-12-27 01:11:13 AM  
Clonaid? Did they happen to clone Enya, by any chance? Always thought that bunch was dodgy.
2002-12-27 01:20:02 AM  
A lesson for us all. If you name your group Anything-aid, you will gain no support and everyone will laugh at you.
2002-12-27 01:27:31 AM  
Press Conference:
"Um yeah, this is our clone, but like, the person we cloned it from, um like, died a week ago, and umm, we lost the body, but it's really a clone."
2002-12-27 01:56:34 AM  
This better turn out to be a hoax from the cult, or this girl is going to get treated so horribly. Probably killed by some fundy before shes 21.
2002-12-27 02:01:23 AM  

I played Total Annihilation, too. ;)
2002-12-27 02:26:35 AM  
"Soylent Green is PEOPLE!! It's PEOPLE!!"
2002-12-27 02:34:14 AM  
Cloneaid: Yeah I went to that show. Man, Willy Nelson put on a great performance, but John Cougar Melloncamp sucked.
2002-12-27 02:41:38 AM  
this article is now on the front page of -- they're buying it... heh.
2002-12-27 02:41:46 AM  
I'm not sure but I think the theory goes:
Evolution happened until we became monkeys and then the aliens came and and cloned us. So your father is an Alien and your mother is an ape, biatch.
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