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(Some Guy's Sweet-Ass Girlfriend)   When a police officer asks you how you're doing, lunging at him in his patrol car and saying "I'm high on mushrooms, dude" might not be the appropriate response   (statesmanjournal.com) divider line 60
    More: Dumbass  
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11205 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Aug 2008 at 7:32 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-08-24 12:56:02 AM
i3.photobucket.com

/approves
 
2008-08-24 01:03:45 AM
If you happen to be high on mushrooms, it is actually quite an appropriate response.
 
2008-08-24 01:08:44 AM
FTA: Adams was arrested on charges of assaulting a police officer, interfering with a police animal...

LOL WUT? "You got into the path of my dog's muzzle after I gave him an attack command,"?

The rest of the article is proof positive that you always have a babysitter when using psychoactive substances recreationally, but that particularly stuck out as somewhat silly.
 
2008-08-24 01:12:02 AM
puckhead: If you happen to be high on mushrooms, it is actually quite an appropriate response.

Having experience with mushrooms + cops, I can safely say that the really appropriate response is to keep your fool mouth shut.

/kept my fool mouth shut
//lawyer did the rest
//don't EVER talk to cops.
 
2008-08-24 01:33:35 AM
what if you're seeing pink unicorns at the time?
 
2008-08-24 02:11:11 AM
Say what meow?
 
2008-08-24 04:07:27 AM
There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.
 
2008-08-24 04:15:19 AM
WhyteRaven74: There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.

I dunno, at the point you climb out of your SUV and into my window and are all over my ass while you're tripping balls... well, I'm going to have to say something. Call me a buzzkill, fascist, whatever, but this kind of behavior doesn't need to be encouraged. I'm sick of the "oh, it's okay he's being a complete and total ass and making other people miserable, he's tripping" attitude.

Again, this is what babysitters are for, people!
 
2008-08-24 06:49:58 AM
Some day you'll be mine, subby.
 
2008-08-24 07:36:54 AM
Damn all of you for posting Super Trooper references ahead of me.

/shakes fist
 
2008-08-24 07:37:59 AM
Must've been some crazy spider-web fractals in that police car...
 
2008-08-24 07:38:07 AM

"While still holding on to the man, Wollenschlaeger reached for his radio-operated door opener to let out Yo and gave orders to bite the man."


That's pretty cool, I wasn't aware the K9 car door was remote control. I just wonder if Fido got a contact high after the bite.

 
2008-08-24 07:41:42 AM
He's doing it wrong, your supposed to look at trees and nature and stuff for cool colors, patterns and hallucinations, not fight with cops.
 
2008-08-24 07:41:52 AM
I'm high on mushrooms, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

/oooooh, a sparkley
 
2008-08-24 07:45:41 AM
When I worked at a restaurant, this food runner came to work high on shrooms one day. He went into the kitchen and started rubbing against a cook like a cat and started to purr. He walked up to the owner and called him David Beckham, when a server asked him to grab a Newcastle from the beer fridge, he laughed and said "you want a new asshole?". So we had our delivery driver give him a ride home. Good times.
 
2008-08-24 07:51:48 AM
We're goin' to Mehico!!!
 
2008-08-24 07:55:29 AM
WhyteRaven74: There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.

dude he jumped in to the police car, dumbass got what he had coming.

I have nothing aginst the use, but shoot man try and avoid the police...at least dont jump into thier car
 
2008-08-24 07:59:18 AM
My bad...
 
2008-08-24 07:59:53 AM
rofl.wheresthebeef.co.uk

/what's the name of...?
 
2008-08-24 08:09:05 AM
This is why you don't trip alone. You need to find a nice secluded place faaaar away from any kind of authority.

/kid had it coming for being stupid
//n00b
 
2008-08-24 08:09:25 AM
mrapier: When I worked at a restaurant, this food runner came to work high on shrooms one day. He went into the kitchen and started rubbing against a cook like a cat and started to purr. He walked up to the owner and called him David Beckham, when a server asked him to grab a Newcastle from the beer fridge, he laughed and said "you want a new asshole?". So we had our delivery driver give him a ride home. Good times.

I worked at a pizza delivery place while I was in college back in the early 90's. One of the manager's friends lived on a farm and he'd come in with a trash bag full of 'shrooms. The manager and his friend would make several mushroom pizzas for themselves to eat later or to take to raves.
 
2008-08-24 08:30:30 AM
Your police dog wants steak with mushrooms.
 
2008-08-24 09:00:09 AM
puckhead: If you happen to be high on mushrooms, it is actually quite an appropriate response.

this is a true statement. my hands look sooo coool right now...
 
2008-08-24 09:04:33 AM
Did you ever notice how silly the word "lunging" looks? I mean, it looks like you're doing something with your lungs. lunging lunging lunging lunging *giggling uncontrollably*
 
2008-08-24 09:12:16 AM
FTA: The man lunged across walked toward Wollenschlaeger, who unfastened his seat belt, opened his driver's side door and pinned the man down.

FTFY, mister officer.
 
2008-08-24 09:15:12 AM
i've seen some crazy things on 'shrooms, done some crazy things. but never had i had the urge to: 1. drive a car 2. lunge through a cop's window.
of course since he stopped his car to walk i guess he didn't have much of a urge either.
 
2008-08-24 09:27:01 AM
WhyteRaven74: There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.

Look, I don't mind if guys go around tripping their balls off, but if the dude is going to start gripping up on people, he really gets what's coming to him. I think the cop actually showed some restraint by not macing/tasing his ass. (the interfering with a police animal charge is pretty shiatty, though).
 
2008-08-24 09:46:55 AM
whereintheworldisevan.com

Agreed. This guy is a total n00b.

I got so high on shrooms one time I saw PLAID! For about an hour or two I was unable to speak.

Got up the next day and tracked down more of those awesome farking shrooms !!
 
2008-08-24 10:35:17 AM
Ontario Provincial Police cars used to be a bright yellow (was great- easy to spot a cop when you needed one, even at speed traps which is probably why they changed them to boring white with some stripes). Buddy of mine was high as hell and had just tossed aside the last of his doob when the cop called him over and asked him some questions.

It took all he had not to ask why the cop why he was riding in a banana.

/Also, I do not reccommend burritos while on shrooms.
 
2008-08-24 10:36:02 AM
WhyteRaven74: There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.

Yes, cops were so much better back in the day. I knew an old retired small-town sheriff that use to let drunks drivers sleep it off on his porch or drop them off at home, but if someone did this to him, that'd be a beat down.
 
2008-08-24 10:38:24 AM
Kongressman Grandma: He's doing it wrong, your supposed to look at trees and nature and stuff for cool colors, patterns and hallucinations, not fight with cops.

The part about not fighting with cops is good advice for nearly all activities.
 
2008-08-24 10:41:40 AM
Everyone who has come into to say this is what trip sitters are for is 100% spot on. No matter how familiar you think you are with a substance, mushrooms and acid have an incredible ability to warp your perceptions to the point where you think you are behaving in a reasonable manner, but you are really waaaaaaaay off base.

Driving is stupid as fark too, so this dude deserves whatever punishment he gets. I've been around cops on 4+ grams of psilocybin and managed to get through it by pretty much just not saying a thing, and being careful about how long I stared at things.
 
2008-08-24 10:41:41 AM
See, this is what happens when cops don't use a little pre-emptive taserin'.
 
2008-08-24 10:55:40 AM
"Adams suffered dog bites to his legs and minor scrapes to his face and was taken to Santiam Memorial Hospital in Stayton, Myers said. Adams then was booked into the Marion County jail."
Sounds like an abolutely perfect trip. Who hasn't pounced an officer with a farking canine when doing shrooms?

/the tit deserved what he got. Surprized he wasn't tazered for good measure.
 
2008-08-24 11:00:46 AM
farm3.static.flickr.com

I think we all know the answer now.

\I laughed so hard after he branded the whores
 
2008-08-24 11:02:20 AM
jfarkinB: Did you ever notice how silly the word "lunging" looks? I mean, it looks like you're doing something with your lungs. lunging lunging lunging lunging *giggling uncontrollably*

Spatula!

Spatula Spatula Spatula Spatula Spatula!
 
2008-08-24 11:08:40 AM
www.dontknockmysmock.com
www.dontknockmysmock.com
 
2008-08-24 11:14:22 AM
I was on some liquid one night at a Phish concert. We were watching two cops pen lighting some kids eyes down below us. My one friend says " Look at those ass**les giving that kid a hard time, YOU should do something about it" I'm tripping balls so I start climbing the railing to do a super-fly snooka 20' down on to these unsuspecting officers when just in time a different and "Better" friend grabbed me and said "what the fark do you think your about to do? Sit the hell down"

so ya hallucinogenics and cops are never a good mix. Five or six really, really good friends and a nice nature setting is by far the safest bet.
 
2008-08-24 11:19:54 AM
How did the cop's AR-15 get jammed?
This account just reads like another asshole policeman
 
2008-08-24 11:47:50 AM
Let he who has not done this before cast the first stone!
 
2008-08-24 11:50:15 AM
The snozzberries taste like snozzberries!
 
2008-08-24 12:21:16 PM
I completely disagree.
 
2008-08-24 12:43:24 PM
Sometimes honesty is the second best policy.
 
2008-08-24 12:50:01 PM
"It's a little bit of like, wow, I was just trying to help someone and check if they were OK, and 'boom,'" (Senior Deputy Jerry Wollenschlaeger) said.
 
2008-08-24 01:01:50 PM
People like this ruin it for the rest of us.
Penis.
 
2008-08-24 01:03:47 PM
MNguy: How did the cop's AR-15 get jammed?
This account just reads like another asshole policeman


WhyteRaven74: There was a time when a good many cops would've let the man go and made nothing of it. Sadly, that's not much the case now. Needs to go back to how it was.

Wow, really sucky trolls on the weekends. I mean, really, they're not even trying.
 
2008-08-24 01:08:52 PM
"I love you."
/NPH
 
2008-08-24 01:50:01 PM
I LOVE NPH as well.. came here for him.. and leaving very satisfied.
 
2008-08-24 02:23:05 PM
the kid is a retard, plenty of us can say we tripped on mushrooms without farking with the police. I'm also shocked the cop didn't taze him...
 
2008-08-24 03:26:13 PM
Yep, that's my girl. She was so excited to post it when she saw it in the paper. Sorry, Control_this, though it may be someday, today she's still mine. If I watch my attitude, that is.
 
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