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(Chicago Sun-Times)   "The last thing this movie needs is a Jabba the Hutt sex scene." Gotta love when Roger Ebert pans a movie   (rogerebert.suntimes.com) divider line 79
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8129 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 15 Aug 2008 at 7:42 AM (5 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-08-15 04:45:17 AM
Anybody who wasn't fully aware that this movie wasn't going to reach ultimate suckitude was delusional, an idiot, or didn't know what Star Wars was in the first place.

I hope this marks the end of the days when slapping "Star Wars" on something makes it sellable.

End, all things must. Time of Star Wars, ended has.

I praise Lucas for all his innovations to the industry, and for the first trilogy. But it's gone. You handled your universe like a Hillary Clinton campaign. There's bigger and better now. Pack up, go home, and leave the taste in our mouths as it is before it gets any worse.
 
2008-08-15 04:53:13 AM
The last thing I need to see is a Roger Ebert sex scene.
 
2008-08-15 05:50:29 AM
Nuke it from orbit. This is one hellaciously bad cartoon. Lucas went from a child-like vision in Episode IV to a child's attempt at a movie in this one.

Stop it George, just stop it.
 
2008-08-15 06:05:47 AM
18% at Rotten Tomatoes. Looks like Lucas did his best to make the prequels look good in comparison.
 
2008-08-15 06:12:31 AM
Oh it looks absolutely horrible. I have zero interest in seeing it.
 
2008-08-15 06:55:18 AM
When I first saw the trailers for it I thought it was a video game. When I realized it was a movie I just shook my head.
 
2008-08-15 07:25:55 AM
Av8rLuvr: When I first saw the trailers for it I thought it was a video game. When I realized it was a movie I just shook my head.

Same here.
 
2008-08-15 07:51:43 AM
Av8rLuvr: When I first saw the trailers for it I thought it was a video game. When I realized it was a movie I just shook my head.

I didn't think it was a video game because most video games these days have much better graphics.
 
2008-08-15 07:58:59 AM
I read an article that said Lucas picked this type of animation because it reminded him of his childhood. Which is stupid. His age isn't his audience. If anything it should have been the animation style of the 70s. Either way, this animation look was a poor choice.
 
2008-08-15 08:03:24 AM
Spanky_McFarksalot: If anything it should have been the animation style of the 70s. Either way, this animation look was a poor choice.

You mean weird and trippy?
 
2008-08-15 08:04:32 AM
Reading that review made me realize that I hate everything outside of the original trilogy.
 
2008-08-15 08:05:17 AM
Sorry, I forgot "My lawn, get off it you will."
 
2008-08-15 08:06:50 AM
It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation. Warner Brothers wanted to show the first few episodes on the big screen. It's not going to be Pixar or even Dreamworks quality. If Warner wanted the movie to have photo-realistic Beowulf characters for the movie and then have these lack-luster versions for the show, that wouldn't make any sense. No one can afford Beowulf characters on a Saturday morning budget.

I know I shouldn't defend the movie until I've seen it tonight, but I'd rather be defending it without seeing it than attacking it.
 
2008-08-15 08:14:06 AM
doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation. Warner Brothers wanted to show the first few episodes on the big screen. It's not going to be Pixar or even Dreamworks quality. If Warner wanted the movie to have photo-realistic Beowulf characters for the movie and then have these lack-luster versions for the show, that wouldn't make any sense. No one can afford Beowulf characters on a Saturday morning budget.

I know I shouldn't defend the movie until I've seen it tonight, but I'd rather be defending it without seeing it than attacking it.


Too bad the cartoon on Cartoon Network cost a fraction of the cost and was about 1,000% better.
 
2008-08-15 08:16:10 AM
doubleofive: know I shouldn't defend the movie until I've seen it tonight,

So sad
 
2008-08-15 08:17:19 AM
Nemo's Brother: doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation. Warner Brothers wanted to show the first few episodes on the big screen. It's not going to be Pixar or even Dreamworks quality. If Warner wanted the movie to have photo-realistic Beowulf characters for the movie and then have these lack-luster versions for the show, that wouldn't make any sense. No one can afford Beowulf characters on a Saturday morning budget.

I know I shouldn't defend the movie until I've seen it tonight, but I'd rather be defending it without seeing it than attacking it.

Too bad the cartoon on Cartoon Network cost a fraction of the cost and was about 1,000% better.


True, but the micro-series was 3 minutes long an episode and 2D with a palette of maybe 6 colors an episode. Of course its going to be cheap. Yes, it was very good, but parts of it (Yoda, I believe it was, smashing two capital ships together with the Force; Mace jumping on a droid starfighter and riding it like a jockey), were pretty over the top.
 
2008-08-15 08:18:29 AM
MugzyBrown: doubleofive: know I shouldn't defend the movie until I've seen it tonight,

So sad


That's not what I meant. I will not defend the movie unless it deserves defending.
 
2008-08-15 08:19:01 AM
Nemo's Brother: Too bad the cartoon on Cartoon Network cost a fraction of the cost and was about 1,000% better.

I came here to say this. The CN one wasn't stellar, but it was definatly solid, and when watched as one piece, I'd say very enjoyabe.

This new one looks like some one filled a bunch of bags with crap, then put those bags into a lrger bag, ate that bag, crapped it out, and put it all into a new bag again.
 
2008-08-15 08:21:10 AM
What, did it hurt Lucas' ego too much to have Tartakovsky involved in this one?
 
2008-08-15 08:25:07 AM
Spanky_McFarksalot: I read an article that said Lucas picked this type of animation because it reminded him of his childhood. Which is stupid. His age isn't his audience. If anything it should have been the animation style of the 70s. Either way, this animation look was a poor choice.

They had crappy CGI in the 1950s?
 
2008-08-15 08:29:31 AM
Sgt Otter: They had crappy CGI in the 1950s?

Well, they had crappy animation, it was just done by hand...
 
2008-08-15 08:39:28 AM
rogerebert.suntimes.com

and you should feel bad. All of you at Lucas Film should. You took a no brainer franchise and made it a reviled garbage dump for the feculant diapers of your children's children.
 
2008-08-15 08:40:45 AM
doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation

Pick one. Either it's a big screen movie lead in for a Saturday morning cartoon, or it's a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the former- it should be of movie quality. If it's the latter, it shouldn't be on the big screen.

You're defending it on the grounds of, "Well, it's supposed to be a sucky movie."

tbn0.google.com "Moichandising, moichandising, moichandising!"
 
2008-08-15 08:46:55 AM
t3knomanser: doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation

Pick one. Either it's a big screen movie lead in for a Saturday morning cartoon, or it's a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the former- it should be of movie quality. If it's the latter, it shouldn't be on the big screen.

You're defending it on the grounds of, "Well, it's supposed to be a sucky movie."

"Moichandising, moichandising, moichandising!"


I think that it should have never been on the big screen. Yeah, it brought about awareness of the show, but did they honestly think the only way we'd know about a show is if there was a movie in theaters leading into it? I'm saying that you should take it as it is; the pilot that should have been a television special.

I'm giving it a chance because its Star Wars, but I won't automatically like it because it is.
 
2008-08-15 08:51:22 AM
doubleofive: t3knomanser: doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation

Pick one. Either it's a big screen movie lead in for a Saturday morning cartoon, or it's a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the former- it should be of movie quality. If it's the latter, it shouldn't be on the big screen.

You're defending it on the grounds of, "Well, it's supposed to be a sucky movie."

"Moichandising, moichandising, moichandising!"

I think that it should have never been on the big screen. Yeah, it brought about awareness of the show, but did they honestly think the only way we'd know about a show is if there was a movie in theaters leading into it? I'm saying that you should take it as it is; the pilot that should have been a television special.

I'm giving it a chance because its Star Wars, but I won't automatically like it because it is.


I bet you liked 'Ewoks', didn't you?
 
2008-08-15 08:52:10 AM
xria: doubleofive: t3knomanser: doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation

Pick one. Either it's a big screen movie lead in for a Saturday morning cartoon, or it's a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the former- it should be of movie quality. If it's the latter, it shouldn't be on the big screen.

You're defending it on the grounds of, "Well, it's supposed to be a sucky movie."

"Moichandising, moichandising, moichandising!"

I think that it should have never been on the big screen. Yeah, it brought about awareness of the show, but did they honestly think the only way we'd know about a show is if there was a movie in theaters leading into it? I'm saying that you should take it as it is; the pilot that should have been a television special.

I'm giving it a chance because its Star Wars, but I won't automatically like it because it is.

I bet you liked 'Ewoks', didn't you?


I gave the TV movies a chance, but I got physically ill about 10 minutes into the first one.
 
2008-08-15 09:03:33 AM
doubleofive: I'm giving it a chance because its Star Wars, but I won't automatically like it because it is.

See, I was never that big on Star Wars. So after the new trilogy, they're out of chances. I assume it's crap until proven otherwise. Based on the reviews coming out so far for Clone Wars, it looks like I'm right.
 
2008-08-15 09:10:03 AM
t3knomanser: doubleofive: It is going to be a Saturday morning cartoon, so they are going to cut corners on animation

Pick one. Either it's a big screen movie lead in for a Saturday morning cartoon, or it's a Saturday morning cartoon. If it's the former- it should be of movie quality. If it's the latter, it shouldn't be on the big screen.

You're defending it on the grounds of, "Well, it's supposed to be a sucky movie."

"Moichandising, moichandising, moichandising!"



It didn't sound like he was defending it at all...
 
2008-08-15 09:13:23 AM
there hasn't been a good star wars story since 1981. actually, that's not true - both knights of the old republic video games were better written, better acted and overall better realized than anything lucas has ever touched.

george, if you're reading this, you created a wonderful, imaginative sci-fi universe. congratulations. now let other people - people who can actually tell a story and write dialog - take it from here. kthxbai.
 
2008-08-15 09:13:50 AM
i2.photobucket.com
 
2008-08-15 09:22:49 AM
I thought the older cartoon miniseries on cartoon network was neat.

Then again it /was/ just samurai jack with a lightsabre....
 
2008-08-15 09:24:43 AM
I HATE GEORGE LUCAS AND ALL HIS MOVIES HES RUINED MY LIFE BUT IM SEEING THIS AFTER WORK TODAY ANYWAY SO I CAN MORE ELOQUENTLY biatch ABOUT IT!!!!1
 
2008-08-15 09:28:31 AM
Cue the basement dwelling fan bois....
 
2008-08-15 09:34:10 AM
FlashHarry: there hasn't been a good star wars story since 1981. actually, that's not true - both knights of the old republic video games were better written, better acted and overall better realized than anything lucas has ever touched.

george, if you're reading this, you created a wonderful, imaginative sci-fi universe. congratulations. now let other people - people who can actually tell a story and write dialog - take it from here. kthxbai.


Ya. I haven't really followed the stuff for 10 years, but I remember reading quite a few decent Star Wars books back in middle/high school. He created a great universe, sort of like Tolkein with Middle Earth. Except Tolkein was a good writer, and Lucas is not.
 
2008-08-15 09:38:27 AM
If anybody is thinking of seeing this crap and hasn't seen Genndy Tartakovsky's animated Clone Wars from 2003 get it right away.
 
2008-08-15 09:45:32 AM
Yes, yeeees George Lucas, seal your fate as a money grubbing whore. Make everybody hate you as the prophecy indicated you would.

weblogs.newsday.com
 
2008-08-15 09:47:28 AM
Practical_Draconian: The last thing I need to see is a Roger Ebert sex scene.

Not a fan of "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls"?

/yeah, yeah, I knew what you actually meant
 
2008-08-15 09:49:04 AM
If George Lucas had died an a James Dean-style accident sometime in the 80s, then we'd all be remembering him as a genius filmmaker, not the cartoon producer he has become. It's a little like that line in the new Batman flick: "You either die a hero or live long enough to become the villain" or something like that. Same thing with Michael Jackson (who I predent died sometime after Smooth Criminal). Tragic.
 
2008-08-15 09:51:32 AM
Spanky_McFarksalot: I read an article that said Lucas picked this type of animation because it reminded him of his childhood. Which is stupid. His age isn't his audience. If anything it should have been the animation style of the 70s. Either way, this animation look was a poor choice.

They should have used the animators from The Yellow Submarine.

Seriously, how much money is enough George? His ex wife, Marcia, decribed Star Wars as a pea under an inverted traingle that is ILM/Skywalker Ranch. If the pea dries up then everything falls.
 
2008-08-15 09:55:59 AM
Read that headline as "Butts sex scene", began have my doubts about the direction of Star Wars. I've re-read the headline yet the doubts remain.
 
2008-08-15 09:57:22 AM
It's still better than the Star Trek Animated Series!
 
2008-08-15 09:59:08 AM
This movie looks so bad, and is such a non-issue, non-event, that I can't believe that it is being discussed in the media.

I wish everyone would completely ignore this hack who is George Lucas, so he would go away.

As has been stated before, he took away all of the good Star Wars and Indiana Jones memories from my childhood.
 
2008-08-15 10:01:45 AM
I thought about seeing this movie. But 21% on rottentomatoes? Jesus, when was the last time an animated movie scored that badly? Given that its source material is something special and that each of the prequels scored over 60%, that tells me that I'll probably hate everything star wars if I see this.
 
2008-08-15 10:01:51 AM
doubleofive:
I'd rather be defending it without seeing it than attacking it.


The Fanboy Mantra.

Me, I'm perfectly capable of thinking "The last three sucked, the previews suck, and the reviews say it sucks... there's a fairly good chance it sucks."
 
2008-08-15 10:04:36 AM
gonna take the kids to it this weekend. I'll let them review it for you on Monday
 
2008-08-15 10:13:08 AM
Corpus Delecti: doubleofive:
I'd rather be defending it without seeing it than attacking it.

The Fanboy Mantra.

Me, I'm perfectly capable of thinking "The last three sucked, the previews suck, and the reviews say it sucks... there's a fairly good chance it sucks."


I'm perfectly capable of thinking that its a kid's Saturday morning cartoon on the big screen. It's not meant for me, but for my little brothers.
 
2008-08-15 10:15:53 AM
*YAWN*

Wake me when they re-animate Leigh Brackett to team up with Lawrence Kasdan to rework some more of George's boring concepts and bad dialogue.

/yeah, I said "re-animate".
//Get it?
///Neither does George.
 
2008-08-15 10:16:48 AM
img374.imageshack.us

/old contest entry
 
2008-08-15 10:19:25 AM
The only way to redeem this series is to let someone else direct the Timothy Zahn trilogy. Sure, let his company do the effects, but keep him the hell away from the script.
 
2008-08-15 10:24:46 AM
Fark Star Wars. Not only has it sucked since RotJ, it's been heading downhill more rapidly with each new release.
 
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