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(CBS5.com)   Accused killer testifies, "I'm an A**hole, but I'm no murderer"   (cbs5.com) divider line 90
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8767 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Mar 2008 at 11:54 PM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-03-18 11:47:52 PM
Oh, God, if being an asshole made you a murderer everyone on Fark would be doing 25 to life.

Damn shame this man developed (or stole, depending on your view) one of the better linux file systems out there.
 
2008-03-18 11:57:42 PM
To thine own self be true????
 
2008-03-18 11:58:13 PM
The Denis Leary Defense?
 
2008-03-18 11:58:33 PM
nashBridges: Oh, God, if being an asshole made you a murderer everyone on Fark would be doing 25 to life.


i resemble resent that remark you jerkwad
 
2008-03-18 11:58:48 PM
Convinced me.
 
2008-03-18 11:59:37 PM
Is murder GPL or LGPL?
 
2008-03-19 12:00:44 AM
www.courier-journal.com

Hey, it worked for this guy.
 
2008-03-19 12:01:17 AM
nashBridges

Oh, God, if being an asshole made you a murderer everyone on Fark would be doing 25 to life.

I don't have time to read your pathetic snark, I have to go to the gym in 16 minutes. I'm a Mensa member too.

/...and there goes my parole
 
2008-03-19 12:01:47 AM
I might have screwed your sister, but I'll never screw your mum
I might have been to college, but at least I know I'm dumb.
 
2008-03-19 12:02:14 AM
Wow, reading this testimony, he's farked. He strikes me as one of these types who's smart, but not in a way that applies to all facets of life. He thought this prosecutor was a lightweight who he would easily best with his intellectual might. And he probably landed himself a guilty verdict.
 
2008-03-19 12:03:56 AM
Raging Thespian: The Denis Leary Defense?

/my brain
//get out of it
 
2008-03-19 12:04:10 AM
He's an asshole! (He's an asshole!)
 
2008-03-19 12:04:10 AM
It's a slippery slope. At first you cut off a few cars on the highway or call your girlfriend fat. Before you know it you're in a seedy hotel room with a dead hooker and a hobo with a camcorder.
 
2008-03-19 12:04:15 AM
llnw.image.cbslocal.com

Obviously the face palm defense.
 
2008-03-19 12:04:23 AM
jake_lex: Wow, reading this testimony, he's farked. He strikes me as one of these types who's smart, but not in a way that applies to all facets of life. He thought this prosecutor was a lightweight who he would easily best with his intellectual might. And he probably landed himself a guilty verdict.

To me he just comes off as an asshole. An honest asshole. I think that's how I would react. Yeah I could have killed her, but so could anyone my size.
 
2008-03-19 12:04:37 AM
"A**hole"
www.beattheboss.tv
 
2008-03-19 12:04:47 AM
His sketch looks an awful lot like the Mad TV guy.......
 
2008-03-19 12:04:55 AM
I'm going to draw a conclusion here that you may or may not get... follow me:

"Her body has never been found despite extensive searches in the Oakland hills and elsewhere, and the defense has suggested she may be living in her native Russia."

"But prosecutors said Nina Reiser would never have left her children, who ultimately were placed in the custody of Nina's mother and currently are living with her in St. Petersburg, Russia."

okay.. tell me if you see it.
 
2008-03-19 12:05:02 AM
They're accusing assholes of murder now?
I gotta get to Mexico...
 
2008-03-19 12:06:27 AM
I shot the Sheriff, but I DID NOT shoot the deputy!
 
2008-03-19 12:07:17 AM
danar75: /my brain
//get out of it


Wow...really roomy in here... :D
 
2008-03-19 12:08:34 AM
okay.. tell me if you see it.

I think I see what you did there....but do you have any sort of illustration to clear it up?
 
2008-03-19 12:08:41 AM
IXI Jim IXI: danar75: /my brain
//get out of it

Wow...really roomy in here... :D


Hey, this isn't where I parked my car...car...car...
 
2008-03-19 12:08:46 AM
Dr.Knockboots: I'm going to draw a conclusion here that you may or may not get... follow me:

"Her body has never been found despite extensive searches in the Oakland hills and elsewhere, and the defense has suggested she may be living in her native Russia."

"But prosecutors said Nina Reiser would never have left her children, who ultimately were placed in the custody of Nina's mother and currently are living with her in St. Petersburg, Russia."

okay.. tell me if you see it.


Nope. But what do I know, I'm an asshole.

/good point
 
2008-03-19 12:08:52 AM
Dunno... give me a 3 day old Subway sub, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut. Then I think my asshole is capable of murder.
 
2008-03-19 12:09:38 AM
skeeterjennings: They're accusing assholes of murder now?
I gotta get to Mexico...


Asshole profiling is a dirty job.
 
2008-03-19 12:11:06 AM
Who's his attorney, Kevin Lomax?
 
2008-03-19 12:11:37 AM
SFGate has some person liveblogging from the trial... It's pretty interesting stuff.

Right here. (new window)
 
2008-03-19 12:12:33 AM
"I'm an asshole" (pops)

/had to
 
2008-03-19 12:13:24 AM
i've been drinking, but I wasn't motherfukkin driving
 
2008-03-19 12:13:37 AM
So a guy walks into a bar and starts bad-mouthing lawyers. He calls them liars, and he calls them assholes. Suddenly, a man seated next to jumps up and yells,
"Hey, I resent what you just said!"

The guy then asks him, "Why? Are you a lawyer???"


And the man replies:
"No, I'm an asshole!!!"
 
2008-03-19 12:15:38 AM
www.toocan.com
 
2008-03-19 12:16:05 AM
FTFA: But prosecutors said Nina Reiser would never have left her children

Because it's impossible for a woman to have left her children, she must have been murdered. BY YOU.

How the fark is this guy on trial for murder if there's no body?
 
2008-03-19 12:17:21 AM
Accused killer testifies, "I'm an A**hole, but I'm no murderer"

Then life is too much, simply electrocute the farker.
 
2008-03-19 12:18:35 AM
Oh come on. It's HANS FRICKIN REISER. We deserve a better headline.
 
2008-03-19 12:20:11 AM
Kar98: IXI Jim IXI: danar75: /my brain
//get out of it

Wow...really roomy in here... :D

Hey, this isn't where I parked my car...car...car...


Har.

Har.

/Phi Beta Kappa, biatches
 
2008-03-19 12:24:34 AM
Does this mean every time he faps he's touching his dick to his asshole?
 
2008-03-19 12:25:40 AM
I haven't really been following the case. Has there been any evidence yet that shows that Nina Reiser was actually murdered? Or is it all still 100% circumstantial?
 
2008-03-19 12:26:55 AM
James Brown: I haven't really been following the case. Has there been any evidence yet that shows that Nina Reiser was actually murdered? Or is it all still 100% circumstantial?

Still 100% circumstantial.
 
2008-03-19 12:28:57 AM
bsuhorndog: How the fark is this guy on trial for murder if there's no body?

Blood evidence. Still doesn't mean he did it. You'll have to google the entire sordid case.

Bucky Katt: i resemble resent that remark you jerkwad

Fark off, Nancy.

The Grinch: I don't have time to read your pathetic snark, I have to go to the gym in 16 minutes. I'm a Mensa member too.

Mensa is what pedophiles apply for to make themselves feel smart. It doesn't change the fact that they like to fark children.
 
2008-03-19 12:28:59 AM
www.drunkenblog.com


Approves.
 
2008-03-19 12:30:37 AM
bestuff.com

Must be his lawyer.
 
2008-03-19 12:30:52 AM
farkingatwork: Does this mean every time he faps he's touching his dick to his asshole?

What, that isn't the right way to do it?

/slinks quietly from thread in shame
 
2008-03-19 12:34:54 AM
SirGunslinger: Dunno... give me a 3 day old Subway sub, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut. Then I think my asshole is capable of murder.

Do it right: 10 Sierra Nevadas, 6 Knob Creek shots, 2 Petron's, and a garlic white pizza when you get home.

Wife accused me of dumping my pants...
 
2008-03-19 12:38:23 AM
"This ship is filled with assholes!"
 
2008-03-19 12:38:51 AM
empres77: Hey, it worked for this guy.

oh wow another O J was guilty asstunnel.
 
2008-03-19 12:39:36 AM
nashBridges: SirGunslinger: Dunno... give me a 3 day old Subway sub, Taco Bell, and Pizza Hut. Then I think my asshole is capable of murder.

Do it right: 10 Sierra Nevadas, 6 Knob Creek shots, 2 Petron's, and a garlic white pizza when you get home.

Wife accused me of dumping my pants...


10 Sierra's at 5.6% alcohol content and 8 shots? If that's your average weekend night, congrats, you're a drunk! I hope you're a funny one and not a punchy or shouty one.
 
2008-03-19 12:40:57 AM
Kar98: IXI Jim IXI: danar75: /my brain
//get out of it

Wow...really roomy in here... :D

Hey, this isn't where I parked my car...car...car...


I've got to concentrate... concentrate... concentrate... I've got to concentrate... concentrate... concentrate... Hello?... hello... hello... Echo... echo... echo... Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon... Manny Mota... Mota... Mota...

/looks like i picked the wrong week to stop doing slashes
 
2008-03-19 12:42:01 AM
WaltzingMathilda: Do it right: 10 Sierra Nevadas, 6 Knob Creek shots, 2 Petron's, and a garlic white pizza when you get home.

Wife accused me of dumping my pants...

10 Sierra's at 5.6% alcohol content and 8 shots? If that's your average weekend night, congrats, you're a drunk! I hope you're a funny one and not a punchy or shouty one.



Weekend night? That sounds like a weekday to me. Mmmmm Knob Creek. Ever try Baker's? Wow.
 
2008-03-19 12:45:32 AM
I Borrowed Your Mom's Bong: WaltzingMathilda: Do it right: 10 Sierra Nevadas, 6 Knob Creek shots, 2 Petron's, and a garlic white pizza when you get home.

Wife accused me of dumping my pants...

10 Sierra's at 5.6% alcohol content and 8 shots? If that's your average weekend night, congrats, you're a drunk! I hope you're a funny one and not a punchy or shouty one.


Weekend night? That sounds like a weekday to me. Mmmmm Knob Creek. Ever try Baker's? Wow.


Hey I'm a whiskey lover, mostly scotch (Lagavulin FTW). I'm not condemning, but that kind of a bender is usually reserved for 21st birthdays (we're looking at over 21 shots here since sierra is stronger than your average american lager). If you're pulling that off on weekdays, well, wow.
 
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