omegaminus: Hang on, people. A lot of you are nominating songs from the past few years and yes, your choices are genuine garbage through and through, but we have to wait for the rest of the world to sober up and realize just how bad they are before they show up on a list like this. And when that happens, we'll bask in the glow of having been right this whole time about just how bad they are.

My nominations for the year 2020 version of this list:
Hips Don't Lie, Fergalicious (two sad examples of how even a bunch of sounds and words thrown together haphazardly can become popular. I think they got the idea from Family Guy's writers)
Anything by Katy Perry (seriously, she represents everything that's wrong with this decade)
Hollaback Girl

You are bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

nitroglycerine: This list fails since it doesn't include Turn The Page
DIAF, preferrably one out of a lighter so it takes a really long time.


Whatever. Poor Bob. Its so horrible to be in a touring band...boo hoo hooo. If it was so bad why didnt he stay in Detroit and get a job in a car factory. And that sax...it makes my skin crawl every time I hear it. That song is nothing but a testament to how much of a pussy he is. You never heard his detroit peers like MC5 or Iggy whine about how bad it was being a rock star, and at that point Bob was way bigger than those guys.

The Billdozer: The_Sponge: Anything by James Farking Blunt.

If I were President, my first decree would be to put James Blunt in Gitmo.

Who's that comedian who voices over "You're Beautiful?"
Stop Perving on my girlfriend!

Tom_Slick: Hammer 2 Legit also comes to mind.

Hammer had a much, much worse song. According to this (new window), Adams's Groove made it to at least #4, so you can't say this song was horribly obscure. Also, it was the theme song to a major motion picture.

Try and watch the whole video. I dare you. Adam's Groove by Hammer. (new window)

What, no "Hooked on a Feelin'" by David Hasslehoff?

/Oogah chucka oogah oogah!

Do you like pina coladas, or getting caught in the rain?


/just learned the lead to hotel california

tonesskin: Most songs by Pantera, Incubus, Cradle of Filth, Garth Brooks, Tu Pac, The Byrds, NWA, Iron Maiden, and Charlotte Church should also be on that list.

Me Against the World was a good Tupac album. Great lyrics. Albums written in prison usually turn out well.

Tupac's problem was that Death Row always needed a rapper to sell records to chicks. That dubious honor went to Tupac.

"Who let the dogs out" by Baha Men Anslem Douglas Rocks. Trini's rock, fakers suck!

Seriously, if these songs are so bad, why were most of them #1 hits around the world.


Lame article

tonesskin: Also anything by Abba, Roxette, Ace of Base, ACDC, Black Sabbath, The Beatles, The Cars, and Johnny Cash should also be on this list of suckitude.

Is there any music that you actually enjoy?

Another song that belongs in music hell: "Santeria."

I'd like "Achy Breaky Heart" for $200, Alex.

Chuck Wagon: Tom_Slick: Hammer 2 Legit also comes to mind.

Hammer had a much, much worse song. According to this (new window), Adams's Groove made it to at least #4, so you can't say this song was horribly obscure. Also, it was the theme song to a major motion picture.

Try and watch the whole video. I dare you. Adam's Groove by Hammer. (new window)

Still more tolerable than Sigur Ros.

Ebony and Ivory should EASILY have been at least #4!

Chuck Wagon: Tom_Slick: Hammer 2 Legit also comes to mind.

Hammer had a much, much worse song. According to this (new window), Adams's Groove made it to at least #4, so you can't say this song was horribly obscure. Also, it was the theme song to a major motion picture.

Try and watch the whole video. I dare you. Adam's Groove by Hammer. (new window)

Have You Seen Her was an awful cover by Hammer.

Tony Orlando and Dawn - Tie a Yellow Ribbon.

WhyteRaven74: tonesskin: Also anything by Abba, Roxette, Ace of Base, ACDC, Black Sabbath, The Beatles, The Cars, and Johnny Cash should also be on this list of suckitude.

are you deaf?

Yeah no kidding. Roxette? Come on, she at least has got the look.

CrunchyCheetoFingers: Seriously, if these songs are so bad, why were most of them #1 hits around the world.


Lame article

Same reason McDonald's in the number one restaurant in the world.

Ser Kheru: Yakety Sax belongs on the list for being crappy and for being abused. So very very abused.

I'm disappointed no one else added that yet.

I used to have that as my ringtone for a while. It annoyed the shiat out of my coworkers.

Been trying to find the lyrics to that one song by the Peppers that's being played on the radio all the time.

/oh yeah, can't find them because they are made up.
//neng nong ning ning nong nong ning na nong na noooooooo

Should at least get honorable mention.

Triaxis: These are of course below all rap songs.

I was wondering why this comment hadn't shown up yet, usually shows up much earlier.

The Bone: CaptainWahoo: Imagine by John Lennon and the breakupbiatch

What's wrong, you can't get over the fact that John chose Yoko over you?

To be fair, CaptainWahoo is probably a better singer.

I find it funny that each of these 10 worse songs probably made their respective creators more money than the editors of Spinner.com and AOL Radio would make combined over 10 lifetimes.

What is hilarious to me is how many of the songs mentioned so far have been brazillion dollar singles. The same people who bought all the copies of these songs now prattle on about how much the songs suck. Outrageous!

\my ipod is so full of awesome, there is very little chance I will ever hear anything I don't like again.

Gooseycheeks: tonesskin: Also anything by Abba, Roxette, Ace of Base, ACDC, Black Sabbath, The Beatles, The Cars, and Johnny Cash should also be on this list of suckitude.

Is there any music that you actually enjoy?

Sure. But I can't stand sucky songs by bands or groups such as the Jackson 5, Lynrd, Opeth, Therapy?, Swervedriver, Kiss, Eminem, Pink Floyd, Mozart, Wyld Stallions, Finger Eleven, Journey, or the Grateful Dead.

Duhbullo: Since we are talking about hotel california, What the hell is a colita?

My two cents?
The center bud of a marijuana plant is called the cola. It is the most prized bud of the plant. Yummy. Colas are plural. Colitas are little colas. The warm smell of colitas rising up through the air is about where I am headed in 5...4...3...2...

bugenhagen: "Greatest Love of All" should be on that list.

Seconded.

icanhazstapler: Ser Kheru: Yakety Sax belongs on the list for being crappy and for being abused. So very very abused.

I'm disappointed no one else added that yet.

I used to have that as my ringtone for a while. It annoyed the shiat out of my coworkers.

I had Crank Yankers "I got mail yeaaaaaaaaaaa" every time I got a text for the same reason. Was funny when I was on call.

Vangor: If there is one thing we can all agree on, it is country and rap are both terrible. I don't believe I've met a person who enjoyed a song or two from either genre if they listened to other music, you instead find people who have become so brain-damaged that all they listen to is from one of those.

We all should take musical advice from a 17 year old that likes Tool.

Tool - music for guys that can't get laid... from 1992.

So overplayed you say?


This was a triumph
I'm making a note here
HUGE SUCCESS
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction
Aperture Science

we do what we must because we can
for the good of all of us except for the ones who are dead
but there's no sense crying over every mistake
you just keep on trying until you run out of cake
and the science gets done and you make a neat gun
for the people who are still alive

I'm not even angry
I'm being so sincere right now
even though you broke my heart and killed me
and torn into pieces
and threw every piece into a fire
as they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you!
Now these points of data make a wonderful line
and we're out of beta, we're releasing on time
so I'm glad I got burned
Think of all the things we learned for the people that are still alive

go ahead and leave me
I think I prefer to stay inside
maybe you'll find someone else to help you
maybe black mesa
that was a joke, haha, fat chance
anyway this cake is great, it's so delicious and moist
look at me still talking, when there's science to do
when I look out there it makes me glad I'm not you
I've experiments to run, there is research to be done
on the people who are still alive

and believe me I am still alive
I'm doing science and I'm still alive
I feel FANTASTIC and I'm still alive
While you are dying I'll be still alive
and when you're dead I'll be still alive
STILL ALIVE, still alive


Does it count if it's overplayed at my home?

Aren't we forgetting "Tiny Bubbles" by Don Ho?

tonesskin: Gooseycheeks: tonesskin: Also anything by Abba, Roxette, Ace of Base, ACDC, Black Sabbath, The Beatles, The Cars, and Johnny Cash should also be on this list of suckitude.

Is there any music that you actually enjoy?

Sure. But I can't stand sucky songs by bands or groups such as the Jackson 5, Lynrd, Opeth, Therapy?, Swervedriver, Kiss, Eminem, Pink Floyd, Mozart, Wyld Stallions, Finger Eleven, Journey, or the Grateful Dead.

Obvious troll is obviously trolling.

love-m'-beer: Timmy the Tumor: Uh, Breaker One-Nine, this here's the Rubber Duck
You got a copy on me Pig-Pen? C'mon
Uh, yeah 10-4 Pig Pen, fer sure, fer sure
By golly it's clean clear to Flag-Town, C'mon
Uh, yeah, that's a big 10-4 Pig-Pen,
Yeah, we definitely got us the front door good buddy,
Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy
.....[snip].....
We gone
Bye, Bye...


Hey, maybe you got your ass up in the air for no reason, but my Daddy was a trucker in the Seventies and if it weren't for CJ McCall, Red Sovine, and Bobby Bear I would have grown up all alone.

So take your urban hate for the decent folk, and get the f**k out of here.....


/Phantom 309 ftw

Effing love Phantom 309. Every now and then I just feel like listening to some of those classic trucker songs that tell a story. Like all of Red Sovine's tunes.

Whats up man! hey yo whats up!
Yeah whats goin on here.
Sick an tired of five-oh runnin up on the block here.
You know what Im sayin?
Yo snow, they came around here lookin for you the other day.
Word? word! bust it!

Chorus
Informer, you no say daddy me snow me Ill go blame,
A licky boom boom down.
Detective mon said daddy me snow me stab someone down the lane,
A licky boom boom down.
Informer, you no say daddy me snow me Ill go blame,
A licky boom boom down.
Detective mon said daddy me snow me stab someone down the lane,
A licky boom boom down.

Police them come an now they blow down me door,
One him come crawl through, through my window,
So then they put me in the back the car at the station,
From that point on me reach my destination,
When the destination reached, it was the east detention, where them
Whipped down me pants, looked up me bottom, so

Chorus

Bigger they are they think they have more power,
Theyre on the phone me say that on (every) hour,
Me for want to use it once an now me call me lover,
Lover who Ill be callin is the one tammy,
An me love her in me heart down to my belly,
Yes me daddy me snow me I feel cool an deadly,
As the one mc shan an the one daddy snow,
Together we-a loveem as a tor-na-do.

Chorus

Listen for me, you better listen for me now.
Listen for me, you better listen for me now.
When me rockin the microphone me rock it steady,
Yes sir, daddy me snow me are the article done.
But in the in an the out of a dance them they say where you come from,
People them say you come from jamaica,
But me born an raised in the ghetto thats the one I want you to know,
Pure black people mon thats all I mon know.
Yeah me shoes are tear up an me toes used to show,
Where me born in on the one toronto, so

Chorus

Come with a nice young lady. intelligent,
Yes shes gentle an irie.
Everywhere me go, me never left her at all.
Yes, its daddy snow me are the roam dance mon.
Roam between a dancin in a in a nation-a.
You never know say daddy me snow me are the boom shakata.
Me never lay-a down flat in that one cardboard box.
Yes say me daddy me snow me Ill go reachin at the top, so...

Chorus

Why would he?

Me sittin round cool with my dibbie dibbie girl,
Police knock my door,
Lick up my pal,
Rough me up an I cant do a thing
Pick up my line, when my telephone ring.
Take me to the station,
Black up my hands.
Trail me down, cuz Im hangin with the snowman,
What Im gonna do,
Im backed an Im trapped,
Slap me in the face an took all o my gap.
They have no clues an they wanna get warmer,
But shan wont turn informer!

tonesskin

You brought up Britney Spears in this thread. Have you no shame? At long last, sir, have you no shame?

cthu1hu: Do you like pina coladas, or getting caught in the rain?

No.

moothemagiccow: Adjective Bird Whiskey: What's wrong with Hotel California? I mean..don't get me wrong. I'm not a fan or anything, but I see a lot of people who just loathe the song.

I really haven't! What's wrong with it? There are worse Eagles songs.

Like wichee woman.

A man and a train (new window)

Bah. "Run Joey Run" is the worst song of all time.

nitroglycerine: nitroglycerine: This list fails since it doesn't include Turn The Page
DIAF, preferrably one out of a lighter so it takes a really long time.


Whatever. Poor Bob. Its so horrible to be in a touring band...boo hoo hooo. If it was so bad why didnt he stay in Detroit and get a job in a car factory. And that sax...it makes my skin crawl every time I hear it. That song is nothing but a testament to how much of a pussy he is. You never heard his detroit peers like MC5 or Iggy whine about how bad it was being a rock star, and at that point Bob was way bigger than those guys.

You do not talk about Bob Motherfarking Seger and the Silver farking Bullet band in that tone!

Here it is. This cracks me up!

Link (new window)

Mamma said knock you out!