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(Some lonely Vegas Guy)   Single and alone for the holidays: How to cope   ( divider line
    More: Advice  
•       •       •

9205 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Dec 2002 at 11:55 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

200 Comments     (+0 »)
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2002-12-25 08:14:41 AM  
They forgot:
Make sure to partake of your favorite alcoholic beverage while posting comments that make no sense on FARK.

/raises beer in a toast to farker Blackvampyr
2002-12-25 08:38:01 AM  

meh. I e-mailed this to my buddy last night....didn't think it would get picked...but it did, cool.

The holidays are tough times for some people. It was hard for me when my ex left. Empty condo, no one to share gifts, no one to share sucked.

He just went through a divorce in November.....last night I took him over to my brother's to hang out with my nieces, bro, my dad, and my sis-in-law. He thanked me 4 times driving home..... being around people that care helps bigtime.

2002-12-25 08:43:04 AM  
I'm going to stay in bed sucking down this here case of Guinness and see how much dope I can smoke before I pass out. Then I'm going to abuse my inner child again. Any farkettes wanna come help?
2002-12-25 11:58:25 AM  
Go out to a bar. Plenty of other people in similar situations on a day like this. I'm leaving for one in just a few minutes now.
2002-12-25 11:58:59 AM  
The holidays can be fun... but nothing beats chewing down on a Juicy Pear on the holidays.

Aaaah Teh Friutiness.
2002-12-25 12:01:55 PM  
Oh, by the way. Any hot farkettes just pissed off at the whole Xhristmas happiness and I'm not gettin' any kinda thing and would prefer to bet loved this xhristmas...

Just email me. I have a tounge like a snake.

yes... tounge, I bet thousands of you, especially the literate, are wondering what the hell that is. Well if you're a hot farkette, now's your chance to find out.

fehehehe... Xmas greetings, Farkers.
2002-12-25 12:01:55 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:02:07 PM  
Hahahahah, they forgot to mention work. Single, alone and have to WORK. I guess thats what I get for working at a .com.
2002-12-25 12:02:36 PM  
(Some lonely Vegas Guy)

2002-12-25 12:03:40 PM  
Download some more porn and spend the day fapping your cares away.
2002-12-25 12:05:33 PM  
I like to go down to a homeless shelter and distribute gifts to the needy. Then I go and visit lonely old people who are homebound. Then at night I go and see the kid I sponsor through Bigbrothers and give him some gifts...

...any hot ladies out there feeling a little lonely can drop me a line too.
2002-12-25 12:06:23 PM  
I wasnt going to drink but.... screw it.

*reaches for SoCo and vanilla coke*

Cheers to all that are single. And Cheers to all that are blessed.

If that doesnt help a .44 mag will.....
2002-12-25 12:07:49 PM  
Come to (at?) my house....

[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:07:55 PM  
If you can't be with anyone, enjoy the solitude if you already have friends you hang with throughout the year, because when you DO get a family you'll spend more time entertaining/traveling, and wish you had time to relax, alone, at home.

Come up with a few goals for next year; where you want to be next holiday season, and with whom. Then just relax with a glass of wine or something. If you don't drink, substitute a favorite food, but don't overdo it. Promise to keep your diet (that you abandon at about Thanksgiving) once the new year kicks in.

Avoid too much television, which is manipulative and depressing if you're alone. Rent a movie, play an engrossing video game, take a bath. Give yourself the gift of mental peace, and extinguish the thoughts that you're somehow not doing what you're supposed to be doing, and thus incapable of enjoying yourself.

Or you could just hang out on Fark all damn day, see if I care.
2002-12-25 12:08:15 PM  
Enjoy a cool, refreshing can of Dr. Pepper.
2002-12-25 12:08:43 PM  
awww... poor farkers that are all alone for the holidays. but your not alone if your on fark!
2002-12-25 12:09:38 PM  
2002-12-25 12:11:19 PM  
I'd hit it...
2002-12-25 12:12:44 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:13:07 PM  

Happiness is a warm gun, no? Only kidding.

Well, my girlfriend has made the trek home to Chicago for three weeks, leaving me in the desolate college town of Bloomington, Indiana. College towns are the worst on holidays. How to cope? Buy a bottle of J&B, some chinese take-out ('Cause those wonderful heathens don't celebrate Jesus Day) and rent 5 movies you'd never watch with your girlfriend. And I don't mean porn...that will only depress you.

2002-12-25 12:13:51 PM  
Naked_man has the right idea - uh about the top part - ya that's it.

Also, if you live in Snowland, shovel your elderly neighbour's drive/sidewalk. I hate seeing 70+ year olds pushing wet snow in sub-zero temps. I do this all the time and they usually give me a nice bottle of highly fortified homemeade wine. ;-)
2002-12-25 12:14:39 PM  
Vodka, sake, and abstinine (spelling). I guarantee that the penguins will never leave you. >D
2002-12-25 12:15:31 PM  
THe article is a bit vapid and self-contradictory (vis: points 3 & 4 -- which is it ?!?) but the comments on the right side made me LOL. Then again Im easily amused.

Merry Xmas farkerz

(gotta love the typos, heheh)
2002-12-25 12:15:44 PM  
My girlfirend is 1000 miles away spending the holidays with her family. I am sitting at work. I got suckered in to coming in today, because there is a slight possibilty that one of our self-loathing customers would need help today. Been here 3 and a half hours... Not a single phone call. Fark me! Can anyone send me some SFW Boobies?
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2002-12-25 12:15:52 PM  
As the greatest company on earth (Despair, Inc.) says: "If you find yourself struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. And yet you are alone. So very alone."

For this holiday morning I chose to play free-association with my CD collection. Put on a song and see what it makes me feel like playing next. For your approval (or more likely scorn, but what do I care) I offer the first hour or two of "songs to spend a holiday alone with":

"Falling Down Blue"Blue Rodeo (live)
"Selfless, Cold, and Composed"Ben Folds Five
"Mess"Ben Folds Fivefeels like my life...
"Fly By Night"Rush
"Madrigal"Rushmemories of an ex-girlfriend
"Entre Nous"Rush
"Man in the Wilderness"Styx
"Cinema Show"Genesis (live)
"Here's Where the Story Ends"The Sundays
"She Blinded Me With Science"The SyndicateNot the Thomas Dolby song; you've never heard of this group.
OpenCowboy JunkiesA great, depressing CD
"The Blizzard"Judy CollinsIt's trying to snow here.

Yes, I do like 1970s rock and especially progressive rock.
And yes, I put way too much effort into making an HTML table. I hope it renders OK.
2002-12-25 12:16:44 PM  
(Some lonely Vegas Guy)


bahhh, not really L.W..... heading to my brother again today.... I MIGHT call this girl I've had my eye on for a while just to say Merry Christmas.

ZAZ [TotalFark]
2002-12-25 12:17:09 PM  
Hey! What happened to my HTML table? Oh well, you can figure it out yourself. And Merry Christmas everyone, or politically correct generic holiday greetings if you prefer.
2002-12-25 12:17:52 PM  
For all if you hot single farkettes, Ill make your christmas bright!! :)

2002-12-25 12:18:58 PM  
Download "Crazy for Her", and "Party by Myself" by Dan Bern. Oh yeah. Hide the bullets first, and you'll find you can only knock yourself out with the butt of the gun.
2002-12-25 12:19:59 PM  
of you not if you!
2002-12-25 12:20:05 PM  
do 1-900 numbers work today?
2002-12-25 12:20:30 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:22:12 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:22:42 PM  
There's a frigging nor'easter hitting Long Island this morning. Highest tides I've seen in two years. Merry Xmas!
2002-12-25 12:23:16 PM  
I had planned to go home to Kentucky for the holidays, but five inches of snow have left me stranded in St. Louis instead. My boyfriend is spending the holiday with his {ahem} wife. But I am coping with a large, steaming mug of hot chocolate that is fortified by a healthy shot of butterscotch schnapps and by listening to the They Might Be Giants "Holidayland" CD. Merry f***ing Xmas.
2002-12-25 12:23:16 PM  
Feh. I'm working on my second bottle of champagne here - Mimosa! - but it's not working enough. Not really sure I should be sad being here alone though. I didn't go home as I was supposed to get laid off Dec 31, so I wanted to work as much as I could before the end. Last Friday though, they informed me I'm good till June 30, but alas, a little late to book airfare. So Yay! And Boo-Hoo!! And there is NOTHING on TV if you haven't checked already.
2002-12-25 12:24:29 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:26:30 PM  
i'm right here with ya. i volunteered to work, though, because everybody else had family to spend xmas family lives in FL, so i may as well be here! it's not too bad...i'm the only one here and i get to play on the net for 12 hours and get paid well for it:-D
2002-12-25 12:28:21 PM  
A case of refreshing Dr. Pepper is all you need to get you through the night.
2002-12-25 12:29:52 PM  
Remember, that the only thing dating some gets you is sex. Sooner rather than later, all couples wind up hating each other and wanting to tear out each other's throats.

God gave us an two hands in case one of them got a sore wrist from masturbating.

You are never alone as long as you can choke your own snake.
2002-12-25 12:32:23 PM  
So Aphexcoil3, if you use both hands at once is that a threesome?
2002-12-25 12:32:37 PM  
[image from too old to be available] + [image from too old to be available] Washed down with some new DVDs
2002-12-25 12:32:49 PM  
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2002-12-25 12:34:54 PM  
A healthy dose of quality boobie links would be nice, too.
2002-12-25 12:35:24 PM  
This article would have been handy a couple of days ago....Then again, no it wouldn't, it's pretty much shiat.

4. Give yourself some quiet time.

Isn't that kind of synonomous with being alone ?

2002-12-25 12:35:42 PM  
What part of Vegas do you live in? We were somewhere between Craig and Ann Roads.

I was living in Vegas two years ago at Christmas.... I'm from New England (and am back here gain, waiting for a Nor-Easter), and it's just not the same to have those kinds of temps at Christmas.

Merry merry anyway.....
2002-12-25 12:36:14 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-12-25 12:36:34 PM  
I am a drunk ass. Vote for my last comment with your heart people, miracles do happen.
2002-12-25 12:38:51 PM  
Masturbation. Lots and lots of masturbation.
2002-12-25 12:39:21 PM  
Naked man... yeah the weather outside looks like shiat.. at least its just rain... no snow yet
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