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(ABC News)   Americans dislike anal exams   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

2043 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Aug 2001 at 8:10 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

58 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-08-07 08:19:01 AM  
The French on the other hand...
2001-08-07 08:29:08 AM  
"fecal occult blood tests"

Are they gonna take the blood and smear it over their bodies while dancing around a pentagram chanting on the night of a full moon?
2001-08-07 08:29:17 AM  
Hell... I am just waiting to hit 50 so I have an excuse to get one...
2001-08-07 08:31:46 AM  
Uh...Mojo, they start at 40. I just turned 40 a short time ago. I hate going to the doctor now.
2001-08-07 08:39:57 AM  
And the all too famous words: "Hey, just relax, it'll be over in no time."

"Dr. Bishop, to ER stat... Dr. Bishop to ER stat, for emergency removal of a tube of KY from Dr. Ritter."

Had my first one at 29, and oh the horror. The absolute utter horror. (shudder)
2001-08-07 08:40:39 AM  
I want dinner and a movie before some doc gets that friendly with me.
2001-08-07 08:41:27 AM  
Cancer is a nice way to go. You go slow so you can say goodbye to your friends and get some morphine drip going in the end. fark the rectal probe.
2001-08-07 08:49:28 AM  
... except for Jelloboy.

/me hides.
2001-08-07 08:50:01 AM  
sheesh... get over it. I can't imagine not getting such an important test because I was embarassed... They are doctors, they don't care about seeing your ass. As for the discomfort, sounds better than an early death to me.

Are women this unreaonable about pap tests/mamograms?
2001-08-07 08:57:36 AM  

I agree that they are extremely important. I just don't have to like them. Which I think goes without having to be said. heh

I suppose that there is some justice to be had knowing that the doctors have to get them too.
2001-08-07 08:59:54 AM  
Ick...excellent use of the obvious tag here
2001-08-07 09:02:37 AM  
American Anal Exam

Q1/ Where is your anus?
2001-08-07 09:03:05 AM  
speak for yourself.
2001-08-07 09:12:42 AM  
Cormee - thu far sied ov Satern. Doo I pas?
2001-08-07 09:18:25 AM  
I hear the fellows in San Francisco LOVE going in (sorry) for their exams as long as they involve gerbils with little flashlights and cameras strapped to their furry little bodies.

Q:How does a proctologist give an exam in San Francisco?
A:He puts both hands on your shoulders.

(told to me by an actual proctologist)
2001-08-07 09:28:06 AM  
unless you are a flaming homo
2001-08-07 10:01:21 AM  
Mojo, I don't think that we are unreasonable about getting the PAP but they suck big time. I have to get them every three months so I probably hate them more than most. If you want to know if a woman is unreasonable about them, next time you are getting ready to mount up tell her to scoot to the end of the table.
2001-08-07 10:12:56 AM  
Wow Badger... homosexual San Francisco references... you truly are the epitome of wit.

Oh man... gerbils... whoo boy! I literally fell off my chair!
2001-08-07 10:14:31 AM  
Oh, and Slang, I didn't say women were unreasonable about it. They do it. I was implying that they recognize the importance of the exams and deal with the discomfort/embarassment.

Also, I bring you love.
2001-08-07 10:15:54 AM  
This article is rubbish - all americans love it up the chocolate starfish.
2001-08-07 10:16:56 AM  
I hate going to the gyno so much. Thats why I don't go.
2001-08-07 10:17:35 AM  
I hate going to any kind of doctors peroid.
2001-08-07 10:18:19 AM  
Labberdasher: if your anus is the far side of saturn i'd say you pass every few months

Mme.Mersault - truly a heart warming story - something to tell the grandkids eh!??! :)
2001-08-07 10:20:34 AM  
Mojo, not flaming, just answering. Loves to you too snookums

Jerseydevil, you should go. I'd be dead by now if I would have missed 1 exam a few years ago. There are certain things that are easy to treat if found in time, fatal if they are not.
2001-08-07 10:23:32 AM  
I tried going to the gynecologist, but they insisted they could not check my vagina or uterus... They claimed boys don't have them.

Sexist bastards.
2001-08-07 10:37:03 AM  
During the exam I always look to be sure the doctor dosen't have both his hands on my back
2001-08-07 10:46:06 AM  
You can have the prostate test done with a blood sample.
2001-08-07 10:47:15 AM  
Doctor, why do you need 6 friends to help with this exam?
And why is that doctor dressed in leather?
I want a second opinion.
2001-08-07 10:56:06 AM  
Why cant everything be NON INVASIVE... I mean just the thought.... and then oh wow.... but Id rather get one and not die from it... now is checking for prostrate cancer the same? Oh god!

2001-08-07 11:00:13 AM  
The dreaded Poop Chute review.
2001-08-07 11:19:51 AM  
I had the joy of experiencing a colonoscopy a few years ago at age 22. Usually when I catch a guy looking at my backside, I find it quite flattering. This was a bit different. But I have to say that watching the procedure on the video monitors in the room was interesting. interesting as intestines can be.
2001-08-07 11:40:34 AM  
During my last exam, after the doctor did the anal probe, I asked if he would please stick a different finger up my ass. He looked at me funny and asked why. I told him I wanted a second opinion. I thought it was an old joke but he hadn't heard it and thought it was funny.
2001-08-07 11:43:49 AM  
Revenge can be as easy as eating 3 cans of chili 5 hours before your exam.
2001-08-07 11:45:33 AM  
DeiterLee: when the doctor has his/her finger up your ass it is NOT a suitable time to be joking - NOT i tell you!! ((shivers))
2001-08-07 11:51:22 AM  
Personally, I think most doctors are just perverts. Why is it they make me get undressed when I go in for something like a sore wrist?
2001-08-07 11:51:59 AM  
Cormee: You bet the finger was out before the joke. I wasn't in a joking mood while it was in.
2001-08-07 12:03:32 PM  
Evil: Revenge can be as easy as eating 3 cans of chili 5 hours before your exam.

Revenge? For what, the doctor trying to ensure you aren't at risk for a deadly disease?
2001-08-07 01:10:32 PM  
It made me feel a little better (but not much) on the first one when the Doc told me he didn't like giving any more than I liked getting. Now I have a female Doc and if something like this must be done, at least I can pretend there's something sexual involved.
2001-08-07 01:28:39 PM  
Pray for small fingers
2001-08-07 01:30:51 PM  
Most Americans have their heads so far up their asses I'm surprised doctors can get a probe in anyway.
2001-08-07 01:50:41 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2001-08-07 02:01:21 PM  
People should get all their anal exams done by aliens. Their fingers are thinner, and they're good about wiping yoru memory clean afterwards.
2001-08-07 02:21:25 PM  
Radiskull no like anal exam. Do not give to Radiskull.
2001-08-07 02:21:42 PM  
My ass is a one way street. Traffic goes in only one direction.
2001-08-07 02:54:11 PM  
right on.
the butt police should give poopie pokers tickets.

My mom didn't like her exam, but it probly saved her life.

- he who likes pussy -
2001-08-07 03:16:52 PM  
I'd just like to offer commendations all around for not posting the link here.
2001-08-07 03:21:23 PM  
"Oral thermometer my eye! Think warm thoughts, boy..."
2001-08-07 03:24:31 PM  
These are just a pain in the butt!
2001-08-07 03:33:38 PM  
I like being able to determine the genders of various Farkers by their reaction to this story. Generally speaking, most of the men responded with "Ack!" while the women are like, "Hey, a gynocologist visit is no thrill ride either."
2001-08-07 04:00:50 PM  
wouldn't everyone dislike an anal exam?
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