Ok. Sounds reasonable to me.

Thanks, now I'm going to be travelling with my U-lock in my belt again for a while.

You might yet whoop my ass with an ice scraper but you're not getting out of it without a Krypto in your farking teeth.

Ahhh, yes. The joys of living in a college town.

What's the problem?

Lutz, meanwhile, had his hand under his shirt near his waistband as if he had a gun, the complaint says, and threatened the victim, saying, "I'll (expletive) cap your ass."

Are they sure this isn't some movie I saw late at night?

Damn townies.

What you gonna do when you get out of jail?
I'm gonna have some fun
What do you consider fun?

/whoop some ass apparently.

Sounds like he wanted to go back.

soze: Thanks, now I'm going to be travelling with my U-lock in my belt again for a while.

You might yet whoop my ass with an ice scraper but you're not getting out of it without a Krypto in your farking teeth.

TrentSteel68: What you gonna do when you get out of jail?
I'm gonna have some fun
What do you consider fun?

/whoop some ass apparently.

James Brown! James Brown! James Brown! James Brown!

/fark MC

OMG ITS TEH VIDEO GAMEZ FAULT!!!!111!!!!!11111

Do not collect $200.

subby: Man's reason for attacking bicyclist with ice scraper: "I just got out of jail. I'm trying to get back in"

Tightened T up FY

Would that be the legal equivalent of making a U-turn?

My brother is an avid cyclist. And as a law enforcement officer he always carries a weapon with him. One of these days the little punk ass biatches will come across the wrong person.
/cue internet tough guy pick for me too

You're gonna get raped

All cyclists should be cranberry-slapped. Get off the freakin' road in your weird little pants.

Uh, soze haz teh va-jay-jay Hetfield.

/Even if her internet penor is bigger than mine. . .

Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

scottywotty: Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

Ha, pwned!

We need the death penalty for recurring douchebaggery like this.

I'm not even kidding.

he was just celebrating the release of GTA IV. Cut the brotha' some slack. Unfortunately he is going to lose that ice pick when he posts bail the next day

FTA: Diaz faces charges of ... two counts of bail jumping. Cash bail of $1,200 was set when he appeared in court.

Umm, judge? You're doing it wrong.

scottywotty: I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

Do you shee the beasht? Have you got it in your shights?

some_beer_drinker: scottywotty: Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

haha.

you must look like a loser.

Said the guy stuck in China

Marla Singer's Laundry: some_beer_drinker: scottywotty: Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

haha.

you must look like a loser.

Said the guy stuck in China

That's what I was thinking when I checked out his profile.
I may be a loser, but I aint a loser living in China.

FTFAThere are probably not a lot of places in the world where a man out for a bicycle ride before work in late April would get attacked by a man armed with an ice scraper.

Madison is one such place.

Huh?

scottywotty: Marla Singer's Laundry: some_beer_drinker: scottywotty: Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

haha.

you must look like a loser.

Said the guy stuck in China

That's what I was thinking when I checked out his profile.
I may be a loser, but I aint a loser living in China.

There's just sum ting wong with him

I find a sock full of quarters works best.

Nestea Plunge: I find a sock full of quarters works best.

Doesn't that hurt your penis?

Marla Singer's Laundry: Nestea Plunge: I find a sock full of quarters works best.

Doesn't that hurt your penis?

Not if you do it right.

Critical Bill(whizzing in milk jug)approves

Rehabilitation must not have stuck....

blazemongr: FTA: Diaz faces charges of ... two counts of bail jumping. Cash bail of $1,200 was set when he appeared in court.

Umm, judge? You're doing it wrong.

Exactly what I came to say. The other guys also have much the same issues.

scottywotty: Years ago, when I lived in Va Beach, I was riding my bicycle and I felt something hit my lower back as a car went by. It stung like hell.
I stopped to check it out and I had a dime sized, red welt. I never heard anything but I think they shot me with a BB or pellet gun.

Then quit slowing down traffic with your bike and actually obey traffic lights and street signs you pud.

I tbhink there should be a manadatory concealed carry law for everybody from 13 to 90. Including range training and safety precedures.

"I just want to whoop some ass and have fun assaulting people with sticks and baseball bats and threatening to kill them, with my friends!"

"Ah... " *BLAM*

An armed society is a polite society cuts down on violent asshats. A whole lot of ambulatory dogshiat might reconsider the "fun" factor of violent assault if they knew that everbody from the paperboy to the pensioners was packing heat.

It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum.... and I'm all outta gum.

/what kinda pansy couldn't take a coupla whacks from an ice scraper?
//wouldn't have hurt nearly as much if he had a real pair

LOL

Anders Chydenius says:

Where is Madison? Is it the one in Wisconsin? Why is your location a secret? Are you hiding secret government alien hardware there? Is the Illuminati involved?

PLEASE, local newspaper websites, TELL US WHERE YOU ARE!!!
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Community Comments

Wed. Apr. 30, 2008 7:17 am

DH says:

Anders Chydenius-

Keep in mind the article was intended for the people of Madison (who know where Madison is located) to read. Just because you found it on FARK doesn't mean it was written for FARK - do some research.

Nice beat down there.

Wittenberg Dropout: It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum.... and I'm all outta gum.

/what kinda pansy couldn't take a coupla whacks from an ice scraper?
//wouldn't have hurt nearly as much if he had a real pair

Maybe we need an "Internet Schoolyard Bully" cover. : )

soze: You might yet whoop my ass with an ice scraper ...

Probably not -- idiots like that will only pick on you if you're small, or if they really have you outnumbered, or preferably both.

BobtheFascist: Ahhh, yes. The joys of living in a college town

...near Wisconsin small-town alcoholic rednecks. Being in a college town has nothing to do with it.

Marla Singer's Laundry: We need the death penalty for recurring douchebaggery like this.

I'm not even kidding.

Agreed. These little farkchops don't need prison. They need to be beaten within an inch of their lives to the point where they spend the rest of their days pissing their pants and sucking applesauce through a straw because they cannot chew solid food.

I have farking had it with tough guy criminals.

A lot of habitual offenders get out, can't deal with the outside world, and do the first thing that pops into their head so they can get back in.

They get out, get treated like scum, and either can't find a job or if they do find a job their superior forces them to do horrible crap under threat of calling their PO to a (false) parole violation, and so on... they know they can survive on the inside and get 3 square meals a day.


/Just sayin'

If you want whoop ass, go see Ernie Link (NSFW)

If they wanted whoop azz, they should go see Ernie - Link (NSFW)