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(CNN)   Court give traffic violators a choice, pay the fine or sing a Christmas carol   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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2341 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Dec 2002 at 6:03 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

28 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-12-24 10:38:51 AM  
Totally sweet! I know every twisted, perverted XXXmas song ever written. OOOOOOOHHHHHHH!!! Pick me, Mr. Traffic Court Judge! Me first! Me first!
2002-12-24 06:04:55 PM  
pay the fine, of course.
2002-12-24 06:04:56 PM  
I'd sing..then get fined.
2002-12-24 06:04:57 PM  
I would _SO_ pay up.
2002-12-24 06:06:39 PM  
I'd sing "The Twelve Days of Christmas".
Right with the first few words of the first verse you'd get hustled out of there.
2002-12-24 06:07:34 PM  
heh...Can't wait til some non-christian religious group
biatches about this.

"da da da"
2002-12-24 06:07:58 PM  
I'd sing the Vandals 'Oi to the World', not technically a carol but it still fills me with Christmas cheer.
2002-12-24 06:14:39 PM  
Awww, a missed use of the sappy tag! Does it even exist anymore?
2002-12-24 06:16:44 PM  
"Dreidel dreidel dreidel, I made it out of clay. When it's dry and ready, oh dreidel I shall play!"

What? That doesn't count? Up yours Nazi scum!
2002-12-24 06:17:28 PM  
Ding! Fries are done.
2002-12-24 06:17:44 PM  
And then I ask myself, "What would Moses do?"
2002-12-24 06:17:53 PM  
Haji was punk just like any other boy
And he never had no trouble
until he started up his Oi,
safe in the garage or singing in the tub.
Till Haji went to far and he plugged in at the pub
Twas a cold Christmas eve when Trevor and the skins
Popped in for a pint and to nick a back of Crisps
Trevor liked the music but not the unity
So he unwound Haji's turban and knocked him to his knees

If God came down on Christmas day
I know exactly what he'd say
He'd say "Oi to punks and Oi to the skins
But Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

Haji was a bloody mess, he ran out thru the crowd
He said "we'll meet again we are bloody but not unbowed"
Trevor called his bluff and told him where to meet
Christmas day on the roof down at 20 Oxford Street

If God came down on Christmas day
I know exactly what he'd say
He'd say "Oi to punks and Oi to the skins
But Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

On the roof with the nun chucks Trevor broke a lot of bones
But Haji had a sword like that guy in Indiana Jones
Police sirens wailing, a bloody dying man
Haji was alone and abandoned his band
Trevor was there fading and so full of hate
When the skins left him there and went down the fire escape (Oi! Oi!)
But then Haji saw the north star shining more than ever
So he made a tourniquet from his turban saving Trevor
They repelled down the roof with the rest of the turban
and went back to the pub where they bought each other bourbon

If God came down on Christmas day
I know exactly what he'd say
He'd say "Oi to punks and Oi to the skins
But Oi to the world and everybody wins!"

If God came down on Christmas day
I know exactly what he'd say
He'd say "Oi to punks and Oi to the skins
But Oi to the world and everybody wins!"
2002-12-24 06:53:45 PM  
Yep, pay up or submit to christianity....Maybe i'm wrong and didn't learn much in school, but I though that separation of church and state meant something, like, the separation of church and state. Farking christians get the easy was out, what a joke.
2002-12-24 06:56:41 PM  
Singing a christmas song = submitting to christianity???

wtf is wrong with you?
2002-12-24 07:03:28 PM  
Ok, not necessarily "submitting" to christianity, sorry. Christmas is a christian holiday that is supposedly supposed to "celebrate" the birth of their savior. So what would "christmas" songs have to do with this? Everything.
2002-12-24 07:10:07 PM  
Hey, if it gets me out of a traffic ticket I'll sing a dance of joy to Schlabotnik, the pagan god of bad cheese.
2002-12-24 07:38:10 PM  
Never heard that, but it sure made me smile. Thanks. :)
2002-12-24 07:46:03 PM  
yqw HowlingFrog :) download it if you get a chance it's on Kazaa, and happy christmas to you and everyone else btw cos its gone midnte now
2002-12-24 08:18:04 PM  
You people are idiots. I'm an atheist, and I'm all for separation of church and state. But we're talking about a farkING CHRISTMAS CAROL! It's not like I'd magically be converted to Christianity by singing "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas"! And if it were to offend anyone THAT much, they could just pay the fine like a person normally would, anyway.

Why don't you liberal whiners biatch about the fact that California public schools have a mandatory class where kids read from the Koran, recite Muslim prayers, adopt Muslim names for the class, stage a Jihad, and so on. Why do you only care about separation of *Christianity* and state? How come any other religion gets a free pass?
2002-12-24 08:20:26 PM  
It's even worse, I just read the article. You morons are complaining about JINGLE BELLS and RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER! I could maybe see your point if it was "The First Noel" or another religious Christmas song. Get a farking life and quit agonizing over whether somewhere out there, some idiot is offended by Jingle Bells.
2002-12-24 08:30:03 PM  
I am offended by Joan Jett's joyless version of, "The Little Drummer Boy."
buz [BareFark]
2002-12-24 08:30:39 PM  
Jingle Bells, Batman Smells, Robin laid an egg....
Batmobile broke a wheel and the joker got away, AY!

Why, no I'm not bored at all, here......
(waiting for the Mrs to get offa work)
2002-12-24 08:44:02 PM  
We three kings of orient are,
one in a taxi, one in a car,
one on a scooter, bibbing his hooooter,
fallowing yonder star.

no, i'm not bored either
2002-12-24 08:45:31 PM  
You all also keep forgetting where this is happening....Tennessee, the fvcking heart of the the Bible belt. I doubt anyone willl complain.
2002-12-24 09:56:15 PM  
no one ever expects the Tennessee Inquisition!

btwm if this was on at sunday nite, it would be a nice Sopranos episode.
2002-12-24 09:56:52 PM  
sigh - "btw" (I can't type for shiate tonite)
2002-12-24 11:35:28 PM  
I'd jump on the wheels of steel and do a lil' tribute to Jam Master Jay:



Then I'd pay up.
2002-12-25 03:13:05 AM  
Get a speeding ticket, you do Christmas carols. Shoplifters, I understand, have to do show tunes. (How about a little something from "South Pacific"?)
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