one could easily convince her that he had two penii.

"Penii"? Such word doesn't exist... It's "penises" you dumbass. Go back to school ya bum!

When will people learn? Women are just meat for reproducing! Personality means nothing!

Too young, interests are too generic, and she is another of the scores of girls I know who is all set to be a school teacher.

I'm sure she's nice, but I know I sound like an ass when I say 'She's like every single girl in high school right now.'

She looks okay, you people are extremely critical of her schnozz. I'm sure you're all models...

"Autopsybeverage
And they think that Avril chick is deep.

Not to sound like an old fart, but who the hell is Avril?
"
Avril Lavigne, aka Biatch to retail workers.
Avril thinks she's trendy by: wearing a tie in their music video for whatever her first single was... and then: doing a video of going to the mall and just being dumbasses...

Oh, yeah, to answer the title: No, I would not, I have someone already, plus I hate Incubus and 'trendy' bands...

"Penii"? Such word doesn't exist... It's "penises" you dumbass. Go back to school ya bum!

As you wish, Azz. I hereby declare you the Authority on Penises. Your penis knowledge amazes me...

Her choice in movies shows she has never seen a good movie once in her life. I mean, it's one thing to say "Dude" is a good movie, but to say it's the best movie you've ever seen...then either you've got bad taste, or you just don't watch anything that was made before you entered high school. yeah, that's a 'no'

Why does she have her hair pulled back like that? It's not like you want an unobstructed view of her face.

She'd hit it.

a/s/l???//

http://www.theedge1039.com/avril.shtml

for those in need of info about Avril

Well she's got it ok with the ice cream, but 17 year old biatches change like undergarments. Don't date anyone under 32.

Isn't Cedar Cliff near Harrisburg, which is near Three Mile Island? Just a thought.

Well, Jessica, the question is - would you date ME? I'm a bit old for you - 31. I'm starting to go around the middle - but I do have a great chest rug! Anyway, what's your background - your folks rich? You can watch "Dude, Where's my Car?" so long as I get to watch my "Anal Avengers" series. Anyway, I like to give people lots of encouragement - usually from my couch in the corner. I worry that I've got too set in my bachelor ways, but, unless you're rich, I don't think I'll change much. You may not be the sexiest chick on the block, but don't worry - you're "doable" girl. So don't even worry about it. That's gotta count for something, huh? Anyway - I'd love to show you my tattoos. My new one is coming together real nice. I'm paying for it in instalments and get a bit more done each month - it's gonna match the mural on the side of my van! Dope! Anyway, if you're into the whole gold chains and chest hair thing, give me a call!

Fess up. Who is the sad loser who posted this thread - and why?

What a bunch of sick weirdos.

NitneLiun. Yes, Cedar Cliff is just a few miles NW of TMI. Coincidently, Red Land H.S. (which I had the misfortune to attend for a couple of years), the other high School in the West Shore School District, is directly west of TMI. You could see the cooling towers from any of the east facing 2nd story classrooms.

Dude, Where's My Car? Incubus?

She doesn't need a date, she needs to be euthanized.

JJ_UK, I will claim the responsibility of being that sick loser. (btw, you got me down pretty well)

Also interesting to see that there are farkers from the area.

Thanks for the info, Shiromori. Come to think of it, I remember seeing her "skating" video. If she was really hardcore, she would've fallen a few times. Tried something hard. Lost a few teeth.

But you have to be pretty to sing into a synth that makes your squawking remotely listenable, don't you?

/recording industry angst

If these two aren't related, I'll eat my hat.

I have answers!

1. Who posted this thread? A friend of mine, who may or may not confess to it.

2. Why? This was in our School's "Cliff Sentinal" which is our newsletter that we get in the mail. THIS is the sort of crap we get in our newsletter, and he wanted to show how revolting that was.

3. Probably just a bad picture: This is true, but I still don't find her attractive

4. Why havn't I seen this on CNN? (referring to the lockers) The local newspaper tends not to write articles about Cedar Cliff High School (or Red Land, for that matter), because the school board has been less than honest with news writers in the past. Newspapers hate the West Shore School District

5. And as to identifying the girls in the volley ball picture, which one? I know most of them.

6. To Central PA Farkers: Cedar Cliff Sucks, and I admit it. That's why I date CV girls.

I will be willing to field any more questions regarding this thread.

In all honesty she isn't bad looking at all. Hey, except for the ex-cheerleaders and starting quarterbacks, everyone at 17 looked awkward (I know I did). I'd give it three years and she'll be pretty good looking - enough for all of you to actually want to do her. Heh I'd wait 'till she's legal for this state though.

Ok now seriously who the fark posted this damn thread?

5 words: "Dude looks like a lady"

Wyldfire and anyone else who may see this, just for the record... Age thing aside I would date this girl.

Hmmm...her lopsided grin and squinty eyes seem to indicate that she's non-judgemental. Which is a plus, in my book. Women like this are the most fun in bed, doncha know. Not them glamour girls who aren't willing to even look at you...those tarts!...uhhh...sorry...got to take my medication...

But I think she's cute enough

I'll take the girl in the tight blue shirt above!! Yes please ma'am! I WILL take a slice of the wholesome goodness!

running with blankoboy's idea...

What the hell. Why the fark not?

fark, maybe at the prom we can all dump pig's blood on her too.

Well now at least we know how revolting the "Cliff Sentinel" is. Ah yes, finally there is vindication and social justice against all that is revolting in the Cliff bloody buttfarking sentinel. Yeah, and bullsh!t aside, I'm sure that posting this article to fark where you knew she would get ripped apart by hyenas was done with absolutely no meanspiritedness whatsoever?

The most depressing thing here: It all took place in PA.

Heh...

I admire your honesty, Artem.

How much Kleenex have you used up since posting this?

Probably just enough to wipe Barnes' spunk off his chin...

No way in hell!!!!

JJ_UK, its really hard to keep track, with the easy availability of internet porn and all. Who's counting, anyway?

JJ_UK: Dunno about that. For all we know this is another layer of anonymity. Barnes would have to be a complete moron to put his own picture up, and if you go to the site that hosts the pic, it's the only file accessible that I've found. Also, why isn't it labelled "me?" Something seems wrong...

Anyway, for any friends of Jessica that see this and know who did it, I refer you to the pranks thread. Enjoy!

I seriously doubt anyone would mess with us over this whole deal. Most people either don't care about artem, or think he's hilarious. On that note, nobody really cares what I do, either. It works out pretty well that way. The only people I can see messing with us is the school board, but what can they honestly do?

I would like to see what she does if she ever read any of this.

Perhaps Barnes and Artemis will give us a follow-up.

I prefer to date people whose IQ outranks their age..

she'd have to have one hell of a personality.

wouldn't even hit it with drew's dick...

"Artem
JJ_UK, I will claim the responsibility of being that sick loser. (btw, you got me down pretty well)"

ya, as someone who knows artem, he is a prety sick bastard (his obsession w/ gay porn and sodomy doesnt help his case either)

just thought you all should know