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(TC Palm)   Man found walking naked down highway says Jesus told him to   (tcpalm.com) divider line 74
    More: Florida  
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5496 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Mar 2008 at 1:20 AM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-03-15 07:26:51 AM
I say Go For It!
 
2008-03-15 07:29:52 AM
Uncle Bill (new window)
 
2008-03-15 08:32:13 AM
That's not really exclusive to Florida, to be fair.

I knew a girl who was on LSD and did this for 3 days. I knew a guy who was just a caffeine addict and he did it, too, not naked but in his pajamas.
 
2008-03-15 08:45:27 AM
deevo: That's not really exclusive to Florida, to be fair.

I knew a girl who was on LSD and did this for 3 days. I knew a guy who was just a caffeine addict and he did it, too, not naked but in his pajamas.


well than it's not really the same thing at all he was wearing pajama's, however naked lsd times are good times.
 
2008-03-15 09:05:50 AM
Don't you people know a desperate cry for help?
Jesus was kidnapped and now is naked because of the weiner poopies.

Weiner Poopie Ransom Note for Jesus News
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxkBYzkBnW8 (pops)

"We are holding Jesus ransom until you clean up the poopie from your wieners and trust us we see you take your wieners for long walks without picking up their poopie in our yards. This has upset us dearly so please clean up all the weiner poopie, if you want to see Jesus unharmed. Sincerely, Lindy Lane Residents."

// Have you found Jesus? Had problems with your poopie from your wieners?
/// This man was looking for Jesus, a naked Jesus.
 
2008-03-15 09:11:47 AM
img99.imageshack.us
/Wanted for Questioning.
 
2008-03-15 09:16:02 AM
I came for the Dogma references and left satisfied.

/'cause the Big Lebowski was represented too
 
2008-03-15 10:03:03 AM
I knew the state before I even looked at the tag.
 
2008-03-15 10:10:19 AM
HMS_Blinkin: I knew the state before I even looked at the tag.


same
 
2008-03-15 10:14:56 AM
Theeng: From TFA.

Authorities said a man charged with exposure of sexual organs was showing a lot more than that on a stretch of U.S. 1 Thursday morning.

I fail to understand the writer's logic, or is there some other area other than "sexual organs" that is more taboo on the human body?


I swear to God, I imagined the naked man bending over, exposing his anus by pulling his butt cheeks apart with his hands, a-la gootse, and then taking a poo on the sidewalk. That's the only thing I could think of for "showing a lot more than sexual organs."

By the way everyone, there is a dude in Fort Pierce who has been exposing himself on US1 at least as long as I have been out of Middle School. They used to make fun of the guy on The Love Doctors radio show. That's what, 20 years now? Crazy guy runs around wrapped in a flag most of the time.
 
2008-03-15 11:06:15 AM
zeitzeichen.skileon.de

/who are we to doubt

images.wolfgangsvault.com

/we won't get fool again
 
2008-03-15 11:38:39 AM
Ihaveanevilparrot: Sounds like the guy was schizophrenic. It's common for someone with severe forms of schizophrenia to do something like that and think god/jesus/anyone else told them to.
They may realize later on how ridiculous it was, but they will actually hear a voice in their head and associate it with someone.


The Son of Sam said a barking dog told him to kill people. See, so it's not always Jesus' fault!
 
2008-03-15 11:48:35 AM
Suicidal Writer: Authorities said a man charged with exposure of sexual organs...

How does this make us different form some Middle Eastern countries? How the hell can showing a body part be a crime? I'm trying to find the logic. There is no human race without those body parts, yet we are somehow ashamed of them? We let every other species show them but not us? What the hell? How is this even allowed to be a crime? I don't see how this is different from rigid Islamic dress codes, except for the fact the each culture looks at the other with disgust.

Wow, someone has a dick, big shocker [?]


my sentiments exactly. ask me why i think we should all be nudists!
 
2008-03-15 11:50:53 AM
Oblio13: We're just lucky He didn't tell a whole mega-church of AARP folks to do it.

I'm appalled at the thought of 75% of Florida's population wandering around naked and SAGGY, I really need a bottle of liquor to get that out of my head. Not even 9:00a? OH CRAP!
 
2008-03-15 11:51:02 AM
I wouldnt hold Jesus responsible for this one...it happens all the time here. I've been flashed multiple times by pervy old men in the West Palm Beach area. Port St. Lucie & Indian River Counties even have their own sex offender channel. Which is incredibly entertaining to watch...until you notice that the vast majority of these offenders are right down the street from your hotel.
 
2008-03-15 12:10:29 PM
jynxyu: I'm appalled at the thought of 75% of Florida's population wandering around naked and SAGGY, I really need a bottle of liquor to get that out of my head. Not even 9:00a? OH CRAP!

You wouldn't get a thrill out of my downloaded "saggy old ladies" (Granny Porn) I bet.

It is pretty amusing to think of these young kids out there thinking, "I'll never get old. My boobs will never sag. My neck will never look like vulture's neck. My butt will always be firm and fit. My legs will never be top-heavy with rippled fat."

These spoiled cynical teenagers really need an honest peek at their future so they don't go haunting the halls of "The Frankenstein School of Beauty". They also need to remember that old women and old men still want the same wild sexual thrills that horny teens do and most old folks really don't see themselves as "wrinkled old farts", but merely great energetic men or women trapped in a body that is no longer a source of thrills for people 20-years younger than themselves.

// The mockery (aside from obvious health issues) is honestly a fear of becoming shriveled and helpless. The primary fear is that of death, but lingering mockery by kids in their pre-30's is also very strong.
/// My personal rule would be that nakedness in a public area should be legal only if the naked person has a fit body and is attractive enough that 30% of the local population finds the naked person "not repulsive" and the naked person is not making a jackass of themselves.
 
2008-03-15 12:15:11 PM
yyaskyy: Ihaveanevilparrot: Sounds like the guy was schizophrenic. It's common for someone with severe forms of schizophrenia to do something like that and think god/jesus/anyone else told them to.
They may realize later on how ridiculous it was, but they will actually hear a voice in their head and associate it with someone.

does your imaginary friend believe you exist


What imaginary friend?

(Oh god, he knows)
 
2008-03-15 12:42:06 PM
To be fair, Jose and Mario advised against it.
 
2008-03-15 04:57:50 PM
ohhhh, that Jesus! He's always tricking people!
 
2008-03-15 06:23:23 PM
img215.imageshack.us
 
2008-03-15 07:23:17 PM
gangrel_pri: Men don't just fall out of the sky, you know!

*Chris rock falls*

Naked big t***d women just don't fall out of the sky!?

/not obscure.


it should not have taken so long to find you. not obscure. the other farkers are slacking ;)
 
2008-03-15 07:42:50 PM
Mark 6:8
And commanded them that they should take nothing for their journey, save a staff only; no scrip, no bread, no money in their purse:

Luke 9:3
And he said unto them, Take nothing for your journey, neither staves, nor scrip, neither bread, neither money; neither have two coats apiece.

He read the wrong Gospel. I blame sloppy editing.
 
2008-03-15 08:08:42 PM
That's so good I had to stop and send it to my evangelical brother. He'll be tickled pink and it'll make the rounds until somebody puts it in a sermon, and you'll never be able to kill it after that.

I quote from the King James Version. I love the old-timey English because it constantly reminds you that what you are reading was written by and for old-timey people. None of this Mod English for me.
 
2008-03-15 08:53:01 PM
Gridlock:

You wouldn't get a thrill out of my downloaded "saggy old ladies" (Granny Porn) I bet.

It is pretty amusing to think of these young kids out there thinking, "I'll never get old. My boobs will never sag. My neck will never look like vulture's neck. My butt will always be firm and fit. My legs will never be top-heavy with rippled fat."

These spoiled cynical teenagers really need an honest peek at their future so they don't go haunting the halls of "The Frankenstein School of Beauty". They also need to remember that old women and old men still want the same wild sexual thrills that horny teens do and most old folks really don't see themselves as "wrinkled old farts", but merely great energetic men or women trapped in a body that is no longer a source of thrills for people 20-years younger than themselves.

// The mockery (aside from obvious health issues) is honestly a fear of becoming shriveled and helpless. The primary fear is that of death, but lingering mockery by kids in their pre-30's is also very strong.
/// My personal rule would be that nakedness in a public area should be legal only if the naked person has a fit body and is attractive enough that 30% of the local population finds the naked person "not repulsive" and the naked person is not making a jackass of themselves.



I thought you fat old people were supposed to be jolly.
 
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