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(VillageSoup.com)   Nothing really prepares a man for marriage like being tasered, handcuffed, hog-tied with duct tape, oiled and feathered, and paraded through downtown strapped to a lawn chair on the back of a flatbed truck (with video)   (knox.villagesoup.com ) divider line
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14937 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Apr 2008 at 9:20 AM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



102 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2008-04-11 06:40:46 AM  
That's more than a little disturbing.
 
2008-04-11 08:21:31 AM  
Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."
 
2008-04-11 08:44:04 AM  
Skail: Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."

I wanna party with YOU.
 
2008-04-11 08:51:59 AM  
I call that "three-diamond" service.
 
2008-04-11 09:05:33 AM  
I call fail, it's not a good party unless you come home with a traffic cone/.
 
2008-04-11 09:21:38 AM  
drinking was involved

Indoubitably.
 
2008-04-11 09:25:18 AM  
Hmm, in the end they should have robbed him of all his money and taken all his stuff. THEN he'd be prepared.

Not that I'm bitter or anything. :)
 
2008-04-11 09:25:20 AM  
The Aristocrats!
 
2008-04-11 09:26:40 AM  
Marriage?

Heck, he's ready to have kids.
 
2008-04-11 09:26:42 AM  
That might prepare him for week 1 of marriage to me. After that it gets more challenging.

/I'm a guy though
//so the whole thing is illegal since I don't live in MA
 
2008-04-11 09:31:05 AM  
Yep, and it's about to go downhill fast from there.
 
2008-04-11 09:32:11 AM  
hell beans i was told there wasn't any video left. thank god they lied to me now i can see how bad my wedding got
 
2008-04-11 09:32:14 AM  
Prepare for marriage? That sounds like light foreplay to me.

I saw no reference to ball gags, candle wax, power tools, or "Master", so it hasn't moved in moderate foreplay yet.
 
2008-04-11 09:33:37 AM  
Don't use an electroshock weapon (commonly reffered to by its brand name Taser) on me bro!
 
2008-04-11 09:33:57 AM  
kc987654
That might prepare him for week 1 of marriage to me. After that it gets more challenging.

/I'm a guy though
//so the whole thing is illegal since I don't live in MA


Well, I'm sure you will find somewhere to hang your rainbow...and your special man...
 
2008-04-11 09:37:15 AM  
jaymanchu: Hmm, in the end they should have robbed him of all his money and taken all his stuff. THEN he'd be prepared.

Not that I'm bitter or anything. :)


Then knee him in the groin repeatedly, then he'd know what he's in for.

/hates sharp knees
//wife has really sharp knees
 
2008-04-11 09:39:54 AM  
That was funny.
 
2008-04-11 09:40:00 AM  
Skail: Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."

you sir a full of win.
 
2008-04-11 09:41:03 AM  
Skail: Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."

See you tomorrow!
 
2008-04-11 09:41:31 AM  
Getting married.
It's like getting your balls cut off, loosing complete control of your destiny, loosing friends and freedom, and loosing the will to live. Only much worse.

//at least the guy drinks. That usually helps.
///..."I need a six pack of Heineken just to keep from cutting her head off and stuffing it in a bowling ball bag".
 
2008-04-11 09:42:04 AM  
Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

The Taser in this case was perhaps crossing a line, I don't know. I've never been tased, bro.

/getting ready for my own blackening
//regretting participating in one last year
///anticipating vengeance
 
2008-04-11 09:42:22 AM  
You might be a redneck if...
 
2008-04-11 09:42:27 AM  
Dancin_In_Anson: Skail: Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."

See you tomorrow!


I'll bring the ice cubes and the stuffed water buffalo. Who's bringing the cattle prods?
 
2008-04-11 09:42:47 AM  
Dirtybird971: kc987654
That might prepare him for week 1 of marriage to me. After that it gets more challenging.

/I'm a guy though
//so the whole thing is illegal since I don't live in MA

Well, I'm sure you will find somewhere to hang your rainbow...and your special man...


My special man is already hung, thanks.

/and is in the other room watching SG-1 dvds
//no rainbows or unicorns though
 
2008-04-11 09:42:55 AM  
Well, they thought it was funny.
 
2008-04-11 09:44:25 AM  
Ramses Niblick The Third: Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

The Taser in this case was perhaps crossing a line, I don't know. I've never been tased, bro.

/getting ready for my own blackening
//regretting participating in one last year
///anticipating vengeance


Yeah you leave out the part where it all gets posted on www.straightlads.com and gay guys spank to it.
 
2008-04-11 09:45:26 AM  
A very smart culture that give you the sample before the goods.
Very good headline and 100% accurate with the addition of jaymanchu's comment
 
2008-04-11 09:47:19 AM  
Hieronymous Fark: A very smart culture that give you the sample before the goods.
Very good headline and 100% accurate with the addition of jaymanchu's and lincoln's comment
 
2008-04-11 09:48:17 AM  
I know guys who pay good money to be treated like that.
 
2008-04-11 09:49:47 AM  
Now that is someone who understands what foreplay is.
 
2008-04-11 09:50:04 AM  
Dufus: I know guys who pay good money to be treated like that.

And some of them don't run F1 racing.
 
2008-04-11 09:50:53 AM  
Death for you; life for my crops.

/Char-you tree/
 
2008-04-11 09:50:54 AM  
there are 2 things very, very wrong with that video and/or article

1. The Sheriff's name is Donna (i'm guessing that means female) and she is bothered by a bachelor party. She will never understand it.

and

2. They were drinking Bud Light!
 
2008-04-11 09:58:08 AM  
This has to be one of the all-time greatest bachelor pranks ever!

/of course some woman is farking it up
 
2008-04-11 09:58:22 AM  
kc987654: Ramses Niblick The Third: Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

Yeah you leave out the part where it all gets posted on www.straightlads.com and gay guys spank to it.


I can't decide if that would be flattering or disturbing.
 
2008-04-11 09:58:58 AM  
"We don't have Tasers," McIntosh said, so the sheriff's office has not addressed all the issues surrounding Tasers. Because the sheriff's office does not have Tasers, officials did not know the origin of the one used at the bachelor party.

Tasers, Tasers, Tasers, Tasers, Tasers. TASERS!
 
2008-04-11 09:59:05 AM  
ElwoodPDowd: Dancin_In_Anson: Skail: Well, jeez, I just call that "Saturday."

See you tomorrow!

I'll bring the ice cubes and the stuffed water buffalo. Who's bringing the cattle prods?


I've got the avocados and the hose pipe.
 
2008-04-11 09:59:30 AM  
Dude got off light.
 
2008-04-11 09:59:44 AM  
Gad - did he piss off his friends?
 
2008-04-11 10:00:28 AM  
Ramses Niblick The Third: kc987654: Ramses Niblick The Third: Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

Yeah you leave out the part where it all gets posted on www.straightlads.com and gay guys spank to it.

I can't decide if that would be flattering or disturbing.


Well I won't tell you about www.upyerkilt.net, then.
 
2008-04-11 10:02:19 AM  
kc987654: That might prepare him for week 1 of marriage to me. After that it gets more challenging.

/I'm a guy though
//so the whole thing is illegal since I don't live in MA/i>


What does Massachusetts have to do with anything?
 
2008-04-11 10:07:44 AM  
baka-san: I call fail, it's not a good party unless you come home with a traffic cone/.

He did...you just couldn't see it.
 
2008-04-11 10:09:38 AM  
kc987654: Ramses Niblick The Third: Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

Yeah you leave out the part where it all gets posted on www.straightlads.com and gay guys spank to it.

I can't decide if that would be flattering or disturbing.

Well I won't tell you about www.upyerkilt.net, then.

Why
do I follow these links? Is it too early for the alarm in my head to warn me about them? *sigh*

Anyway, I need to be more careful when wearing the kilt in public, judging from that site.
 
2008-04-11 10:11:32 AM  
I felt sorry for him till I found out he was a cop.

\not a cop hater
 
2008-04-11 10:15:47 AM  
Ramses Niblick The Third: kc987654: Ramses Niblick The Third: Back in my hometown in Scotland, it's a local tradition to "blacken" the groom-to-be in a similar fashion - capture, restrain, strip, coat in a variety of unpleasant substances and humiliatingly parade in public.

Yeah you leave out the part where it all gets posted on www.straightlads.com and gay guys spank to it.

I can't decide if that would be flattering or disturbing.

Well I won't tell you about www.upyerkilt.net, then.

Why do I follow these links? Is it too early for the alarm in my head to warn me about them? *sigh*

Anyway, I need to be more careful when wearing the kilt in public, judging from that site.


Yeah, when you're getting out of a car wearing a kilt say to yourself "what would Paris Hilton or Britney spears do in this situation" then do the opposite.
 
2008-04-11 10:15:50 AM  
Don't marry me, bro?
 
2008-04-11 10:18:26 AM  
FTFA: ...using an electronic weapon on anyone is a Class D crime, which is a misdemeanor, unless its use is by a law enforcement officer in an official capacity...

in which case its just good times...
 
2008-04-11 10:21:49 AM  
kc987654: Ramses Niblick The Third:

Anyway, I need to be more careful when wearing the kilt in public, judging from that site.

Yeah, when you're getting out of a car wearing a kilt say to yourself "what would Paris Hilton or Britney spears do in this situation" then do the opposite.


Sound advice, thank you - I just hope that I never accidentally say it out loud. Especially at a batchelor party.
 
2008-04-11 10:29:10 AM  
If there was ten of them, why did they have to taser him anyway? are they all pussies? I mean, those things are seriously dangerous. It wasn't enough to just get all ten guys to easily handcuff him and do that stuff for a joke, they had to taser his as first?
 
2008-04-11 10:29:33 AM  
sounds about like what we'd do to people PCSing out of our military units

/once saw a guy duct taped to an office chair, covered in ketchup/mustard/etc, on the side of a taxiway with a big sign reading "PILOTS SUCK"
//good times
 
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