An empty box is a good box.

Step 1: Cut hole in the box.

thalassatx: Snake?

SNAKE!1111!one!

thalassatx: Snake?

Thread over.

thalassatx: Snake?

You're living in the past, man. He uses a metal drum now.

was this the Jello box guy?

great headline subby +1 and yes, i did lmao.

FiestyIrishVixen: was this the Jello box guy?

Yeah. His name was Pete. This is his brother Repeat.

Are the employees still laughing today, or just yesterday, when the story originally ran?

Im at the point I hope some one commits a regular crime.

I wish I was there when he decided on an empty box instead of say... ANY THING ELSE!!!

ukiah: Pete

RTFA, this is cheesecake box guy. C'mon, man. He needed money for more cheesecake!

I think he forgot to bring the cake.

I love box

DeadZone: Step 1: Cut hole in the box.

Step 3 is "Profit"?

Play-doh
Jello
now empty box yo

WV trifecta in play?

Snake was my first thought too! Nice work Boobieser.

Give me your money
In this box, high explosive
No? I must go now

/he inspired me

Cagey B: thalassatx: Snake?

You're living in the past, man. He uses a metal drum now.


begs to differ

The cheesecake is a lie!

Robbers line of thinking:

Things to bring to robbery:

1. Mask
2. Weapon
3. Something to hold money

Things brought to robbery:

1. Empty box

Odds of success: 100%
Results: Profit

Damn cheesecake goes directly to your arteries and kills you.

Step 2: Put your junk in the box.

Cigarettes where involved!

I really think these kinds of criminals should just be let go. They're clearly too retarded to be dangerous.

Empty box robbery trifecta now in play?

JonnyBGoode: Empty box robbery trifecta now in play?

This is a diffrent telling of the same story not a trifecta.
it was a Jell-o cheesecake pudding box. Same story was posted yesterday from a different news site.

Since he said the box was a bomb I wonder if he'll get a weapons charge for it?

I came for the dick-in-a=box references, and left sated.

It's not wise to make fun of Lord Kilderkin.

baka-san: when empty box ownership becomes criminalized only criminals will have empty boxes.

You'll get my empty box when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.

Step 3: Give her the box in marriage. Place in cold storage.

JonnyBGoode: Empty box robbery trifecta now in play?

I thought it sounded familiar, but I read jello yesterday and cheesecake today so I thought it was different.

Boxes are confining.
Especially so in this case.

Fear the box.

What if there WAS a bomb in the box? Then what? He'd be dead that's what. You gonna risk your life over a minimum wage job, boy?

They were lucky this time. Until the box is opened, no one knows for sure if the Schrodinger's Bandit is armed.

See I'm wise enough to know when a gift needs givin'

good thing the box was not loaded; otherwise, the charges would have been more severe.

/"He's being held at South Central Regional Jail and doesn't yet have an attorney." New trend in internet news articles about crimes: mentioning whether the person arrested has an attorney or not. Did they just start doing this, or have I been filtering it out all these years? Because, really, who cares, unless you're the accused or a criminal defense lawyer scanning the internet for new clients.

tabula_rasta: New trend in internet news articles about crimes: mentioning whether the person arrested has an attorney or not. Did they just start doing this, or have I been filtering it out all these years? Because, really, who cares, unless you're the accused or a criminal defense lawyer scanning the internet for new clients.

Are you farking kidding me? People accused of crimes have a right to an attorney. It's easier to violate that right if the press doesn't say one way or the other. Free press is about the only thing capable of holding a government accountable.

Let me be more direct: I care.

Fuggin Bizzy: Are you farking kidding me? People accused of crimes have a right to an attorney. It's easier to violate that right if the press doesn't say one way or the other. Free press is about the only thing capable of holding a government accountable.

Chill, por favor. I understand that, during these times where the current US administration feels it is legitimate to suspend habeus corpus and the right to an attorney at will, one might be a little edgy. I'll cut you some slack on that. However, interpreting the quote as "the accused man is being held without an attorney to keep the government forces accountable for due process" is a bit of an overreaction, I think.

The original (regional) source www.wvgazette.com did not mention whether or not the accused had an attorney. The Associated Press added it for a reason; the same reason they will add that someone "was unavailable for comment" or "did not return our requests for comment" in an published story where someone is accused of something.

With that in mind, let me rephrase (ahem): Recently, I've been noticing the phrase "he doesn't have an attorney yet" in several online articles. Is this a new way of saying "normally, we'd also present his side of the story, but he's unavailable and there's no legal representative to speak on his behalf?" If not, then obviously my mind has been skipping over and therefore I'm a moran (very possible). If this *is* the new newspeak, I am pointing this out because the phrase is kind of funny. I felt like answering the phrase with "well, *now* would be a pretty good time to get one, what with being arrested and in jail and all"