honestly who the fark is Dane Cook? I hear that name mentioned alot but I have no farking idea who it is

bottsicus

Dude, you are going to get SMOKED for that..

Oh no! A bunch of social defects on the internet are going to call me names!

FARK BILL HICKS

bulok: honestly who the fark is Dane Cook? I hear that name mentioned alot but I have no farking idea who it is

Trust me, you're better off that way.

Louis CK, Patton Oswalt, and Lewis Black kick Dane's ass anyday. Dane ripped CK off anyway - and Dane's been telling the exact same jokes for at least five years now. His jokes don't hold up over time. I laughed the first time I heard him, but not since because every new special or CD is always the same shiat.

Oh yeah, when I think comedy, I think MSNBC.

fish500: "DUDE SO LIKE WE WERE AT THE, THE DRIVE-THRU AT KFC, THE DRIVE-THRU AT KFC! AND MY BUDDIES WERE ALL LIKE 'PRRRRRFGGH!' YOU KNOW LIKE 'PRRRRFGH!' SO I'M TRYING TO DRIVE, DRIVE THE CAR! AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU AND MY BUDDIES ARE ALL LIKE 'PRRRFGGH!' LIKE YOU KNOW 'PFFFFRGH!' YOU KNOW AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU AND FINALLY I WAS LIKE 'HEY WHAT THE HELL!' AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU."

"Oh God, I'm so hungry; it's been a while since I've been here, what's good to eat here at the KFC?"

"Well, we've got our mashed potatoes, those are great. Also, our corn is real sweet and crunchy...oh! we've got these little popcorn chicken things now. And uh..oh of course, if you're gonna get the mashed potatoes, you gotta get the gravy, because that is farkin' awesome. And--"

"Ok, stop right there. Is there any way that you can take all those things and pile them into one bowl? Just a big brown hillock of starch that I can just eat with a spoon like I'm a Death Row inmate on suicide watch?"

"Ummm yes, we can do that....or we can arrange them seperately on a plate like you're an adult with dignity and self-respect."

"No, fark it, I don't care anymore. Just a big bowl of food, and if you could get the bowl to play Pink Floyd's "Great Gig In The Sky" while I eat it and stare off into the middle distance from my studio apartment, that'd be great. In fact, if you could take the whole thing, put it in a blender and liquify it, then put it into a caulking gun and inject it into my femoral artery, even better! But until you invent a lunch gun, I want a failure pile in a sadness bowl."

/Patton Oswalt
//First thing that came to mind when I thought of KFC being mentioned by a comedian with actual talent.
///And it's Oswalt, not Oswald. I'm not normally a grammar Nazi, but I've counted like three or four people in a row on here who did this.

So, Dane Cook is buying George Carlins' toilet or something?

He seems unworthy to sit on that, but cash is cash, I guess.

jj325: Just to be sure maybe a steel cage death match between Lewis and Dane Cook. Because Lewis is older we will provide him weapons. And tie Dane to the floor. And cut him a few times. And drug him.

Better yet, a steel cage match between Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia.

Two men enter. No man leaves.

I have a wishlist on my tivo that just records stand up comedy (retains up to 10 recordings).

I saw a Dane Cook special once, watched the first 10 minutes, meh, nothing to write home about. Besides, I had a lewis black special to get to.

If I'm in the mood for "Dane Cook" comedy, I'd much rather listen to Nick Swardson. He is funny as hell.

WaltzingMathilda: What's weird about all of this is that rooms full of people are laughing at Demetri Martin's act. Someone should tell these people he's not funny!

/I hate Dane Cook, fwiw

G-d forbid people actually laugh at what amuses them, and not at what a bunch of 30-something do-nothings on Fark tell them they should laugh at.

I do stand-up comedy here in Gainesville on occasion. Yes, we have a comedy club and, yes, it's attached to a hotel. On Thursdays we do the amateur show which show cases local talent. Because UF is right down the road, most of the "comics" on this night are college dudes and most of the audience is their peers. You really have no idea how popular he is amongst that crowd and how truly unfunny he has become (he started out decent, I will admit) until you see 20 year old copy cats of the guy. Thing is, they suck at aping his act and yet the ladies still eat it up.

Unbelievable
Mad Tv does a better Dane Cook than Dane Cook does

ErikShocker: Doug

I'm surprised that I'm only the second to say Stanhope is very much in the vein of Carlin.

WaltzingMathilda

It's definately number 2 and pretty amazing to see. These guys really aren't writing funny material, but as long as they do it in the 'Dane Style' they get the college crowd rolling on the floor. Actually it's sad. But none of these peoples are going to do stand-up outside of college and are just doing it to get laid, so I wouldn't worry about seeing them on the circuit anytime soon.

These guys (and lady) aren't in the same mold as Carlin (who was overrated for his comedy, but severely underrated for his social commentary) and don't get the same attention as people like Lewis Black or Mitch Hedberg (both of whom I also love), but if you're looking for pure, unadulterated funny, check out:

Jim Gaffigan
Mike Birbiglia
Todd Barry
Brian Regan
Pablo Francisco
Kathleen Madigan

WaltzingMathilda: Grey Street: These guys (and lady) aren't in the same mold as Carlin (who was overrated for his comedy, but severely underrated for his social commentary) and don't get the same attention as people like Lewis Black or Mitch Hedberg (both of whom I also love), but if you're looking for pure, unadulterated funny, check out:

Jim Gaffigan
Mike Birbiglia
Todd Barry
Brian Regan
Pablo Francisco
Kathleen Madigan

Why Pablo? I can see the other guys, but Pablo? Doesn't he do the movie trailer voice for 20 of his 30 minute act? And then various voices of his family members?

You're right, he's kind of the odd man out there. Maybe I just had him on my mind since I heard his Schwarzenegger "Little Tortilla Boy" routine on XM last night, which always kills me. The others are much more similar.

"Oh, no! Oh, HELL no!"

/that is all

jj325: I would say Lewis Black is the closest we have today to a George Carlin.

Agreed. He's not quite as good at social commentary, but he's great at political commentary...and a master at the rant.

That show of his, though...ech.

Proteejay: Wow. This thread is full of troll. And bullsh*t.

Dane Cook sucks a$$. He's an unfunny douche bag and that's all there is to it. His schtick's been done before. And don't bring up Carlos Mencia either.

That is all.

\Rock, Black then Maher.

Way to put us in our place Reallynewfarktoughguy.

Dane Cook: The Pauly Shore of the Internet Generation. Before you rip him apart TOO badly though, remember that he didn't event the "MySpace Celebrity" phenomena. He just profited from it. It's hard to blame the guy for taking advantage of a million NetLemmings who anointed him "King of Comedy" for the exact same reason that they're currently sending hate-mail to critics that give "The Dark Knight" bad reviews.

P.T. Barnum would have had a field day with the MySpace/Twitter/Facebook crowd. Not only is a sucker born every minute, today then band together en masse to assure each other that Tila Tequila is an multi-talented international superstar.

I'm hoping he's the next Carlin, meaning the next comedian to die.

LEWIS BLACK STOPPED BEING FUNNY YEARS AGO

Just like Dane Cook. Except Dane Cook was much funnier in his prime (pre-vicious circle).

Cue the bandwagon haters who have never actually listened to Dane Cook.

absoluteparanoia: LEWIS BLACK STOPPED BEING FUNNY YEARS AGO

Just like Dane Cook. Except Dane Cook was much funnier in his prime (pre-vicious circle).

Wow...two statements that, when they collide, turn into a burst of pure energy...

Oh and Carlin > Louis CK > Demitri Martin > Jon Stewart

Dane Cook sucks donkey balls now. He kept the style and removed the funny from his jokes.

They went from "You know why I don't play Monopoly? 'Cause every game ends up the same way. fark THIS GAME! I quit. You win GRANDPA! And Nana is a cheating WHORE!! Where'd you get those 50's grandma? DON'T TOUCH ME GRANDPA! Don't TOUCH me."

to

"DUDE SO LIKE WE WERE AT THE, THE DRIVE-THRU AT KFC, THE DRIVE-THRU AT KFC! AND MY BUDDIES WERE ALL LIKE 'PRRRRRFGGH!' YOU KNOW LIKE 'PRRRRFGH!' SO I'M TRYING TO DRIVE, DRIVE THE CAR! AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU AND MY BUDDIES ARE ALL LIKE 'PRRRFGGH!' LIKE YOU KNOW 'PFFFFRGH!' YOU KNOW AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU AND FINALLY I WAS LIKE 'HEY WHAT THE HELL!' AT THE KFC DRIVE-THRU."

See, one of them actually has a joke.

IXI Jim IXI: Wow...two statements that, when they collide, turn into a burst of pure energy...

Truth hurts, doesn't it. Lewis Black suffered from the same problem as Dane Cook. He kept the style, took out the jokes.

"REPUBLICANS! DEMOCRATS *shakes uncontrollably* Blah blah blah ANEURYSM!. Thank you and Good night."

absoluteparanoia: Truth hurts, doesn't it. Lewis Black suffered from the same problem as Dane Cook. He kept the style, took out the jokes.

"REPUBLICANS! DEMOCRATS *shakes uncontrollably* Blah blah blah ANEURYSM!. Thank you and Good night."

Except politics are always changing, always a new thing to crack on. Physical comedy only brings you so far, especially when it's ALWAYS the same physical bits.

ARRRGHHHH! GRRRUNNNGH! :throw self on the floor:

IXI Jim IXI: Except politics are always changing, always a new thing to crack on. Physical comedy only brings you so far, especially when it's ALWAYS the same physical bits.

ARRRGHHHH! GRRRUNNNGH! :throw self on the floor:

Then why isn't Lewis Black funny anymore? I saw him live and it was hysterical. I saw him again, and cracked a laugh here and there but that was it. Mostly a few "oh, that's kinda clever" moments. Mostly "geez, he's really reaching" moments.

absoluteparanoia: Then why isn't Lewis Black funny anymore? I saw him live and it was hysterical. I saw him again, and cracked a laugh here and there but that was it. Mostly a few "oh, that's kinda clever" moments. Mostly "geez, he's really reaching" moments.

How far between the appearances? I saw Carlin two times in two years. First time, I was like, "Farking amazing!". Second time, "It would have been farking amazing!...if I hadn't just seen the same show last year".

Black's last special was great. His show is hideous.

IXI Jim IXI: How far between the appearances? I saw Carlin two times in two years. First time, I was like, "Farking amazing!". Second time, "It would have been farking amazing!...if I hadn't just seen the same show last year".

I was a Freshmen in college at the time so the first one was umm 2002 maybe early 2003. The recent special is the one I'm referring to, that was 2007 I believe. Four years to come up with new stuff, and most of it mediocre.

Earguy: Submitter is damn lucky he used the UNLIKELY tag. That's all I'm saying.

I was half tempted to use something else just to watch this thread implode in to a troll haven of awesome... maybe next time ;)

absoluteparanoia: I was a Freshmen in college at the time so the first one was umm 2002 maybe early 2003. The recent special is the one I'm referring to, that was 2007 I believe. Four years to come up with new stuff, and most of it mediocre.

I didn't think the recent special was that bad. At least he's keeping his schtick updated.

BTW, your listing of Jon Stewart in the prior list with Carlin was unfair. Stewart is comedy by committee...he's mostly the frontman.

Grey Street: These guys (and lady) aren't in the same mold as Carlin (who was overrated for his comedy, but severely underrated for his social commentary) and don't get the same attention as people like Lewis Black or Mitch Hedberg (both of whom I also love), but if you're looking for pure, unadulterated funny, check out:

Jim Gaffigan
Mike Birbiglia
Todd Barry
Brian Regan
Pablo Francisco
Kathleen Madigan

Kathleen Madigan!!!! Love her. Saw her live last year and seeing her again this year. She grew up right down the road pretty much so it's cool to see somewhere from here that is actually worthy of their fame (unlike you, Kimora Lee).

shabu: Here here! Eddie Izzard rocks hard as well!

I'm glad he's having success with his show, but it's a damn shame that it's apparently cutting down on his standup.

So Dane is going to start "re-imagining" Carlin's work now?

IXI Jim IXI: I didn't think the recent special was that bad. At least he's keeping his schtick updated.

BTW, your listing of Jon Stewart in the prior list with Carlin was unfair. Stewart is comedy by committee...he's mostly the frontman.

I meant Jon's stand-up. I've seen Jon Stewart's stand up twice. That's all his stuff. (To all those people who think he exclusively does TDS, you're wrong)

absoluteparanoia: I meant Jon's stand-up. I've seen Jon Stewart's stand up twice. That's all his stuff. (To all those people who think he exclusively does TDS, you're wrong)

Ahhh, gotcha. I've never had a chance to catch his stand-up...but I remember how things went during the writer's strike, so I'm not surprised.

Grey Street: These guys (and lady) aren't in the same mold as Carlin (who was overrated for his comedy, but severely underrated for his social commentary) and don't get the same attention as people like Lewis Black or Mitch Hedberg (both of whom I also love), but if you're looking for pure, unadulterated funny, check out:

Jim Gaffigan
Mike Birbiglia
Todd Barry
Brian Regan
Pablo Francisco
Kathleen Madigan

I agree with this list except for Todd Barry, he's a mediocre prick. Saw him at the improv, not only was his opening act better--but people actually called for his opening act to come back on stage he was doing so bad.

Sorry, but it should be Dennis Leary if he goes back to stand up.

IXI Jim IXI: Ahhh, gotcha. I've never had a chance to catch his stand-up...but I remember how things went during the writer's strike, so I'm not surprised

He's really funny live, has a great schtick about Rosh Shashona (sp?) versus Lent "Ours is over in one day of giving things up and you have to give something up for 40 days and 40 nights? Even in fasting you guys are still paying retail! Hell, we don't even have to give it up for the whole day--just when the suns out! People like me usually give up when it gets a little cloudy."

His Vegas show was raunchy, too. Much more so then when he came to my college years later.

absoluteparanoia: His Vegas show was raunchy, too. Much more so then when he came to my college years later.

Hmm...interesting. I'm going to have to check that out. I like how he delivers what his writers give him, but I thought the stuff he did during the strike was awful. Of course, I'd hate to see how many cross-outs he had on the scripts he wrote for the show.

"Damn...can't say THAT on the air..."

DamnYankees: Jimmy Pardo is the funniest comedian currently working as an actual standup, IMO.

So late and so many dollars short, but THIS THIS THIS MOTHERfarkING THIS! Best $20 I ever spent was to get the Never Not Funny Primo podcast....