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(London Times)   World's most impressive job title: "Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ"   (timesonline.co.uk) divider line 189
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11398 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Feb 2008 at 11:47 AM (7 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2008-02-25 08:17:01 AM  
That'll never fit on the back of his hockey jersey.new2thenet
 
2008-02-25 08:43:40 AM  
Meh. In the waining days of the Byzantine Empire, one of the Emperor's titles was "Lord of Time".
 
2008-02-25 09:27:11 AM  
The fact that a 29-word title includes the descriptor "humble" makes me want to punch baby Jesus.

/love Jesus
//hate his fan base
 
2008-02-25 09:53:59 AM  
...Sounds like a boxing match introduction.
 
2008-02-25 11:10:41 AM  
i25.tinypic.com

Paladin's dead? Oh noes!
 
2008-02-25 11:50:10 AM  
Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Meh. In the waining days of the Byzantine Empire, one of the Emperor's titles was "Lord of Time".

I believe it's "timelord."
 
2008-02-25 11:50:26 AM  
So the position is open?
 
2008-02-25 11:50:59 AM  
The Ghost of Idi Amin frowns upon such a silly title.
 
2008-02-25 11:51:04 AM  
Man, that's like, higher than Jesus!
 
2008-02-25 11:51:47 AM  
Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ
 
2008-02-25 11:51:58 AM  
That's going to cost extra to get it all on a business card.
 
2008-02-25 11:52:28 AM  
mad_cow_amusement_park: Man, that's like, higher than Jesus!

hey, you only get in trouble if you claim to be humbler than Jesus. it's crazy.
 
2008-02-25 11:53:00 AM  
Let's pull out the key words here:

...Hospitaller... of the Poor...

The man cleans homeless guy puke off the floor.
 
2008-02-25 11:53:11 AM  
Goldstein: Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ
 
2008-02-25 11:53:19 AM  
Goldstein: Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ

Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ
 
2008-02-25 11:53:49 AM  
I still think "Exorcist in Chief" is a better job title.
 
2008-02-25 11:53:51 AM  
now that's a +3 Really Impressive Title.
 
2008-02-25 11:54:26 AM  
Next time wh0mprat:, next time.
 
2008-02-25 11:54:48 AM  
So we're allowed to make up titles now?

Ok here is mine;

Grand master perv of the land of farkdom and raging sex god to all the farkettes.
 
2008-02-25 11:55:05 AM  
I made it to that level in Oblivion.
 
2008-02-25 11:55:21 AM  
submitter: "Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ, Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah"

FTFY
 
2008-02-25 11:55:47 AM  
Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ Qualitative Research Analyst
 
2008-02-25 11:55:47 AM  
masiahjo: Goldstein: Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ

Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ


Secretary to the Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ
 
2008-02-25 11:56:09 AM  
No, "Chief Beer Officer" is the best job title.
 
2008-02-25 11:56:14 AM  
From Wikipedia:

"Idi Amin granted himself a number of titles, and for a period in 1977 to 1979 he was titled "His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor[3] Idi Amin Dada, VC,[4] DSO, MC, Conqueror of the British Empire [CBE] in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular and the Most Ubiquitous of all King Of Scotland."

/I recall reading in that entry that he had a longer title which also gave him complete control over all animals, fish in the sea, etc.
//Can't find it :(
 
2008-02-25 11:56:55 AM  
I was the most Illustrious Knight Commander of the Holy Order of the Fellow Soldiers of Jacques DeMolay.
 
2008-02-25 11:57:32 AM  
I like "The Grand PooBah" myself.
 
2008-02-25 11:57:42 AM  
wtf does "of" mean?
 
2008-02-25 11:57:46 AM  
I think Hef's Job title is more impressive:

Out Maker with a septet of concubines, Owner of the illustrious grotto, publisher of the glossy airbrushed bunnies, and wearer of the silken slacks.

/anybody can have an impressive job title if you describe each mundanity of your day as if it were some grand adventure.
//Eater of the toasted boiled-dough-rings coated in pulverized fat from the lactated excretions of bovines, illustrious crapper while on the humble company clock, his sloth, king something or other the firstish.
 
2008-02-25 11:57:47 AM  
I just called him Maestro.
 
2008-02-25 12:00:09 PM  
I bet that job only pays the poor humble sap guy minimum wage. And no insurance or 401k, either!
 
2008-02-25 12:01:52 PM  
Check out my web site and blog at most unfortunate domain name evar.

www.PrinceandGrandMasteroftheSovereignMilitaryHospitallerOrderofStJohn ofJerusalemofRhodesandofMaltaMostHumbleGuardianofthePoorofJesusChrist.com
 
2008-02-25 12:01:52 PM  
ReisFlynn:
Secretary to the Assistant to the Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ


Derided UnderSecretary to the ignored second Assistant to the most illustrious Regional Manager of the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ
 
2008-02-25 12:01:55 PM  
Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ's Penis
 
2008-02-25 12:02:41 PM  
Assistant Crack Whore was taken?
 
2008-02-25 12:02:48 PM  
Nine Foot Worm Creates Own Food: I just called him Maestro.

I knew him when he was just Andy.
 
2008-02-25 12:03:19 PM  
But he still can't find the black bird.
 
2008-02-25 12:03:37 PM  
So, this fella is a Lunatic?
 
2008-02-25 12:04:02 PM  
WiteBuddha: I was the most Illustrious Knight Commander of the Holy Order of the Fellow Soldiers of Jacques DeMolay.

Ah! Like the Masons...without the Tin Lizzies (too young to drive) or the drunken conventions (too young to drink booze).
 
2008-02-25 12:04:14 PM  
I am the Prince and Grand Master of the Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of St John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta, Most Humble Guardian of the Poor of Jesus Christ. Would you like fries with that?
 
2008-02-25 12:05:01 PM  
Pooh Bah is not impressed.

/lame Gilbert & Sullivan reference
 
2008-02-25 12:05:06 PM  
You know what? fark everything, I want a Hospitaller passport.

I want to be a knight.
 
2008-02-25 12:05:08 PM  
Was that not the title given to...

Johan Gambleputty devonauswern, spemmelschlit
craschcrembomfriedigidengeldonguldunguldengel burstein von
neckethresher, applebanger, horowitztinklelenzig ich habe keine
eisebahnewagen guten abend burgerbraten
blumenkopfvolksunwagenhammerklavier travitzenfierkopfendorf, hast du
eine angst und welschmerz hol´de laute af dem alltagstrott und sehe eine
artz am bahnhof und bratwurst am slachthaus ist bei ein mittlehunden von
hautkopf auf Ulm.
 
2008-02-25 12:05:45 PM  
i dunno, i kinda like "teen pregnancy implementor"
 
2008-02-25 12:06:43 PM  
Don't be so impressed. I'm his manager, and he's late in filing his TPS reports again.
 
2008-02-25 12:07:30 PM  
Just for you SamTana

farm3.static.flickr.com
 
2008-02-25 12:07:42 PM  
Just don't call him late for dinner.
 
2008-02-25 12:07:45 PM  
What does Jesus need Poor people for?
Entertainment?
Food?
 
2008-02-25 12:07:50 PM  
Would be better if his name was Tarquin Fintimlinbinwhinbimlim Bus Stop F'tang F'tang Ole Biscuit-Barrel.
 
2008-02-25 12:08:07 PM  
Isn't he one of the targets in Assassin's Creed?
 
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