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(Daily Stab)   Ashton Kutcher's still trying to convince himself that marrying a woman 15 years his senior with three kids and a crazy ex-husband was a good idea   (dailystab.com) divider line 45
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5590 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 May 2008 at 6:10 AM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2008-05-21 06:19:16 AM  
SHUT UP.
 
2008-05-21 06:19:50 AM  
He raises Bruce's kids while Bruce bangs supermodels.
 
2008-05-21 06:22:38 AM  
In a few years when she's more old than hot, they'll divorce and he'll get half her money...so yeah it was a pretty good idea.
 
2008-05-21 06:23:09 AM  
Mama...
 
2008-05-21 06:37:04 AM  
For some reason I see a future where he gets caught banging his step daughter and gets his ass kicked by Bruce. Just a feeling...

AK : "Sometimes the most illogical decisions you make in your life can be the best ones when it comes to love"
 
2008-05-21 07:39:47 AM  
Moray: For some reason I see a future where he gets caught banging his step daughter and gets his ass kicked by Bruce. Just a feeling...

One of his step daughters has said that she used to have a crush on Ashton, including posters on her bedroom wall...until he married Demi.

/creepy
//bet he does bang one of his step daughters eventually
 
2008-05-21 07:51:48 AM  
Well he's getting some, soooooo.....
 
2008-05-21 08:15:05 AM  
But this morning I woke up and finally my logical mind caught up to my heart and I know marrying Demi was the smartest decision I've ever made.

So in Hollywood-speak this means they'll be sperated in about two months?
 
2008-05-21 08:27:00 AM  
Moray: AK : "Sometimes the most illogical decisions you make in your life can be the best ones when it comes to love"

Did he steal that from his wacky Vegas movie?
 
2008-05-21 08:34:04 AM  
I'm glad that both of their careers are in neutral. Hate both of them with a passion.
 
2008-05-21 08:49:44 AM  
I wish someone would put a stop to all the garbage he's producing.
 
2008-05-21 08:57:31 AM  
They were together for a couple years before they got married--it's not like they pulled a Mariah Carey/Nick Cannon thing. Plenty of time to get out of it if they wanted. It's not always about looks. If it is, then that's a different problem.
 
2008-05-21 09:09:40 AM  
Marisyana: It's not always about looks.

Have you seen Demi nekkid? She's still a knockout. Plus all that divorce, half her $$ stuff.
 
2008-05-21 09:13:37 AM  
syrynxx: Have you seen Demi nekkid? She's still a knockout. Plus all that divorce, half her $$ stuff.

You better believe Bruce made her get a pre-nup even if he claims to love Ashton. And looks go both ways--Ashton's a little too pretty for my taste but lots of women think he's hot.
 
2008-05-21 09:27:40 AM  
Marisyana: syrynxx: Have you seen Demi nekkid? She's still a knockout. Plus all that divorce, half her $$ stuff.

You better believe Bruce made her get a pre-nup even if he claims to love Ashton. And looks go both ways--Ashton's a little too pretty for my taste but lots of women think he's hot.


Ashton is too pretty for your tastes...I'd better do this while I can...

How YOU doin'?
 
2008-05-21 09:38:16 AM  
Ed Finnerty
I wish someone would put a stop to all the garbage he's producing.

Oh I get it, you're punk'ing us. Ahhhhhhhh, we've been punk'd. Lolz. Thats crazy.
 
2008-05-21 09:41:44 AM  
Anyone who would marry Kelso deserves nothing but anguish and loss.
 
OMO
2008-05-21 09:58:09 AM  
WearTheFoxHat: bet he does bang one of his step daughters eventually

Unless she grows a penius...doubtful.
 
2008-05-21 10:03:01 AM  
She was hot with a shaved head. I'd say he hit the jackpot.
 
2008-05-21 10:09:46 AM  
WearTheFoxHat: bet he does bang one of his step daughters eventually

I dunno about that...IIRC the stepdaughters got some serious fugly goin' on.
 
2008-05-21 10:18:07 AM  
zappaisfrank: WearTheFoxHat: bet he does bang one of his step daughters eventually

I dunno about that...IIRC the stepdaughters got some serious fugly goin' on.


As long as Bruce draws breath,Ashton will get no chance to bang his kids. And they ain't fugly since they have small parts in some of his movies
 
2008-05-21 10:28:11 AM  
zdamort: He raises Bruce's kids while Bruce bangs supermodels.

Srlsy. Bruce got the better end of that deal.
 
2008-05-21 10:31:26 AM  
Marisyana: syrynxx: Have you seen Demi nekkid? She's still a knockout. Plus all that divorce, half her $$ stuff.

You better believe Bruce made her get a pre-nup even if he claims to love Ashton. And looks go both ways--Ashton's a little too pretty for my taste but lots of women think he's hot.


I think the camera commercials he's doing for Nikon are adorable, and a couple of his pranks were pretty funny, if only for the fact that he was, for the most part, punking celebrities I can't stand.

But I totally agree with the assessment that one day one of the step-daughters will admit to a long-term affair. It's a thought I've had for quite some time.
 
2008-05-21 10:41:14 AM  
zdamort: He raises Bruce's kids while Bruce bangs supermodels.

It makes evolutionary sense. Female cuckoos figured that out a long time ago.
 
2008-05-21 10:49:21 AM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx:

I think the camera commercials he's doing for Nikon are adorable, and a couple of his pranks were pretty funny...


images.jupiterimages.com
 
2008-05-21 10:52:33 AM  
glamourmag.typepad.com

theenvelope.latimes.com
 
2008-05-21 10:53:06 AM  
superoogie: xxBirdMadGirlxx:

I think the camera commercials he's doing for Nikon are adorable, and a couple of his pranks were pretty funny...


Hey, I'm not nominating him for a Nobel Peace Prize or anything. Just saying- even a broken clock is right twice a day.

Law of averages alone says that occasionally even Ashton Kutcher will be amusing, if not piss your pants funny.
 
2008-05-21 10:57:26 AM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx:

Hey, I'm not nominating him for a Nobel Peace Prize or anything. Just saying- even a broken clock is right twice a day.

Law of averages alone says that occasionally even Ashton Kutcher will be amusing, if not piss your pants funny.


Bir-dy loves Ash-ton... Bir-dy loves Ash-ton... Bir-dy loves Ash-ton... Bir-dy loves Ash-ton...
 
2008-05-21 11:13:22 AM  
I dont think marrying Demi Moore is a bad idea...
 
2008-05-21 11:22:34 AM  
Wandarah: I dont think marrybanging Demi Moore is a bad idea...

FTFY.

3 children, 2 divorces. Not to be rude, but not the best equation in my opinion.

/And I think she's totally overrated.
// Not that that has anything to do with it.
 
2008-05-21 11:23:27 AM  
I had the number one show in America, I had the number one show on cable and the number one show on FOX

OK, that can't be right. Especially that last one. I think the Simpsons would like a word with him on that.
 
2008-05-21 11:43:49 AM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx
Wandarah: I dont think marrybanging Demi Moore is a bad idea...

FTFY.

3 children, 2 divorces. Not to be rude, but not the best equation in my opinion.


Who did she marry and divorce besides Willis?
 
2008-05-21 11:47:00 AM  
zappaisfrank: Who did she marry and divorce besides Willis?

Freddie Moore, 1980 to 1985. I had to imdb his name, but I was pretty sure she'd been married before.

Of course, I thought her first husband was Emilio Estevez so...
 
2008-05-21 11:51:20 AM  
Tranny.

glamourmag.typepad.com
 
2008-05-21 12:37:31 PM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx:
zappaisfrank: Who did she marry and divorce besides Willis?

Freddie Moore, 1980 to 1985. I had to imdb his name, but I was pretty sure she'd been married before.

Of course, I thought her first husband was Emilio Estevez so...


Bir-dy love Em-il-io...
 
2008-05-21 12:46:49 PM  
I wouldn't marry someone Demi's age (if I were his age) for the same reason I wouldn't marry a 25 year old woman with a few extra pounds. Older women never get younger and thick girls almost never get thinner.
 
2008-05-21 12:57:29 PM  
superoogie: xxBirdMadGirlxx:
zappaisfrank: Who did she marry and divorce besides Willis?

Freddie Moore, 1980 to 1985. I had to imdb his name, but I was pretty sure she'd been married before.

Of course, I thought her first husband was Emilio Estevez so...

Bir-dy love Em-il-io...


Sweetums, I think you may want to discuss with your doctor upping the dosage.
 
2008-05-21 01:00:24 PM  
Everything below Rumer's neck looks fine to me. But she got that goddamned Willis jawline.
 
2008-05-21 01:09:01 PM  
I have always thought Demi Moore had one of the worst fake boob jobs I've ever seen come out of Hollywood. She looked totally hot in "About Last Night" when she was her natural self. The fakies that appeared around the time of "Striptease" look absolutely freakish.
 
2008-05-21 01:23:35 PM  
Her best roll was in The Master.
 
2008-05-21 01:57:41 PM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx: superoogie:

Bir-dy love Em-il-io...

Sweetums, I think you may want to discuss with your doctor upping the dosage.


No amount of dosage will stop you illicit love for the leaders of the Brat Pack.
 
2008-05-21 03:29:39 PM  
superoogie: No amount of dosage will stop you illicit love for the leaders of the Brat Pack.

Ok, so back when I was like 12 I maybe sorta had a thing for Rob Lowe.

But Emilio Estevez? Ick.

I will admit that except for him the entire cast of Young Guns II was pretty yummy.
 
2008-05-21 04:04:25 PM  
xxBirdMadGirlxx:

Ok, so back when I was like 12 I maybe sorta had a thing for Rob Lowe.

But Emilio Estevez? Ick.

I will admit that except for him the entire cast of Young Guns II was pretty yummy.


It gave you the St. Elmo's fire in your pants, didn't it?
 
2008-05-21 04:57:09 PM  
the snl he hosted was offensive to my person
 
2008-05-21 06:45:08 PM  
hip_replacement: the snl he hosted was is offensive to my person

FTFY
 
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