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(Gawker)   Dane Cook, Dave Coulier, Jimmy Fallon and Paul Reiser. Ladies and gentlemen... the Final Four of the "Unfunniest Comic" bracket   (gawker.com) divider line 202
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4169 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 07 Apr 2008 at 5:35 AM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-04-07 09:19:54 AM
Rufus_T_Firefly: Maybe you guys can help me with a marketing idea.
Which would sell better: the Carlos Mencia dart boards, the Dane Cook toilet paper or the Jimmy Fallon ipecac syrup?


I don't want Dane Cook near my ass or my girlfriend's ass for that matter!
 
2008-04-07 09:26:18 AM
klymen: I said it before, I'll say it again. This competition is no good without Sarah Silverman.

i28.tinypic.com
 
2008-04-07 09:32:39 AM
Rufus_T_Firefly: Here's a version of the "handy bracketing system" (pops) that doesn't make your eyes bleed.

Damnit, I was wondering where Larry the Cable Guy was - he started out up against Dane Cook. Totally unfair to put those two powerhouses of suck in the first round together.
 
2008-04-07 09:34:39 AM
FarkedOver: I don't want Dane Cook near my ass or my girlfriend's ass for that matter!

So, you're saying that that negative attribute outweighs the smearing-fecal-matter-all-over-his-face aspect?

This is why research is key to developement...
 
2008-04-07 09:35:11 AM
flaggboy42: Hopefully Lewis Black was only removed from consideration in the last round. It takes a certain kind of suck to rip off Bill Hicks' act and still be unfunny.

This. They had Titus, Foxworthy, and Robin freaking Williams on the list.... but couldn't find a spot for Lewis Black? Being aimlessly angry isn't funny, and it never was. Look at George Carlin - the more pissed he's gotten, the less funny he is.
 
2008-04-07 09:42:47 AM
Can we make it some kind of Internet Law, akin to Godwin's, that any comedian that a given poster doesn't like totally stole everything from Bill Hicks?
 
2008-04-07 09:44:59 AM
This: Being aimlessly angry isn't funny, and it never was.

Don't get so upset, Smurfette.
 
2008-04-07 09:46:12 AM
Would Kathy Griffin be allowed on such a shiatty tour, she is about as funny as the wounded Vetrans ward at the VA
 
2008-04-07 09:46:27 AM
troymccluresf: Can we make it some kind of Internet Law, akin to Godwin's, that any comedian that a given poster doesn't like totally stole everything from Bill Hicks?

It's really more of a bylaw.
 
2008-04-07 09:49:07 AM
I dunno, I always thought Titus and Reiser were funny (but not in "Mad about you").

The dream bracket would be Cook, Fallon, Mencia, and Silverman. Silverman edging Cook in the final matchup. She is just a unique brand of unfunny.
 
2008-04-07 09:49:50 AM
paulseta: Reiser played Burke in Aliens, therefore is immune from criticism, along with anyone else in that film :-)

I came here to say this. And also that you don't see these comedians screwing each other over for a percentage.
 
2008-04-07 09:50:05 AM
I've come to the carefully considered conclusion that everyone, including myself, is completely devoid of a sense of humor. Seriously, I go through the thread thinking "man, how could you like that guy, he's ten tons of unfunny crammed into a five ton bag!" and then "wait, that guy is hilarious, how could you say he's not funny!" And I imagine most people can do the same thing, only with different comedians.

Ah, but Fark is also a fickle comedy mistress, everyone claims to hate Dane Cook but there used to be a lot of Farkers asking each other who shiat on the coats, and reminding each other that back in the day was a Wednesday. Family Guy was routinely quoted up until South Park ran a little two-parter which pointed out what was staggeringly obvious to mongoloids: Family Guy uses random jokes. All of a sudden the Family Guy quotes dropped off and when someone would reference the show an obligatory picture of a manatee nosing around a joke ball would be put up.

I'm trying to think of some comedian or group of comedians that would be universally thought of as funny on Fark. Mr. Show has detractors, as do the Kids In The Hall. I don't think I've ever seen anyone bag on: Monty Python, Eddie Izzard, or Airplane! But I think that's about it.
 
2008-04-07 09:52:09 AM
mofomisfit: But I think that's about it.

Possibly Monty Python....possibly.
 
2008-04-07 09:52:44 AM
leperboy69: Possibly Monty Python....possibly.

Disregard that.

/ need coffee
 
2008-04-07 09:59:00 AM
I've never seen it explained, so please -- tell me what's not funny about Sarah Silverman? I mean, granted, she probably wouldn't make my top 10, but c'mon... I want to know.
 
2008-04-07 10:04:19 AM
mofomisfit: I've come to the carefully considered conclusion that everyone, including myself, is completely devoid of a sense of humor. Seriously, I go through the thread thinking "man, how could you like that guy, he's ten tons of unfunny crammed into a five ton bag!" and then "wait, that guy is hilarious, how could you say he's not funny!" And I imagine most people can do the same thing, only with different comedians.

Ah, but Fark is also a fickle comedy mistress, everyone claims to hate Dane Cook but there used to be a lot of Farkers asking each other who shiat on the coats, and reminding each other that back in the day was a Wednesday. Family Guy was routinely quoted up until South Park ran a little two-parter which pointed out what was staggeringly obvious to mongoloids: Family Guy uses random jokes. All of a sudden the Family Guy quotes dropped off and when someone would reference the show an obligatory picture of a manatee nosing around a joke ball would be put up.

I'm trying to think of some comedian or group of comedians that would be universally thought of as funny on Fark. Mr. Show has detractors, as do the Kids In The Hall. I don't think I've ever seen anyone bag on: Monty Python, Eddie Izzard, or Airplane! But I think that's about it.



Opinions vary.

No one is ever going to agree on comedians, politics, religion, food, alcohol, films, tv shows, sports, or favorite Girl Scout cookie. Welcome to Fark life.
 
2008-04-07 10:08:42 AM
I realize most of the Farkers in this thread are from the US, but...if anyone in this thread had ever heard of Jo Brand, this thread would have been over a long time ago.

I have never seen any "comedian" so monstrously untalented and yet so feted by the media. Every single routine of hers is exactly the same (some variation of "Men are pigs" or "I'm fat, deal with it") and yet she was getting a "comedy special" every damn year from one or more British TV channels, despite terrible ratings. It was almost like they were doing some kind of penance: OK, we'll do another Jo Brand special, just please let us do another season of Red Dwarf or Spaced or Ab Fab. I'd rather watch a 24-hour channel starring all the rest of the comedians in this thread for a week than be forced to sit through a Jo Brand special.
 
2008-04-07 10:09:13 AM
mofomisfit: I don't think I've ever seen anyone bag on: Monty Python, Eddie Izzard, or Airplane! But I think that's about it.

Put me on the list for "never having bagged on Airplane!".

I'm only 24 and I still think that's the funniest movie of all time.
 
2008-04-07 10:14:42 AM
paulseta: Reiser played Burke in Aliens, therefore is immune from criticism, along with anyone else in that film :-)

Amen.
 
2008-04-07 10:15:46 AM
How is Pauly Shore not in this list? Even Jimmy Fallon is funnier than that tool.
 
2008-04-07 10:16:52 AM
Dave Coulier had a really funny 10 minutes on an hbo comedy show in the 80s, that was totally geared towards adults.

I remember because he talked about Walt Disney animatronics masturbating.
 
2008-04-07 10:17:50 AM
GoodyearPimp:
I've never seen it explained, so please -- tell me what's not funny about Sarah Silverman?

Hard to put your finger on it, except to say that her comedy is completely devoid of intelligence, consisting mostly of "Oops I farted/crapped myself" jokes, or her posing while grabbing her oversized can.

Her comedic timing is awful, she wouldn't know wit if it bit her. But other than that, she's hot.
 
2008-04-07 10:18:33 AM
Wait! I just figured it out. Pauly Shore is too unfunny to be considered a comic. Including him would be like including Hitler in the list.

/Yes, I went there.
 
2008-04-07 10:18:57 AM
Whats ironic is this radio show is worse than any comic they mentioned, toucher is a no chin, fat, alcoholic and rich is the radio stunt/hack guy.

I have been to boston so its no wonder that the douches up there find them funny, dumbest people in the country.
 
2008-04-07 10:19:07 AM
the lanatic: How is Pauly Shore not in this list? Even Jimmy Fallon is funnier than that tool.

Pauly Shore is still alive? I though his suck had caused him to implode into a black hole a long time ago.
 
2008-04-07 10:29:36 AM
I'll defend some of these comedians (Dane Cook, Larry the Cable guy) who do acts that aren't just pointing out cultural differences and passing them off as jokes "white people do this, black people do this. Single people do this, married people do this. Men do this, Women do this" (Mencia, Cho, Chappelle)
 
2008-04-07 10:32:37 AM
@Fact Man

Umm, redneck comedians like Larry the Cable Guy are the epitome of cultural-difference-jokes. They just focus on the "city-slicker" vs "redneck" divide. And bombing the Muslims, because patriotic violence is funny.
 
2008-04-07 10:32:43 AM
I thought that the unfunniest comic was Garfield.
 
2008-04-07 10:33:23 AM
Rufus_T_Firefly: FarkedOver: I don't want Dane Cook near my ass or my girlfriend's ass for that matter!

So, you're saying that that negative attribute outweighs the smearing-fecal-matter-all-over-his-face aspect?

This is why research is key to developement...


Basically, my shiat is too good for Dane Cook. There I said it. I feel better now.
 
2008-04-07 10:33:26 AM
No Margaret Cho?

If she wasn't an inexplicable gay icon, she'd be folding sweaters at the Gap.

/HAHA, MY MOTHER'S ACCENT IS HIGH-LARIOUS.
//OOOHHH, I SAID 'BUTTSEX!"
 
2008-04-07 10:35:58 AM
Sgt Otter: No Margaret Cho?

If she wasn't an inexplicable gay icon, she'd be folding sweaters at the Gap.

/HAHA, MY MOTHER'S ACCENT IS HIGH-LARIOUS.
//OOOHHH, I SAID 'BUTTSEX!"


See the bracketing table somebody posted - beaten out by Coulier.
 
2008-04-07 10:38:02 AM
Pxtl: @Fact Man

Umm, redneck comedians like Larry the Cable Guy are the epitome of cultural-difference-jokes. They just focus on the "city-slicker" vs "redneck" divide. And bombing the Muslims, because patriotic violence is funny.


I've seen Larry the Cable Guy's shows, and I don't think he's that funny, but he doesn't do a "rednecks do this, non-rednecks to this" format. And he's never mentioned anything about war or muslims or anything like that as far as I've seen.
 
2008-04-07 10:38:50 AM
cubsfan07

That was an OK but unnecessary summary of my post.
 
2008-04-07 10:39:01 AM
This: Rufus_T_Firefly: Here's a version of the "handy bracketing system" (pops) that doesn't make your eyes bleed.

Damnit, I was wondering where Larry the Cable Guy was - he started out up against Dane Cook. Totally unfair to put those two powerhouses of suck in the first round together.


I had the same problem. There is no way I have Dane Cook worse than Larry the Cable Guy, though. He is truly the least funny comedian I have seen in a long time. That Git 'R Done shiat should have gotten him an automatic bye all the way to the final.
 
2008-04-07 10:39:49 AM
Sgt Otter: No Margaret Cho?

If she wasn't an inexplicable gay icon, she'd be folding sweaters at the Gap.

/HAHA, MY MOTHER'S ACCENT IS HIGH-LARIOUS.
//OOOHHH, I SAID 'BUTTSEX!"



Yes, she sucks and has probably set back Asian-American progess against stereotypes by about 50 years. However, she was in Face/Off, which co-starred Gina Gershon. This, in turn, automatically invokes the Gina Gershon RuleTM, where anything featuring or relating to her is automatically full of WIN.
 
2008-04-07 10:42:56 AM
cubsfan07

Um I thought that it was decided that the best Girl Scout Cookie is Thin Mint.
 
2008-04-07 10:43:14 AM
Fact Man: Pxtl: @Fact Man

Umm, redneck comedians like Larry the Cable Guy are the epitome of cultural-difference-jokes. They just focus on the "city-slicker" vs "redneck" divide. And bombing the Muslims, because patriotic violence is funny.

I've seen Larry the Cable Guy's shows, and I don't think he's that funny, but he doesn't do a "rednecks do this, non-rednecks to this" format. And he's never mentioned anything about war or muslims or anything like that as far as I've seen.


I might have him confused with another redneck comic there - I used to listen to Sirius Radio on my commute, and tried to listen to the redneck stand-up station while the other two comedy stations were stuck on suck, and they all bled together.
 
2008-04-07 10:48:19 AM
Federal_District_X: GoodyearPimp:
I've never seen it explained, so please -- tell me what's not funny about Sarah Silverman?

Hard to put your finger on it, except to say that her comedy is completely devoid of intelligence, consisting mostly of "Oops I farted/crapped myself" jokes, or her posing while grabbing her oversized can.

Her comedic timing is awful, she wouldn't know wit if it bit her. But other than that, she's hot.


This I dont get, whats hot about her? Shes lanky, big nose, shiatty looking tranny hair, and no ass nothing hot about that package. The only funny thing she did was the matt damon song and that was only funny because she got damnon to be in the video.

She is the worst female comic out there hands down.
 
2008-04-07 10:50:36 AM
Fact Man: And he's never mentioned anything about war or muslims or anything like that as far as I've seen.

I caught bits and pieces of LTCG's act recently on Comedy Central and one of his gags was about the only similarity between a terrorist and a baby was that one had a diaper on his head and the other on his arse... and that they were both full of shiat.

In short: he's a tool.
 
2008-04-07 10:52:15 AM
JetpackJesus: This: Rufus_T_Firefly: Here's a version of the "handy bracketing system" (pops) that doesn't make your eyes bleed.

Damnit, I was wondering where Larry the Cable Guy was - he started out up against Dane Cook. Totally unfair to put those two powerhouses of suck in the first round together.

I had the same problem. There is no way I have Dane Cook worse than Larry the Cable Guy, though. He is truly the least funny comedian I have seen in a long time. That Git 'R Done shiat should have gotten him an automatic bye all the way to the final.


Attention all cable guy haters, its a farking act! This is widely known for anyone who has seen the video on the internet, so take heart that all those rubes and rednecks buying his shiat are really so stupid they dont realize they are getting made fun of by him.
 
2008-04-07 10:57:31 AM
I'll take Ben Stiller for the block.
 
2008-04-07 10:58:36 AM
What, no Pauley Shore? This competition sucks, buuuuuuuudy
 
2008-04-07 11:00:08 AM
Kurmudgeon: What, no Pauley Shore? This competition sucks, buuuuuuuudy

And will we discuss the merits and flaws of Benny Hill? Richard Pryor? George Bernard Shaw?

What year do you think it is? I wasn't aware that Fark had a wormhole into the early '90s.
 
2008-04-07 11:02:55 AM
No Mitch Hedburg?
 
2008-04-07 11:04:39 AM
I disagree with the seeding. Matching Fallon and Mencia at the beginning is not right because Mencia should have made it to the next tier. He should be given his props for being unfunny.
 
2008-04-07 11:04:51 AM
EchoDork: No Mitch Hedburg?

I actually think he's funny in small doses. Obviously wouldn't want to watch a full HBO special, but I'll laugh my ass off until his shtick starts getting tired.
 
2008-04-07 11:05:08 AM
EchoDork: No Mitch Hedburg?

Well maybe they were limiting it to live comedians, I never found him remotely funny either and I was a stoner during that time so it sounded like one of my friends up on stage talking shiat.
 
2008-04-07 11:05:16 AM
Fallon, easily


don't believe me? Go find the celebrity Jeopardy with Dave Matthews


/It was a sin he was allowed on the field at Fenway
 
2008-04-07 11:06:40 AM
Competition meaningless without Ray J. Johnson.

"You can call me Ray... or you can call me J... Ughhhh. That bit was funny for about 5 seconds." -Hershal Schmoikel Krustofsky (too lazy to look up if I spelled that right).
 
2008-04-07 11:09:05 AM
EchoDork: No Mitch Hedburg?

Furthermore, No Dennis Leary?
 
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